6- s*x no more
1515 Words
Andrew
“OMG. Are you THE Andrew Hudson?” a woman squeals next to me.
I curse under my breath.
This is the fourth one and I have been here for less than fifteen minutes.
This is why I am always late to meet my friends! Women tend to swarm around me but from a distance when I am with friends. But as soon as they see me alone, they leap at me, claws extended.
It is not that I don’t like the attention. I thrive on it. But I am the predator, not the prey. Singling a woman in the crowd, flirting with her, taking her to my suite… That’s foreplay for me!
“Sorry, we are late” James says as he pulls the chair for his wife, Harper.
“Hey, man! How are you?” Ethan says as he fists bump him, his other hand tightly wrapped around his wife’s waist.
“Look at you four arriving at the same time!” I tease them.
I stand up and kiss Harper and Sawyer, the women who stole my partner in crime.
“We carpooled.” Harper clarifies.
I gawk at my friends. They carpooled?
“You carpooled?” I ask, my eyes wide in disbelief.
“Yes, we did. Don’t make a thing out of it.” Ethan huffs.
“So suburbia of you.” I chortle, grinning smugly at my friends.
The three of us were the most sought-after bachelors in the city… We used to paint the town red every f*****g now… Look at them now… The perfect husbands, going on double dates and carpooling.
“We wanted to discuss a couple of touchy topics.” Sawyer explains, her face holding a sadness that I have not seen in her eyes for a couple of years now.
Ethan makes sure of it. The guy worships the ground she walks on and has made her so happy since they got together. He made it his mission to make her smile and laugh every day.
“And you can’t discuss them here? With me present?”
“Nothing to do with you, Mr. egomaniac! Calm down.” James grunts.
"Are you sure, Mr. friend ?" I mock him.
“Why did you choose this place, Andrew? Euphoria is always so crowded and loud.”
“Damn, the effect of your love knows no limits, Sawyer.” I tease her and Ethan. “ To think that a couple of years ago, Ethan used to party here every single night.” I grin as Ethan glares at me.
“You mean my husband had a life before me? That's outrageous!” Sawyer exclaims, her hand on her chest.
“f**k you, Andy.” Ethan grumbles.
I wince at the nickname… My dad calls me Andy and I hate it.
Below the belt Mr. Harrison… Below the belt!
“This is why he chose Euphoria for our get-together,” James says, pointing at my smug face. “To get a rise out of us.”
Busted!
“You make it so easy.” I laugh loudly.
“Not so fast, Andrew.” Sawyer warns me, sanctimoniously.
“What do you mean?”
“Next week is our turn to choose the restaurant for our night out.” She smiles smugly.
I frown, looking from Sawyer to her husband and then back to her.
“Dammit, Ethan! Your wife scares the bejesus out of me.” I grumble as they all laugh at me.
“So, what did you talk about?” I ask once everyone stopped laughing.
“He is not going to let it slide.” Ethan shrugs.
“It is Carl.” Sawyer says.
I sit up straight.
“What do you mean it’s Carl? What happened?”
“We don’t know yet. But he seems off lately.”
Does he? I saw him last weekend for his birthday party and he seemed fine.
Am I such a bad godfather that I did not even notice anything?
“Let me talk to him.”
“No! out of the question!” Ethan says.
“I am trying to help Ethan!”
“You will not sit down and talk with him. I know how this will go!”
I furrow my brows, not sure what he is insinuating.
“He meant: you will take him to a strip club.”
I open my mouth to protest, but his assumption is spot on.
“It could be an option to get him out of his funk.” I assert.
“Are you out of your mind!” Sawyer scolds me.
“Hear me out. if his problem is talking to women or performing, then this is the ideal solution to…”
“Stop talking, man! You are rambling and my wife is that close to punching you.”
“True story.” Sawyer grins as she rests her head on his shoulder.
“Please, just let me talk to him. I am his godfather after all. I need to be there for him in sickness and in health.
“This is for marriage, you idiot.” James laughs and they all follow suit.
“You know what I mean!” I reply dismissively.
I take my role as godfather very seriously. I regularly spend time with Carl. He is a great kid! I am ashamed that I did not notice anything in particular, but now that they have mentioned it, I will make sure to address this during our next outing.
“Andrew, Hi.” Someone calls for me.
I look up and see a brunette standing next to me. It takes me a few seconds to recognize her…Hannah? Anna? We had a fun night a month ago.
“I have not seen you since our hot night. Joan and I always talk about that amazing night. Maybe we can recreate it again?”
Yes, I remember it was one wild threesome… Yet, Hannah can promise my d**k a redo as much as she wants… He is not interested.
“Maybe another time.” I just tell her, a fake smile plastered on my face.
“Sure, baby! See you soon. Ta-ta.” She says.
“What is happening to you, Andrew?” Ethan asks, frowning.
“What?” I shrug my shoulders. “Tonight, is about us, here.” I say gesturing to our table.
“So… You are going to see her and her friend when we leave.”
“No. I doubt it.”
“What the f**k is happening, Andrew?” James asks, visibly worried.
Great… Just Great…
“Ok. Do you want to hear it? It has been three f*****g weeks since I last dipped my d**k. Here, I said it!”
Sawyer and Harper stare at me in disbelief. They sure did not expect that news!
James blinks repeatedly before clearing his throat.
“You mean you have a condition?” he finally asks.
“NO! What the f**k, James!”
“What did you expect me to think? You tell me you have not f****d anyone for three weeks now. That NEVER happened to you!”
“I know.” I groan, rubbing my hand on my face. “It's just that I am not interested in those women anymore. And I blame you!” I assert, my forefinger pointing at my four friends.
“Us? What have we done?!”
“You are all over each other’s, every f*****g time! Sunday brunches…Our get-together in a pub or a restaurant… wherever we go, you are whispering, giggling, and holding hands, and don’t get me started on the PDAs! You disgust me.” I scratched my nose.
They go all silent and I give them the time to process my bomb.
“You want that too!” Harper says softly.
“So. f*****g. Much.” I answer truthfully.
“OK. I get it. You want a relationship... But why are you here with us and not running after that girl?” Ethan asks.
“Are you out of your f*****g mind!” I scold him.
“Ethan!” Sawyer scolds him.
He rolls his eyes at Sawyer and me.
“I had fun with her. But it was just sex.”
“With her and her friend, from what I gathered.” James mocks me.
“How do you know that it starts and ends with s*x with her? Why don’t you try to get to know her.” Harper asks.
I shrug my shoulders, not sure what to reply. Hannah’s company is tolerable as long as she is moaning and climaxing riding my d**k. I can hardly stand her voice!
“Maybe next time you meet a woman that you find attractive, put s*x off the table…” Sawyer proposes.
“Are you crazy!” I say, shocked by her horrible proposal.
“Nope. Hundred percent serious.” She grins.
God… She has a plan… I can see it in her eyes… and I feel in my gut that I will not like it AT ALL!
- Writer
