LEFT AT THE ALTER

Chapter 3

I looked around my room to figure out the perfect place to hang the Art. As I looked around my room, on the walls there was already so much there like the picture collage I had put there, lights, some plants I picked from the shop. I moved towards the collage and it was filled with pictures of my friends and of I and Mike too. It just really felt like I couldn't stand seeing him around anywhere.

I dropped the Art on the bed as I removed my pictures with Mike out of the collage and also some of his pictures that had been hanged around my room.

I also brought out a small box from beneath my bed. It was a box where I kept all the memories I had with Mike. Not all but mostly everything. I sat on the floor as I dragged the trash closer to my side in order to be able to dispose of the stuffs I wanted to more easily.

I opened the box and the first thing I found was my the hand made card Mike had given me when we had first started dating. I had thought it was really sweet and thoughtful, I still really think it is though. I dropped it down from the best as I continued to check the contents of the box. The next thing I came across was a picture of us on our first date, I had insisted we took the picture on that day. He was looking all fine in his well tailored outfit and I was looking chic in my dress. It was really an amazing night, I smiled as I remembered the night.

I picked out some other pictures of him as I cut them with a scissors throwing them into the trash and tears falling off my face. I wanted to stop the tears really because they were beginning to get to me too but I couldn't, I just couldn't. It wouldn't stop even if I tried.

I threw them in the trash and cut his pictures out of the once we were in together. I just couldn't bring myself to hold on to such memories because it didn't seem like he was doing the same.

I spent hours relieving memories of times that had passed with him. I always had the best time with him when we were out and it was always so sweet with him around and I loved every moment I spent with him regardless of everything.

I did nothing all day but sleep, cry, eat chocolates and check my phone to see if Mike had unblocked me from all his socials and everything. I wondered why he blocked me though. It seemed and he sounded like we had no issues whatsoever between us and that everything was okay regardless but then he blocked me.

I heard a knock on the door as I reluctantly woke up from my second round of sleep for the day. I figured mother and Grandma were back from the store.

"Come in" I said in a low tone

"Hey, I just wanted to check if you were okay or needed anything" mother said as she walked into my room.

"I am okay, thank you mum" I said and was about to go back to sleep when she spoke again.

"You found it" she said as she moved towards father's art that I had put on the wall. I had found a place for it beside my collage.

"Yes" I said as I sat up well on the bed and watched her admire the piece. She admired it like it was the first time she was seeing it. Like how sturned she had been the first time he showed it to her.

"He was exceptional" she said still looking at the art. "He loved this so much, I miss him, I miss seeing him paint, that smile on his face, the joy" she said, one could easily tell she was starting to remember all the times.

"I miss him too alot" I said

"He would be glad you put this up" mother said as she turned back to look at me.

"Yes" I replied.

"But I am sure he would be even more glad that you started painting again" mother continued.

"I don't know mum, it's been a long time" I said

"I know it has been a long time but this I what you love and we both know it. I remember when we bought you your first brush set, you wouldn't stop talking about it to eveeyone who cared to listen and show eveeyone" mother said, I smiles as I remembered that day.

"Rosie, I have something for you" father had said as he walked in the living room through the door and I had ran towards him from were in had been colouring my books.

"Here you go" he said as he handed over the brush set to me. I was excited and had immediately ran to meet mum in the kitchen excitedly to tell her.

"Mum! Mum! See what dad got me" I said smiling widly.

"It's beautiful" she said as she looked at dad with a smile.

I missed those days when that was all I cared about, a new brush set, a colouring book or a canvas.

"I remember" I said to mother with a smile.

"Then stop being afraid, unsure of what you love and go for it" mother said. "I know how much you love to do it and I know he would be really happy you didn't give up on it" she added.

Three days after and I was still as miserable as the first day it happened. I thought mother said time healed pain. Why was it taking so much time to get healed from this pain. I still did my regular routines like crying, eating and sleeping the day away.

I ate silently as I could feel the stare from mother and Grandma on me. I knew they were concerned about me and one could easily tell by how they asked me eveeytime of the day if I was okay and if I needed anything.

I think I want to start working at the shop" I suddenly said and the excitement on mother and grandmother's face was everything.

"Really?, Are you serious?" Mother asked excitedly.

"Yes" I said

"That's amazing Roseline" Grandmother said with a smile.

"But what about your job" mother asked.

"I will quit, it wasn't like I loves working there anyways" I said and it was true, I really didn't like working at the customer service work that I did. It was frustrating, always required alot of time and can be really annoying too.

"Alright then" mother said

"I will try to stop by today" I said

"That would be nice of you, I am so glad you're moving on from all of this" mother said but what she didn't know was that I hadn't moved on. I wasn't even better than the first day it had all happened. I just want to try to see if doing something else would make me feel better since being at home all alone wasn't helping me much.

Mother and Grandmother had wanted me to join the business for the longest time now and I was sure they would be both surprised and excited that it was finally happening.

There was a knock on the door after a while

"Someone is here to see you" mother said after she opened the door. And I knew that deep down I wished it was Mike coming telling me how much he wanted me back but maybe it was time that I started accepting the reality of things and maybe that would make me feel better.

It was Maria and Mary, they rushed into the house as they both pulled me into a hug. I still hadn't spoken to them since the incident and had only given one word replies when it was necessary to reply.

"We will leave you girls now, we need to get going" mother said as she and Grandma packed the stuffs they were carrying with them to the shop.

"Bye Aunty, Bye Grandma" Maria and Mary said in unison.

"Bye dears"

"Why would you not pick our calls" Maria said more worried about me than concern about the calls I wasn't picking.

"I am sorry" I said.

"You don't look good, you look like you haven't slept in days" Mary added.

"Maybe because I actually haven't been sleeping alot" I said

"You really have to get better , everyone is talking about you though" Mary suddenly said and Maria tapped her in a way to tell her not to say anything more. It felt like they didn't want me to know.

"What is it?" I asked as I narrowed my face at both Maria and Mary.

"It is nothing you need to worry about really" Maria assured but I really still wanted to know what it was as I could see the sneaky look both were giving to one another.

"Everyone is talking about you in town and they are calling you the abandoned bride" Mary suddenly said.

"Mary!!!" Maria exclaimed wondering why Mary had decided to tell me.

"She would have found out anyways" Mary said and then they both stared at me awaiting my response and reaction.

"What!!" I exclaimed "what are they saying about him though"? I asked hoping it wasn't only I who had a nickname now.

"Nothing" Maria said as she looked down a bit.

"They are saying you probably did something for him to leave" Mary added

"Mary!!" Maria exclaimed again.

"It's fine so, he does a bad thing and it is me who has a name and not him. Why can't they give him names like the runaway groom" I said dramatically as I waved my hands in the air. Like just something, anything" I thought.

"Don't let it get to you, a lot of people still blame him though and think he is horrible for leaving you that way" Maria said to make me feel better but it wasn't doing that. It was only making me feel worse and all.

Anyways, we came to ask you when you will be coming back to work" Maria asked

"I am not coming back" I suddenly said

"How!! Why??" Mary exclaimed confused

"Nothing, I just really feel I should help out in the family business more" I explained.

"But you didn't want to work there" Maria said

"Yes, but now it has changed, it isn't like I liked the customer service work more anyway. It was always filled with so much stress, trouble and I was so uninterested" I said as I thought of how I had even gotten the job in the first place.

I had wanted a job really badly to help mother and Grandma around the house and then Maria and Mary told me how there was a job opening at their place of work and it would be nice if I tried out. At first, it did not seem much as a trouble, it seemed okay and I was able to manage it since it at least paid my bills but then it became more demanding, more frustrating and now thinking about it. I didn't think that was what I wanted to do with my life.

"Are you sure about this though" Maria asked

"Yes I am, I feel I will be able to explore more options more and no what I really want to do and I also think I want to start painting again" I explained. I had decided about painting again since the last time I spoke to mother about it. The words she had said resonated well with me and thinking about how much I had missed it. I knew it was the right thing to do.

"Wow, that is amazing, your dad would be so proud" Mary said with a smile. They all knew dad's love for painting and he used to teach I and the girls how to paint when they came over for sleepovers too. But I was the only one who actually really took it as something I wanted to do.

"Yes right" I said