One more time : Where Oblivion meets Obsession

#25 – KARMA HITTING BACK

Shahmeer carefully strained his eyes in the dim light and he was sure her back was covered in stitches, scratches, even bullet wounds and many more stories. 'Who are you?' The question was driving him insane.

He heard some shuffling and he felt his life returning back to his body when Myra opened her eyes.

She tried hard to register what was happening but failed.

"Relax!" He said softly. "There will be dizziness for some time until the blood circulation to the brain is restored." He said but it was too much to grasp for a half-conscious person.

"W-What... y... you doing?" She whispered with slurred speech. She was so inaudible that if her face wasn't right next to her, he might have not heard her.

"Saving 'us'. I realized just now, there is no Shahmeer without you. Every breath that came, proved how difficult it was without you." He replied but it didn't matter anyway. She wasn't comprehending anything.

"S...ave? Don't save. Death... bring me peace." She replied after picking his words and trying hard to form proper sentences.

"You really believe you want to die... but in reality, you want to be saved. You know what can save you... heal you... love. Let me love you."

"If you love... me, it'll be like throwing things in a b...black h...ole. *breathes loudly* It'll just... disappear and you'll get nothing. I'm empty, selfish and uncaring. Don't do this to yourself." She said weakly managing to keep her eyes open. Somehow, somewhere, she wanted the best for him. He saved her life, took care of her all these days.

Never in all these days did he see this side of her. A soft, vulnerable, broken soul. When she is in her senses, how careful she is, with her words, actions, even her expressions.

"Myra You can reject me, get away from me, abandon me, but there is nothing you can do to make me forget you."

She comfortably snuggled more into him with closed eyes. Shahmeer felt like his heart would swell with happiness and rip his skin at this gesture. "Shahmeer You can stop me, chase me, imprison me, but there is nothing you can do to make me love you and forget him." Now her voice was getting audible.

"I don't want you to forget him. I know you can love me and his memories together. You can do that."

"Men can't stand that. Their love is filled with possession, jealousy, desire, ego, lυsτ, demands."

"Then that is not love. Love is not so. It is not envious, proud, or selfish. It is accepting the person the way they are... with their flaws, sins, past and present, pieces and whole. It is forgiving, patient, trustworthy and strong. At least my love is."

“But I don't want you. I don't want relationships. I am his, in body and soul. So, leave me alone before I hurt you, and you'll be added to the long list of people I hurt or betrayed. You should walk away now.”

"Too late for that. Well, I could spend the whole night reasoning with you but you shouldn't. That's it for today. Quiet." He ordered and she went quiet.

He kept gazing at her. He didn't want this pleasant moment to end. This might be the last time they were together, so close. He might never get to hold her, to love her, even see her once they were apart. The little hope in his heart was still alive that she would agree but it was being hit badly by her honest words. It was for sure that she has been bruised, wounded emotionally, physically, psychologically badly. Would his love ever be able to overpower her cautious, untrusting instincts and make her trust him? He breathed a heavy sigh and weakly closed his battling eyelids, letting sleep take over him. She was safe now; he could sleep peacefully.

***

Shahmeer's lips were curved into a smile, his eyes opened expecting the familiar fruity fragrance but it didn't come. His eyes shot open and he shuffled getting up quickly to find himself alone in the blanket. Where did she go? His eyes scanned the place and found her all dressed up placing her tablets in her coat pocket. His eyes widened as realization dawned upon him. She was leaving forever. He slid on his Jeans and t-shirt and ran upstairs. He wanted to say something but no words came out of his mouth. What was he expecting? That she would stay here forever? That she would actually love him? She would be a part of his Madness? His crazy world? Still, he asked, "What are you doing?"

She gave him a grim look without answering him and continued putting on her leather shoes.

"Myra you can't leave." He said holding her wrist. Her head snapped towards him and her eyes held such loneliness, pain. All he wanted in that moment was to take her pain away and make her happy. Replace that frown on her forehead with a smile on her lips. "Shahmeer thank you for everything and sorry if I said something rude or terrible last night."

"You... you don't remember anything?"

She shook her head. "Doesn't matter. You will always be..." she paused to find proper words, "a good memory."

Memory? That's it? That's all I am? Not an acquaintance? not a friend? no one special? A memory? The thought set him on fire. He pushed her both arms and pinned her on the side wooden wall. Before her mind could register what was happening, his lips crashed against hers giving her no escape. Her eyes widened and within a second, she pushed him away.

"What are you doing!" Her angry voice came out weaker than it should.

"Giving you more of this memory." He breathlessly whispered against her earlobe capturing her lips again. This time she closed her eyes and welcomed that feeling. Not that the battle between her heart and mind was settled but it had gone numb at this action.

"Ask me to stop Myra." He breathed helplessly pulling off the leather belt from her waist. "Make me stop." He murmured again, ripping her top buttons. "Push me away!" He breathed against her bare chest. She closed her eyes and her fists clawed into the wooden wall and gathered some consciousness and whispered, "Shahmeer stop!" She had to stop him now. Otherwise, there would be no stopping for both of them and that would leave him broken and lonely.

His lips stopped and moved away helpless that very instant. His eyes still held the desire for her.

Men throwing themselves at her was nothing new or bothering for Myra. But his touch ignited a longing within her. She was angry at herself for this. No man can have this effect on me! She reminded herself. How could I allow this? How could I feel this way?

She stared back into those deep eyes, stood on her heels to reach his height and hugged him tight. He was taken aback by this gesture but wrapped his arms around her.

"Why Shahmeer why? Why did you have to make it more difficult for me than it already is huh?" She whispered in a dejected voice caressing his hair. Shahmeer was about to say something when sharp pain shot through his neck. He pulled her away with a look of betrayal in his eyes but she was unaffected. He knew there was no use of struggle as he would pass out in thirty to forty seconds so he just gave away. She threw the syringe away and held his arm, guiding his faltering steps to the bed a few steps away. As she moved away, He held her wrist and pulled her fiercely causing her to fall on his broad frame.

"This time, I won't come after you, you will. We're meant to be." He said softly before completely sinking into darkness.

"No, we're not." She murmured, settling his unconscious form properly on the bed and wrapping a duvet over him. "Thank you for everything. Stay safe." She murmured before giving him a last look.

***

Lucky enough, Myra spotted Bryan in a cab going somewhere around the highway. His happiness knew no bounds as he walked towards her and she hugged him tight.

"I am so sorry Bryan. I know it must have created a lot of problems but what could I do? I lost all means of communication and was unconscious for days."

"How did you come in here?" He said looking around.

She did not want anyone to know anything about Shahmeer. That would land him in trouble or make them suspicious about her. "Some things are best kept secret. Please Bryan, don't ask questions." She requested. "Just tell me the story, we have to tell everyone. I want to go home now." She shook her head exhausted, emotionally and physically.

He nodded. "Come." He said looking around for a cab. He wasn't used to seeing Myra in this state which got him worried and curious.

"Everyone left Indonesia?" She could talk about the mission as long as no one was around.

"Yah. They had to report back. Rose survived with a bullet in her leg. The place we found is destroyed. Most of the people are saved and guards captured there are being tortured for information. And I stayed back because you were badly injured in the crash, lying comatose at a hospital."

She nodded. "You're sure we can trust Devraj on this? He or his team won't give away anything?"

"His team doesn't know anything. Only he does and my instincts say he can be trusted."

"I'm not so much into instincts Bryan."

"I know Myra. But let's just not worry about that right now. I'll get you a new secure phone soon. Anything else?"

"No."

"Feeling good?" Bryan asked, just to kill the uncomfortable silence in the cab.

"If merely 'feeling good' could do it, drυg intake or drunkenness would be the most supremely divine human experience.” She said in a monotone.

No matter how much she wanted, she couldn't get Shahmeer's clawing thoughts and words out of herself.

This time, I won't come after you,

you will.

We're meant to be.

It was like he had not whispered those words into her ear, but pushed them into her heart. The longing that his touch left... It was not her lips he kissed, but set vibrations that travelled from her skin, through her bones to reach her soul.

"Bryan..."

"Hm?"

"Have you ever been in love?

"A few nights love yes. Forever love... no."

"Good. It's horrible. It makes you so vulnerable. It tricks you into opening up yourself, your heart in front of someone. Letting that person get inside you and totally jumble you up.”

"My God! Is there someone?" He asked shocked, well aware of Myra's nature. She would never utter an alphabet of nonsense or philosophy. Now when she just had too much in her heart, it was pouring out.

'She surely would have blown him off. No matter how much it hurt her.' He thought.

Myra sighed. Her tongue slipped. She knew Bryan would keep asking for the same question till he got an answer. She shouldn't have started the conversation in the first place. Now when she has done it, she has to end it properly.

"Some things are just not meant to be Bryan. He was just an illusion... something that you cannot reach, touch or hold."

"No dear. Trust yourself. Trust the universe. Whatever happens, it happens for a reason. Every person we meet, has a reason for coming into our life." He said, giving her a side hug. "And just remember, if you ever decide to act on it, you'll find me and Shermon by your side no matter what the consequences."

"Thanks." She mumbled. "Wake me when we reach the Airport."

***

Zain this is too much! You're in second grade. How can you still have problems writing alphabet?" Yousuf hissed at his six-year-old son.

"What's going on here?" Nisha walked into the hall with tea and biscuits.

"Nothing. Just my son being nuts." He said roughly holding his fingers around Zain's little fingers wound around the pencil. Zain looked like he was on the verge of crying.

"Don't be so hard on the little boy Yousuf. I can teach him to write." Nisha said gently pulling Zain towards her which he moved with a smile.

"Look here Zain. I'll show you a magic trick." Nisha said in an excited tone and Yousuf watched amused.

"See what this is? Magic lines.

This is a standing line-|,

Slanting lines-/

Sleeping line- —

Curvy lines - )(.

And you know the magic is... by a combination of any of these, you can write any letter of the alphabet. You don't have to learn them or practice them. For example, H is a

Standing line-sleeping line-standing line." He seemed to grasp a little and after a few attempts, the pout on his face broke into a smile.

"Now tell me A is..." Nisha asked.

"A is slanting line-sleeping line-slanting line." Zain said actually writing the letter properly.

"Ok... D?" Nisha asked again.

"standing line-curvy line! Wow!" He chirped, clapping his tiny fingers together.

"Very good. Now complete the rest of it in your room." She said and Zain jumped away.

"Thank you for the help Nisha." Yousuf said, grateful. "After Meena, you have been a true mother to him."

"Yousuf I was his mother even when Meena was alive." She said sadly. "Even though you people don't trust me, I love you all." She said sadly and he knew exactly what she was talking about.

He turned his face away.

"Why do you need to hide the fact that something went wrong with Myra?"

"Because you are…" he composed proper words which would least hurt her. "You put your duty before us. You're more loyal to the UDO than us Nisha. If you had broken the report to them, we would have really lost Myra." He reasoned.

"And now what? Myra is safe?"

"Yes, she is! They're going to be here any minute."

Before the words finished, Myra's words and Bryan's laughter rang through the hall. "Koi hai? Swagat nahi karoge hamara?" (Anyone here? Won't you welcome us?)

Hindi... Totally directed towards Nisha!

Nisha held back a smile and hugged Myra tight. She looked at Bryan with longing but didn't say anything. She stayed like that for a few minutes and Myra let her. "Nish! You alright?" She asked.

"I am now." Nisha replied. She may be professional at times but that was mistaken as her selfish attitude. They thought she wanted to garner praises and be the most trusted member of the organization but she wasn't.

"Okay. I know you were in a coma. So, no need to run a mental scan through you." She followed their story wiping her tears and leaving from there while Yousuf looked on.