My Runaway Bride (English)

Chapter 11

Xian, Samantha and Sean brought Armie to her room. Naomi and Larry decided to take a shower, Cuttie followed them after a few minutes. Dylan and Kenneth stayed with me at the poolside.

"They've been really good at keeping their relationship before, no one noticed even when they act like it already. Today I haven't seen them talk but Armie collapsed and Xian is already by her side." Dylan chuckled humorlessly. He walked towards the table to get a can of beer.

"Did they get back together already? I don't understand why they like to keep it from us."

I pulled the ends of the towel to cover my body properly. The night is still young and it's cold, I can feel my lips trembling.

"Did they talk to you? How are you keeping up with those two, Kim?"

I heaved out a sigh and shut my eyes tightly. As much as I want to, I don't want to open up about this. We're all very sensitive about this that we tried to act cool today, but it's just really heavy, pretending is never easy.

In the end, I couldn't respond. No, I chose not to respond. What should I say then if I want to?

I apologized to Xian but we never really talked about anything, he even told me it wasn't my responsibility to help him save their company. We didn't talk about his relationship with Armie. And Armie? She doesn't even smile at me even when we're here all day.

She came here not to join us in this small party, she came here to get Xian back. And even when I heard it from Xian, that they're not getting back together, it still worries me and I don't know why.

I'm worried because I want them to get back together but I can't let them do that. I'm worried that I can't stick to my plan, I'm worried that I can't just let them be together. I'm worried that I just wasted the decision I made before running away from our wedding. I was so sure I'm letting him go back then but right now, it's just so hard to stand for that decision.

Dylan tapped me on my shoulder, "You know I care for the both of you, you are both like a sister to me. I don't want to see you being crushed between your feelings for Xian and your friendship with Armie. Because I don't think Armie's willing to give up on him even when it means losing you as her friend. You better make up your mind while it's not yet too late."

I smiled sadly as I stare at the water at the pool. He's right, I am so torn between the two of them yet I can see Armie prioritizing Xian, like she doesn't really care about our friendship, like she doesn't care about anything except Xian.

I smiled sadly because I wish I could do the same. I wish I could choose what I want and focus on that instead. I wish I could easily choose between feelings and friendship but I can't. And I'm sad because it's the truth.

"I'll go take a shower now, aren't you coming in? It's cold, you should get changed."

"I'll stay for a bit." I gave him a reassuring smile when he stared at me. In the end, he couldn't make me stand so he was left with no choice but to leave me.

I stayed there for a few minutes staring at the serene water of the pool. I sighed when I realized something. Armie's just like this water, serene, beautiful and cool but gets distorted when you throw something at her, when you shake her.

"Aren't you cold?" I looked up and saw Ken standing beside me, towering over me.

I blinked twice, "H-how long have you been there?"

He chuckled. He pulled a chair so he can sit beside me. "I didn't leave, I was watching you."

I sighed, I smiled at him. "You must have seen me spacing out."

"I wasn't wrong when I thought you're weary since this morning. Your lips do smile but your eyes, they can't hide what you feel."

I bit my lower lip and avoided his gaze. Really? I was that obvious? Did my friends notice that? Is that why Naomi and Cuttie kept asking if I'm okay? How about Xian? Did he notice that?

"I know it's not gonna be that easy, after running away from your wedding, after being on the headlines and news for that week. After embarassing both your families, I know it's not gonna be that easy for you."

I smiled sadly. I looked back at the water and sighed.

"I thought I did the right thing. I thought I did them both a favor, I thought I was brave enough to tell the people that I can't marry for business. I was so sure of my decisions that day, that I will ditch him because he's not for me, that I want them to be together because I'm choosing friendship over my own feelings. But something's shaking that decision right now, something's telling me I should be selfish right now."

"It's okay, it's okay to be selfish sometimes. It's okay that you want to be happy too. Afterall, we live for ourselves and not for other people. We make our own happiness so if we don't choose it then we can't have it. It's just that, there are things that we have to give up too, in order to be happy."

I stared at him. He's watching the serene water too. Just like me, does he see the water as a person too?

He looked at me and smiled when he saw me staring. "You're probably thinking why am I saying these to you, we're not even close." He chuckled.

I smiled, I shook my head. "We're friends right? Dylan brought you here so we can all be friends."

The smile on his lips disappeared, like he heard something unbelievable from me.

"W-why? Don't you want us to be your friends?"

He chuckled. He craned his neck and started to laugh. He looked at me with a smile on his face, "You're really something Kimberly."

"Huh?"

He smiled evenmore, "I am contented looking at you from afar, sitting with you and your friends during lunch. I was fine just by seeing you smile and blush. But you are completely shaking my world right now."

"W-what do you mean?"

"I like you Kim, I've been liking you secretly not until today that I've seen like this. How can Xian ignore you, that I don't know. But I am sure I like you and I want to show it to you."

I felt like all the blood in my body went up to my head. My cheeks burned and he smiled evenmore when he saw that.

"You should really make up your mind Kim, I'll be waiting here to catch you if you choose to let them both go."

"Ken I..I don't want you to wait for--"

"I'll wait because I want to. I will let you decide on your own and I will support whatever decision you'll make. I will stop if you want to choose Xian. I will love you Kim, I won't ask you to love me or even like me back."

I stared at him. Does he really like me for him to say that? Why is he putting his self to this? What are his choices? Love me and wait for me? If I choose to let Xian be happy with Armie it won't still mean I can love him. Or is it possible? To teach yourself to love a person? I would have done that before if it's possible. And what's the next option? Stay away and forget about me if I choose Xian? Either ways, he will only end up hurting his self. Why is he doing this?

He smiled at me, "So you better try to love him more so I won't be able to take you away from him." He looked back at the water and said, “Because just like that calm water, I might be nothing when I’m at rest. But when I start moving, I can be a threat."

It was all that's on my mind even until I went to bed, the sincerity and hope that I saw in his eyes. I have never seen someone that sincere towards me. It wasn't new to me, getting confessions from other guys at school but unlike all of them, why do I feel that Ken is the most sincere?

I shook my head and closed my eyes to forget about his face. Why am I thinking about him now? Why am I not thinking about Xian?

I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. I pulled my pillow and hugged it tight. Kenneth Yu is not just an ordinary student at the university, he is very popular. He's the varsity captain and also the lead singer of the Golden Strings, a very famous band because of its handsome and talented members.

My eyes widened, realizing that someone like him just confessed to me. Why am I feeling this way? Why am I happy?

Three consecutive knocks at my door stopped me from my thoughts. I sat and glanced at the digital clock beside my bed, it's twelve midnight, who's knocking at my door at this hour?

Is it Xian? My heart pounded at the thought but then realized that he's not gonna knock if he wants to get in. He has that habit of invading my privacy whenever he wants to so I know it's not him. It's probably Naomi or Cuttie.

I sighed before walking towards the door. I was about to open it when I heard voices outside. I pressed the side of my fave at the door so I can hear it properly.

"Why is she not opening? Is she asleep?"

"Who knows? Just open it." I was right, it's Naomi and Cuttie. I smiled. I was about to open the door when I heard the door infront of my room opened.

"She's already sleeping, why don't you just go back to your room and let her rest?" My eyes widened when I heard Xian.

Naomi chuckled, "We just want to be with her, we know she's sad. Is it bad to want to console you friend?"

There was a moment of silence. I pressed my ears more to make sure I can hear everything.

"If you care about her why won't you just make up your mind Xian? Why do you always have to act like you care for her if you don't have plans to choose her in the end?"

I covered my mouth, shocked at how Naomi's being straightforward. I waited for Xian's response but he didn't say anything. I can imagine Naomi rolling her eyes right now.

"What a jerk. Let's go Carl Trey, I don't like it that much in here." And then I heard their footsteps away.

I leaned at the door and sighed. How I wish to hear his answer, maybe that way I can just decide too. I realized I probably won't be able to decide unless he decides too, and that will be the same for Ken. We're all trapped in each others decision, it's just that if Xian will choose Armie, I will probably run to Ken and that will make him happy. Both of their happiness then will only mean pain to me. And my happiness, will cause pain to Ken and Armie.

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