Addicted to Redemption

Regret

Dean

After dinner, we helped to wash the dishes with Kate, while the adults went to the living room. She put her hair in a ponytail and started scrubbing the plates, while I rinsed and dried them.

- How are you feeling? - I asked and she stopped for a second. Kate turned to look at me and smiled sweetly.

- A lot better. Honestly, I still feel a bit awkward, I can't remember when I had such a nice time. It feels like a life I don't belong to. - She lifted her fingers and played with the bubbles on them as she said;

- As if with a wrong move of mine or a misplaced word would be enough to shatter this dream. - with that she clenched her palm destroying the bubbles on her fingers. I grabbed her hand and rinsed it.

- Follow me. - I said and pulled Kate after me. I stopped at the living room door, and pulled Kate in front of me, holding her shoulders gently, leaning her back against my chest. From the living room, lively latin music was heard. Life was smiling and rocking herself to the rhythm of the music, while she was sitting on one of the burnt orange armchairs. In the middle of the room there were my parents. They danced in perfect harmony with the music and with each other. Mom giggled as dad twirled her around the room, and she playfully shook her shoulders and hips to tease my father. He enjoyed the teasing with a goofy smile and hungry look in his eyes. None of them noticed our presence, therefore I leaned to Kate's ear and whispered.

- Even if it seems like a dream, this is your new reality. I brought you back to teach you how to live, in the end you decide to truly live, I'll let you go. But Kate, this, is going to be your home, forever. A place and feeling to return to. Kate turned around to face me and her eyes were filled with tears. I expected that she is going to hug me but instead, she pushed me back hard and ran out of the house.

Kate

What is he even talking about? Leaving? Living? Me? How? I have no idea how to live and why the f*****g hell would I choose a miserable life when I can have all this and more with Dean? - the thoughts ran circles in my mind and I needed some air. I ran out and inhaled the scent of the flowers along with the fresh, still warm, end of the summer. I ran to one of the maple trees Life created earlier and leaned against it, hiding behind. My hands trembled as I remembered that soon, school will start again. Soon, I'll have to go back to the grey days and to the pain. The pain and fear I felt was something already familiar, and I reached into my pocket instinctively. A harsh laughter left my throat when I realized, what I was about to do.

- Gorgeous Kate...! You f*****g miserable piece of s**t! After years and years of living in the shadows, being beaten up and humiliated daily. After hiding behind all different substances you could have bought with the little money you stole, you finally get a chance to be normal. And what you do?! At the first little inconvenience, you want to throw it all away for what? For a few minutes of numbness? - I asked myself out loud and didn't notice that I was diving my nails into my flesh on my arms. Suddenly I got grabbed by a shadow, he held my shoulders tightly and even pushed me against the tree. Soon the shadow started to morph into someone, I cared about deeply. His golden eyes were filled with tears, but his glance as furious. His hold got so strong on me that his fingers deepened into my shoulders, causing me to hiss a bit.

- This hurts. - I said, but Dean kept holding me. His shoulders were trembling and suddenly he released me only to hit the tree behind me. By the touch of his fist, the tree suddenly dried out and turned into ashes, leaving simply a black circle on the ground. I lost my balance without it and started falling back, but Dean caught me by my waist. He helped me back up on my feet, and left without saying a word. As Dean got farther, my heart beat faster and louder. No! No! No! My mind shouted and every nerve in my body wanted to run after him but my legs didn't move. I fall on my knees and touched the circle that was left after the tree. I looked up at the house. The house of Death was filled with life and warmth. People usually feared death, but it looked so peaceful and warm. I couldn't imagine that life can be the same way as well.

- Aren't you going after him? - a low and painful voice asked. I glanced behind me and saw an old man, with his hair white as snow. He was short and fragile, leaning on a walking stick. One of his eyes was golden like Dean's while the other was blue like the ocean. He wore a simple linen shirt and matching trousers.

- Who... Who are you? - I asked taking a step back to get some distance between us. I stumbled a bit under the intensity of his gaze. He smiled and sighed, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pocket watch.

- You know me as Regret, but everyone else called me Bob, although that was really long time ago. - he opened the watch and showed me a picture of himself but decades ago, on the other side , the watch was a broken, and the picture of a gorgeous woman smiled back at me.

- There was once a time, when I thought like you now. What if I'm going to ruin everything? What if I'm too weak or if I'm not worthy of their love? As time passed I missed my chances to be happy and ended up on my deathbed with only a long list of regrets. After my death, Life asked if I wanted to live again. I nodded and got a life where I repeated all my previous mistakes, only to regret wasting my life away. That's when they assigned me to this job to remind people like you sweetheart, that the worse that could happen to you is not failing, but to give up without even trying! - he gave me the watch and I saw Dean's picture in it. I gasped and gave him back before I ran back to the house. Before entering I turned around to thank him, but Regret was nowhere to be found. Without any second thoughts, I ran upstairs, and ripped Dean's bedroom door open. He wasn't there. My heart skipped a beat and I turned abruptly around to search for him, when my forehead met something firm and a little wet. I fall back on my bottom and looked up at the confused Dean. He was probably just coming out of the shower, as he wasn't completely dry yet. I blushed seeing his fine abs and that only a towel separated reality from my dreams. He reached his hand towards me and I got up.

- What are you doing here Kate? - he asked a bit coldly, but I understood that he was simply hurt. I grabbed his face and pulled him into a deep kiss, that burned us up. Dean grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him. After our kiss I looked into his eyes and said.

- I'm sorry for not believing in myself and in us. I promise, I'll work harder, because... I want to make you happy.