Make me fall in love

Cindy's love

THIRD-PERSON

Jennifer walks behind Cindy as she keeps on trying to make her friend stop. Even though Cindy wanted to stop and talk about it, she couldn't stop her legs from moving, it's stronger than her, she wanted to put some distance between her and what had happened a few minutes ago.

"Cindy, come on, my feet are starting to hurt." Jennifer said loud enough for  her to hear. With a sigh, Cindy sat down on the pavement and waited for Jennifer to sit next to her. Jennifer was wearing tight jeans whereas Cindy has white shorts. If her mother is here, she would scold her for various reasons that went beyond Cindy's imagination. Her mother is the kind of person who is always bothered by everything and everyone, mostly by Cindy. There is nothing Cindy could do that doesn't annoy her mother.

for instance,"cindy, you should dress better, to show more your feminine side', 'Cindy, party host don't just run away from their parties, what will people say!?', 'Cindy, why do you always have to act so weird?', sit up straight', 'Cindy, stop fidgeting',

Cindy was so used to doing everything wrong that it wasn't a surprise when she made a mistake.

"She kissed me and I ran away." Cindy told Jennifer. Jennifer knew who 'she' was, given that Jennifer read Max's text messages with the girl. Jennifer tried to act as normal as she could, she didn't want Cindy to get hurt.

"It wasn't me, Jenny, it was her and it scared me so I ran away."

"Well, did you like it?" Jennifer asked Cindy, trying to be as careful as she could, she didn't want to put pressure on Cindy in case she didn't want to talk about it.

"I... I don't know?" She shrugged as she hugged herself. Jennifer wanted to hug her so tightly. They are like sisters, they has a bond nobody could break.

"It was over too quickly, I was nervous, it was my first kiss." Cindy spoke.

"But she kissed you." Jennifer said.

"Yeah but-" Cindy answers a bit frustrated, but before she could carry on, they're interrupted by Sandra, one of their close friends.

"What's wrong?" Sandra asked trying to catch her breath with the walk c*m running. She sat down next to Cindy, throwing he hand over Cindy's shoulder.

"Cindy just had her first kiss." Jennifer said once she saw that Max couldn't really say it. There is no secret between them, they aren't just friends, they are a family. Jennifer, Cindy, Sandra, Nick, Elliott and Sasha; they are a family. They're capable of building a whole city made out of money. Every one of them has a family business from restaurants to Mafia bosses. Their friendship is stronger because they are there for each other since the beginning. They're not having a family they wish.

Cindy's father left with her brother and she rarely heard from them and her mother, well, it's safe to say that Cindy see her only when her mother decides to show up and when she does, all her mother does is tell Cindy that everything she does is wrong.

Nick's father lives more time in Russia than he does with Nick, his mother is home but always drunk and with her nose buried deep in cocaine. Elliott does not know his father and his mother is a singer who is always traveling. Sasha's father runs a mafia and still had total control over the mafia in Russia, Sasha's mother took Sasha away because she didn't want him around his father's life, even though Sasha talks to his father sometimes, it isn't a frequent thing, Sasha is very open to his friends about his life. Sandra's father is a rich man in Chicago who gained his money illegally but was too smart to let anyone catch him before he could turn his gains into an legal income. And even though Jennifer has her family with her, she lost the biggest part of her life when Kayden died and even when her parents are almost always there now, they weren't there before.

So they're are there for each other when their families isn't.

"Oh..." Sandra smiled but it quickly faded when she saw Cindy's face. "Well, isn't that a good thing, baby?"

"It should be, shouldn't it?" Cindy asked fidgeting with her hands, "We talk every day, every hour of the day, even when we're in school. When we're at lunch , though she's few tables away, we still text eachother. It's like conversation never ends and I feel--argh, I know there's a strong connection with her, an emotional connection but I'm afraid it won't be the same when it comes to the physical stuff? I mean, what if I'm no good? What if she's not attracted to me in a physical level? What if she doesn't like girls? I just-- I--I'm not like you guys, no offence.., but I have zero experience in any of this, I'm 17 years old and I just had my first kiss, not even a proper one, she barely touched my lips with hers and made me running away. I just don't want to mess it up, while you guys are having fun with girls and boys, I'm here struggling with one girl, I wonder how you guys do it. I know I always come out as the one who doesn't care but this time I do care. She didn't judge me, I began to let my guard down and she didn't push me away, she stayed and she kissed me and what did I do? I pushed her off me and ran away."

"Cindy, no." Sandra replied while shaking her head. It hurt her to hear Cindy think so low of herself, to be so scared of showing her true-self in fear that nobody will accept her, it angered Jennifer because she knew who's fault it is; it's Cindy's mother fault. "Cindy, you're beautiful and anyone will be so lucky to get to know you, to get to love you and be at the receive your affection." Sandra held Cindy's hand gently.

"Cindy, we all have flaws," Jennifer said after Sandra stopped, she know Cindy better.

"There's no one  in this entire world who can be perfect, not even those aliens you believe in. Cindy, I know you think its rare for someone to like you for who you are but Cindy,  you're amazing and you're stunning. Now, if she has rejected you, it would have been her loss, not yours."

"The one that gets to have you will be a lucky woman or man."  Sandra remind her, they all knew Cindy's mother's cruel comments about her, they had been present more than once when Cindy's mother had compared Cindy to one of the girls in her group, always making Cindy feel so little, so much less.

"What if I end up opening up completely to her and she won't like it?" Cindy ask, it scared the hell out of her. Jennifer always thought that she and her friends were all a bunch of kids who had to grow up on their own with problems and pain, maybe that's why they are the way they are: players who have flings but no serious commitments because deep down they are all scared of rejection. They have been rejected by those who are supposed to love them the most, therefore everybody else could  possibly abandon them too. Jennifer has to live with the abandonment of her parents growing up, they are always gone and although she know it hurt them to be away, they are still away, it didn't change anything whether if they wanted to be or not, they weren't there and then her brother decided to abandon her too.

Of course they are afraid of left alone, they are just a bunch of kids afraid of rejection, afraid that nobody will ever love them so they play with hearts and live like grown ups, hiding away their pain .

"Cindy, I don't know what to tell you because honestly, I keep asking myself the same question, over and over again," Jennifer begins looking at Cindy . "I'm scared too, of the same things that you are. But all you need to know is that however it turns out, we will always be here for you, always and forever, the six of us are a family and we will never ever leave you alone. If she rejects you, then she will be the stupidest person ever but you will have to move on and we will be there with you. You will find someone better, someone who will like you so much, someone who will watch teleshopping with you at night when you can't sleep. Someone who will accept and love every single thing about you, even if you don't understand why he or she likes those things about you. He or she will fall in love with your flaws and you will fall in love with his or hers, you will be happy and that's something I know."

"Is that really you who's talking? I don't know how I feel about what you just said." Cindy joked making the three friends laugh. "Maybe I should give it a try?"

"I think you should, put your fears aside and enjoy it while it last, you never know, it might last forever." Sandra smiled and Jennifer nodded in agreement, if only they both do what they were advising Cindy to do..

Sandra has never been in love and although she yearns to feel something aside from desire, she's not sure she'll ever have it. It isn't because of any deep reason why she can't find it in herself to love someone, it's just... she simply can't do it. She has tried to see something different in boys , something other than s*x or company but she can't find it. It has gotten to the point where she doesn't believe there isn't such thing as true love for her.

"So, who's the girl?" Sandra finally asked.

"Well..." Cindy hesitated, she didn't want to tell anyone who it was because the girl didn't want anyone knowing about the two of them, Jennifer had known because she rudely read Cindy's text. Cindy knew her friends would never betray her or her secrets, so she told her. "She doesn't want anyone to know that we talk or that we kissed or anything. It's— Well, it's Emily, Richard's friend."

"No way! She's really pretty!" Sandra smiled at Cindy and Jennifer nodded again, "How did that even happen?"

"I ran into her a few months before Jenny and Richard started dating.  I spilled my coffee on her and well I apologised and we talked for a while, I gave her my flannel and she gave me her number so I'd text her and she can give me back my flannel and then we began to text and text and we never stopped." Cindy smiled at the memory, she remembers Emily's bright blue eyes open wide when her coffee hit her skin and went all over her expensive shirt, Cindy remembers feeling like an i***t and the number exchange, how they began to talk because of Cindy's perfume, how they wouldn't stop texting and how they even fell asleep on the phone while talking to the other.

Cindy had never felt this way before.

She couldn't remember a time when she spoke to someone other than her friends that much. Cindy couldn't believe how connected she felt with Emily. In her 17 years of life, Cindy has never felt anything like that, she never even thought she is capable of such feelings and maybe, just maybe, if she is lucky enough, Emily could return the feelings. Cindy could only hope.

*

Richard is confused and annoyed.

he didn't like how he felt when Jennifer left, that sudden urge to grab her and pull Jennifer to him, to have no space between them, to kiss her lips and hear her laugh. he didn't like the way his whole body burning with Jennifer's touch or the butterflies that her stomach felt like when Jennifer kissed him before leaving or the sudden sadness he felt when Jennifer left. It's stupid, she's just going to check up on her friends, Richard kept telling himself, he kept trying to get rid of this unusual feelings, trying to remove every thought he had of Jennifer out of her head. Richard didn't like the way he was feeling at all.

Jessica was drunk and was pissed off with Nick as he is dancing with Shay . " Why did she ran off?" Emily said while having a shot of vodka.

"What?" Richard and Jessica turned to look at Emily, Emily is beautiful and she is not one to be rejected.

"just for fun" Emily said once again with a fake smile, this time completely changing her sentence, she didn't want to explain, she didn't want anyone to know.

Jessica nodded not really in the mood to know anything at all, Richard made note to ask Emily  tomorrow morning, when they both will be sober.

Richard tried to distract himself by taking care of his drunk friends so he wouldn't think about Jennifer, he wanted to think about anything else but Jennifer, whatever it was, it would be better than the image of Richard has of Jennifer's eyes, Jennifer's hands, Jennifer's lips, Jennifer's words.

I hate Jennifer, Richard thought, he didn't want to like Jennifer, liking Jennifer is like doing self-harm, you know it will hurt you, you know how it will never have a good ending and yet, you still go for it, you still have the hope that maybe, just maybe you're the one for her to give all her old ways up. Jennifer was right and Richard knew it, but Richard also knew Jennifer was never going to give up her ways and right at this point, when the realisation of how he got himself into this whole mess hit him, the realisation that maybe Jennifer could hurt him. Jennifer could break his heart; the idea didn't seem so stupid anymore.

Richard left the party with Jessica and Simon as it was getting late . Emily was nowhere to be found. May be she left , he thought himself.

*

Jennifer looked for Richard everywhere, the party was over, Cindy had 'secretly' asked Emily to stay over, to hide in one of the rooms so they could talk when everyone was gone, it took a lot of persuading and pleading to make Emily stay. She couldn't fight herself, no matter how drunk she was, she needed an explanation. Everyone left , everyone but Jennifer, she couldn't find Richard and she was getting worried, she kept calling Richard, over and over again but there was no answer, she damned Max's mother for having such a big mansion. She was almost done looking through the whole house while she was still calling when Richard finally answered.

"Where-" Jennifer began trying to push down the worry she felt

"I'm okay." Richard said, Jennifer wanted him to talk more so she could understand what it was that she heard in Richard's voice when he spoke, was it... sadness? However Richard stayed in silence for a long minute, a silence that Jennifer didn't dare to break it, there was something being said in the silence and even though Jennifer can understand it, she couldn't... "I called a cab, I'm at Jessica's."

"Are-erm, are you okay?" Jennifer managed once she swallowed hard. She couldn't understand why exactly it was that this little phone call was making her feel so unease, something was changing and Jennifer could feel it, she could literally feel it as if something was moving, something was happening but Jennifer couldn't quite say if she liked it or not.

"Yes." Richard whispered. "Are you okay?"

"I'm okay." Jennifer answered as she walking inside an empty room, she laid in bed trying to figure out why she was so nervous. "Do you-well, do you want to talk?"

"I do." Richard said

"Well," Jennifer hesitated once again, she didn't know what to talk about and she wanted to figure out what was different between them so she went with the basic questions... "What's your favourite colour?"

Richard let out a laugh, "Green." she sighed with a smile on her face.

*

Meanwhile Cindy is trying to explain to Emily that she didn't mean to reject her but she didn't know how and the fact that Emily was drunk, didn't help much. Cindy is trying to get Emily  sit down but she keeps on getting up and  saying she wanted to eat tacos.

"I want to eat Tacos, Taco Bell wouldn't reject me like you did." Emily said with a laugh as she poked Cindy's chest.

"I didn't mean to." Cindy said for the hundredth time.

"Well then kiss me." Emily said, she wasn't going to do it herself, she already tried and Cindy rejected her, it was Cindy's turn to make a move.

"What, like, now?" Cindy asked suddenly nervous, her big blue eyes wide open, making them even bigger. Emily rolled her eyes, she really did like Cindy but sometimes she's too slow and  so  annoyed. Emily just wanted a kiss, a kiss, something so simple. Why couldn't she just kiss her and make it all alright?

Emily waited and waited for what felt like years but Cindy is frozen in place, she's so nervous and scared that she couldn't move. With a sigh, Emily shook her head and headed towards the door, Cindy is not going to do it.

"No,Em, no." Cindy ran after Emily and stopped in front of her. She then counted to 3, grabbed Emily's face and kissed her.

"Better than a taco, huh?" Cindy smiled when they moved as they were out of breath, Emily snored and hugged Cindy.

**