Searching for the Lost Time

Kabanata 6 - Fragments / [X's POV]

There's only thing certain in my dream. The darkness. It has been a month after I woke up without any memories.

But tonight,this is different. I saw something. I don't know if it is a dream or fragments of my dream.

There's a sweet voice calling me, honey. The setting is very familiar. A grand house with a pool and servants.

"Hijo," a voice from an old lady startled me. The quality of my dream is kinda unclear except their voices. Their face are blurry.

I was sitting on a chair doing something on a laptop with earplugs. I almost curse and quickly closed it.

"Yes, Nana?" I asked.

The woman just put her hand on my shoulder. I remember that my heart's beating fast that maybe I was caught red handed doing appropriate thing. I removed my earplugs and put my attention to the person whom I called 'Nana'.

"Your mother is looking for you. You need to pick up Jackie from the port." Aniya.

Jackie? Who the hell is Jackie?

But instead, I saw myself rolled my eyes as if it was an unpleasant idea.

"Let the girl commute, Nana. I'm busy with my upcoming exams."

"But she's your-"

"Kuya!" Nana's been cut with a loud shout. I just sighed and look at a girl wearing a striped dress.

"What now, brat? I'm studying.. your brother is a highschool student, now."

The girl just shot his eyebrows up. She's chubby with a fair complexion. Her two front teeth's missing from eating too much chocolate. Is she my sister?

"Your studying? But you're just watching anime having s*x!" she shouted.

I was stunned for a moment so did Nana. She walked up to me and handed me a barbie doll and it's disassembled feet.

"Please, fix this or else... I will report you to Dad." the little girl shrieked.

I looked up to Nana, I saw that she's waiting for an explanation. I bit my lip and put my hands up as a sign of defeat.

"You brat," she scowled.

Next thing I knew, I was kneeling and facing a wall with my hands holding up. There are five books that I'm holding in the air. I was being punished because of the brat who came running to me with a barbie doll.

Nana came out with our driver. She threw dagger looks at my direction. Nana's a crazy woman. Mommy took after her but she's more scary.

"Nana," I said. I showed her my biggest apologetic smile. "Ako na ang susundo kay Jackie."

"I thought you don't like her? I heard from your cousin that you tripped her on school? You are bullying Jackie again?" tanong ni Nana.

I bit my lip. Why does she care about that Jackie? I'm her grandson.

"Nana, she's a crazy thing. It's the other way around. She keeps on pestering my life."

"Oh, hijo. You don't hurt a girl. Just shut up and go back to your punishment. I'll get Jackie instead."

"Teban?" Nana called a man in her thirty. She pointed me.

"Look out for him. If he stands while I'm not here. Put another book." bilin ni Nana.

"Masusunod po, Ma'am." sagot nito.

My eyes grew wider.

"Nana! Paano kung ma-traffic ka? Magtatagal ako ng ganito?" tanong ko.

"Exactly. That's what you get for watching those videos."

"I'll report you to DSWD, Nana. This is child abuse!" I blurted.

Nana just laughed.

"Then, try."

Nana stormed out of the room. I was left alone in the living room, still facing the wall. I heard footsteps on the staircase. I peeked through the wall and saw that chubby kid.

"Bernice!" I shouted grimly.

She just confidently trailed her way down the stairs. She even stick her tongue out. How did this brat knew that I'm watching those kind of videos? She's just four years old! And I make sure to turn off my desktop after using it.

"How did you know?" I asked her.

She just stomped her foot and gagged sarcastically. I was looking up at her while she was looking down with her arms folded.

"I have computer class in kindergarten, Kuya." she said and smiled victoriously.

"And that's your mistake. You didn't put password on your desktop. Next time, delete your history log."

I was left speechless. I looked at her back, now walking to the kitchen. That brat. Binaba ko ang hawak na libro nang tumikhim si Kuya Teban.

Nakasimangot akong bumalik sa pagkakaluhod. Nilagyan ni Mang Teban ng dalawang libro ang hawak ko. I feel my arms are about to fall.

"Kuya Teban naman eh!" reklamo ko.

But the man was just shrugging while making his way out of the living.

I looked at the kitchen where Bernice disappeared.

She and Jackie will be the death of me.

I woke up with a strong pushes of Bebang. I opened my eyes and saw how worried she was. She's about to cry.

"X, ano ba!" she shouted and punched my chest.

I looked around and I was still lying on their living area. I looked at her to see that she's really crying.

"Akala ko, hindi ka na magigising!" sigaw niya.

Agad akong bumangon. My head's hurting. What was that?

I held my head and shouted in pain.

Damn, what is this?

Nag-pa-panic naman si Bebang. Agad siyang lumapit sa akin.

"Saan? Saan masakit?" tanong niya.

Namilipit ako sa sobrang sakit ng ulo ko. It is like it's dividing me in half. Small tears from my eyes fell until I am drowned in darkness again.

Nagising ako nang malapit na magdapit hapon. Nakarinig ako ng ilang bulungan sa tabihan ko.

"Kailangan niya siguro ng doctor." boses iyon ni Sydney.

"Nagsisigaw na lang siya kanina, Ate. Kinakabahan ako." It was Bebang's voice.

"Normal 'yan sa taong may amnesia. Trust me." sabi noong isang boses na ngayon ko lang narinig.

I opened my eyes. Una kong nakita ang kaninang pamilyar na bubong. Nilingon ko si Bebang kasama ang babaeng nakaputi. Nakatingin sila pareho sa akin.

The pain's still there. Pero kaya ko na iyong tiisin. Tinapik noong babaeng nakaputi sa bebang.

"Kumuha ka ng tubig. Painumin ko si pogi." utos noong babaeng nakaputi.

Tumayo agad si Bebang at kumuha ng tubig. Naiwan kaming dalawa noong babae. She's about the age of her sister.

"Hello," bati niya at tinulungan akong makatayo. "Ako si Peri, registered nurse ako sa center."

I nodded.

I can't talk. Nanghihina ang buing katawan ko.

Dumating si Bebang at agad akong pinainom. Nakatitig ako sa kaniya. Mukhang pagod pa siya.

"Nakakainis ka naman eh! Akala ko 'di ka na magigising. I hate you, X." aniya.

Ngumiti ako.

"Puwede bang hindi ako gumising? E 'di hindi ko na nakita ang mukha mo?" pabiro kong sinabi sa kabila ng sakit ng ulo ko.

"'Yan! Mas gusto ko 'yang ganiyan ka. Huwag ka na uling mahihimatay ha? Papatayin kita." banta niya.

Tumawa ako and suddenly I remembered the girl in my dreams.

Bernice. Is she my sister?

"Bebang. Hindi mapipigilan ni X, ang mahimatay. Normal iyon sa mga pasiyenteng may amnesia." ani Peri.

"Huwag kang mag-alala, pogi. Kapag nag-duty ako sa hospital, titingnan ko kung may mga doctor na puwedeng tumulong sa'yo."

"Salamat, Peri." sabi ko.

Tiningnan niya si Bebang.

"Oh siya. Aalis na ako. May duty pa ako." paalam nito.

Umalis na si Peri at kami na lang ni Bebang. Nanatili sa utak ko ang panaginip ko.

Is that a dream? O totoo iyon? But it feels real. Parang totoo lahat.

Nana, Jackie, Teban and Bernice. I can remember their names and single detail from them. But how come I cannot remember their face?

Hinawakan ko ang ulo at ginulo iyon.

"Huy, X. Okay ka pa ba?" tanong ni Bebang.

"May naalala ako." sabi ko na nakapagpagulat kay Bebang. Tiningnan naman niya ako na parang nag-aalala.

"Lahat? Kilala mo na ang sarili mo? What's your name?" sunod sunod na sabi niya.

Umiling ako.

"Naalala ko lang ang bahay namin. I remember that there's my Nana, my sister and they keeps on mentioning Jackie."

Nakikinig naman si Bebang. I shrugged. I am sure that Bernice is my sister. Teban, the one that Nana called is our house servant. But who's Jackie?

Mukhang iyon din ang nasa isip ni Bebang. Pinagmamasdan niya ako.

"Baka si Jackie, ang girlfriend mo?" tanong niya.

Nanatili akong nakatingin kay Bebang. There's a part of me that is happy that I'm starting to remember things but the bigger part's saying that the possibility of Jackie's my girlfriend makes it uncomfortable.

"I think not. I despise her from my memory. Maybe, she's my enemy. I have this gut feeling that I don't have any romantic relationship with her." sagot ko.

"Pero maganda 'yan. Nabubuo mo na ang alaala mo. Mukhang mapapadali ang recovery mo. Pero ang tanong, bakit ka sa dagat natagpuan?" tanong niya.

"Iyon din ang tanong ko." sabi ko. "I don't remember staying near the beach. Our house is in the city. But I heard from my Nana about a port. She told me that Jackie's in the port!"

"Baka si Jackie ang dahilan?" tanong niya.

I shrugged. Nanlaki ang mga mata niya.

"Baka tinulak ka niya sa dagat kasi diba ayaw mo sa kaniya?"

"That makes sense." sagot ko.

"Sabi mo, nasa city ang bahay niyo. Natatandaan mo kung ano ang hitsura ng compound niyo?" she asked.

Umiling ako. It's just fragment and it's not even that detailed. The scene was so blurry.

"Hindi. But I remember that our house is big and it's grand. There's a wooden staircase."

Kumuha si Bebang ng notebook at sinulat doon ang mga sinasabi ko.

"Wow! So ibig sabihin, mayaman ka talaga? Dugong bughaw ka X! Iyon ang first clue natin." nakangising sabi niya na para bang nanalo siya ng jackpot.

"Huwag mo kong kalimutang bayaran kapag nakaalala ka na." paalala niya.

Napangiti ako sa sinabi niya.

"Love na lang ang ibabayad ko sa'yo? O kaya katawan ko?" sagot ko.

"Lugi ako. Hindi ako mabubusog niyan." reklamo niya.

Binalik niya ang atensiyon sa pagsusulat. I peeked on what's written on it.

Bahay sa city.

Nana.

Teban.

Bernice.

Port.

Jackie.

"Yan! May six clues na tayo, X. Kaunti na lang, makakabalik na ang memories mo." she smiled sweetly while looking at the notebook.

And first time in my life, I saw how beautiful she is.