Forever, With Love

Chapter four

Ava

My phone was blowing up in my back pocket all night to the point if it were in the front by my crotch it would have felt like a damn vibrator. It was annoying as all hell and I knew Art was behind them, well most of them. I didn’t even bother looking at my phone. It was way too busy tonight to even think about it, way too busy. I told myself I wouldn't look at it until I got home, in my jammies and in bed. I didn’t want to read the endless number of messages from everyone until I was in the comfort of my warm bed, wrapped up in my fuzzy blanket with the window wide open so I could feel the breeze.

Normally after a long night like tonight, I would go to moms and sleep there since it was closer than my place but when I called her on break to tell her goodnight and to let her know I would be over after midnight, she told me she wasn’t going to be home because she had to take care of something and that the neighbor was going to let Snoop out as well as make sure he’s fed in the morning. All I could say was okay. There was no use in arguing with her at this point. So, home it was.

I kicked my shoes off and tossed my keys on the counter, not bothering to flip the lights on. My legs hurt, my arms hurt and my mouth hurts from all the smiling I was doing. Instead of going to my room, I plopped my ass on the couch and took my phone out. I was so tired and exhausted I almost couldn't keep my eyes open. So much for waiting until I was in bed to check my messages. I could get comfy here and just sleep, but first...my phone.

6:15 pm Art: Where the hell are you? I called work and Ollie said you weren’t there.

6:30 pm Art: Ava…seriously. I tried to call you. You have me worried. Please let me know you’re okay. We never even got to talk about the important stuff before you disappeared.

7:30 pm Art: If you don’t answer me I’m going to start looking for you. You can't avoid this forever.

8:00 pm Art: I went through every room in that hospital. Ava…

8:15 pm Sawyer: Why is Art blowing my phone up? He says he can’t find you and you were supposed to be at work…I’m confused. Call me?

9:30 pm Art: I’m about to go to everyone’s house and look for you. You know I'm crazy enough to do it.

10:00 pm Art: Please…Ava I want to talk. We never finished talking.

And there were so much more. I don’t understand why he can’t just let things be? It's obvious I'm not ready to spill my emotional and stressed guts to him anytime soon. Groaning and look at the clock, it read midnight. There was a fifty-fifty chance Sawyer was awake with Harper. I took the chance and called her only because she was the rational half of our duo.

“It’s about damn time I heard back from you. What happened today?” She said in a whisper.

“Let's not talk about me. Let's talk about you. Feeding my god daughter?”

“Avoidance has always been something you're good at." she laughed, "And yea, Finn’s been working really hard and he said he wanted to be up with her tonight but I wouldn’t let him. You need come over soon and spend time with the kids. They miss you."

"I will soon. I'll take the little ones so you and the hubby can go out on a long night or weekend or whatever." I smiled into the phone

"Thanks. I'm sure Finn will greatly appreciate that. Now, can you tell me why Art came barreling into all our houses looking for you like a crazed maniac?”

I let out a deep sigh, frustrated that he would do that to them, “All? That's extreme. I don’t know why. I left him a note saying I was going to be at work. I thought that would be enough. Apparently, it wasn't.”

“I have many questions.”

“I’m sure you do. Ask away.”

“He was at your house when you weren’t there?”

“Yeah…about that. Snoop dragged me over to him when we were running and well, he came over because he wanted to talk.”

“Did you finally tell him what you told me at the cabin?” she asked with a whisper.

“No. We actually didn’t talk about a lot.”

“Let me guess, you beat around the bush avoiding anything you didn’t want to talk about, right? And then you probably fell asleep.”

“Don’t act like you know me.” I glared into the darkness, “We fell asleep and when I woke up I got ready for work. I couldn’t wake him. He looked…peaceful and he had a smile on his face and it was…nice.”

“Okay…so you left him in your apartment and…”

“I went to work.” I shrugged to no one in particular.

“So…Art told us something interesting.” I froze. I hope he didn’t… “A couple of things really.”

“Why the suspense? It’s like you’re trying to make me nervous.” I laughed, trying to hide the fact that I am actually nervous.

“Well…he said you were off today but you said you were at work.” I imagined her c*****g her eyebrow at me in suspicion.

“Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes.” Is all I said. Because it’s true.

“Can you elaborate?”

“Nope.”

“Okay…and he said there were boxes in your place?” Damn it.

“There are.”

“I repeat me last question about elaborating.”

“Cleaning. I’m choosing to donate some things.” Technically, it's not a lie.

“To the point where your place is bare?”

“I’m trying to live a simple life.” I shrugged, “Hey, listen…I’m going to head to bed. I’m tired and I have to be up early.”

“You know I can tell when you're lying to me and I don't like it. We are not done with this conversation and you’re lucky Harper is asleep and I’m about to fall asleep in this damn rocking chair.”

“You are not the first one to say that…”

“Who else is falling asleep in the rocking chair?” I laughed and she laughed with me. “Ava…I love you. What ever is going on, please…just talk to someone, anyone and if you need, talk to me. You know I won’t say anything. I’m keeping your secret from high school and the one from college…I can keep more if you need to.”

“I just…need more time. I’ve been thinking…”

“That’s never a good thing.” She laughed.

“I think I want to fix things…with Art…but I'm scared.”

“Ava…don’t say that unless you mean it.” She said in a kind of threatening but caring tone, “You’ve been hurt more than you’re letting on. He also has had a terrible past from what I heard. How do you plan on fixing things?”

“I don’t know…”

“You need to be honest with him babe.”

“I can’t…not yet…”

“Then wait. Wait until you can be honest and then fix it. Until then, be friends.”

“I hate that word.” I mumbled.

“Think about what I said. You can't move forward with him until you're ready to talk to him about everything. So, ponder on that for a bit while you ponder about his man parts and your ladybits. Goodnight.” She sung laughing before hanging up the phone.

I shook my head, taking in what she was saying. She was right. I needed to fix myself and do what I needed to do before I fix things with him. I groaned to myself thinking about it. It's going to be harder than it looks, good thing for my appointment tomorrow.

Slipping off the couch, I dragged myself to my bedroom, rubbing my eyes, ready to strip my clothes off and head to bed and that’s exactly what I did after I went to the bathroom. I walked out after doing my nightly routine and shower, my fuzzy purple towel wrapped around my body, ready to change into my shorts and tank top and finally get some sleep. Four to five hours is better than none at this point. And as soon as I let my towel drop to the floor...

“Are you trying to kill me?” I heard a familiar, deep, sexy voice coming from the bed, making me scream and cover my chest up. The bedside lamp snapped on and Art was laying in my bed, shirt off, tattoos exposed, muscles asking me to touch them, eyes boring into my soul, never leaving mine.

“What the hell are you doing here?” I yelled, reaching down to grab the towel to hide my body from his eyes.

“Well, when you didn’t answer my messages, after running around town all damn night trying to find you and make sure you’re okay because you lied to me, I came back here after I picked up Lucas.” he shrugged before putting his hands behind his head and relaxing against the headboard.

“How did you even get in?” I raised my voice a bit more.

“Can you be quiet? He’s in the other room sleeping.” He rolled his eyes, “I took my old spare key.”

“Hey! You have no right to that key. I want it back.” I glared when I turned around so I could put some clothes on. Shirt? Check. Panties? Check. Before I could go to my dresser and grab shorts to put them on, I felt hands on my waist and a rock hard body behind me. He rubbed his hands until they just went under the hem, feeling his fingers right by my panty line, “What are you doing.” I whispered, ignoring the sparks dancing across my skin at his fingertips.

“You’re tense. How about I give you a massage?” he asked as his hands trailed to my lower back, his thumbs kneading the tense areas. It made me tilt my head back into his chest and let out a soft moan as he continued the relaxing circles.

“N…n…no.” I stuttered out trying to hold in more moans, “This is a very bad idea. Friends don't do this.”

“Lascia che ti aiuti a rilassarti.” He whispered.

“That’s not playing fair.” I said as I pulled away, “What does that even mean?”

He walked over to me, grabbed my hand and brought me to the bed, sitting us both down, “Let me help you relax.” He smiled, “I can help you in any way you need. A bath. A massage. Food. Sex.”

“The answer to all that is no.” But I so bad wanted to say yes, yes to everything, “Now, cover...that…” I said waving my hand over his chest, his glorious, muscular, tattooed chest that I just want to run my hands up and down and lick with my tongue, “and go in the spare with Lucas and go to sleep. And just to be clear the only reason why you’re staying the night is because Lucas is asleep.”

“What ever you say Bella.” He smiled, “My offer still stands.”

“Why are you even propositioning s*x right now? Don’t you have a fan girl or something, maybe an intern at work that can take care of your needs?”

“I could. By why would I entertain any other girl when there is already a woman out there that’s captured my heart.” he smirked, trying to be smooth. Hell, he didn't have to try, he already was.

“That's not very friend-ish to say. Now, out.” I smiled pointing at the door. He came over and when I thought he was going to push me on the bed, he cupped my face and kissed my forehead.

“Buona note Bellissima.” He whispered before leaving the room and shutting the door as I melted at his words. I hate him…my panties are freaken soaked. He said that every night we were together. It was one of the few that I memorized. ‘Good night beautiful.’

I turned back to my bed and crawled into bed, leaving my shirt on in case Lucas comes in here and wakes me up. No way I was having a five year old boy see my boobs. As my bed hit the pillow, I tossed and turned trying to get comfortable. The pillow smelled like him and I was all hot and bothered, seeing his muscles, his pecs, his giant chest tattoo, the way his hands felt on my skin as he rubbed circles on my lower back and the Italian…oh my gosh when he touches me and speaks Italian.

I let out a heavy sigh and opened my nightstand, reaching in and taking out one of my vibrators, one that I’m sure would darken Art’s eyes since he’s the one that got it for me. He loved to play and I loved having him play.

I slipped my panties off, trying to even my breathing, debating if I was going to do this with Art in the other room. I could just go to bed. There’s melatonin in the bathroom but then I wouldn’t wake up in time for my appointment tomorrow. Biting my lip, I turned it on, slowly inserting it inside me, feeling the massive vibration everywhere on my lower half, making me gasp as my one hand move it in and out, feeling it on my clit and g spot at the same time and the other hand trying to block my moans.

I closed my eyes, imagining him. His hands on my body. His lips on my n*****s. His tongue on my clit as he sucked and nipped. His large c**k pounding into me. The way I would ride him as he played with my ass at the same time. The way he made me scream his name every night we were together. The nights where he would gag my mouth to cover my screams and moans so we didn’t wake up Lucas. I moaned out his name under my breath over and over, wishing it was him and not this vibrator.

As I breathed faster, getting close to my end, I imagined the blanket get ripped off of me just as his name left my lips again. I snapped my eyes open to see him standing there, full hard on, c**k out as he stroked it. How loud was I? “Don’t stop.” He whispered. His eyes were dark as the moonlight enhanced his frame. His hand was moving on his manhood as I saw the trickle of precum leak from the tip. “Say my name again Bella. I want you to say who’s the one that makes you like this.” He groaned, his eyes not leaving mine.

I did what I was told, moaning his name as the vibrator hit that spot, making me arch my back as I watched him move his hand faster until he let out a small roar, the next thing I knew, he was grabbing my ankles and pulling me down to the edge of the bed. Damn, I loved it when he did that. He took out my vibrator and replaced it with three of his fingers while his thumb teased me, moving them in and out with force, curling them to that special spot. My eyes shot open, feeling him. God, he felt amazing.

It’s always better when he did it. As he fingered my dripping wet center, I reached down for his c**k, wanting to feel him. I wanted to feel the pulsating veins as I moved my hand up and down with a slight twist at the tip.

I knew in my head this was a bad idea. This opened doors that we previously shut but I didn’t care. A part of me wanted this. Not a part of me, all of me. I wanted him. I needed him in more ways than one and I was the one that was denying both of us what we wanted. All I needed to do was be honest with him.

“Don’t stop.” I moaned out, begging him at I felt myself tighten up, “Please…” I begged.

“Tell me what you want Ava. Tell me you want this.” He moaned next to my ear as I let go of his c**k. I pushed him off me, surprising him as I reached up and grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him down to me and slammed my lips into his.

Our lips danced as he licked my bottom lip, begging for permission. The kiss wasn’t sweet. It wasn’t soft. It was hard and just what we needed, telling us we both craved it as much as the other. I pulled him down so he was on top of me, our lips never leaving each other’s until he started to kiss down my neck. I felt him right there, his hard d**k was right by my throbbing core and I so bad wanted him to slip it in.

Out of nowhere, he stopped, his chest heaving up and down, sweat beading on his forehead like I know it was happening to me as well. I know it took everything he had in him to stop what he wanted to do, “If I do this Ava, if we go back to this, there' sno going back...there's no ending this. Once I make love to you again, I'm done for...” he whispered as he brought his hand and pushed aside the hair that was stuck to my face.

“But...”

“No buts. I'm not doing this just to get my heart broken again.I love you. You know that. You say you love me but I need to know you’re in this. No pushing me away. You and I, we’re in this for the long hall…” he whispered, bring his lips a bit closer to mine.

I looked up at his eyes and tried to see if anything he was saying was a lie. I’ve been hurt time and time again and I couldn’t handle it. If he were to walk away from me after we decided this I would lose myself. But I didn’t see that. I saw the sincerity as he begged with his eyes for an answer, a specific answer.

“What do you say Avalon Rose Patterson. What do you say? Are you in this with me?” He asked, linking his hand with mine, “You tell me no right now and I’ll walk away and we'll be friends. It will hurt like hell but I’ll do it if you want. But I want this…I want you and me…”

“How long?” my voice shook.

“Bella, if you say yes, I don’t plan to ever let you go.” He rubbed his nose with me and I did the only logical thing I could do at that moment, "So...what do you say beautiful?"

There’s no denying it. I can fight it all I want but the universe keeps bringing us together. Was this a sign that he was supposed to be here?

“Yes."

It was in that precise moment I felt a small weight on my shoulder lift and I could finally start breath. This is the man I love and if this was the last time this happens, then I will forever let the be seered into my memory.

“Are you sure?” he asked, his eyes glazing over.

“Only if you promise not to run from me...” I asked, holding his hand a bit tighter, “There's more to everything that you don't know and I need you...I need you Art.” I let the tears fall as he took his thumb and wiped them away.

“I’m here Bella. Are we still okay? Protection wise?” He asked. My eyes shifted a bit and I felt my ears get red. Thank goodness it’s dark otherwise he would see it.

“Yes. Always.” I whispered.

And with that, he shoved his c**k inside me all the way to the hilt, making us both moan out in ecstasy. He started moving his hips, faster, harder, shaking the bed as he held my hands in his. I wrapped my legs around him not letting him go, feeling every single glorious inch and taking in everything I could, fearing that this would end soon. Hearing his moans was music to my ears as we danced like we were never apart until I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Letting out a scream of his name, I clenched him as he did a final thrust, spilling everything he had inside me.

I felt his minty breath on my skin as his lips grazed my cheek and then my forehead as he slowly pulled out of me. Like he always did, he went to the bathroom and got a warm washcloth so we could clean up.

“Lay with me?” I asked him. His eyes shined as he did a side smile.

“Always.” He crawled in beside me, holding me to his chest as my head laid on the compass tattoo, my fingers trailing the outside of it, “Remember, you are my home Ava.” And with that, I closed my eyes and slept better than I have in the past few months.

I shot up from my bed, chest heaving, panting, my body was tingling as my hands trailed over all parts, looking for sighs of us having s*x. It felt like we did, the room smelled like him but he was in here before, but he isn’t here now. The room was still somewhat dark but you can see the sun start peering into the window. My clothes were still on. “Damn…it was a dream.” I mumbled, sitting up on my bed, placing my head in my hands. Why would I image all that? The s*x, yes, I believe it, but the words, the promises of togetherness and love...

It's because it's what I want. But I knew I couldn't take that path with him. He would never forgive me for ruining his future if I did.

The clock read seven am and as I walked to the bathroom, I heard giggling from the kitchen and froze, momentarily forgetting the boys were over. Slipping on pajama pants, I quietly walked my way into the living room where I saw the familiar blonde haired child and the sexy man standing at the stove in nothing but shorts.

“Ava!” Lucas yelled, turning to me and running into my arms. I picked him up as he wrapped his legs around me, smiling into his hold, feeling his little arms wrap around my neck, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too. What are you two doing here?” I asked as I placed him down.

“You don’t remember?” Art asked as he c****d his eyebrow, “We decided to have a sleep over.” He smile so innocently at me.

“I…wait…what?”

“Yeah. After you kicked me out of your room last night, we stayed here because it was too late and you said I could." He shrugged, "And well, this is a great excuse for us to eat breakfast and talk.” He smiled, flipping the pancake he had on the stove.

“It was a dream.” I mumbled to myself, "It was just a dream." But he heard me.

“What was?” He asked, giving me a soft but yet confusing smile.

"Nothing," I shook my head, "Well, let's eat and get on with our day. I have a busy morning and work later."

He smiled at me as he placed the plate of pancakes on the table for us “IDon't forget, you need to make some time for me." He winked and sat down so we could all eat together.

I knew he wasn't going to let the conversation go. Eventually we would have this talk but I was not mentally prepared for it and if I keep having dreams like I did last night, I knew eventually we would fall back into bed together.

Was I ready for that? No. But I don't think I have a choice...I never did when it came to him.