The Oracle

CHAPTER FIVE: HE HATES ME

Synthia’s POV

I looked at myself in the mirror. It was the morning after my supposed to be wedding night and instead of having the ‘just married’ glow, I had bags under my eyes because of the lack of sleep, and my eyes were swollen and red rimmed due to crying.

I took a shower in cold water, trying to refresh my tired eyes. It didn’t seem to work, and I gave up on my appearance. I should just focus on keeping a cheerful appearance in front of everyone since I didn’t want anyone to know anything before I could solve any issues that Aiden had with me. Determined to start my plan of wooing my husband, I dressed up, pasted a smile on my face and marched downstairs to the dining hall.

On reaching there, I found everyone else already in the breakfast table except my husband. My smile faltered for a moment before I regained my spirits and sat near Sophie. Seeing me, she smiled mischievously.

"Oh! Look who is finally here? The brand new Luna! Aww... Looks like someone was too busy to sleep yesterday!" she cooed at me.

I tried to form an appropriate blush at her innuendo while I actually felt like crying my heart out to my best friend. I have never kept any secrets from her in my life till day except the fact that I cared for Aiden more than everyone imagined I did.

Thankfully, the discussion in the table shifted to an alliance to be formed with a neighboring pack and I heaved a sigh of relief.

I waited for Aiden to join us for breakfast, but he never did. Seems like waiting was all I did nowadays when it came to the matter of my charming husband. I couldn’t bring myself to eat anything and kept moving around the food on my plate. After excusing myself, I went to the kitchen, prepared a plate heaped with the dishes, grabbed a cup of coffee and added sugar and cream just how Aiden used to have it. Then, I went in search of my husband. I found him in the Alpha’s office, just like I expected. I paused for a moment, gathered courage and then knocked at the door. He stiffened for a moment and then ordered me to get inside. I looked around his office for a moment. I haven’t been to his office much before now. Then, I looked at my husband and for a moment I hoped that he would offer me an explanation as to why he didn’t come to our room yesterday and apologize to me. However, looking at his impatient face, I knew that there was no chance of that happening. So, I plastered a bright smile on my face. 

"I brought you breakfast since you didn’t come to the dining hall to have it. Here is coffee too! You would definitely need it after working all night. God knows I need a bucket of the liquid heaven when I miss my beauty sleep! You would too, right?” I announced.

He flinched hearing my nonsense blabbering, and I felt myself turning red from embarrassment. I tended to spout out nonsense when I was nervous. I should have just kept my stupid mouth shut.

He shook his head at me before speaking.

"There is no need. I have already had the servants bring me breakfast. From now on, don’t come to the office and disturb me," he replied.

Then, he looked back at the papers in front of him and I was dismissed, just like that.

I stood like a fool for a moment and seeing that he had no intention to continue the conversation with me; I left the room dejectedly and wandered out. I strolled outside, feeling the breeze. Sitting in the shade of a tree, I closed my eyes and introspected. What was going on with my life? Where did it go wrong? Now, how shall I make it right?

After a while, I felt a little calm. Nature always had such an effect on me. My mom used to joke that I am a nymph in human skin since I loved being around nature. I stood up and went back to my room only to discover that the half of the closet which contained Aiden’s closet was almost empty except for the few items kept there, as if to say that he still had a claim on this room.

I never expected this turn of the events. I just thought that he wanted to take his time to accept our marriage. It didn’t occur to me that he would want to avoid me to that extent that he didn’t even want to share the room with me. I felt numb all of a sudden and didn’t know what to think. Was this a joke?

I sat down on the bed and thought of what to do? Should I just talk to him? But on remembering his attitude, I was not ready to face him and his indifference, at least not yet. So, I just decided to wait and see when he would come back to his room since he couldn’t avoid coming to his own room forever. Well, that is what I thought, anyway.

But days went by with me staying alone in the room and hoping that this would be the day that my husband would get over whatever grudge he had on me and return to our room. Two days after our marriage, I came to know that he was staying in the room adjoined to the Alpha’s office where he was supposed to take rest when he was too tired after staying a late night in the office for filling up paper works or such. Even though I tried to put on a cheerful facade and keep my close ones from knowing these things, gossip soon spread like wildfire and it was apparent that everyone knew about Aiden staying in a separate room. Everyone was acting as if I was made of glass and started being careful around me and trying to cheer me up and avoid the topic of Aiden and our marriage. They just acted as if nothing was amiss and irrationally, I felt angry. I just wanted to open up to someone. I needed a hug from my Mom and I wanted to cry my heart out. I wanted my best friend to plan crazy plans to help me woo back my husband. But they just acted as if everything was rainbows and unicorns in the world, and I just hated it!

Two weeks passed by and there was no sign of Aiden returning to the room. He didn’t even come to the dining hall for the meals and it was as if he had cut off the outside world and shut himself inside his office. He didn’t even take part in the pack training and soon, the overall energy of the pack also dwindled due to the lack of presence and support of the alpha. There was a wild confusion everywhere, and though I was feeling utterly defeated already, even I could feel the anguish of the pack. I decided that I had to do something to fix the situation before it deteriorates and affect the entire pack, as it was my duty as his wife and the pack’s luna to set him straight. It was time to face my husband again.

So, on a fine day, two weeks after our marriage, I decided to clean myself up. I took a bath, dressed up and applied makeup carefully. Even though I looked tired and had already lost a little weight due to stress and lack of appetite, I looked better than the homeless person appearance I had been having these past days with my hazardous uncoordinated dressing, ungroomed snarly hair and unkempt look. By hook or crook, I had to make my husband realize that I loved him and I would be the best Luna for our pack.

Once again, I braved the kitchen and to the chef’s surprise as well as mine, successfully made blueberry pancakes, and served them on a plate with maple syrup. Then I took a glass of milk and went to my husband’s office.

On reaching the Alpha’s office, my mind began replaying the way he treated me the last time and before I could get cold feet, I quickly knocked on the door. On getting no response, I knocked once more. Then I nervously opened the door and peeked in. To my surprise, there was nobody inside the office. I was confused and after making sure that the coast was clear; I crept like a thief inside my husband’s office. I looked around the office to find papers scattered away messily and files covered in dust. It was a total mess. I turned and saw the door of the adjoining room ajar and went to inspect. I silently opened it and found Aiden still sleeping without even removing his shoes. I went closer and observed him. It was the first opportunity I had to watch him this close. He looked restless even in his sleep and looked no better than I did. I sighed and slowly removed his shoes, adjusted him to a comfortable position and put a comforter on him. He looked much more peaceful now. Seeing this, a smile formed on my lips. Oh, how I loved this man!

Then, I went back to the office and started the mission of cleaning it. I found a broom from the closet and swept the room, dusted everywhere and picked up the papers and began organizing everything. This went on for a while and when I was finishing off the job, I heard the door being opened and found a sleepy, mussed up and adorable looking Aiden yawning and walking into the office. I felt my heart melt on seeing him looking so innocent and beamed at him. He, however, stood still like a rock and looked around the room. Then he glanced at me and his emerald eyes were blazing furiously. I felt my smile vanishing from my face and I gulped nervously.

He hit the table scattering the papers I just so painfully stacked away and took a few steps towards me threateningly. Without being conscious of doing it, started walking backwards. I finally felt myself hitting the wall, and he caged me by putting his hands on both sides of my face.

"I remember I told you to not come here, right? Who gave you the authority to barge inside my office and do as you please?!" he growled at me.

I had longed to be in the arms of this man, but I never thought that when it finally happened, it would be like this. I trembled and tears brimmed in my eyes seeing the look in his which almost resembled hatred. But it couldn’t be, right?

I swallowed and tried to form a response.

"I thought.." I stuttered. 

"You thought what? That just because I married you, you have the reigns of my life? Then, you definitely thought wrong because you may be the luna of this pack, but you are my wife in name only and you would never be my mate! Just get that in your head and stay away from me!" he growled out and punched the wall behind my head and jumped in frustration. I jumped with fear, and he turned away.

"If you hate me so much, why did you marry me? You could have just refused when you were asked to marry me..." I asked him in an almost whisper.

He didn’t answer me, but I knew that he had heard me. With his werewolf senses, it was impossible for him not to hear it.

"I understand you wanted to find your true mate. I know alphas higher chances of getting true mates and you could have found her someday, but I promise I would be the best wife you could ever have. I would cook, clean, and be by your side as a good companion. I would do anything you want as long as you give me a chance. Please Aiden…" I trailed off as I realized that my pleas fell on deaf ears.

I swallowed my dignity and decided to tell him what mattered more than me and my feelings.

"The pack needs the Alpha. With great power comes great responsibility. You can’t just hide here for the rest of your life and shirk your responsibilities, or everything would get out of control soon. The pack is already in chaos and only you can get it back in form. Take care of the pack, Alpha!" I said.

Only our heavy breathing could be heard in the otherwise silent room. And then, without even a backward glance, he stormed out of the room.

After he left the room, my knees gave up, and I fell into the floor. Tears began falling down my face and I wept like a baby. I don’t know how much time passed before I gathered myself and left the room feeling like I just lose a piece of my soul. The thing that haunted me the most, that he didn’t deny it when I accused him of hating me. It was as if he really did hate me and I didn’t know what wrong I did other than love him. It was not my fault that he couldn’t find his true mate. He could have chosen not to marry me but he did and now, why was I being blamed and punished. I thought I was going to marry the love of my life and live a happy life, but what type of marriage was this where all I got was tears and hopelessness. So far, the only thing that changed is that I got to live in a new room and all this pain accompanying me.

The day after our confrontation, Aiden appeared for breakfast and he looked clean shaved and well. He acted as if I was nonexistent and went on about his day as if everything was normal. Even if I was being neglected, a small part of me felt hopeful since he heeded my words and came out of his self exile.

This became the normal pattern for the following days when he acted as if I was invisible and our marriage didn’t happen at all. However, he took care of the pack and training, and everything was back to normal except for me.

Days and then months passed by with me shamelessly still trying everything to gain his attention. I spent my days in the kitchen trying to cook and even became a good cook, but he never accepted anything I prepared. Slowly but surely, I was feeling hopeless in my ability to woo my husband.

Six months passed and my birthday came up. My family kept on trying to cheer me, but nothing worked. I was becoming a shell of the person I used to be. I even doubted it was my fault that he didn’t love me. Maybe I was not pretty enough? I should be more graceful? I hated myself for doubting myself, but I was no longer the confident, fun-loving girl I used to be. I hated myself when I felt jealous on seeing the affection between Sophie and Jared. I even felt envious seeing my own Mom and Dad. I was slowly turning into someone I couldn’t even recognize, who was filled with bitterness and hopelessness. So, on my birthday, when my family, including Sophie, tried to throw a surprise party for me, I lashed out at them and ran away to my room. I was even losing my best friend and family and it was nobody’s fault but mine for alienating them for my selfish reasons just because I couldn’t stand to see them happy when I was miserable.

Lying in my bed, I cried myself to sleep while like every other day these past months, the only words that mattered to me nowadays repeated in my mind like a mantra, 'He hates me!'