Something Borrowed

Chapter 9. The Almost Kiss

Chapter 9. The Almost Kiss

(Tamara)

Joel Turner was the most beautiful baby Tamara had ever seen, next to her nephew Ray. Lucas stood next to her, his body rigid as he kept looking at Joel, as if he was waiting for the boy to scream bloody murder or something. As the funeral march started, Lucas looked at her and then at Joel.

"I can take care of him, if you want to go," Tamara said, and Lucas shook his head at her.

"You should go, too. Why don't you come with me? I can drive you there?" Lucas gave her a hesitant look and Tamara stared above his head for a moment.

"Is it okay?"

"At least my son is not screaming when he is with you. So it is more than okay." Lucas said as he walked out and Tamara followed him, Joel on her hips.

Lucas opened the car door and Tamara placed Joel in the booster seat before sitting next to him.

"Do I look like I am your chauffeur?" Lucas grunted as he opened the car door and sat in the driver's seat. He turned to her, and narrowed his eyes at her. Tamara smirked at him.

"I want to sit next to the cute one, not the grumpy one." Tamara said with a teasing grin and Lucas frowned at her, his brown eyes turning a shade darker, making weird birds flutter in Tamara's stomach, before he turned away from her. He started the car engine and drove away.

Tamara made weird noises at the baby and Joel giggled.

He was cute, a complete replica of Lucas, but his eyes, those soft blue eyes, they were June's eyes. It madeTamara's stomach twist.

“You know your daddy bear is a very grumpy bear, wittle rabbit?" Tamara said in a silly tone and Joel giggled. It made Tamara smile.

"I am not grumpy," Lucas grunted.

"You sound grumpy even as you say you are not," Tamara commented as she rubbed her finger against the soft cheek of the chubby baby and the baby babbled. "My, my, little Joey. You are such a charmer. You should share some of that charm with your dad. The guy needs all the help he can get." Tamara said in a mocking tone and Joel giggled as if he understood it. The sound tinkled inside the car like soft bells...

"Tamara, has anyone ever told you you are an annoying person?"

"Thank you," she said with a smirk and he grunted something under his breath.

Lucas stopped the car when they reached the graveyard. Tamara sighed as she picked up the bundle of joy from his booster seat and she followed Lucas.

They stood in front of the grave as June's coffin was lowered. Tamara felt her neck prickling, as if someone was staring at her. She looked around and saw someone standing behind the tree a few feet from the grave site. The hoodie was pulled over his head and his face was covered in the shadow. Tamara shivered as she pulled the baby closer to her. She could hear June's whispering, my baby and I, I think we are in danger.

He peered at Tamara from the comfort of his hoodie and Tamara took a step towards the man. He turned and briskly walked away. Tamara's heart was unsettled. It flailed beneath her ribs and her palms were sweaty. Everyone around her was only looking at June's casket and they all missed the man.

Who the hell is he? What is he doing here? Is he just a straggler or does he have a reason to be here?

She worried she was over imagining things. She worried she wasn't being serious enough. Nothing made sense to Tamara, not anymore. She didn't know what to trust or who to trust. Her heart was a weird mess and she kept looking at the baby in her hands. She couldn't imagine anyone wanting to hurt this beautiful creature, but this world wasn't a kind or generous place. This world was full of cruel, cunning people, who wore masks of normalcy.

When the funeral was over, Rosaline walked towards Tamara with a soft smile. "Thank you, Tamara." She said as Tamara handed Joel to Rosaline. "He likes you, doesn't he?" Rosaline sighed. "He doesn't feel comfortable with us. June has always kept him away from us."

Tamara nodded her head with an understanding smile. June was also possessive about her things. As soon as Tamara and June became friends, June had slowly, stealthily pulled Tamara away from her other friends. It was done with such careful skill that Tamara hadn't noticed at first. But when she noticed, it was already too late.

"I hope you will get to spend more time after this. He is such a precious baby." Tamara said as she touched a finger to his cheek before she turned and left with her father and mother.

* * *

Back at home, Tamara took a bath and changed into something comfortable. She bunched her hair in a messy bun before she walked downstairs. Her father gave her a smile.

"Tammie, you want anything to eat?"

"When has Tammie ever said no to food, dad?" Neil commented and Tamara poked her tongue at her brother. They sat together in the table as Holly and mom bought coffee and cookies and some roasted chicken.

"So Tamara, how is your work going? Holly said you are vying for the managing editor position. How is it looking?" Derek Slater, Holly's husband of five years, looked at Tamara with a smile. Holly and Derek had married right after college and everyone thought it would be one of those marriages that fell apart as time passed, but Holly and Derek proved how wrong everyone was. They were still so much in love and it was visible the way Derek looked at his wife and the way Holly touched him every now and then, as if she couldn't live without touching him.

It made Tamara's heart squeeze. She wanted something like that. Something that was effortless and easy. Tamara wanted to find someone who made her feel like she was their whole world. But in all of her twenty-six years, she was in love once with someone who had then gone and married Tamara's ex-bestie. She had had a few boyfriends over the years, but somehow none of them stuck around long enough for the relationship to become something more. And then there was Sebastian. Tamara's dating life was a complete and utter disaster.

"Horribly, Derek. My managing editor keeps telling me she is retiring and my friends tell me the only way she is getting out of the office is in her coffin." Tamara grumbled as she bit into the soft, tender chicken.

They all chuckled at her and she shook her head. "Guys, it is not funny."

"It is funny, Tammie. Why don't you find another job if you are not completely okay with it?" Natalie asked.

"No, I love my job. I just wish Marienne would retire. I am almost tempted to use one of Stefan's advice." Tamara grunted and her mom comforted her, saying it would all turn out for the best. When they finished eating, Derek, who was a veterinarian, said he had an appointment with a cocker spaniel and kissed Holly on her cheek and left. Tamara's mom said she would go and be with Grace Miller for a while and her dad walked inside his room, saying he needed some shut eyes, leaving the siblings alone.

Tamara grabbed a babbling Ray and they all sat in front of the TV as Natalie and Neil started fighting about what to watch.

"I want to watch Stranger things," Neil said.

"I want to watch Lucifer," Natalie said.

"I want you to shut up." Holly grunted.

But Tamara was in an another world. Their constant bickering didn't disturb her trance. She kept thinking about Joel and Lucas and how the boys made her stomach flip. She was sure it wasn't going to end well for her, if she stayed here anymore. She had to run away, soon. She couldn't afford the distractions of two handsome men. Not now. She had her hands full with Marienne and her constant tyranny and her job.

“What is she dreaming about?” Natalie whispered to Holly.

"Lucas..."

Now that snapped Tamara out of her daydream. She glared at her sister and Holly gave her an innocent look. Innocent, my ass.

“What did you say?" Tamara glared at Holly. Holly gave her a small smirk before she shrugged her shoulders with a nonchalant look in her eyes.

“I said Lucas is hot!” Holly’s smile was taunting. Tamara bared her teeth at her sister. Holly just gave a shrug and Tamara noticed Derek was standing in the doorway looking at his wife with a small, testy smile.

"And Derek, is he not?" Tamara taunted and Holly gave a dreamy sigh.

“Oh..." Holly sighed. "My husband is the hottest. He had one hell of a body and the ass of that man... it is to die for," Holly said dreamily and Derek's smile was wicked as he stared at Holly. Tamara didn’t want to imagine what he was imagining in his mind.

He walked inside and pulled Holly up and Holly snuggled closer to him as he placed a quick kiss on Holly's lips.

Whew. Ugh! Tamara thought.

"Yikes. young girls here, Holly. TMI." Natalie shook her head.

"You’re not young; I saw you playing tennis with Alan's tongue the other day and you didn't even care that your twin brother was there. It is probably going to scar me for life, give me nightmares for years.” Neil said with an exaggerated smile.

"Don't be a drama queen, Neil." Natalie groused.

Tamara leaned against the couch, quite content with just watching her siblings fight as little Ray slept peacefully in her arms.

"Hey Tam, Derek and I are going out. Can you look after him?" Holly asked as she took the baby from Tamara and she nodded. "I will just put him in the crib in the nursery."

Holly and Derek lived a few streets away, but Ray often spent time in their mom and dad's place, so they decided to have a makeshift nursery in one of the spare rooms. Tamara stood up and followed her sister to the nursery. She sat down, grabbed a book and settled in.

A few hours later, Tamara was deep in her book and Ray was still in slumber land, when the bell rang. Tamara wondered who it was as she adjusted her loose T-shirt and walked out. She opened the door to find Lucas standing there, looking flustered and red. He looked disheveled and his eyes were tired. He didn't even spare her a glance as he walked inside the house as if he owned it or something.

"You can come in," Tamara said sarcastically and he sighed.

"Is Holly here?" He asked Tamara without even giving her a glance.

She stood there, her hands on her hips and glaring at him. Jerk. One moment he was decent and warm and generous and then as if the switch is flipped, he goes back to being an arrogant, smug ass...

This man is not good for my health. God. He is such a complex puzzle and I don't have time to solve him.

But you want to solve him, don't you? Her inner voice purred. Tamara studiously ignored it.

“Am I invisible or something?" She gritted her teeth and he sighed.

"You are not microscopic. So I can see you. Now tell me where Holly is." He grumbled moodily.

"Holly is out on a date with her husband." Tamara answered and Lucas cursed the exact moment when Tamara's mom walked in. He gave her a smile and Tamara's mom looked at him with concern.

"Is everything alright, Lucas?"

"Hi, Rebecca, how are you?" Lucas instantly became the polite gentleman he really was not.

What an amazing actor, Tamara thought with a bitter look.

"I am fine, Lucas. Now tell me why you look like you have been running a marathon?"

"It is Joel. He keeps crying and my mom has a severe headache and so she took some pills and she was already getting drowsy. I don't-" he mumbled something. "I don't know what is wrong with him. He doesn't have a fever or anything. I checked. But he is still screaming and-"

“Tammie can come with you, since Holly isn’t here. And she’s good with babies, Luc. Don't worry."

Well, thank you mom. You’re definitely generous!

“So, honey, why don't you go with Lucas?” Her mom asked with a polite grin, which wasn’t polite at all.

"What’ll be the possibility of me saying no?" Tamara quirked her brows, but she really wanted to go. She was worried about Joel, too, but she wouldn't admit it in front of Lucas.

"Zilch?!" She said. Mom… I love you!

"Well, am I at least allowed to change into something respectable?" Tamara said as she threw a pointed look at her mom and her mom shrugged.

"You look fine. Just go."

"Mom..." Tamara hissed.

"Thanks Rebecca, but it is okay. I have to know how to take care of him, without help." Lucas said with a small wince and Tamara's heart gave a mighty tug and her mom’s face all but melted. She grabbed his hand and forced him to stop.

“Luc, I know it is too soon, but you should marry someone, you know, who’ll treat your son as her own. You should at least marry for the boy!” Her mom said. Sometimes, her mom didn't know when to stop pushing her nose into unwanted situations. Pushy... see, that as what she was talking about.

A very good advice mom. Why don't you find a bride for him, as well?

Tamara felt a strange twist as she imagined Lucas being married to someone else. Well, hello, he was already married and divorced and his wife was now dead, and why was she feeling weird to hear her mom telling him to find a nice girl?

Good noon, welcome to the Mental Asylum, Ms. Garrett!

“No, Rebecca, been there, done that and regretted it!”

Okay, what was so bad? That he didn’t want to marry or that he regretted his decision to marry June? Obviously, not the second, but why did the first seem to bother her so much? It wasn’t like she was waiting in a queue for him to get down on his knees and propose to her, right?

Why do I care whether he want to marry or not? What the heck is my problem?

Run, Tammie, Run. Fast and far. This place is going to be the death of you, again!

“Oh, honey, are you going yet? Don’t just stand there like a robot." Her mom said.

She all but dragged Tamara and pushed her out of the door, and handed a jacket to Tamara. If anyone witnessed the scene, they might immediately believe that Tamara was being banished from her own house by her own mom.

“Thank you mom, love you so much!” Tamara glared at the closed door, and stomped along the dark road. Lucas' house was only five houses down from Tamara's and, once upon a time, it had given plenty of opportunity for Tamara to stalk and stare at Lucas Turner.

“Don’t walk too fast. The road is slippery, princess.” Before his smug voice finished the sentence, her butt was greeted by the cold, hard pavement.

Nice meeting you too, floor!

"What did I tell you?" He gloated as he pushed his hand towards her and she grabbed it. She would rather not, but she had no other choice. Her butt was hurting and the cold was like a sting.

"Ow." She said as he pulled her up and she stumbled and grabbed his shirt. His body was impossibly closer to her and in the cold, he was all hot and warm.

"Luc..." she whispered when she realized he was staring at her, his eyes dark and intense. She licked her lips and gulped. He touched her face with a finger. Her heart stopped. Her breath hitched. Her stomach was filled with wild eagles.

In the shadows and the light glow of the white street lamp, he looked like a fallen angel. His honey-brown eyes had turned impossibly darker and it made Tamara's stomach clench in desire. Her eyes searched his face.He leaned in closer to her and she could feel his minty breath teasing her frozen skin.

She felt red-hot desire coursing through her body. Her skin was on fire.

Somewhere in the distance, a car honked and they both jumped away. She looked at him with disappointment and he avoided her gaze.

"It is so cold. Let's go." His voice was hoarse as he turned away from her.

In the dark silence, they both walked, and Tamara couldn't help but wonder...

What if the stupid car hadn't honked?

___