I Love My Husband But....

Chapter 8

* I avoid my husband when he first gets home. Then I relax and shake it off, because I, realize that I didn't actually cheat just by talking to someone. (No matter how handsome they are) Surprisingly I didn't have fantasizing thoughts about him that night, as I, laid in bed thinking about his smile. It was the last thing that I remember before I went to sleep.

(I have to avoid him) I think to myself the next morning as I work. It's hard to concentrate on work when his deep dimpled smile keeps popping into my head. (Is this any different than fantasizing over a celebrity?) I ask myself. (In my mind of course) I wish I had someone to talk to. I can't talk to any of my sisters, they'd think that I was crazy and I usually tell my husband all of my problems. I don't know if he listens or not but it's good to vent, even if, he doesn't give his opinion or any feedback whatsoever.

I felt bad for saying no to my son when he asked to go to the park. I don't know if he'll be there, but I can't take any chances. "Go outside in the back and play with your sister," "But I always play with her, I want to play basketball with my friends," "We'll go tomorrow okay" "Yes!" "Thank you!" he says before he hugs me, then he gives me a little kiss on the cheek. I shake my head as he grabs his sister to take her out back.

I guess we will be fine as long we go at our usual time. We ran into him because we were there earlier than usual. When we get to the park we see that his friends haven't arrived, so he, goes off and plays by himself, even though, I offered to play with him. (I guess I'm too girly to play with him)

I don't get this kid. We have fun playing his video games and other things, and then, he gets into his sexist attitude. I guess all boys are like that at one time or another in their life. (We can only hope that they grow out of it before they start dating)

I get happy when he waves and motions for me to go over. At least I thought it was for me, until I hear a chuckle from behind me. "How are you princess,?" "Hi... I'm doing pretty good" "Oh, you meant Luci," I say a little more than slightly embarrassed. "I was going to get to you next Goddess," he says and I'm embarrassed by the smile that came across my lips. I tried to put my lips inside of my mouth, but my sappy smile was still evident.

"Uh, are you going to play basketball with Xane,?" I quickly ask, so that, I don't have to say much more to him and so I don't have to stay in this embarrassing moment. What am I supposed to say to that? My own husband rarely calls me by my name and this guy is doing too much. (I'm even too embarrassed to feel flattered)

"Come on let's play with him," he says as he bends down to pick up some little flowers to give one to Luci and the rest to me. "I was going to get her something to snack on" "You want eat eat baby?" I say as I bend down to look at her.

Lucky for me she always wants to snack, and he, laughs as she tries to eat the flower. "Luci baby, that's not fruit," I say as I take it out of her mouth. "Okay... well maybe next time," He says as he smiles, then he, walks over to Xane as I look away and pretend to look for flowers in Luci's mouth. (This isn't the first time she has tried to eat flowers and it probably won't be the last)

I give her some of the snacks that I packed for her, as I, watch them play. I smile at the fact that they are both competitive, neither one of them back down. I expected my son to give his all, he is very competitive. Sometimes he will let his sister or me win, but he is ruthless with every else.

Willis surprised me by not being easy on him, and it, was obvious that he was toying with him. It was hard for me to watch, because, he was frustrating my baby. (I should have played so that I could help him,) That's what we do at home. Me and him gang up on my husband, because, he cheats and he's bigger than us. We also tickle him to win if we have to, since he, is very ticklish. Now that I think about it, it has been a while since we've done that. (I might need to start up a tickle fight when he gets home tonight)

"Hey, we were waiting for our ice creams," says Willis as he and Xane walk over. "I wan ice treen," (I want ice cream,) says Luci as she jumps up and down and pulls at my shirt. "Okay," I say as I grab her hand before she pulls to much. "Do you want one?" I say to Xane. "Nah, I'll just my drink," he says as he grabs his sports drink.

"You can have one, Willis is eating one too" I say thinking he doesn't want to seem childish, even though, he is. (Very) "Maybe later, Jasper and Matt are here, and everyone else is on their way too," "Okay, let me know if you need anything," "I will," he says as he gives me a sly smirk. Then he runs off to his friends.

"I love you," I yell causing his friends to laugh. He smiles and says it back not in the least embarrassed. "If I call him one of his nicknames that I've called him, since he, was a baby he'd freak out and be embarrassed," "He's fine if I tell him that I love him, and he, even hugs me in front of them," I explain when I see the look of shock on his face.

We talk about how Xane and him played, but, I didn't tell him how I was willing to cheat in order for my son to win. We also talk about how Luci learned so many words as we eat our ice creams. "I notice when you talk about your kids you open up and talk more," he says surprising me. I smile as I think about it.

"You'll understand when you get children" "If you don't already have them" Truthfully, I didn't really care if he had children or not. It's not like I was trying to get to know him. I was fine, not even knowing his name, and just, getting a quick fantasy of a night of passion on in my head.

"I don't have any kids," he says as he shrugs. "Oh sorry, if I offended you," I say quickly. "You're fine" "Don't worry we're friends," "How are we supposed to get to know each other if we don't talk?" I nod agreeing, but I don't dare keep this conversation going, because, I don't care to know his life story. (I know, some friend I am)

The thing is, I'm trying to stay away from him. Especially since he's being extra nice. I am not an easy lay Sir. (Well that's what I keep telling myself) Even though days ago, I wanted him to 'touch my body'. (At least that's the song that popped into my head when I first saw him) Go back to your cute, bubbly, short skirt wearing, throwing themselves all over you bimbos. I don't know what type of women he likes but I imagine that's what all handsome men like him are into.

"Hey you should definitely come to the lounge this Saturday," "There are a lot of famous people and I'll sing" "Oh wow, they have live music,?" I ask, now interested. "Yes and if you want you can sing too," he says with a smile.

"I'll see if my sister wants to go with me," "Okay great," "I would invite some friends but I'll wait until next time" "That is if you like it, and, I'm pretty sure you will," "We'll see" I say with a small controlled smile. (Maybe I can start going to the lounge as a way to distress instead of walking laps through the isles at grocery stores)

I would invite my husband but he doesn't like places like this so we've never gone. I guess it never occurred to me that I could go by myself. I could sit at the bar and just listen to music. I could maybe even get a drink or two. (Well I have my Saturday planned out)

I may not go this Saturday, because, there was no way that I could let my sister know about him. She would think that I was weird by having a male friend after, so many years of my husband being my only best friend.

He leaves soon after making me promise to go to the lounge. Sir Willis, people lie all the time, or, they just simply forget. (Maybe I'll remember some important thing I have to do that day) It's not like he can call me and get on to me for not going. If I see him around, which I know I will. I will be sure to stand strong by my lie.