The Girl in the Middle

What did Clay do ?

*Tom*

I am alone in the training room when Kattie shows up. She has been crying, that is all too clear to see. Automatically I stop what I am doing and look at her, waiting for her to tell me.

"Clay did drugs". She says on a sob as she steps up to me and disappears into my arms, like it is the most natural thing in the world. "He went directly to bed this time, but I could see it in his eyes". Of course she could. She had seen him like that plenty of times since Amber died.

"We will get through this Kat". I say, trying to soothe her, allowing myself to kiss her forehead. Almost like a reflex she lifts her head and I know what she wants. She always does this when Clay has been rough on her and she needs comfort. She comes to me, disappears into my arms and lets me kiss her. This time I don’t and I can see the disappointment in her eyes.

"The girl woke up". Kattie whispers, hiding her face against my chest. "She can't remember anything and Clay...". The words get stuck in her throat. She looks pleadingly up at me. "Please Tom, kiss me like you used to before". I have never heard Kattie beg for anything in her life.

"And what about Michael ?" I ask as I push a strand of hair that has escaped her braid behind her ear. Normally that wouldn't really hold me back. But Michael is second in command and our alliance with The Shadows is strained as it was.

"I feel so alone". She whispers and closes her eyes. "I miss us".

Kattie and Clay started The Shadows together. They had raised her sister Hope together and it would surprise me a lot if there had never been anything else between them. But Kattie and I have a different story. I was the one who trained her when no one else would, I stood by her side when Zac and Mike made fun of her for being a girl. The first time we saw someone die we were together. We have fought our share of battles together and we explored our teenage years together.

I miss Kattie. I miss when she used to sneak into my bed at night or we broke into the waterparks together to swim in the pools alone just the two of us. I miss our youth. Which sounds wrong, we are both still young. I have only just turned twenty-six and she is twenty-five.

Just like me and Zac's friendship changed when he became second in command and later when I became leader, so have Kattie's and mine changed. We were no longer carefree teenagers. And she has Michael.

"You know very well that I miss it too". I tell her, pulling her closer to me. Without thinking my fingers find the bare skin on her lower back and I can’t stop myself from caressing it gently. "So what did Clay do about the girls' missing memory ?" I have to focus on something else.

"He gave her the name Amber". I can hear the frustration in her voice and I understand her. That name could very well be her death sentence.

"It's not her fault". I say, both to myself and to Kattie. "We can't let her pay the price for Clay's stupidity".

"I didn't know were to go". The tears once again fills Kattie's eyes then she look up at me. Her hands lock together behind my neck. "I just need to forget it all for just a moment". Her lips are caressing the bottom of my neck.

"Michael ?!" I whisper on a held back breath.

"Is still unconscious and can't really help me". She answers, stretching up on her toes so her lips can reach mine. With a sigh I give in and kiss her back.

It feels so amazing kissing her again. She is strong and I don’t need to worry about breaking her or hurting her. When she presses her body into mine like this, not accepting a no, it leaves my whole body aflame with desire. "Let's go to your room". She whispers in my ear.

As soon as the door is closed behind us, she grabs me and pulls me to her. She kisses me again as she yanks off my shirt. I don’t protest but push her towards my bed.

As soon as I am within reach, I open the nightstand and find what I need. Without breaking our kiss I push the needle into her neck and push down the piston before she can pull away. Her eyes tell me how disappointed she is.

"I'm sorry baby". I whisper softly as I pull out the needle. Her lips try to form a word, but she never manages to before she collapses in my arms and I gently lay her down on my bed.

I sigh and throw the syringe back in the drawer. It had been too close. No matter how much I want her, no matter how much I miss her, I just can’t do it. Not to Michael and not to her.

——-——————————————————————————————————-

When I step into the apartment KC and Hope are sitting in an armchair each. KC's face is emotionless and Hope's tells me she has been crying. "Kattie is at my place". I tell them. "I gave her something to sleep on".

"I did the same with Clay". KC says without looking at me. "He was high as a kite".

"Yeah Kattie told me ...".

"She doesn't know how it turned out". KC slowly raises his eyes to look at me. "She left as soon as he had given her the name".

"What else did he do ?" I am extremely worried now.

"Beside forbidding us to ever mention the name Sarah Noble anywhere near her ?" Hope's voice sounds more and more like Kattie's each day. "The rest you better see for yourself".

I don’t wait for any of them before hurrying to the room where I had carried her myself. I fear the worst, but it isn’t as bad as it could have been. He has cut her hair shorter, so it now only reaches right below her shoulders and he has dyed it several shades darker. There is nothing else to see.

"I don't get him, at all". KC's voice sounds behind me. "First he gives her that name because she looks like Amber and then he makes Hope change her hair to make her look less like her. Why ?"

"How much time went by after him giving her the name before he wanted to change her ?" I ask, feeling for her pulse. It is a habit when people are unconscious and sedated.

"A couple of hours maybe". KC answers. "He spent an awful long time just staring at her and mumbling to himself”.

"My best guess is that the drugs started wearing off and he got more clear headed. He couldn't take back the name, but he could make her different from Amber in another way". I say.

"But it doesn't make it all okay again". KC points out.

I nod. "No but it shows that Clay isn't completely off the racket. If we can just get him to stay away from the damn drugs".

"Not exactly the easiest assignment in the world as he makes his money selling them". KC says rather dryly.

"He needs to want to stop himself". I turn towards KC. "Who knows, maybe she will be his salvation".

"Or she will finish him off".

"Well she can end up being the end of us all, of the entire underworld taking into consideration who she is". What will we do if her father finds her ? What about when Zombie finds out about her ? And what if she doesn't want to stay but wants to go home ? Will Clay be able to let her leave ?

"She is not going to survive this". KC says with regret. "She doesn't have the physics or the psychological strength for this life".