Collateral Damage |+18|

6. You haven't understood the extent to which you drive me crazy. [Part 1]

You haven't understood the extent to which you drive me crazy.

Matheo.

"Kacey!" I call out to her, resting my hands on my desk, trying with all my might to control my temper.

"Sir?" She stumbles into my office, holding her notebook tightly to her chest. Her eyes look alarmed, and I suspect I've been difficult to deal with for the past three days.

"Email Defne and ask her to come in immediately to talk to me."

Kacey looks at me so confused that I inevitably become more enraged at the ridiculous situation I am in.

"Sir, why don't you do it from your own e-mail?"

"Do it" I repeat quietly, trying to control my anger, but to no avail. So I finally sigh a soft sigh: "Please."

Kacey is still looking at me, puzzled by my request, but she goes out to do what I asked her to do.

I run my hands over my face, trying to clear my head and bring down some of the anger I feel. But how the hell does Defne dare mark my emails as spam? They keep bouncing, the emails I send to my subordinate keep bouncing because she has discarded me. Me, the f*****g owner of the company. Her boss.

When Kacey comes back in and looks at me warily, I already know Defne has refused to come. I just don't even know why I'm f*****g trying.

"f**k" I mutter under my breath and stand up, heading straight for the girl who pulls my world out of its orbit more and more every day.

She gets under my skin so easily. I remember the cold feeling that came over me when she announced her resignation and then the anger when I understood that she was ignoring me. She unsettles me, takes me to the extremes of every feeling. Back and forth, lurching me back and forth at her whim. And I try, I try to arm myself with patience, I swear I try, but when things like this happen I get totally blinded and only care about getting to her.

So to hell with the prying eyes watching me march hurriedly through the design department. I don't care if others are watching. I only care about her. And I see her. I find her and there's Defne. Exactly as I knew she would be. With her messy hair down, the curls falling in her face as she rummages through the colorful post-it notes in her cubicle; the messiest cubicle on the entire floor.

Running a hand over my mouth to hide the bitter smile that wants to come out of me, I crouch down to her height and say into her ear, making sure my lips brush against her skin: "In my office. Now."

Defne hops in her chair and stares in front of her, unmoving as I breathe in that scent on her neck that's driving me crazy.

"I'm busy."

"Defne..."

"I answer to Scarlett, not you."

I laugh, but I'm sure there's no joy there.

So that's how things are going to go.

For a woman who has been after me since she met me, Scarlett has really taken Defne under her wing. For a second I wonder if it's a strategy of hers, but I immediately dismiss the idea when I remember how emphatic she has been about how talented and necessary Defne is to her team.

Although I've always suspected that Scarlett has only pursued me out of ambition, not because she really likes me -God knows there's not a hint of attraction between us-this confirms it. Scarlett wants me for what I can provide to her career, despite how emphatically I've made it clear to her that I don't get involved with my employees.

I laugh again because what the heck?

Here I am, behind this shiny little firecracker, breaking all my rules and out of my mind because she's been ignoring me for three f*****g days.

"Scarlett happens to answer to me, so, if you don't want to get your superior in trouble, I suggest you get off your cute little ass and follow me into my office."

"No."

"Defne..."

"Matheo..."

"Defne, it turns out I remembered a trait about me that I had forgotten" I slowly pull her hair back, exposing more of her neck, not caring who's watching. With my eyes fixed on her profile, I lean closer and whisper, "And that is that I always get what I want, Buttercup, no matter what methods I have to use. And I want you in my office, now."

"No."

"I swear to God, Defne, I'm going to put you over my shoulder and take you out in front of everyone's eyes, not giving a s**t about how unhinged I get when it comes to you."

"You wouldn't."

"Try me."

She finally turns her face and looks at me, her eyes look so furious that I know I push her to the limit just as much, if not more, than she pushes me.

We stare at each other for several seconds, daring the other to give in, both of us planted in our positions without giving in.

Then I start to hear the others murmuring and I know I'll regret this later, but right now I just want to have her alone.

That's all I f*****g want.

I don't give a s**t what to talk about, I don't care if others find out how unhinged she has me, I don't care if I break my unimpeachable reputation for her.

Defne ignoring me ends today, right now.

I count to three and when she still doesn't move, I nod, because that's the way she wanted it.

I take her by the hand and pull her to her feet, ignoring the gasps of the people around. As I bend down to hoist her over my shoulder, Defne takes a step back and says a loud and clear: "Good!"

"Go ahead" I point in front of me, inviting her to follow.

I watch her silently going in front of me, walking faster than she should and with a jerky movement of her hips that shows she is doing this against her will. She almost bumps into two people on her triumphant way, but both times I hold her elbow, steadying her.

Mentally, I remind myself to ask Kacey to send an email to everyone, warning them that if Defne's or my name hits the media with gossipy gossip, there are going to be layoffs.

When we enter my office, I point to the chair for her to sit down, but she stands in the middle of the room with her arms crossed, waiting for me to speak without even deigning to look at me.

I lean my hip against my desk and look at her, equally crossed-armed as I contemplate the chances of getting out alive if I go there and wipe the frown off her mouth with a kiss.

I close my eyes and take a breath, pushing the thought out of my head.

"Defne, you are my employee," I remind her, "If I ask you to come to my office, you come to my office.

"If you dislike me so much, why don't you just stay the hell away from me?"

I recoil at her question, surprised that she is so direct and speaks to me with such hostility. There's a coldness in her voice that wasn't there before, a coldness that makes me frown because I resent her obvious anger at me.