Chapter 10: Deeper the Love, Deeper the Hatred
2866 Words
Ryuko flew into a frenzy, transformed and lunged at Nui with the intent to kill. Because of her rage, her attacks were easily telegraphed, and Nui deflected them all without much effort.
Ryuko: My dad told me once I found the person with the other half of my scissors, I'd find the person who killed him! f*****g hell, he was right! You were in my house that night, weren't you?!
Nui: Yep, I sure was!
Ryuko: Why'd you do it?! Why'd you kill my dad?!
Nui: Oh, come on, you know why.
Ryuko: Stop with the bullshit already!
(Y/N) was in his tower, looking at the fight with an unreadable expression on his face.
(Y/N): Gear Eyes is pulling a Naruto here. Only thing remaining is to transform into a monster and start a rampage.
Ryuko kept clashing with Nui, getting angrier by the second. (Y/N) noticed the red lines of her outfit started to bubble, as if her blood was literally boiling.
Ryuko: So the woman I saw that night was you?!
Nui: You got it! If I'd know a girl as cute as you was on her way, I would've stayed a little longer!
Ryuko: You b***h!
Nui: Do you think you can avenge your daddy with, that? Sorry, but that's not happening, girll!
Ryuko: THAT f*****g DOES IT!
Senketsu: Ryuko, stop! It's dangerous for your blood to get this hot! If you don't calm down, I won't be able to control myself!
Senketsu's Life Fibers became twisted together and blood gushed out of the red lines in the Kamui. Senketsu exploded into a monstrous form and consumed Ryuko. By this point it was literally raining blood. (Y/N) looked with wide eyes as Ryuko emerged from the pool of blood, but this time... he did not like the result.
Satsuki: No... Is that what you were after, Nui Harime? I'm going down there.
(Y/N): Me and my big f*****g mouth. That's not Kyubi Mode, that's full-on Juggernaut Drive! This is David Cronenberg level of nightmare fuel... *sigh* This woman is just a pain in the ass.
Berserk Ryuko then began destroying the arena with the goal of killing Nui, who was laughing and taunting her.
Satsuki had descended from her tower and walked towards Ryuko. The Elite Four were suddenly behind her.
Gamagori: Lady Satsuki, will you be alright?
Satsuki: Hmph. The voting grounds are a lost cause. You four are to evacuate the students.
Jakuzure: I had no idea that a Kamui could be this powerful.
Satsuki: I shall put an end to this.
She triggered her transformation, turning her outfit into the kinky s**t that a certain scheeming motherfucker loved to look at, particularily the rear. She was about to set out when said motherfucker appeared out of f*****g nowhere in front of her.
(Y/N): 'Sup Hardass, long time no see.
Satsuki: Now is not the time for your games, (Y/N).
(Y/N): b***h, take that statement back right no-... Okay, point taken...
Satsuki: If you understand the situation, step out of my way.
(Y/N): How 'bout I give you a better offer?
Satsuki: Make it fast.
(Y/N): I'm not one for quickies, chica. Let's tag team on this.
Satsuki: Tag team?
(Y/N): Clear the wax outta your ears, f*****g woman. Yeah, tag team, we'll stop Gear Eyes toge-.
He then turned his head to see the monstruous Ryuko still trying to hit Nui. She then emitted a bone-chilling screech while more blood gushed out of her.
(Y/N): Nope.
He then looked at Nui, who was laughing and taunting while dodging attacks.
(Y/N): That b***h however...
He then returned his gaze to the impatient Satsuki.
(Y/N): Uhhhh... How 'bout you stop Gear Eyes while I ki- I mean murde- I mean fight that b***h?
Satsuki: You wish to battle Nui Harime? Very well, but I warn you, do not underestimate her.
He flashed one of his crazy/trollish grins. It was one hell of a game face, I tell ya.
(Y/N): Oh, don't worry your fine ass over that, I'll be just fine.
He then disappeared in a blur of speed. Satsuki smirked a little at the last sentence, before shaking her head.
Satsuki: Although insane, his behavior is strangely calming.
Back at the fight, Ryuko was STILL trying to hit Nui, failing every time and destroying the arena. Nui STILL kept laughing and taunting and dodging. f**k, talk about Rule of Three.
Nui: Fantastic! It keeps getting more and more monstrous! That's what Life-Fiber's gotta be like!
She didn't notice an (F/C) blur rocketing towards her. Only when a yell came did she notice.
(Y/N): ANTI-ASSHOLE DROPKICK!
Nui raised her purple scissor just in time to block an incoming dropkick. (Y/N) jumped from the blade and stood between Ryuko and her.
(Y/N): Damn, next time I should try the Who The Hell Do You Think I Am Kick.
Nui: Huh? Who are you?
(Y/N): Just an average guy who likes to please his readers. And by looking at the comments in the last chapter, I believe they have made their decision. Prepare to die.
Nui: Oh? Are you Ryuko's friend?
(Y/N): It's more of a 'When are they going to f**k each other?' kind of relationship. But yeah, let's call it that.
Nui: That's perfect! That means killing you will make her even more gorgeous!
(Y/N) glanced at Ryuko, then at Nui.
(Y/N): You and I have very different concepts about beauty, Pigtail Psycho.
While he looked at Ryuko, Nui suddenly moved in her Slender Man manner and was behind him in a split-second. She then went to cut his neck.
Nui: *giggle* Then die!
(Y/N) suddenly raised his hand and deflected the blade. He then took Nui's arm...
Nui: Huh?
(Y/N): This b***h empty! YYYYEEEEEETTTT!
And threw her into the school. He then dashed at Ryuko and took her massive fist.
(Y/N): Oi, Author-kun, that came out wrong... Anyway, I Got The Best Wife In The Universe Swing!
He then threw her to Satsuki, who engaged her immediately. (Y/N) then looked at the school and charged in pursuit of Nui.
(Y/N): Rubber Chicken, prepare to engage target.
(Scene Break)
Honnouji Academy, Classroom 2-K
(Y/N) broke into the school through the windows and landed inside his classroom with no sign of Nui.
(Y/N): Hmmm... If I destroy this classroom, it means that there would be no classes... Then again, it will just be fixed by next chapter, cuz y'know, anime rules and s**t.
He looked around to see if he could spot Nui.
(Y/N): How the hell did I lose her? I mean look at her, she sticks out like a sore thumb!
He then noticed a something shiny on the ground.
(Y/N): Oh! A 10-yen coin!
He crouched down to take the coin, just in time to dodge a scissor blade that came with the intent of decapitation. He noticed this, rolled on the ground and stood up to face it's wielder.
(Y/N): Look at that, money DOES save lives.
Nui: *giggles* I didn't think a mere human would have this much strength! You just got a lot more interesting, handsome.
(Y/N): *shudder* Oi, do NOT call me that! Creeps the hell outta me and the readers!
Nui: Hmm? Readers?
(Y/N): You don't know 'bout 'em? I thought you did, cuz you''re a fourth wall breaker.... You have no idea what I'm talking 'bout, do ya?
Nui: Nope! Sure don't!
Oi, oi, why are these two talkin' like they're friends?! Get to the f*****g fighting!
(Y/N): Chill the f**k out, Author-kun, I got time to kill.
Nui: You're pretty weird, even for a naked ape.
(Y/N): That's the pot calling the kettle black, b***h. Anyway, why'd you kill Ryuko's dad?
Nui: *giggles* That doesn't matter to you, silly! You're about to die anyway!
(Y/N): Figured as much. *sigh* Kakatte koi, kono kuso onna.
Nui dashed at him and went for a stab to the chest. (Y/N) dodged and took one of the chairs that were in the classroom. He then raised the chair and got behind her.
Nui: Uh-oh...
(Y/N): OI, ROSES ARE BLUE!
SMASH
(Y/N): I GOT A f*****g CHAIR!
SMASH!
(Y/N): AND I'M ABOUT TO BEAT YOU TO DEATH WITH IT WITHOUT GIVIN' A SINGLE CARE!
SMASHHH!!!
Nui crashed into a wall and went though it, then another, then ano- you know the f*****g drill. This went until she stopped at the fifteenth one.
(Y/N): Sheesh, I don't think the Rubber Chicken's necessary for this...
Nui came out of nowhere, seemingly unharmed.
Nui: Goodness me! That was a pretty good attack! I felt that at my very core! Not only handsome, but strong too! It's the whole package! I might just keep you for myself!
(Y/N) processed this and his mind did an immediate 180.
(Y/N): Nope, nope, nope, nope, so much nope. All aboard the Nope Train to Nopeville. Rubber Chicken-chan's assistance is required.
He then reached behind his back under the curious gaze of Nui.
(Y/N): You should be honored, not many people have recieved the blessing to be struck down by the ultimate weapon.
Nui: Ultimate weapon?
(Y/N): Hmph, naive b***h. Behold, the weapon that has ended many omniversal wars with just a swing of it's mightiness. The weapon that's able causes crying babies to be struck silent. The one artifact that rivals the Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong Cannon. The only weapon that can be used to beat Chuck Norris.
This fucker really likes to hype himself up, doesn't he?
(Y/N): May the chicken overpower you! May the chicken hold you back! May the chicken conquer you! May the chicken frighten you! May the chicken shake you to the core! May the chicken hold you in check! May the chicken subject you! May the chicken cover you! May the mighty chicken fall on you! May you be held back from my body!
And now he's chanting s**t from the f*****g Necronomicon, go figure.
(Y/N): Make witness to the one and only... MOTHERFUCKING RUBBER CHICKEN!
MOTHERFUCKING RUBBER CHICKEN
Nui stood bamboozled by the sheer insanity of the situation.
Nui: ...A toy? You did all of that for a toy?!
(Y/N): Blasphemy! I shall smite thee in the name of the readers! And I shall regain my honor as an elite Thot Destroyer!
Nui: *sigh* And I thought you were a cute one. You're nothing but another human scum. It was fun while it lasted, but it's time to die, sweetheart!
Nui then lunged at (Y/N), who calmly stood like a baseball player and the Rubber Chicken was his bat. His mind triggered his Slow Motion state.
(Y/N): The thot nears the future destroyer. 2 outs, 2 strikes and 3 balls. Bases full.
Wait for it...
(Y/N): (L/N) prepares to banish the thot to BegoneThotville. It's all or nothing. He needs this grand slam for the Thot Patrol to win this battle. She's closing in.
Not yet...
(Y/N): He steels himself, his eyes firmly on his objective. His almighty Rubber Chicken at the ready.
Almost there...
(Y/N): He channels the strength of all Thot Slayers in existance, not unlike the Spirit Bomb. The thot enters striking range and...
NOW!
(Y/N): HE SWINGS!
(Scene Break)
Honnouji Academy, Courtyard
Back at the courtyard, Satsuki was clashing furiously with Ryuko. She then decided that enough was enough.
Satsuki: Ryuko Matoi! If you are not willing to regain your senses, you leave me no alternative!
Ryuko: GraAaAh!!!
Satsuki: So be it. A girl who is just being worn by her own Kamui is no match for me, Satsuki Kiryuin!
She then was engulfed in a pillar of blue light, channeling her power and preparing to finish the fight.
Ryuko did the same while emitting an unholy scream.
Satsuki: Here I come, Matoi.
She and Ryuko charged at each other. In canon, this would have been stopped by Mako. But this, my dear readers, is not f*****g canon.
BOOOOOOMMMMMMM
Satsuki and Ryuko stopped in their tracks to witness the event. A tremendous explosion engulfed half of the academy, even having a small mushroom cloud. A shockwave followed the explosion, blowing everyone back. The red clouds that encompassed the academy were gone.
Satsuki: (Y/N)...
From above the mushroom cloud, she could see a speck of pink going towards the distance. That was all she needed to see. She smirked a bit.
Satsuki: To best Nui Harime in combat. Now I remember why I chose him.
(Y/N): What are you smirking at, Eyebrows?
She darted her eyes behind her and saw her object of interest bearing one of his trademark crazy grins. He stood there like a proud soldier that had just won a battle for his country.
Satsuki: I am willing to bet that your side of the battle has gone smoothly.
(Y/N): *sarcastically* Oh really? What gave you that idea?
Satsuki: Still... did you really have to destroy half of the school?
(Y/N): Yep. Anime 101: If you want something to be awesome, add one of the following basic things: Dragons, Giant Mechs, Laser Beams, and Big f*****g Explosions. I've done three of those things, I need a f*****g dragon.
Satsuki: *sigh*...Nevertheless, I need to stop Matoi.
(Y/N): That's not necessary.
Satsuki: Hmm?
(Y/N): It's called 'Mako to the Rescue'.
Satsuki looked behind (Y/N) to see Mako literally slapping the monster out of Ryuko. Yeah, figure out how that works. Ryuko slowly transformed back to her usual self.
Ryuko: Mako...
Mako, unaware of this, kept slapping her. (Y/N) grew a proud/slightly sadistic grin.
(Y/N): Man, that girl is the Kagura to my Gintoki. Well Eyebrows, you just witnessed the power of Mako, you two would get along.
Satsuki: I doubt that.
(Y/N): You would be surprised. Opposites attract, you know. That gives me an idea...
Satsuki rolled her eyes and returned to her tower. (Y/N) noticed that she hadn't turned back to normal, and he took full advantage of this.
(Y/N): That's fifteen out of ten. Blake's got some serious competition, if you know what I'm sayin'.
(Y/N) walked towards Ryuko, who was very exhausted.
(Y/N): f*****g Scissor b***h, what the hell was that supposed to be?
Ryuko: Hey (Y/N).
(Y/N): Don't 'Hey (Y/N)' me. You almost killed yourself. I told ya I can't help you if you kill yourself.
Ryuko: Yeah, sorry about that. I'm also sorry that I dragged you along with my ramapage, Senketsu.
Senketsu: I'm just glad you're alright.
(Y/N): Talkin' to her f*****g clothes again...
Mako: Wah! Ryuko! I'm so glad you're alright!
Ryuko: Yeah...thanks...Mako... you too...(Y/N).
She then passed out from blood loss. (Y/N) sighed for the umpteenth time in this fic.
Mako: (Y/N)! (Y/N)!
(Y/N): Yes, I'm Kazu- I mean, I'm (Y/N), what is it?
Mako: I'm gonna take Ryuko to my house! She needs a blood transformation!
(Y/N): Uh, I think ya mean transfusion, chica.
Mako: Same thing!
(Y/N): Mmm-Hmm, sure is. Anyway, after you do that. Can you somethin' for me?
Mako: What is it?
(Y/N): Come to my house. And before the readers go 'FBI OPEN UP!' about this, I'm inviting you to play Smash Bros. Ultimate.
Mako: Oh! Sure thing! I'll go in a few days! Is anyone else going?
(Y/N) turned to look at the main tower and smirked, then turned back at her.
(Y/N): Oh yeah, you'll be surprised to see the other one.
Mako: Well, he or she must be pretty quirky if they know you.
(Y/N): Not bad, she's got potential.
Mako: Welp, I better get moving! See you later!
(Y/N) saw her run off with Ryuko in her arms. He then saw Mako's family in a small blue truck and took them to their house, but no without first waving at (Y/N). He waved back and soon he was standing alone in the arena.
(Y/N): Let's see if opposites really attract. This'll be an interesting experiment.
He then took out his Rubber Chicken and looked at it with a proud gaze.
(Y/N): You have exceeded my expectations yet again. I apologize for using your power against that Pigtail Psycho. My Thot Patrol rank has been restored, order has been restored.
He then took out his headphones and headed home.
(Y/N): *singing* Do the impossible, see the invisible. Row! Row! Fight the power!
He arrived a badass motherfucker, and emerged a badass thot destroyer. Roll the f*****g credits.
(Scene Break)
Honnouji Academy, Undestroyed side, Rooftop
Mikisugi, the blue motherfucker who has been absent in this previous chapters, was on the rooftop with a sniper rifle.
Mikisugi: He managed to destroy half of te academy, just like that.
Behind him was a certain mohawked bastard who only had an appearance in chapter 5.
Tsumugu: Forget destroying the school, he defeated REVOCS' Grand Couturier and came out unharmed.
Mikisugi: Yeah, he's dangerously powerful. It's a good thing he's on the good side.
Good side, yeah, let's go with that.
Mikisugi: Still, he is still an unknown factor in this whole conflict. And I think he will play a key role in the upcoming war, if he wasn't already.
Tsumugu: Unkown factor, eh?
He then looked at (Y/N)'s retreating form while thinking of something.
Tsumugu: That kid's a real piece of work. I wonder what was your relationship with him... Kinue.
- Writer
