forbidden desires

chapter 4

coach black.

Monday morning rolled around and all day I couldn't stop thinking about texting Ashley, like a teen myself. but I didn't and she didn't say anything to me. I knew it was for the best I didn't need to get caught up in this, whatever this was.

I fixed up a few things around the house got the laundry done and graded some papers. Ellie did come visit and she was nervous at first but I finally got her to talk to me, she was worried I was letting Macy back in and honestly that hurt me that my own ex girlfriend had hurt her so much. none of us parted on good terms. after the break up Macy was upset yeah and told me I'd be back but when I had to tell her I was leaving town she said some pretty nasty things about El and myself.

I let her know that that wasn't happening I was happy with where I was and Macy would never get caught dead living in this little town so she had nothing to worry about.

she told me about a few friends she'd made her own age in her own classes and that did make me happy that she wasn't just depending on Ashley. she did bring up the Timmy boy but only saying he was a year older and she thinks he may have the same thing she does but she hasn't asked him out right. but her being curious didn't sit well with me, my sister is to young to date.

I knew I'd have Ashley this morning the way the schedule had fallen and kids had started filling in the seats as I went over the things I needed to, I some what listened to some of their drama and some talking about their parties of the weekend. normal stuff. It was almost time for the bell to ring when Zack walked in without Ashley and I looked towards the door to find her stuffing her face yet again, when she saw me she blushed holdings up her burrito as to show me she was finishing and I had to hold back a chuckle. I just sent her a wink to let her know I knew she was here she slowly nodded in return and I wanted to kick myself. a wink. really? she finished just in time to come in and take her seat.

after going over things and passing out the work I got my phone out

me- okay I've got to know what's so good you've gotta finish in the hall.

I watched her as she took her phone out and set it under her desk on her lap, she looked up her cheeks had a slight pink to them as she shook her head

Ashley - oh so I can't eat in class but I can text?

I almost laughed at her smartass but held it back and send her a glare

me - nope that's frowned upon also.

when I she looked up from reading it she had a smile that matched mine.

Ashley - it's a breakfast burrito. my aunt makes them so I can grab and go, I did some tumbling this morning.

I raised a brow at her and she shrugged

me - maybe bring the teacher one and you wouldn't have to stand in the hall to eat.

Ashley - now that might be a good idea, bribing to get what I want.

I looked smiling but only to find Zack whispering something in her ear before she went back to her work.

me - don't think of it as bribing. just feeding the hungry.

we texted a little back and forth before I knew it the bell ess ringing. as all the kids made their way out she hugged Zack at the door and walked away without a glance my way.

the next period started filling in and about half way through my phone light went off saying I had a text

Ashley - think a breakfast burrito will soften Mr Carlos up?

I had to fight a chuckle, I'd met him he was a tough teacher older teacher set in his ways.

me- I think that one might be a lost cause.

Ashley- yeah me too. any good at Spanish?

me - I am not helping you chest

Ashley- ( eye roll emoji) I wasn't asking that I'm gonna need a tutor if I'm gonna keep my straight A's

me-you are rather determined aren't you? most would just take passing.

Ashley - I like that As thank you very much.

me- well I may know a little

Ashley - sounds like I found a tutor

shaking my head I knew I needed to stop this back and forth but so far it was innocent and it wasn't hurting either of us, what would it hurt if I helped her a little in Spanish

the rest of the day we shot a few back and forth and at practice I couldn't help but look down the field and see her doing her thing. she was obviously captain and the girls respected her, she would say something and they'd all do it.

she did a few tricks here and there.

I had the guys running a new play and they seemed to pick up in it nicely, after stretching out a called practice. telling them to hit the showers not before hearing a conversation from Regan again about how this weekend he was definitely getting Ashley in bed. I shook my head and headed to my office to finish up paperwork.

walking out I found her again running the track, well finishing so I walked over and grabbed her water as she pulled her head phones out panting.

damn the girl has got to wear something other than a sports bra when she runs.

" thank you"

she breathed out after chugging some

" what's with the running?"

she shrugged her shoulders

" clears my head"

I nodded

" well I don't want to over step or anything but I have to say I overheard a conversation.

that got her attention as she was bent over grabbing her things, she straightened up and looks at me dead in the eyes and I was greatful I had sun glasses covering mine so she couldn't see how I was eyeing her.

" someone on my team seems to believe he's getting lucky after the game Friday "

she rolled her eyes

" Regan?"

I was shocked to say the least and she laughed turning to head towards the gate

" trust me it isn't anything new. if you ask a few people I'm lesbian because apparently he has told a few guys that since I refuse to give him the time of day. I mean dude has slept with half our school and the town over all while he's supposed to have a girlfriend. I can guarantee that isn't how I want to spend 2.5 seconds of my life"

I laughed I mean I almost fell over laughing and she stopped and laughed lightly with me.

" well I'm glad you know and it isn't something you are going to be blindsided by"

rounding the parking lot she sighed shrugging.

"I know my worth and it isn't in the backseat of his truck"

nodding I felt proud, proud she didn't give in to this and proud she was saying she knew her own worth.

" can I drive today?"

I was thrown off for a moment until I realized we were in front of my truck

I laughed again" absolutely not sweet cheeks"

she rolled her eyes at me

" see ya later coach I've gotta go study"

and with that she turned to leave

that evening sitting on my couch trying to watch TV to get her off my mind I just couldn't

we hadn't texted since last period and I didn't want to keep bothering her or keep putting myself in her life. this wasn't right and I knew it.

running my hand down my face my phone chimes and I was sure it was mama checking in, she'd check in on me more now since Macy popped up until she understands I'm not going back to that relationship. but to my surprise it was Ashley

Ashley - so what does coach do after school? grading papers? because I'm positive I got an A

I had to laugh. I had done that and she in fact made an A not out of favoritism but she actually did the work.

me- actually yes I did do that. now I'm just watching TV. what about you finish your work?

Ashley - yeah didn't have much and no work today and Zack left going into work so now I'm just being lazy.

Zack kid always seems to be around that's for sure.

me - nothing wrong with that. reading?

Ashley - yes actually. do you like to read?

me-if it's a good book but not anything lately.

Ashley - yeah it's always hard to find one that makes you want to finish it.

me-care to share the book you read the other day?

there was a pause before she texted back this time and I wasn't sure if it was because I was asking about the book or she was just busy

Ashley - you aren't going to give that up are you?

me-probably not ( wink face)

damn it why'd I send that?!

Ashley - ( laughing face)

Ashley- ( name of app and book). I swear if you judge me I'm blocking your number.

me- why would I judge you on a book?

Ashley - it isn't everyone's cup of tea. let's just say a friend told me about them and now I enjoy reading them every now and then.

I downloaded the app and looked for the book. the cover was a guy and a girl kissing. what's wrong with a romance novel?

me - I won't judge. but honestly looks like a romance to me. probably won't even read it all those aren't my cup of tea.

Ashley - ( laughing face)

I didn't reply and started reading. I got a couple chapters in about a girl in college trying to pay her way by stripping when a billionaire came in and offered her a free ride just to be with him.

so far wasn't anything crazy. that was until I got to the next chapter. f**k me I didn't need to know she read these things or even thought about these things. these words were like porn on paper!

I finished the chapter and closed out the app.

I don't know what to think. I first thought she was b***h then she showed me she was actually nice to Ellie. but now now that I know she reads things like this how am I supposed to look her in the eyes because I've been having a hard enough time doing that!

I got up and started myself some dinner.

Ashley.

my day had been good. I was shocked he'd texted me and it went on all day, like we were friends just talking.

I had wanted to text him yesterday but I didn't know what to even say I mean he's my teacher I shouldn't be texting him but there's something about him that pulls me in.

when he told me about Regan he seemed pissed and concerned but this wasn't new to me Regan's been playing the same game for years now.

since I didn't have work today I just went home and did my school work before Zack brought me some dinner from his house, my aunt is out of town at a conference I could've cooked myself dinner but he showed up before I had the chance. his family always watches out for me when auntie is gone.

he hung out for a few and then had to leave. I was upstairs reading and I couldn't get him out of my mind. so I took the chance and texted him.

to my surprise he actually texted back, I don't know why I told him about the smut I read sometime. it's like my own dirty little secret, Alex introduced me to it when she told me I needed to be able to free my mind from serious things since I wasn't getting laid. she's had a few hook ups but none of them stuck , but she says I'm missing out on that in my life. and reading the books I believe it. but then again am I really to believe that a man would actually worship my body that way? because I've seen people at parties go off and hook up and an hour later walk back out like nothing ever happened. so I just stick to my stories because it's safer than being let down. my parents have done enough of that for me.

after I told him I couldn't help but laugh out loud when he said he didn't like romance books boy is he in for a surprise. in that one he bend her over and takes her in an elevator for the first time.

when he didn't reply I got nervous because I figured he was reading it.

then it was getting later and he still hasn't replied so now I was sitting her biting my nails thinking I'd made the wrong choice I don't know what made me tell him, I guess I felt he was older so he wouldn't freak but maybe I over stepped he is my teacher after all and now he thinks I'm some s****l pervert!

I had to get up and move around, I started some laundry and cleaned up the kitchen before setting my things out for tomorrow. then I showered and got in bed trying to sleep but the shame of him knowing this about me kept me up.

I finally drifted off at some point because I woke up to my alarm and I groaned not having enough sleep. today I'd be going straight to school and then practice then work.

I looked at my phone and he still hasn't said anything so I just got up and got myself ready in simple shorts and a school tee with my hair down and light make up to cover my tires face.

I was thankful I didn't have to go sit in his class today and I'd do my best not to run into him. definitely.

Zack noticed I was tired and of course thought it was because I was home alone and offered to stay the night tonight. his parents and my aunt don't mind if they trust us so I took him up on his offer. maybe hanging out with him would clear my head.

after practice today I did a light work out but ended it a little earlier since I was tired and still needed to get to work.

thankfully since I left early I didn't run into coach after I saw his truck still in the parking lot.

I had avoiding him all day so now I'll have to face him tomorrow.

work dragged but I was happy to be home I just wanted to go straight to sleep but Zack pulled up right after me reminding me he was sleeping over.

he had brought take out and we sat on the couch eating

" you could've called you know I would've came"

I gave him a greatful smile

" I know just didn't want to be a bother."

he kissed my cheek as he got up to throw our trash away

" you are never a bother babe"

my phone vibrated and I figured it was my aunt

but to my surprise it was coach

cb- well I have to say I'm surprised, I'd never thought in a million years id read a love story but I just finished it. wasn't half bad.

really? after going radio silent he acts like it's nothing??

me- thought you ran away..

cb- I won't lie and say I wasn't shocked when I first started reading it. definitely isn't something I'd pictured you laying around reading but everyone is different.

my face blushed at the fact he said he'd pictured me readily.

me-yeah well it's not really a known thing about me

cb- don't worry your dirty little secret is safe with me. ( wink face)

my face blushes red and Zack scares the crap out of me sitting back down

" everything okay?"

he asks since I jumped in laughed it off

" yes just overly tired"

he nodded in understanding as we both cuddled into the couch finding a movie

me- I appreciate it.

cb- you looked tired today everything okay?

great he saw me trying to avoid him

me- gee thanks that's just what a girl likes to hear

cb- didn't mean it in a bad way. your smile wasn't as big today

how does he notice something so small??

my heart flutters

me-I just didn't sleep well. kind of thought you thought I was a s****l perv now.

but Zack thinks it's because my aunt is out of town so he's staying tonight.

cb-he's staying the night with you alone??

" hey I'm gonna grab a shower you need anything before I do?"

Zacks voice breaks me from my little world and I give him a smile

" no thanks I'm fine"

he heads off to shower and I'm gonna to after him so I can crash soon.

me- yeah isn't the first time. he normally does when my aunt is out of town so I'm not alone.

cb-I'm not sure how I feel about this..

why would he even care? I mean it isn't like he's responsible for me.

me-well I don't think you have a say..

cb-I guess you are right. don't get knocked up.

okay that was rude. and uncalled for!

me-that was really uncalled for. and if you must know he sleep in the guest room.

cb- sure. I've gotta get some things done. bye.

I don't reply after that because he has no right to be rude to me! I didn't even do anything wrong and my aunt knows Zack is here so I don't know what the big deal is