Hawk

19 - How could anyone do that?

Brooke

“...In a corner on her own.”

“And she was singing to herself?”

Maria and I are discussing Willow, and what happened at the school she works for this week. Apparently, it’s been all go. Willow is a teacher, and she teaches second grade, and the kids in her care love her. However, she does tend to get a little involved when she thinks one of those kids is having a rough time. I imagine, though, that most teachers do.

When I first met Willow, she was so lovely to me. She sat with me and told me stories about Hawk as a little boy. She told me how he was obsessed with archery and how he used to tell people if he could be any bird, it would be a hawk. I’d heard the story from Jack, but I listened because I loved to hear stories about the man I love.

Willow told me how Hawk was the kind of kid who liked to be alone. He liked to visit with his grandparents along with Roman, and how Roman, Hawk, and Pops would go fishing in the lake. I knew that, too, but it was one of those times where I would have heard the same stories ten times over and not complained. I would have listened because I felt happy.

Willow is a good woman, and the kids in her care mean as much to her as her own children. She treats them just as she would her own sons. I know if she’s worried about this little girl, something is terribly wrong.

“Willow said it was heartbreaking. The little girl was singing, ‘Nobody loves me. Everybody hates me. Only my grandma loves me. Somebody save me.’ Can you even imagine your child singing something like that in such a sad tone?”

I shake my head at Maria while looking over at Gabe in his baby chair. Little Jessica sits beside him, leaning into him and kissing his cheek again. I smile because Gabe is smiling at her. They love each other so much.

Gabe smiling at Jessie always makes her giggle, which makes him giggle. He only recently started laughing, and I can’t believe how beautiful he is. His little hazel eyes sparkle as he smiles at Jessica. She’s making crazy faces at him, blowing air into her cheeks and then pushing it out again with her tiny fists. Something her daddy taught her by doing the same thing to make her laugh.

She’s such an angelic little girl. So beautiful it overwhelms me. I’ve honestly never seen such a beautiful little girl. Jessie is the image of Maria, who herself is stunning in every way. Like Gabe, Jessie is so loved, well taken care of, and protected. Both babies will grow up knowing that no one will ever hurt them; they will and are told every day how loved they are.

Thinking about the little girl who believes nobody loves her brings tears to my eyes. I can’t imagine my little boy ever being so sad and lonely that he would sing to himself in a corner. That poor little girl must be hoping and praying that someone out there will take her away from all the pain.

“No,” I shake at Maria. “I don’t think my heart could take the pain. Has Willow brought what she knows to the attention of the right people?”

“Well,” Maria gets herself comfortable on the couch opposite the chair I’m sitting in as if she’s about to tell me some juicy gossip. I have to remind myself sometimes that Maria is a Mafia Princess, and whatever she’s about to tell me will likely shock me but be quite normal to her. “Willow told Hammer after he asked why she was holding their boys so tightly. Willow ended up telling him about the little girl; he then went and told Draven.

“It turns out the little girl’s parents had been verbally abusing her her whole life. They’d been physically beating the hell out of her since her older brother died three years ago. They blamed that baby for his death.”

My mouth hangs open in shock.

How can anyone blame a child for the death of a sibling?

That poor, innocent little girl. I don’t even know her, and I want to hug her and tell her that she is loved. No child should ever feel unloved. It’s breaking my heart to think about how many children there are in the world feeling the same way as the little girl in Willow’s class.

“Willow managed to get the little girl, Mallory, to open up to her. She was naturally afraid to speak against her parents, but Willow promised that baby she would be safe and nothing would ever happen to her again. Mallory told Willow everything her parents put her through. Poor little thing cried while telling Willow how her grandmother loved her. How she hugs and kisses her while telling her how much she is loved. Mallory said that her grandmother promised that she could live with her one day, and she’d be safe.”

“How is it that those people still have custody of Mallory? Has no one ever called social services?”

Surely, someone has noticed what's going on. I can’t imagine that the neighbors, at least, haven’t tried to help.

“What goes on behind closed doors stays there.” Maria shrugs. “Mallory had been conditioned not to say anything and to pretend she had a happy home. I’m guessing that something bad happened, and she couldn’t shake it off, and that’s why she was singing in the corner.”

I know that feeling all too well. My father would make sure Marnie and I never spoke about what happened in the privacy of our house. We were to make out like we had a wonderful home life. If anyone ever came looking because either of us had said something we shouldn’t, he would make us sorry. He made us sorry for breathing most days, and I was terrified of him.

As a little girl, how do you know that telling someone what’s happening will help?

How are you to know that it will all stop because you’ll be taken away to someplace safe?

I sure didn’t, so why would I think Mallory would?

I never felt safe one day in my childhood. There were moments when I believed what Marnie would tell me. One day, everything will be better. We would one day be free of Hank; no matter how long it took, Marnie would free us. We would have the life Marnie promised, even if it killed her in the process. But it was hard to keep that dream alive when the pain and suffering never ended.

I have the courage I have because of my sister. Yes, I am still afraid of Hank, and I think I always will be. You don’t just get over a lifetime of physical and mental abuse in a few months. It takes years, if it ever happens at all. I am moving forward with my life. Marnie gave me the strength to do that.

I am capable of many things. I know my own mind and heart, and I will always be true to myself. But I am not healed, and I am a long way from it. Even with therapy, I don’t think I can move on from what happened until my sister is safe and away from those people. Marnie is so selfless and does not deserve the life she was given. I want my sister home with me because it’s my turn to take care of her.

Is that too much to ask?

Hawk has offered to go over to Marnie’s and bring her to me. God knows I want that more than anything. I also know it isn’t the right thing to do. I will not have anyone kidnap my sister, even if it is for the right reasons.

Maria said that Draven could deal with things once and for all. By that, she means Draven would kill Marnie’s husband and our entire family. We could be together then. But for all my family has done to hurt us, I cannot bring myself to hurt them. I don’t want that on my conscience. I will not become someone I’m not. I will not be like Hank.

I will get Marnie away from Paul, but I will do it my way. Not everything needs to be solved with violence. I just wish the men around me understood the same thing.

“To cut a long story short, Draven was told, and Mallory is now living with her grandmother.” Maria smiles.

“I know you wanted to cut the story short, but how the hell did that happen?” I’m not sure I want to know, but deep down, my curiosity is getting the better of me.

“Mallory’s parents wanted to go out for the night, so Mallory was having a sleepover at her grandma’s. Her parents died in a house fire that night, and grandma now has custody.” Draven had them killed. I’m not even going to acknowledge it. “Willow went to check on things today, and she said she’s never seen Mallory smile so wide.

“Mallory knows her parents have died and that she’ll now be living with her grandmother permanently. Willow said Mallory was a little sad that her parents are gone but so happy that she’ll be safe and loved now.”

“Isn’t that what it’s all about? Seeing a child smile. I couldn’t imagine Gabe being so sad he would sing something like that to himself.”

“Hey,” Maria reaches over and takes my hand in hers. “It made you think of your childhood, didn’t it?” I smile slightly, neither confirming nor denying. “I’m sorry you suffered the way you did, but it’s over now, Brooke. You have a beautiful family of your own now. You are safe, sweetheart, and your son will have a wonderful life thanks to you.”

I smile and hug her. “I know you’re right. I’m just so happy that Mallory is safe.”

“She always will be.” Maria pulls away from me. “My brother is going to make sure of it.”

Somehow, I knew she was going to say that. Although, I am so glad right now that he is. It means Mallory and her grandmother will want for nothing, and that little girl will always be with the woman who loves her.