Alpha's Abused Mate.

Realizations...

"Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of chaos and sometimes in the middle of chaos you find yourself!"

~some hours later, hospital~

Noah's pov

"I can't believe how you can be such a fool! Really! What the hell did you think, huh?" he asks me trying to control his rage but I can distinguish it in his voice.

He is mad at me, at least mad and he is right...

This is the first time I agree with him so much and I have no problem he is yelling at me! I have no excuse, I opened my big, fat, dirty mouth and I destroyed everything, again!

I guess I am a moving trouble, there is no other excuse and I feel so... Cheap and stupid!

Cora doesn't want me, now I am sure she is never going to accept me back, she will never love me again because I had her love back then and I lost it, she will never leave Ivan and I will...

Have to live without her and this hurts like hell!

I would love to die, I shouldn't have been alive and I am too weak to kill myself...

Cora was strong enough to reject me about five years ago, her heart rejected me and when she shifted our bond broke for good and now it's like it never existed but the worst part is that it will never come back because Cora will never accept me again.

She has given her heart to someone else and her heart agrees... She wants...

Ivan!

I still can't believe they are going to get married, he asked from her to marry him almost immediately, I mean they are together for less than a week and look at them! She is rushing so much and I have listened to the gossips, Ivan was rude and her biggest opponent all these years, he hated her and now look at her!

She forgives him and moves on but she doesn't want to give me a chance, us! And we had a son together and I saved her and...

"You hurt her, you killed her!" my wolf states weakly and quite tired and I sigh heavily with the pain in my chest appearing again.

He woke up an hour ago and I told him everything as well as Leo... I am glad he is alright and he has no problem, he is still quite dizzy but there is no doubt he is going to be perfectly fine in a while.

"Because of Cora! We owe her and you know it, the least you can do is stay away from her as she asked you!" he adds and I stiffen nervously.

"I love her... Very much, this is killing me, I can't live without her!" I say with my heart aching and he groans in frustration.

"You have lost your chance, you loved her only when she was too far gone and there is no reason to have hopes, not anymore, she was clear Noah! She is getting married to Ivan!"

"But you know he was an asshole to her and..."

"And the end Noah! He never harmed her like you did! He never tried to kill her, they had nothing!" he cuts me off furious.

"I can't understand you Natan! How do you know he loves her and she will be fine with him? Maybe one day..."

"NO NOAH!" he screams and I freeze.

"Cora knows what she is doing and if she is rushing so much means that she is more than sure about him! And do you know what? He really loves her, I can see it from the way he is looking at her! This is pure love and she deserves it, she had more than enough, let her be happy with the man she loves!" he continues and I bury my face in my hands gasping from the wave of pain that gets more intense due to my movement.

No one understands me, I wish I was dead, Cora shouldn't have saved me because now I will be suffering and my torture is never going to end.

"I am talking to you!" Leo shouts running out of patience and I lower my hands a bit to give him a short, nervous look.

He is fuming, this is not my brother or the one I used to know. He looks so older suddenly, so strong, so confident and this is scary. I had never imagined this side of Leo's, he was always patient, calm, logical, he was trying to help you calm down and now he has nothing to do with that Leo.

"Leo... Can we stop this conversation and..."

"This is not a damn conversation here and no, we can't!" he interrupts me and stands up from the chair next my bed.

He takes one step to me, leans forward, places his hands on my bed touching my skin on my right, bare hand and looks at me in the eyes with his gaze darker than the usual. I think I can feel to his hot breath and my skin shivers. I leave my hands fall on the bed heavily and lower my gaze unable to continue having eye contact with him.

I can't!

"Talk!" he says breathless and I sigh narrowing my eyes from the pain.

It is going to take me about a day to stop hurting that much and my wounds get completely healed as the doctor told me. I was lucky I survived and Cora gave blood for me but this does not mean I will recover that fast because I lost lots of energy and blood and my body needs to get used to everything from the beginning. I feel even cold, I need to cover myself better but I have no mind or strength for even this...

"Say what?" I mutter staring at my feet and he exhales heavily.

"Whatever you are thinking about! Just tell your brother!" he replies shortly and I bite my lower lip turning to him thoughtfully.

"Really?"

"Yes, come on, say it!" he orders shaking his head and I nod defeated.

I can't do otherwise, he is the only person I have to and I need to talk although he won't understand me, nobody can!

"I miss her, I want her, I need her, I am in love! It is killing me, she is choosing him over me, they are getting married and I can't understand why she saved me then!" I say heartbroken ready to cry and he sits next to me with a serious, blank expression.

"Look... I understand you love her, I believe you but you have to understand that you never showed her real love, it is too late and she found someone else! You don't know what is happening with Ivan, you haven't lived them so stop comparing you and him! I have seen them and I know he is really in love with her and you should be happy that she finally found someone to make her happy! She can't be happy with you because of your past and this is your fault brother! And do you want an advice?" he says and I nod with my vision getting blurred from some tears.

"Cora... Loves you but not in the erotic way! This is why she saved you, you are her son's father and she has proven that this matters for her, so be happy she saved you, she wanted you alive, she was scared! If you want her in your life then accept only her friendship, if she wants you to be friends. I am sure that if you calm down and accept it, she will think of it, she will agree!"

"What are telling me Leo? To become her friend?" I ask some seconds after he is done and he nods.

"You need her in your life and I guess she won't have problem to talk to you, she wants you to be happy and she is going to be better as well, this is going to erase the bad memories somehow! Think of it, do it for Miles and for the love you have for him and her! This is the best way to leave the past behind!" he says and I sigh stiffening.

To be honest I hadn't thought about it and this is a solution somehow but could I be her friend when I love her?

"Ivan is her mate and she is going to tell him... The sooner! There is no possibility for you to be together! Do you want her happy?" he says watching my hesitation yet thoughtful look and I smile melancholically.

"This is the only thing I want! Cora happy, she deserves it more than anyone." I reply truthfully and he smiles placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Then make her happy and stand on her side Noah! Give her your wishes for a great life and stop being an obstacle for her! Help her now with the invisible enemies she has because it has to do with all of us as well! Tell her everything about Miles, anything you know and you will feel better, I promise you!" he says gently and the next second he opens his eyes widely and I groan worried.

"What?" I ask impatient.

"I will give you one more reason to ask from Cora to become friends and I want you to be calm, okay? I just remembered it, I am so shocked damn it!" he murmurs rubbing the back of his head and I sign for him to continue holding my breath in agony.

I don't like this look, really, this is freaking me out!

"Um... Would you like a new mom?" he asks smirking innocently and I blink my eyes confused.

"Did you hit your head or something?" I ask with concern and he rolls his eyes.

"No i***t! I mean it... What if our father found his second mate and they look very happy?" he says and I try to sit up but he stops me.

Damn the pain, this is killing me! I feel so useless!

"Easy there reckless boy!" he exclaims trying to hold back his laughter.

"Alright Leo, just talk! I am getting crazy here!" I say through my teeth and he raises his hands defeated.

"Fine brother! Look... You know her and... We had realized nothing about them!" he replies in hurry.

I narrow my eyes and think with the less patience I have left but nobody comes in my mind. My father has a mate and I know her?

This is already a huge shock for me, a second mate? My father has a second mate?

And this is another reason for me to be friend with Cora?

What the hell?

"Just say her name! I have no idea!" I say in frustration and he bites his lower lip wickedly.

"Um... Alena!" he states in a more devilish tone and I gasp.

What is wrong with this universe?

"What is it bro?" he asks me after some seconds with me being a statue and I cough groaning.

"Tell me you are kidding!"

"No, isn't it fantastic?"

"It is a sick, bad joke!" I exclaim and he breaks into laughter enjoying how dizzy I am.

I am sure I look like an i***t!

"Hey, don't you like it? Alena is cool!" he manages to say wiping some first tears from his eyes and I punch his arm playfully.

"If she wants to kill you then believe me she is not!" I yell and this makes things worse, he is laughing louder.

Look what a brother I have!

He is enjoying it, alright! Alena seems to be a great woman really but this is so weird! I 'was' Cora's mate and now my dad is Alena's?

And I am going to repeat it again, she wants to kill me and I understand she has a very good reason but this is not helping me either!

"Come on brother! She is awesome, really and if you and Cora forget about the past then so will Alena! You know... She already loves dad, she found him, she had gotten crazy and you really have to see them together! Our old man is acting like a teenage boy! He was so sweet, he was blushing, he was missing her when I was with him..."

"Oh my God!" I exclaim ready to start laughing as well and he nods giggling.

"I am freaking out I missed such a thing!" I murmur amused.

"I know it is weird, believe me the same goes for me as well, after mom I hadn't thought of it and especially with Alena but..." he starts melancholically and I take his hand in mine and give it a squeeze.

He is right...

The three of us love my mother like crazy, she was an angel and after her loss I changed because it broke me. She was my everything and when I lost her I felt so... Cold!

And now Alena is my stepmother...

I have to say that if I and Cora had no problems before I would be very happy for them but now I feel weird because she doesn't like me and she is right. There is no way I am disagreeing with their relationship, I want my father happy although I have done nothing till today to make him happy but...

This changes from now because I love him, he is the only shelter I have, he loves me and I don't want him to be in pain! If Alena is his happy ending then I am going to stand by his side and I will try to solve everything with Alena and even...

Cora!

Maybe Leo is right, the only chance I have to have Cora in my life is forgetting about us as a couple and accepting to become friends, if she wants me of course.

"He will be happy with her and this is more than enough for us!" I say emotionally and he nods, leans and hugs me.

"Yes and I want you to know that today I died for both of you! He means the world to me and... You are my older, asshole brother but..." he whispers and I laugh tapping his back.

"You love me like I love you even though I haven't showed it from the moment we lost mom!" I end his phrase and he groans in agreement.

"I know and..."

"WHERE IS THE ASSHOLE AND HIS w***e!" her annoying, squeaky voice sounds and Leo jumps up when she opens the door and breaks into the room like a maniac.

Camilla!

She is so angry, her eyes are black, they are shining, her jaw is clenching, her fists are shaking uncontrollably, she can't breathe and it's the first time she has no makeup or she is not wearing revealing clothes and she can't be recognized so easily. Well, no, she is not recognizable at all!

"We knock the door before we come in!" Leo speaks up first breaking the silence and she snaps her head to him.

All this time she had been staring at me deadly in the eyes and this is something new, I had never seen her like this.

"f**k OFF KID! GET LOST!" she roars and walks to us screaming.

Alright, this is it!

I have lost my patience, there is no way I am accepting this behavior, the last thing I want is her!

"Calm down or get out and be careful when you talk to my brother!" I shout sitting up slowly and she smirks ironically with Leo walking in front of my bed and blocking her way.

"Really bastard? Now you love the little i***t, right? You became a team, huh? And where is your slut? She is going to pay for slapping me and for the way her friend dragged me out of the hospital! She humiliated me, YOU ARE HUMILIATING ME! DID YOU SLEEP WITH HER, DID YOU? HAD YOU BEEN WITH HER? HOW DID SHE FIND YOU?" she roars and pushes Leo that tries to grab her without harming her because she is pregnant to...

"ANSWER ME ASSHOLE!" she screams slapping him and I growl trying to stand up but the pain has immobilized me.

"ENOUGH!" I roar shaking with Natan howling outraged.

I feel my blood boiling, my chest is killing me, my heart is beating like crazy and all I see is red.

She is unbelievable although I know she never really loved me she had to at least respect the situation we are all in. She doesn't care about me, she didn't, I know it, Leo told me everything and she can't lie and trick me. I believe him and I know what a b***h she is.

Cora and Rosana put her in her place before and Leo took everything in his hands and I agree! I don't want her to be in lead of anything, she wants power without trying or deserving it and I am done being patient!

"NO, IT'S NOT ENOUGH! I AM YOUR LUNA! YOU WERE WITH HER, I KNEW NOTHING, YOU ARE CHEATING ON ME BUT I WON'T ACCEPT IT AGAIN! YOU ARE DONE!" she roars getting ready to attack me but Leo grabs her and Cora's two guards break into the room and run to them.

"GET HER OUT! BEFORE I KILL HER!" I scream struggling to stand up and the men pull her back.

"No Noah! Relax!" Leo shouts rushing to me preventing me from trying more and I fall back gasping.

"Your w***e put men to guard you?! Is this how scared she is? I will kill you, I have your baby and you..." she keeps on screaming as they take her out and the one of them closes to door.

I growl with my eyes closed and my fists shaking, I can't breathe, the pain in so much like electricity is passing through my body and I am so frustrated that I feel like I want to throw up.

If I could just kill her...

"Are you alright? Do you want me to call the doctors? How do you feel?" Leo asks me worried breathless and I open my eyes slowly.

He is getting panicked, this is how worried he is and I smile emotional taking his hand. I owe him and my father a big apology, I have caused them so much pain and they have done nothing than loving and standing on me.

"I am but I will be great once she gives birth and I take my..." I start but stop.

I close my eyes again, press my lips together and my mind gets on fire.

I don't know why but a feeling starts building up and this is weird because some new thoughts come in my mind and I am surprised.

Why did I never think of it?

There is a possibility, now that I am thinking of it that night I was...

Too drunk!

"Noah what is it?" he asks me dragging me from my thoughts and I groan cursing.

FUCK!

It could...

"Leo... I think... I mean..." I murmur and open my eyes sitting up slowly meeting his agonic expression.

"What?" he asks breathless.

"What if this child is not mine?"

****************************

Hello dear friends!

I am back with the 26th chapter with Noah being in the middle of lots of revealings, decisions, suspicions and realization!

I am sorry for not having Cora and Ivan in this chapter but this chapter is important as well and I will make it up to you in the next one! 

Let's take it slowly now.

There are new books! 

The first one is called Cleo's Heart Decisions and it's about a girl that is getting rejected from her mate and Alpha for someone else, she doesn't want to leave but she is in pain and there is a mysterious unknown wolf gains her interest! Lots of secrets and revealings are going to bring the upside down in her life and the pain is going to change her heart and future probably forever! Please check it out and tell me your opinion, I am extremely excited and I hope you'll like it!

Moreover there is one more new book and the first chapter was published yesterday and it's name is Thorns Of The Past! It is about three couples with different love stories. Becky run away after Gabriel marked someone else and they meet again after 18 years but this time Becky has their kids. Their son find his mate in the face of Gabriel's stepdaughter's, Hayley's, the daughter of the woman that got between his parents. Lots of problems, fights and dangers are going to threaten everyone so if you are interested check it out, I can't say more, I am sorry!

And now I am waiting for you comments about this chapter! What do you think about it? How do you feel about Noah? Is Leo right? Is Noah going to do the right thing now? Wha about Camilla? What is going to happen next?

And as always at this point I would like to thank you very much for your love, support, commends and impatience in order to read the chapters. I am trying my best so continue showing me how much you want more and commend and tell me your opinions and thoughts, or share the story.

This is it for this time, see you again in the next chapter. Be safe and happy until next time!

I love you all,

                                                  Marie...