Saving Justice

Chapter Eight

I watch Cole arranging his clothes inside the cabinet of his hotel room while I hug his pillow on my belly. He finally reached his lodging in San Francisco after almost six hours since I left the airport. It's already half-past eight in the evening here, and since Illinois is two hours ahead, it's only six in the afternoon there in San Francisco.

I remain quiet and wait for him until he's done.

I have decided to call him inside our room for privacy before going to Justice's room. She still needs me to sleep with the lights off, but I can tell that she's slowly getting used to it already.

I'm not usually this clingy that I'd want to Facetime with Cole when it's been only six hours since we separated, but I badly need someone to talk to. He's a family member of Justice, and I trust him. He's the best person I can lean on. Too bad that he's almost two thousand and one hundred miles away from me right now.

The red scars and marks on Justice's wrist keep on appearing inside my head. I can't get over it, even though I've seen worse than that. It bothered me more because it's from Justice.

"Why is my fiancée wearing such a long face?" Cole baby talks to me after he's done fixing his things and emptying his luggage, chuckling like he's preparing for another sweet line.

I frown at him, hinting that it's not the right time to joke around. And being the best fiancé that he is, he immediately gets serious when he read the mood.

"What happened?" Now, he sounds worried. "I just got here, and now your face is telling me to come home to you already."

Well, I can't deny that. If that's possible, I want Cole here with me, but I won't let myself be a distraction. Once I'm done talking to him about my worries, I'm sure I'll be fine already. There's no need to cause him too much trouble and waste money going back and forth.

"Is this about Justice again?" He makes the right guess.

Sighing, I nod my head.

He sighs, too. "Did something happen during your session?"

Once again, I nod.

"You're stressing yourself too much again because of Justice," he tells me. "Try to take it easy, babe."

"How will I take it easy?" I ask him, a bit frustrated because he's taking this lightly. "Aren't you worried about her? She's your cousin, Cole!"

"Calm down, babe. Of course, I'm worried about her." He tries to calm me with his soothing voice. "Like what you said, she's my cousin. She's a family. Why won't I be worried?"

"Then, why do I feel like you're taking this too lightly?"

"I'm not taking this lightly. I just don't want to feed your anxiety by sympathizing with you and agreeing on your sentiments," Cole explains calmly, even though I'm already starting to raise my voice at him. "Justice is important to me. I'm worried about her and her mental health. But I'm worried about you, too, babe. You're the most important person in my life. You know that."

He looks at me from the screen with his sincere eyes, pleading for my understanding.

"Please, let's not argue about this, Venice..." he says. "I don't want us to fight while I'm away."

Now that I'm starting to see and understand his intention clearly, I feel guilty for trying to start a fight with him. I guess I'm just really concerned about Justice's mental health, especially her suicidal tendencies.

He's right. I'm anxious about it. If he sympathizes with me, I'll only worry more.

"I'm sorry..." I brush my hair with my fingers and exhale a deep breath. "You're right. I'm sorry."

"I understand," he says and smiles a bit. "Don't worry about it, babe."

For a moment, I look down, avoiding his stare from the screen. My eyes dart on my wrist. It's like I can picture the symbol of Justice's trials to call for help on mine. I close my fist.

"She hurt herself, Cole..." I spoke so quietly that I almost couldn't hear my own voice. "I saw the marks on her wrist with my own eyes."

This time, Cole can't keep his cool. His lips part.

"I'm alarmed by her attempts to inflict pain on herself, Cole," I tell him what worries me the most. "She also admits that she has suicidal thoughts all the time like she wants to follow her parents and her brother."

"Babe..." His gentle voice warms my heart. "That's why you're there."

I stare at him. What does he mean by that?

"That's why you're doing this, right?" he reminds me of the purpose of the counseling that I'm doing to Justice. "You'll guide her out of that dark path. I know you can do it. I trust that you can."

God, thank you so much for Cole. Words are not enough to explain how thankful I am that he came into my life. I will forever be in debt to the Heavens for letting me have him.

Feeling so much better now, I smile and nod.

I know exactly why I'm feeling anxious. It's because I feel like Justice's life is in my hands. It doesn't help that the news I heard yesterday about Saddie's late client is making me feel a bit pressured. I don't want Justice to end up like him. But hearing how much Cole believes in me restores the faith I have for myself that I lost for a moment.

If I can help other people make peace with their minds, Cole does the same thing to me. Every time things get tough for me, he'll always be there to give me advice.

This is the independence that I believe in. Ever since I left home to transfer to Illinois, I have learned what it's like to be independent. But when I met Cole, I also learned that it's okay to rely on others. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It's a sign of bravery. Be strong enough to stand on your own feet, but know when to put your pride down and ask for help when you know you need it.

•••

I'm holding Justice's hand as we enter the establishment. We're going to meet Emily at the café, where I met her last week with Cole, for the third appointment. Earlier this morning, I asked Justice to come with me. This will be a part of her therapy. Hopefully, it'll be a huge step to help her start socializing again with other people other than me and the Griffins. It's a good thing that she actually agreed to come.

"Emily!" I wave at Emily, who always arrives a few minutes earlier.

Since we're already formally introduced to each other and have established a good relationship, she remains seated as she waves back at me with a smile—no need for formalities.

"Good afternoon!" she greets me and glances at Justice. "Is she your sister?"

"Nope." I shake my head. "She is Cole's younger cousin and Eleanor's niece, Justice."

"Oh!" She then offers a hand to Justice. "Nice to meet you, dear."

I sure look proud when Justice returns her handshake and greets Emily properly. That's already a huge improvement! She wouldn't even properly look at me when we first met, except when she introduced herself. I just hope that she isn't pushing herself too much.

"I hope you don't mind that I brought her with me," I say while I take the seat beside Justice.

"There's no problem about that, Venice. Don't worry."

I smile at her. "If that's the case, thank you."

Before starting our meeting, I ordered drinks and pastries for us three. While waiting for it to be ready for pick up at the counter, Emily told me that she had already secured the slot in Starved Rock on October 28 for our wedding and showed me the receipt for the 50 percent downpayment. Honestly, it is expensive, but Cole and I can manage. Although we don't have a tight budget for our wedding, we still need to be a bit frugal because we still have to look for our new home and pay for the deposits.

I'm proud to say that I actually saved a decent amount of money from my scholarships, allowances, and income. I don't really spend much. My priority is to save money for my future because I want to be financially stable before starting a family. I want to provide for my future children's needs without worrying about our finances.

"Venice!" the staff on the counter calls out my name, indicating that our order is all ready.

It interrupted our conversation.

I'm about to stand up when Justice suddenly bolts up. "Let me get it, Venice," she suddenly volunteers.

"A-are you sure?" I stutter because I didn't anticipate her willingness to volunteer.

She nods her head, then looks at Emily. "Excuse me." After she excuses herself, she straightly walks over to the counter with the receipt. I watch her from a distance, worried that she might suddenly have an anxiety attack. But then I see her exchanging a pleasant conversation with the barista as she gets our tray of drinks. She even gets him to help her carry the pastries because she can't carry both trays.

Well, I have to admit that Justice is a beauty. She is a beautiful brunette with a slightly tanned skin tone. I'm sure men will be willing to help her if she needs it. They might even volunteer without the need to ask.

As far as I can remember, her brother's also a handsome man. I think it runs in their blood. Now that I think of it, Cole mentioned that their mother is a Filipina. That must be the reason why they have a unique feature.

"What a good kid." I hear Emily whisper before Justice is back with the staff who helps her.

Feeling proud, I smile. She really is a good kid that you must protect at all costs.

The meeting continued as we indulged in our orders. We decided on the color palette we're going to use, and since fall is the main theme of the wedding, we went for a brown color palette. #2423: a combination of pastel, beige and dark shades of brown. And of course, we also included white, which is considered the color of perfection when it comes to weddings.

I was considering a different palette, consisting of bright yellow, orange, and brown colors, but Justice told me her opinion. She actually helped me a lot in deciding. Emily even praised her for having a good eye and joked that I should always bring her to our meetings.

•••

"I'm glad that Justice is a great help to you." Eleanor also looks proud of Justice after I told her what happened during our meeting with Emily.

Nodding my head, I can't stop myself from smiling. I'm feeling so euphoric because of Justice's notable improvements and approachable demeanor earlier. It helps that she finally lets go of some of her worries and opens up about her pain. It must have helped her feel lighter after carrying that heavy burden of pain for two years.

But I should not be too complacent. Even if Justice seems to start doing well, it's not a reason to slack off. Instead, I should do better so that she will heal continuously.

"I'm actually planning to take her again with me next weekend," I tell Eleanor my plans. "I have a scheduled meeting with a designer for my bridal gown and bridesmaid dresses. Aubrey recommended him to me because he was the one who designed her sister's bridal gown three years ago, and it's actually a fine gown."

"Hmm... I have nothing against it, but their final exams are scheduled next week," Eleanor says. "If Justice says that she can compromise, then no problem."

Oh, right. We have reached the second week of May. The seniors usually take their finals exams in the second to the third week of May, days earlier than the other year levels. It just hits me that Justice and Natalie are graduating soon.

"Eleanor, how are Justice's grades?" I ask her because I have no idea how good or bad she performs at school.

I have a client who's currently at college, and she's having a hard time with her studies because of her anxieties. She couldn't concentrate and focus so well that she failed one of her courses. I wonder if it's the same for Justice.

"Justice?" Eleanor smiles. "Justice has good grades. She's actually one of the top students running for honors."

"Wow..." I'm speechless.

That explains why she's very articulate. She's a top student, and her grades are thriving. She's an intelligent kid. That means her mental health disorders aren't in the way of her studies.

I wonder what other things I don't know yet about Justice. I only know a little information about her. I should try harder and get to know her more.