forbidden desires

chapter 22

Ashley.

we'd made it another week and it was getting colder out. next week we're out for the start of Christmas and I have my final exams today. I'm just ready to get them over with.

we'd had alot of texting and Late night calls. he'd actually made it to my game last weekend and thankfully Jake didn't show up and his parents didn't talk to me. chase had come over before I had to leave bringing food. we just hung out until time to head out.

he'd been to the bar a couple nights and we'd share whatever food he ordered as I worked.

it was nice him going out of his way just to see me.

I felt wanted I felt needed. sighing as I walked through the halls when someone called my name. it was my professor

" yes?" I asked worried I had forgotten something.

he motioned for me to come here so I did. then a guy with some winter Lillie's was standing beside him and I was confused surely Jake wasn't back right this again. the last time times it'd just been plain roses.

" I believe he's looking for you. whoever they are from has good taste."

I nodded taking them thanking the both of them.

I looked and saw a card and smiled when I saw a hand written note from Chase in his messy writing.

- I know roses are a no. so I thought maybe Lillie's? either way I hope they brightened your day of exams I know you rocked them. xoxo chase.-

I smiled like an i***t smelliest them.

going to my car I sent him a message.

me- Lillie's are absolutely beautiful. how'd you guess that one? thank you but you really didn't have to.

I knew he was still at work but he still replied.

chase - I may have asked your aunt. ( wink face)

my aunt? he asked my aunt my favorite flower surely she's going to be wanting to know why he wanted to know such information.

me- my aunt?

chase- yes your aunt.

me-as in you asked my aunt my favourite flower? how did you explain that?

chase - I told her how I felt about you Ashley. it's no secret this time. I'm going to win your heart and when I do I will scream it to the world.

I blushed shaking my head.

me - and how did she feel about this

Chase - ( laughing face) positive there was talk about cutting certain parts of me off if I didn't treat you right. but over all she didn't seem to mind. you don't mind do you?

I sighed. I mean it was nice not having to be a secret if we decided to actually date.

me-I don't mind I just didn't expect it I guess considering I'm still working on myself and you can drop this anytime it gets to be to much.

chase - I'm here for the long haul doll. stop over thinking and just let me enjoy you. please.

I wiped a tear. just let him enjoy me. that's all this man is asking for.

me- I'm really trying.

chase- and I'll continue to be here while you do. enjoy your afternoon I'm going to piss some teens off with a quiz.

I let out a laugh.

I was sitting at home just watching some TV when Ann called. she let me know she has having a party and had invited me. she told me it was at her parents house and it was just a few people from cheer and the football team. I told her I'd let her know, I sat there thinking about it. I didn't have anything else to do and she said it was just a few people so that meant it wouldn't be insane I think that's the reason I'm not a fan of the other parties they make my anxiety go crazy.

the thought crossed my mind that chase would be upset, but I'm also working on not letting someone control me so I sent him a message letting him know I was planning on going and his only reply was to not drink to much and drive. and to call him if I needed anything.

I took a shower, doing my hair and make up and I was sitting on my sink in my robe I sighed would he think it was stupid if I invited him? I mean it just sounds like friends hanging out and he's my friend and I'd like to be able to hang out with him with other people.

I licked my phone up calling him and it rang for a minute

chase- hey gorgeous I wasn't expecting a call so soon.

me-sorry I was just getting ready and wondered if maybe you wanted to come along? I don't really want to do alone and I mean you said we could do things together and this sound alike friends hanging out so I just thought maybe. but I completely understand if you don't want to hang out at a college party.

I blabbered out in one breath nervous.

he chuckled

chase - I'll be over to pick you up in a few doll.

me-I don't want you to feel like you have to.

chase-ash. we talked about this.

I sighed.

me- okay just let yourself in while I finish up.

we hung up and I finished up. I don't know why I hate asking him to do things with me I just feel like he's going to get tired of me or get upset that I'm going out. I shake my head looking over my big hair. I did my make up s little darker since it's a party or whatever. and I went and pulled on my black skinny jeans and a dark red sweater.

looking over myself in the mirror happy with how I look

" absolutely stunning"

I jump from his voice turning to find him leaning against my doorframe. a sweatshirt and jeans with boots with his cap on. his style has changed s little since moving out of the city and it looks good on him.

he smirked at me checking him out.

" you ready? or wanna drool some more"

I rolled my eyes at him flipping him off as he chuckled.

" there she is."

he placed a small kiss on my cheek squeezing my hips

" damnit doll you look fantastic"

I blushed again

" well let's go and see what this is about I guess"

he chuckled taking my hand

" it's hanging out with friends not war"

I shrugged

" I just hope it's a small get together like she said. to many people and things get stupid. he nodded agreeing.

we'd made it to the address she'd sent me and her parents house was massive. I guess j was surprised because she want super snobby and about the only other cheerleader I considered a friend.

he helped me out the car and took my hand squeezing it letting me know he was there.

there weren't many cars so that was a good sign.

when we rounded the back yard where she said they'd be Bryan saw us first he came and hugged me and shook chases hand. I could tell he was already a little tipsy.

" so I don't have your number so I couldn't text and give you a heads up"

I looked at him confused and he nodded behind him and I looked my eyes landing on Jake with zoe another cheerleader in his lap. she absolutely hated me. she was wearing a very tiny skirt with a right long sleeve sitting on his lap as they made out.

" it's fine. it really isn't like you could make him leave"

he looked down almost ashamed

" I know but I know he's an ass and I'm just sorry. he's apparently hooking up with zoe or something. I don't even really know."

I shrugged it didn't bother me he was with another girl I just hoped he'd stay away from me tonight.

" well chase it's nice to meet you. I hope you are better for her than he was"

chase looked at him confused

" this is Jake's little brother"

chases nodded understanding

" well I guess I should thank you for giving her a heads up on his crazy ideas"

Bryan chuckled

" yeah I knew she was to sweet to be sucked into all that. even if she refused my advances also"

he winked at me and I shook my head

" I've already told you I don't do one night stands"

he shrugged

" worth a shot"

we shared a laugh as Ann walked up

" hey girl! I had no idea there was bad blood between y'all until Bryan told me and Zoe well she over heard my plans earlier so I didn't want to be rude when she asked to come and bring a friend"

I smiled at her

" it's okay really guys I want explode being in the same area as him"

they laughed and chase squeezed my hand. honestly I'm so glad I invited him because if Jake does try to talk to me at least I won't be alone.

Ann took us inside showing us where the drinks were and we made us one chase only having a beer before we made our way back out to the fire.

everyone was just chatting and having a good time. a few other cheerleaders we're here and some of the football team.

we were standing around talking with Ann when Jake finally came up for air I guess and noticed I was here. we were some what close to the chair he was in and he hollered over

" I see you went back to the ex"

I rolled my eyes ignoring him

" oh come one don't be like that you two. how are my sloppy seconds chase? it was chase wasn't it?"

I squeezed chases hand I could feel him starting to get irritated

" considering I had her first I'd say you were the one with the sloppy seconds" chase shot back

Jake stood up now and chase was much bigger than he was j never realized it before now. he basically pushed Zoe out of his lap making her stumble.

" you know we haven't even had a chance to actually talk Ashley you just completely ignored me"

I sighed

" I didn't have anything else to say"

he scoffed

" I tried to give you everything. and you were ungrateful "

I felt the tears in my eyes but I refused to let them fall

" I wasn't ungrateful for wanting to live my own life Jake."

I finally found my voice.

" oh my God with that damn bakery again really? if it's that important whatever you can work in it. just stop with be stupid games."

I shook my head

" it wasn't just the bakery you didn't listen to anything I said it needed. you didn't care about me the way I know I should be cared for"

he looked at me confused and Zoe was trying to get his attention but he shrugged her off

" what she means is falling asleep right after s*x. not caring for her needs in the bedroom Jake. she is a woman not just a s*x toy to bring out when you need it. I've kept my mouth shut trying to keep the peace but you should've treated her so much better than you did. you need to man up and realize you won't keep a good woman without actually caring for her"

chase had taken a step forward in his rant and I knew he was anger I could see his back tense as he talked about it.

Jake scoffed

" oh please she got everything she needed and didn't complain until she started hanging out with you and her family again "

I shook my head because that wasn't true. I'd tried twice to talk to him but he never listened.

" either way it doesn't matter anymore guys what's done is done "

I said grabbing chases hand trying to get him to come back

" just leave her be Jake clearly she wasn't woman enough for you "

Zoe purred and I rolled my eyes she'd be very disappointed at the end of the night but I'll let her figure that out.

" you know I could've given you everything. call me when you realize that"

I just pulled chases hand tugging him to follow me and after a minute of staring him down he finally did.

we found an area with no one and I let the tears fall.

chase.

God he was such a douchebag. begging for her back with a chick dressed like a slut right beside him he already had his plans for tonight but still couldn't leave her alone. I couldn't hold my tongue any longer I had to say my peace even though he didn't swing on me like I'd hoped I felt a little better.

once we were away from everyone I saw she was crying and that worried me I pulled her face in my hands wiping her tears

" hey doll what's the matter?"

she shook her head laughing

" I can't believe I was so stupid. I just feel so stupid"

I chuckled

" baby girl your met my ex. sometimes we have bad relationships it isn't the end of the world and it doesn't mean your stupid. I'm just happy you can see you deserve so much better than what he was giving you. f**k I may not even be good enough for you"

she giggled kissing my lips softly

" thank you. thank you for standing up for me. thank you for being by my side through all of this while I work on myself."

I smiled down at her hugging her

" I will always be here. always"

after the excitement of the night we didn't let it bring us down. she had a couple drinks and was feeling pretty good. her and Ann danced to a few songs and I talked with a few of the other players, they were surprised I'd actually played for the same college before my injury.

" so she's like single right?"

Matt asked and Bryan punched his arm and I chuckled.

" technically yes. but really no. she's mine when she is finally ready for me. if she decides I'm good enough"

he finished his beer winking at me

" good luck we've all tried to get her and she's turned us all down"

I laughed shaking my head.

as he walked over I'm assuming asking her to dance I watched her hesitant and lock eyes with me I just shrugged. it was a fast song it wouldn't hurt her to dance with him, and as long as he kept his hands where they belong we wouldn't have any problems. she finally agreed and he fist pumped the air making her laugh.

I say back enjoying my beer as they danced

" you know he is gonna ask her out right?"

Bryan said beside me and I chuckled

" I'm aware."

he looked at me raising his brow

" she's as loyal as they come. we may not be together together but she still wouldn't accept his offer"

he chuckled

" you seem confident"

I nodded drinking my beer

" she needs to live and she isn't hurting anyone. let her have fun because I'll be the one to drive her home tonight"

he shook his head confused. and I just shrugged. I trust my girl. I know she has feelings for me even if we haven't made things official.

I waited for them to finish and I went over

" my turn bud"

he sighed but let her go and she came into my arms mine resting on her waist and hers resting on my chest.

as a slow song started. I swayed us slowly around the fire

" he says it isn't fair you came claim over me"

I chuckled

" you aren't a toy. but you are mine"

she smiled at me nodding

" I'm glad you know I'm not a toy "

I leaned into her ear whispering

" doesn't mean I don't like playing with you. I know exactly how to make you do what I want without even saying a word"

I felt her body shiver as I placed a kiss behind her ear.

" that isn't nice"

she whispered putting her head on my chest

I chuckled

" oh doll we both know it's true"

I hummed the song as it played until it was over then I spun her big dipping her back kissing her lips lightly

" I'm going to get a drink "

she was flushed and I smirked at her

" hurry back"

she only nodded and made her way inside. I sat back down watching the fire.

she was taking a while so I started to get worried and made my way to check on her. I found her standing in the kitchen with Jake and his girl.

they hadn't seen me yet so I listened to the conversation

" are you serious right now? your girlfriend is right beside you and you are asking for me back"

" she isn't my girlfriend we're just hanging out right Zoe"

I heard the girl scoff

" Jake stop begging her back if you want in my bed tonight "

" I'm not f*****g begging! whatever Ashley you will come crawling back"

and with that I heard a different door slam

" stay away from him he's mine"

the Zoe girl hissed and I heard ash laugh

" trust me I don't want him he's all yours"

with that I heard the girls heels hitting the floor hard. she was pissed.

I walked around the corner to find Ashley with her phone.

" well I'd ask if you needed help but you handled that well. I'm proud of you"

she smiled up at me from her phone.

" I'm done letting him walk all over me"

I pulled her back to my front

" I am so happy to hear that doll"

she sighed

" I don't think I'd be here without you"

I kissed her cheek

" it's always been in you trust me you just lost it there for a minute "

she nodded

" never again "

I squeezed her

" never again."

she turned smiling at me her face flushed from alcohol

" Ellie is staying tomorrow and I think we're going Christmas shopping"

I smiled

" well you two stay out of trouble "

she giggled

" never"

Ashley.

I was happy how my night ended. even if Jake was an ass. and Zoe basically warned me to stay away from her man. I had to laugh at that because no way in hell am I doing that again. I'm starting to find myself again and I definitely don't want to lose it he isn't worth that.

I had a few shots with Ann and we danced some more before I was ready to call it a night. chase was gentleman and walked me to my door. kissing me sweetly goodnight before he headed to his place. I wanted to ask him to stay but I knew if he did he wouldn't give me what I was wanting. not tonight not while I was tipsy and honestly I'm greatful for that. I want to remember every moment of our first time together.

I crawled into bed happy with myself for standing up to Jake and happy that I think I'm finally heading into a relationship that will make me happy in both the bedroom and I already know he makes me happy outside the bedroom. watching him tonight chat with the guys even though they were younger he smiled and seemed happy. he let Matt dance with me and flirt without flipping out or accusing me of anything. Jake has gotten to where he'd make comments of me flirting to much at work for tips even though there towards the end be wasn't even coming to see me anymore at work.

I think he was just working his way up to telling me I needed to quit I see that now. I let out a sigh cuddling into my bed in chases shirt. I think he's the one for me and I think it's time I tell him i'm ready to try to actually date actually out a lable on what we've been doing besides friends.