BROKEN & SCREWED (BS #1)

Chapter 6

6

Two months went by quicker than I realized. Angie and I went to every football game. Justin played and Marissa cheered, so we supported both of them. I never told either of them of that weird day with Sarah in the cafeteria. We didn’t interact much after that. We had one class together, and she was always partners with her two friends in the class. Eric was in the same class, but he always ended up in my group. And I thought about Jesse every day.

I tried not to. I really did, but I couldn’t help it.

The few times that my father was at home, he always had ESPN on in the background. And most of those times, there seemed to be a discussion about upcoming freshman that would be watched for the season. Jesse’s name was never left out. And then there was the time my mom had an entertainment gossip show on the television. Jesse’s dad had a movie premiere on the red carpet. The cameras always talked about Malcolm Hunt with a snapshot to Jesse, the future star basketball son of his.

That premiere turned into too many, along with all the other media interviews. It wasn’t customary to pay attention to the producer’s son, but when that son looked like Jesse Hunt and already had the reputation he did, most of them included his name in the interviews. And the same video footage of the time Jesse attended a premiere would roll. He’d been dressed in a black tuxedo with his hair still buzzed and the same unemotional look he’d had during his senior year. At least he hadn’t taken a date. I breathed easier when I saw he was solo, but then I told myself it didn’t mean a thing.

He never called. He hadn’t visited. There’d been no communication from him and I knew there wouldn’t be.

So, when Homecoming rolled around at the end of October, I accepted Eric’s invitation to be his date, even though I wasn’t sure I should’ve. He didn’t seem to notice my reluctance or the guilt I carried after. He was all smiles every time he saw me in class and was eager to plan the details of the date.

“Hey, you.” Angie’s dressed swished around her as she carried it with one hand. She grimaced when she came into my bedroom and pouted at the sight of my bed. “We haven’t even gotten to the game and I already just want to fall asleep.”

“Look at you. You’re beautiful.”

She was, in a princess-style green dress with taffeta underneath. It wasn’t Angie, but she said Justin picked it out. She aimed to please, and that dress was going to please him. Her hair was her style. She had it piled high in a braid, intertwined with flowers. She always said she wanted it pretty, but simple and out of the way. It was that indeed.

She groaned as she turned my fan on and stood in front of it. “I don’t know about that, but I’m damn jealous right now. You’re lucky you didn’t make Homecoming Court, otherwise you’d be wearing that gorgeous pink thing you’ve got in your closet instead of waiting until the last second to put it on. Oh no, you would be sweating your ass off right now, even though you know you’re going to be freezing it off at the game tonight.” A huff emitted from her throat as she cursed and sat on my bed. “I don’t give a rat’s ass if my dress is messed up. This thing looks ridiculous on me.”

I chuckled and turned back to the mirror to finish my makeup. It wasn’t much, some eyeliner and lipstick. I was done two seconds later. “You’re being a good girlfriend, that’s what you’re doing. And since you don’t really care about Homecoming and Justin does, you’re doing the right thing in my mind.”

“Mine, too.” She groaned. “But, hell, I’m suffering here. He doesn’t have to put on his tuxedo until after the game. He only has to show up on my arm at halftime. It sucks being a girl.”

“I agree with that.”

Then she sighed. “Have you heard what Marissa’s plans are?”

When she struggled to stand, I caught her hand in mine and pulled her upright. Then I shook my head. “I don’t think she’s going to cheer tonight and change, just change into her dress in the locker room. That’s all I know.”

“I’d still like to know how she got Cord Tatum to come back to school as her Homecoming date. She’s got some balls for that one. I didn’t think any alumni returned to high school, especially if they went to Grant West and ran in the same circles as Jesse Hunt.” Angie laughed when she gathered her dress up once more to fit through my doorway again.

I stopped at her words and a shiver passed through me. She talked about him as if he weren’t a real person anymore. As she continued to muse about Marissa’s powers over the opposite s*x, I realized that maybe Jesse had become nonexistent to her. He’d never interacted with her. He had only been another member on Justin’s sports team, whichever it was at the time.

When she continued down the hallway and down the stairs, I knew she hadn’t looked back.

I was still rooted in my bedroom. I hadn’t forgotten that Cord would be going to the dance with us, and I hadn’t forgotten that he was friends with Jesse, but I hadn’t dwelled on it, either. I couldn’t stop thinking about it and the idea of it, and it made my stomach twist. I would be in the presence of someone who saw Jesse on a daily basis, and the thought had me sweating.

I turned the fan on myself and counted from fifty to one.

I wasn’t going to see Jesse. This was ridiculous. What was wrong with me?

“Hey, get your cute butt down here. I want to get this night started so it’ll end faster. Hurry up!”

When I went downstairs, I never stopped to look in the kitchen or living room. If anyone was in there, they didn’t care. I didn’t even think they were aware it was October.

When we got to the game, Angie waved and went one way. I went the other.

“Alex! Over here! Over here!” Ben pumped his hand back and forth in the air as he yelled over the crowd. He pointed to the seat beside him. “I have a seat for you! Over here!”

Some guys yelled at him to shut up, but my coworker beamed at me. He was dressed in our school’s colors: yellow and black. He wore a yellow hat, a yellow scarf, yellow gloves, and he even waved a yellow hankie in the air. His coat was black.

As I went through the crowd to his side, he clapped his hands from excitement. “Hey! I’m vibrating with giddiness tonight.”

“Why?” I brushed back my hair and tried to peer around the three guys in front of us.

“It’s Homecoming.” He spoke as if it were the next up-and-coming event that was going to change our lives. “Do you have a date? Wait. I heard that Eric Nathan asked you.” He nudged me with his elbow and winked. “Where is he? Why isn’t he sitting with you?”

I laughed and elbowed him back. “Because he’s on the Homecoming Court. They wait somewhere else.”

“Oh. Wait. You’re his date. Don’t you have to go out there with him?”

“They paired him up with a girl who’s already in the court. I don’t have to put my dress on until the dance.”

“Oh.” He sounded disappointed.

“You okay with that?”

“Yeah, whatever.” Ben sniffled and jerked forward.

“Ben.”

“What?” He didn’t look at me.

“Ben.”

“What?” He still didn’t look.

I sighed. “Are you going to the dance with anybody?”

“No,” he clipped out. His bottom lip was thrust out in a pout. “But, that’s okay. It’s not like it means anything to me. It’s not like I’m a senior too, and I have other friends that I could’ve gone with.”

My eyes closed. He did have other friends. He had two others, but they were younger. Ben might’ve been my coworker and someone who cared about me, but he was seen as an outcast to everybody else. I was the insensitive one who didn’t look at things from his perspective.

“I’m sorry. Would you go with me and Eric?”

He turned in a flash, his smile blinding me. “Really?”

“Really.”

“Oh, thank you! Thank you!” He bundled me to him in a big hug and rocked me back and forth. “You’re so great.”

“Hey.” Someone cleared their throat behind me, and I turned around. The smile died and the laughter faded away. Cord Tatum stood at the end of our aisle in a black leather bomber jacket and custom-fitted jeans. He had jet-black hair with the ends sticking straight up and dark brown eyes to match.

Almost out of instinct, I knew this guy was Marissa’s counterpart. She had met her match with him. I knew he had been part of Ethan’s class, but I couldn’t remember what he had been like in high school. I did know that he went to Grant West and was on the same team as Jesse. Two basketball stars from the same school was a big thing around our town.

“Marissa told me I could sit with you.” He held his hand out. “I’m Cord. I don’t know if you remember me or not.”

“Hi. Alex Connors.”

I shook his hand. It was firm and steady. He squeezed my hand before he lifted a hand in a wave to Ben. “Hi, I’m Cord.”

“Ben.” His voice came out as a squeak. He seemed mortified and squeaked again as he huddled beside me.

As Cord sat beside me, he pulled out some leather gloves and slipped them on. He shuddered in his jacket. “Man, its cold out here. It’s a little bit warmer at Grant West, by ten degrees at least. I forget how much that makes a difference.” He laughed a little. “I haven’t been back home since last Christmas. I think my mom had a heart attack when I walked through the door. All her biscuits went on the floor except the one that’s stuck to the ceiling.”

He talked to me as if we were best friends. Was he like this with everyone or had Marissa spoken so much about me he felt like he knew me? My tongue felt heavy as I asked, “So how did you and Marissa get together?”

“Through Jesse.” He grinned and caught my gaze. His eyes were so warm.

My heart stopped. Through Jesse?

“Really?” My throat felt constricted now. “How did that happen?”

He laughed again and hunched his shoulders forward for warmth. “She kept calling the house one night. Jesse was tired of it so he told me to talk to her.”

“She was calling him?”

He nodded and gave me another good-natured grin. “Yep. I told her off. She told me off right back, and then I started to take her calls when she would call.” He laughed again. “Man, I can’t believe how many girls throw themselves at Jesse. He’s a big deal around here, huh?”

“You could say that.”

My heart sank at his words. Marissa had still chased him. When I felt tears coming to my eyes, I stood up. “Excuse me. I’m going to get something to drink.”

“Alex, get me one, too!” Ben hollered, but I hurried down the bleachers and through the crowd. More and more people stood between me and some fresh air. I needed that air. I needed that freedom. Everything was suffocating me.

As I slipped around a building, I heaved in deep breaths. No one else was there. Thankful for the privacy, I pressed my forehead against the building and took more breaths.

How could she do that? Didn’t she remember?

Betrayal, longing, and hurt settled over me.

How was I going to last the night? Oh God. Was I going to say anything to Angie about it?

“Alex?”

I stiffened. Eric had the worst timing.

He came farther around the side of the building, a frown on his face. “Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” I tried to smile as continued to try to catch my breath and slow my heartbeat. “I’m fine. What are you doing?”

His frown doubled. “I saw you leave the stands and thought something was wrong. Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine.” My best friend stabbed me in the back. “Really. You look really handsome.” I nodded to the tuxedo he had on under his jacket.

“Oh.” He shrugged. “Yeah. Not as beautiful as you’ll be tonight, or that you already are. You already are beautiful. You’re always beautiful, actually. Even in school, and I’m going to stop talking.” He gave me a sheepish look. “You sure you’re okay? You can talk to me, you know. You can talk to me about anything.”

I held my breath and blinked back the tears that threatened. He seemed like such a nice guy and I was upset about another guy. What was wrong with me?

“You’re a really nice guy.” I sighed.

His smile slipped a little. “Ah, the words of death.”

“What?”

He looked down at the ground. “No guy wants to be the nice guy. Nice guys finish last.”

My heart broke again. What was I doing? Here was a great guy and I was waiting for another one who broke me every time. I gave Jesse my virginity and look what I had for it? Nothing. He was away. I was here. He couldn’t even bring himself to call me. Yet, here Eric was, proclaiming how beautiful he thought I was.

I was such an i***t.

I reached out before I knew what I was doing. When my hand touched his, his head whipped up, and his eyes went wide. He grasped my hand tight and pulled me close. His arms lifted and he hugged me. That was it, nothing more. I let out a surrendering breath and let myself enjoy what he was offering. Nothing. He was offering a hug.

It’d been a long time since I’d only been held. It felt needed.

I hugged him back.

Eric hugged me tighter to him, but then he stepped back and ran a hand through his hair. “Uh, I don’t really know how to say this, so I guess I’m just going to say it.” He took a deep breath. “Okay, here it goes.” His eyes found mine. They were piercing. “I want to be more than friends, Alex. I really like you. I’ve really liked you for a while, but you seemed so lost last year. I, uh, would you consider going on a real date with me? Tonight doesn’t have to be it, just some other night.”

I stood there. I had no thoughts.

He kicked at the ground and pushed his hands in his jacket’s pockets. Then he glanced around. “You can think about it. You don’t have to answer right now. We could go bowling or eat or go see a movie or whatever.” His shoulders lifted up and down again. “Let me know, you know?”

“I will.”

“Really?”

“I’ll let you know.”

“Oh.”

Someone yelled his name, and he gave me resigned look. “I guess that’s my call. Are you coming to watch the court?”

I nodded. “Yeah, I’m coming.”

“Okay.” He jerked forward and pressed his lips against my forehead in a hurried kiss. “Sorry. I—sorry. Okay. See you later.”

He waved again before he disappeared around the building, and I was left alone once more. I was such a moron. Then I took a deep breath. I stopped thinking. I stopped feeling. As I went back to the game, I knew everything would sort itself out.

It had to.