Forever and Always

Chapter Ten: Jo

Jo

“Are you sure this is what you want to do? This is going to be hard on your emotions, and I'm worried about you. I can still come if you want?” Nick asked me while he stood at the door of our home, our old home, while I was standing on the stairs, my chest hurting with anxiety. He was holding Jamie in his arms, cuddling onto his shoulder while I held a small duffle bag in my hand. When Taylor came over earlier in the week, I was more than surprised. I was scared. Terrified. But I knew I had nothing to worry about, not with her, "I know you can handle it, but still. I can't help but worry about your mental health."

"I'll be okay." I smiled up at them, "I have Taylor who has my back and well, from what the others said earlier, I have hope."

"I'm glad," he sighed and gave a soft smile. Nick has been nothing but more than supportive. He took care of everything when it came to the house in Crossdale, and he even went as far as to call my boss and told them I was moving at the last minute due to a family emergency. He really is the best friend a girl could ask for.

He's up there with Taylor. She has been wonderful since she first stepped back into my life, our lives.

She spent the past few days with me catching up on everyone and everything. It was like being back home all over again, but the first night was the hardest night with her. There were lots of tears and hugs, but I was happy to have her back in my life. I explained everything, so much, from the beginning, but of course, she’s the one that was able to put everything in perspective for me.

We spent the whole morning going through Jamie’s room and slowly packing up things to put in Tristian and Austin’s trucks. I think they were more excited about this move than I was about going back home. I mean, they all were, but Austin and Tristian were on a whole other level. Nick was excited about starting working with Finn in a couple of weeks after meeting him formally. Austin is happy to have his grandson close to him. Tristian is too, but also happy that I’m coming home.

Me, on the other hand, I’m filled with anxiety. I keep thinking about the worst-case scenarios. It’s not only Archer that I have to face. It’s Dylan and Ray, Jamie’s aunt and uncle. They have been nothing but supportive of me since I started hanging around them all those years ago. They even offered a place for me to live, and I do this to their family.

Same with Jordan and Summer. They are also people I’ve grown close to and I know this is going to hurt them. Ava, Sawyer, Finn, Art…I can see them getting all extremely upset with me. I won’t blame them for being upset, never. This is my fault and I accept that. I did things wrong and if I could go back and change it, I would.

We got a lot done, but something was still nagging in the back of my mind and I have a feeling I know what it was.

He has no idea I’m coming home. I wanted to tell him beforehand to prepare him, but I don’t think I’ll get that chance. He won’t listen to anyone when it comes to me. I hurt him, so badly. I hate myself for what I did, but I did what I thought was the right thing at the time.

I have never been so wrong, and I hate myself for it. I can never forgive myself for what I did to everyone.

Taylor was cuddling on the couch with Jamie as he was laying his head in her lap while I was making popcorn in the kitchen. When Jamie met Taylor a few hours ago, he instantly took a loving to her. He wouldn’t leave her side and always wanted to cling to her, and she was in heaven. I could see the questions burning in her eyes whenever she looked at me, but I promised I would tell her everything.

And while Austin and Tristian were giving Jamie a bath before they headed into town to get dinner, Taylor sat me down outside on the stairs and I told her everything. I told her everything from when he showed up at my dorm and how stupid we were not to use protection and me taking the plan b pill, to showing up at Dylan’s and everything after. With everything, tears sprung in her eyes. But everything changed when I showed her the phone I had that had the messages on it.

When she read them, she got angry, but not at me or Archer. Her words echoed in my mind for a while.

“Jo, I promise you, he didn’t send these.” She sighed as she continued to read our conversation, “I know my cousin and this isn’t him. He would never say this to you, not in a million years.”

“That’s what I thought too.” I wiped away a tear, “But it’s his phone number, and it’s how he talks.”

“Jo, look at me.” She grabbed my hand in hers as I looked up at her reddened face, “This wasn’t him. I promise you, on my life, it’s not. I’ve been with him almost every damn day since I came back to town, and he has been nothing but sweet and kind. He has had nothing but nice things to say about you and he’s constantly told us how much he misses you. If he didn’t, then why would he come to your place that night years ago?”

“I…I don’t know.” I stuttered as I sniffled.

“If he didn’t, then why would it pain him to hear about you starting a family with someone else? Even though we know the truth, he doesn’t. He wouldn’t be sad, upset or depressed if he said these things. He would be living his best life, going out with the guys, seeing other girls, living the bachelor life.”

“He doesn’t have time to do that.” I shrugged as I turned and looked back out into the backyard, “He has Tara and his own family to worry about.”

“What makes you think that?” she asked, confused.

“Tara…she was pregnant with his kid…they were living together and trying to make things work. I read the messages he sent her. I read everything and the evidence was there when I went to his house.”

“Austin and dad didn’t tell you?” she questioned. I gave her a confused look and shook my head. Tara has been the last thing on our minds and last word of conversation over the past few months. We’ve been so focused on them getting to know Jamie, she hasn’t come up, and I was thankful for it. I didn’t want to hear about her, “I’m going to murder them in their sleep and have Gage and Drew be my alibi.” She mumbled as she shook her head, “Girl, you need to get with the times with this situation. We’ve known Tara for years, and she’s always been a pathological liar. She’s had her eyes set on Archer for years, before you even came into the picture, but he never showed her any interest. Then you come along, making him go all goo-goo eyes on you. She was super jealous when it came to you because you snagged the one guy she couldn’t get her fake nails into.”

“He slept with her though…I can’t be mad because we weren’t together, but she was enticing enough to sleep with.”

“But did he?” she questioned, “Did he really sleep with her?”

“He said…”

“Last he told me about the situation was he was out with the guys and drinking. She went to them and asked for a dance, and when he said no, she bought everyone shots. He told me he woke up in bed with her next to him. He was wearing boxers and she was naked.”

“That to me sounds like they slept together. He found a condom wrapper and a filled condom in the bathroom. At least he had the mind to wrap himself.”

“Think about it. Really, really think about it. Does that sound like Archer to be so reckless? No. It’s not him. Do you remember what happened in our senior year when it came to her and Joel, the captain of the hockey team?” I shook my head no, “He claimed that she drugged him when they were at a party after winning one of their games. He woke up with her in bed, used condom on the floor and all. He freaked out because he never wanted her. He was a virgin and was saving himself for someone special.”

I sat there for a moment and really took it in. Did she really do that crap again?

“Do you think…”

“Remember when he went to his parents and told them what happened, they took him to the doctor to get tested for STD’s and then called the police to file a report. Joel grabbed the condom that was left and took it with him just in case because he didn’t want her to take his sperm and try to baby trap him, since he was a huge prospect for college hockey, and he wanted to go into the NHL, and well, his parents are loaded. I mean, we know that the spermies wouldn't have lived, but at that age? He wouldn't know. And the police went to her place and arrested her and took her in for questioning.”

“Oh my gosh, Is that why she wasn't in school?” she nodded at my outburst as my head snapped up, and my eyes went wide. I couldn’t believe I forgot all about that. “She wasn’t allowed in our school and had to complete her schooling at home, and she couldn’t even graduate.”

“Bingo. Do you know why not a lot of people know what happened?” I shook my head, “That’s because her parents kept it all hush hush but I’m a busy body and I like to know things.” She grinned, “The condom was filled with lube, lotion and clear gel, a mixture she made to make it look like sperm, and finally, she admitted to never having s*x with him. She wanted him and her to be together, and she thought doing this would force him into a relationship.”

“Do you think she’s stupid enough to do the same thing though?” I asked.

“Of course she is.” She laughed, “Archer woke up with his boxers on and no memory of sleeping with her. He drinks like a fuckin’ sailor and can out drink most of the guys. It’s hilarious to watch them try, so, for him to take a few shots and black out? That’s not him. He was drugged, I’m sure of it. And she wanted to baby trap him and made him think it was his. But Jo…I can promise you that b***h isn’t in the picture.”

“She’s not? I thought she had the baby and…”

“What made you think that?” she asked, “Has anyone made any indication to you that he was with her and has a family?”

“No. I mean, Hannah and Austin said he hasn’t dated and…”

“He hasn’t. We’ve tried to set him up with people, but he always gets out of it, or he goes and never calls them. Tara isn’t in the picture, I promise. Hell, she never even had a kid.” She shook her head and I just looked at her, surprised, “That’s a different story and Archer can tell you that one, but I have a feeling, and they’re usually right, that she was behind those messages, and I’m going to prove it.”

“How?”

“My man is a master hacker and can do almost anything. Do you mind if I take the phone with me when we go back to give it to him?”

“No.”

“Perfect.” She grinned, “But Jo, listen to me when I say this. He loves you, he never stopped. I can see it in his eyes. He doesn’t know, I know, but he still has your prom picture in his bedroom. He has your senior picture in his wallet and whenever someone brings you up, it physically hurts him. He’s doing stupid s**t right now that affects the family and himself. Jo, he's taken up boxing, which isn't a problem, but he's being reckless about it. He's physically hurting himself, but I think with you coming back, he’s going to revert back to the cousin I miss. Now, my question to you is, do you have someone special, romantically, in your life?”

“No. Never. He was…he was the last person I was with. He was the only person I was ever with...” I blushed at that statement. What they didn’t know was Archer and I, when we were together, went at it like rabbits. We were really good at hiding it and the memories of our times together flooded my mind.

“Do you still love him?” she whispered.

I sat there for a moment and took a pause. I looked out into the clear sky, let out a content sigh and slowly turned to her. And with a small smile, I whispered, “I never stopped,” as a tear ran down my cheek.

“Then, my sister, literally, sisters, you are going to get your man back and everything is going to be okay.”

“How do you know?”

“Because you two were always meant to be. We all saw it. It just wasn’t the right time for you both years ago, but now, now is the right time. You have both grown up and matured for the most part. You both have lived life away from one another and know what it's like for the other to not be there. Does it suck?"

"Yeah. Every day without him has been terrible, but I've made it work the best I could. I tried my best to give Jamie the life he deserves, but it was never enough."

"And I think, no, I know once you two talk and get all those misunderstandings out in the open, you two can be together again. Besides, once Archer meets his mini me, which is beyond creepy how much they look alike by the way, he’s going to fall even more in love with you for having his child.”

“Yeah, but we will never be like what we were.”

“You’re right. You won’t…” she turned and looked out into the distance, “But you guys could be better…”

After dinner, Austin and Tristian took the first load back to Crossdale to take it to the house we were renting. I guess it was Aiden’s from what they told me, which is nice since I’ll kind of know who my landlord is. Taylor stayed the night, and we spent most of the night talking, laughing, crying and just being with each other. It was so good to have her back in my life and if this is how one person feels, then I can’t wait to fix my relationships with everyone.

And it was the next morning when I woke up to a series of text messages that really made my decision to go to Crossdale early and meet with everyone before Nick and Jamie came into town.

Ray: I love you, Jo. Mom talked to me because she needed a shoulder, and she told me….things, everything. I promise you, Dylan and I, Jordan and Summer, we wer NOT mad. We love you very much, and we want you home. Please, come home. BTW, mom gave us your number, so you’re about to be bombarded.

Dylan: I want to meet my nephew soon, but first, I need one of your magical hugs. It’s been way too long. Five and a half years too long. I’ll help work on Lil’ D, but we have your back.

Jordan: Our girl! Dylan couldn’t keep his mouth shut and told me the amazing news and that you have a little surprise for us? Cookies? I love cookies! Maybe a cake, but small enough for just me, so the kids won’t have some. I’ll eat it in the closet or something. But most importantly, you, home, wine, girls, tears. It needs to happen.

Summer: All I’m going to say is that he loves you. He never stopped, Jo, so put those insecurities that I know you have right now and make them leave your mind. Believe me when I say that. It might be hard at first when you come home. There will be lots of yelling and tears, but at the end of the day, the feelings are still there. We all love you so much. And I can’t wait to meet your son (Jordon doesn't know, by the way. We're keeping that secret to ourselves lol). But, I think it might be best if you come first and talked to everyone before you bring Jamie…the intense drama might be a bit much for him.

As I read that last line, I knew Summer was right. The drama would be too much for Jamie. He wouldn’t understand why people were yelling and crying. He would want to fix things, my little fixer. So, later that afternoon when Nick came home from work, I sat him and Taylor down and talked to them.

“I think…I think...tomorrow Taylor should go home, and I should go with her.” I whispered, playing with the hem of my shirt, “Summer texted me, and she made a good point.”

“What did she say?” Taylor asked, linking her hand with mine.

“That maybe I should come home first and talk to Archer and everyone before Jamie comes. That way, it’s less drama, and he’s not around the awkwardness and yelling.”

“She’s smart.” Nick crossed his arms over his chest, “Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

And that’s where we are now. I’m standing on the front stairs with my bag in my hand, Friday morning, with Taylor bouncing in the front seat of her car, excited about this drive home and to see what happens.

“Jo, are you sure?” Nick asked again.

“Yeah. I’m sure. You two can spend some time together before you come down tomorrow night. I just…I need this one day to talk to them. Taylor already has the girls planning something and tomorrow, tomorrow you can come down with Jamie. Tristian, I’m sure, already has the house set up because that’s how he is and Austin helped him.”

“COME ON! LET’S GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD, FIRECRACKER!” Taylor yelled from the window as she stood up, most of her body outside the car. I laughed at her as she slapped the roof of the car, telling me to hurry and the memory of her calling me Firecracker back in high school. Gosh, I love this girl.

“I guess that’s my queue.” I whispered, going up to Jamie, “You be good for Uncle Nick, alright?”

“Yes mama.” He smiled, “Uncle Nick is going to take me shopping to get presents for grandmas and grandpas and one for my daddy too!”

“Is he really?” I smiled as I looked up at Nick.

“I am.” He nodded, “But I’ll show you first before Jamie gives it to him. But go, before you change your mind because you’re a chicken shit.” He laughed. Well, he wasn't wrong. I am.

And with timid steps, I made my way to the car and slid into the passenger seat, buckled myself in, and Taylor started down the road back home to Crossdale.

And at that moment, that was the start of my forever. Whether or not he’s going to be in my life, I don’t know, but I have the rest of my family and that’s all I need.