Thorns Of The Past.

In The 'Dark'...

I feel like I made a deal with the devil in the past and now... I am making it again, because I can't run away, he is chasing me and everything I've ever 'loved'!

~at the same time, too late at night, too far away~

Michelle’s pov

I open the door and get in his office silent and quite nervous.

I find him sitting on his chair behind his big, dark drown, wooden desk as always with the room quite dark. Only a small lamp to the right side of his desk is turned on and the light is not enough to enlighten the entire room.

I exhale shortly when my eyes meet his and I realize he is extremely angry. In all these years I know him, it is the first time his jaw is clenching and he hasn’t even talked to me which is something that terrifies me!

I know Damian for more than 16 years, from when I first came here! He was about 9 years old, the second son of the Alpha and our relationship was always good, we had no problems!

And now…

I don’t know what is happening but it can’t be good, if his gaze could kill me, it would!

I am sure we failed, again! I can’t think of any other reason for him to be so angry! He is always calm and strong, he never loses his temper, he is clever, the devil himself and I am glad he is the Alpha now after his father and older brother died in the last battle from that asshole!

Those two were never so clever or patient, they were rushing too much to take their revenge and they did everything wrong but now… I hope this changes although we have surely failed and I want to scream!

If she is still alive then…

“Come and sit!” he says firmly with a very husky tone that makes my skin shudder and I nod quickly.

I mustn’t frustrate him! If I lose his favor, I will be banished and his young brother is going to win! This stupid, spoiled boy was always against me and no matter how much I have tried, I never changed his mind. He tried lots of times to convince his father and brothers to expel me but I always had my ways…

I mean, sleeping with their father was easy and I was always taking care of his brothers, so they somehow ‘loved’ me, I became something like the mother they lost because of that bastard!

Anyway, I close the door behind me and walk to the seat right in front of his desk in hurry. I sit with my eyes locked on his and my wolf shakes her head disappointed, she feels she is still alive and I really want to break everything around me but I have to be smart, I have no other option!

Damian is not talking immediately, he is just staring at me and I hold my breath in agony. His expression is really scary, his big, dark green eyes are almost black, his short, dark brown hair is messy, the first buttons of his black shirt are open, his board chest is going up and down and I can see how much he is shaking. He is still beautiful I have to admit and the three days beard is really charming on him, it suites his age, he looks exactly 25 years old.

He clears his throat some seconds later and I stiffen impatiently on my seat, I am freaking out and he doesn’t care about it, he is more distant as the years pass! When he was a kid, I was his weakness, he had no secrets from me and now he is telling me only the basics…

He took the darkest path there is after his father and brother got killed about six years ago and he killed for revenge his mate that was in that battle on our enemy’s side… He is in bad mood all the time and I can say it hurts me a little bit, I don’t like this new Damian!

“NOBODY came back!” he says through his teeth and I lift my hands to place them on my trembling lips.

I blink my eyes for some times trying to believe my ears but the more I am thinking about it, the more difficult it is for me to accept it!

This can’t be happening! They were some of the best, they survived so many years of war with that bastard and now they couldn’t come back here? Not even one of them?

“What?” I whisper gasping and he leans forward shaking even more.

“THEY KILLED THEM ALL!” he replies ready to shift and attack, even kill me and I shake my head in confusion.

I am getting crazy, this can’t be happening!

“And what about her?” I ask in despair and he groans in frustration.

SHIT!

“She is probably alive! And her kids!”

“Tell me you are kidding!” I growl one step away from standing up and tearing down everything and he growls to me louder as a warning.

“Am I laughing?” he asks me frustrated and I run my hands through my hair.

She did it again!? AGAIN?

No, I don’t accept this, she must die! She is the reason I suffered and he never loved me, no!

“Send more men and make sure she dies this time! You promised me that…”

“I know what I promised you!” he cuts me off angrily but his tone and words are not enough to make me stop.

My rage and hatred are back! I had been waiting for this moment so many years, she had to die about 12 years ago but she is a tough b***h and this time I was sure we would make it, but I was wrong and unlucky, again!

“Then…” I begin but he stands up, slams his hands on the desk and I jump up surprised yet scared.

I shut my mouth in submission, because I know how dangerous he can become when he gets so angry and lower my head defeated. I need him, I have to be patient, he lost some of his best men and if I continue, he is going to stop everything and then she is going to live and my plan for revenge is going to stop for once and for all!

“Enough Michelle! Our plan changes completely!” he states determined as he sits down again and I lift my head to look at him.

Huh?

I observe his expression for a while and my heart tightens, he means it, but I don’t understand what is going to happen exactly! He can’t stop, he gave me his word, his father and brother gave me their word when I accepted to help them and I joined their side leaving everything and everyone behind me!

“What do you mean? You can’t do this to me!” I whisper worried and he smirks ironically completely unaffected.

“I can and I will!”

“No, because I have done many things for you, for your father and…” I say raising my voice and he hits his right fist on the desk again.

“SHUT UP!” he roars furious and I bite my lower lip nervously.

Damn it! Where is my mind? I was never so stupid, what is happening to me now?

My hatred for Rebecca is transforming me and I am acting like the small teenage girl I used to be!

“You did everything, because you wanted to, nobody pressured you! You wanted revenge and we were going to help you with it!” he continues and I nod awkwardly.

He is right, I can’t deny it and I don’t want to frustrate him more in any case!

“First you betrayed your real mate, you destroyed him and you gave birth to your daughter but came here immediately without her…” he says next and I sigh overwhelmed feeling my desperation drowning me.

Arthur and Hayley…

I haven’t stopped thinking of them, for different reasons, but anyway! What matters is that I am hurt for what happened with both of them, although I had no other choice!

“Of course I did all these! Gabriel Jones never loved me and I know he wasn’t my mate, but I was always in love with him, he was like a God for me, but Rebecca had to be his mate and when I got rid of her, he kept on wanting her and I couldn’t stand it! And then I found Arthur and I realized we were mates and I wanted to leave and go with him, but his father didn’t want me and Arthur was ready to reject me and I couldn’t accept it!” I say in frustration ready to cry after lots of years of feeling the need to and he smiles wickedly.

This is what I was talking to you about!

His dark side is scary, it’s like he has no heart! Some years ago he was in pain when I was suffering but now he is enjoying it!

“Edgar didn’t want you for his son, because you were already someone else’s Luna! He wasn’t an i***t, he knew you very well although he had never met you, your fame was not the best…” he replies coldly and I grit my teeth to find my strong self back with my wolf furious.

Yes, Edgar… The strong Alpha, the ‘good’ father, the ‘fair’ man, the clever one!

He is responsible for everything and I don’t feel bad for what I did, because it was his fault! If he had accepted me as his son’s mate and future Luna of their pack, none of these would have happened! He triggered my hand but in this way I made Damian and his family a big favor!

“This is why your father approached me and almost begged for my help! He wanted to weaken Edgar and his pack, because he wanted revenge for your mother’s death!” I say immediately not able to let him win.

“Yes, but they died while they were fighting him, because you did nothing in the end!”

“I did anything I was asked to do!”

“Don’t pretend you are hurt or we treated you unfairly, because so did we! We tried so many times to kill her and we never made it, we failed this time as well after we found her after years of searching for her!” he speaks back in frustration and I groan annoyed but don’t talk again.

He is not lying! Both of us did what the other side had asked from the beginning, but both of us failed for different reasons I don’t want to think about right this moment!

“What does this mean? Do we stop?” I almost whisper devastated and he smiles in sympathy for the very first time after lots of months.

It means the world to me to take my revenge, I need her to die and hurt Gabriel the way he had been hurting me all those years! He never forgot her, no matter what I did, he was always in love with her.

“No, but the plan is changing as I told you before!” he states and opens a drawer to his left with me stiffening confused.

I don’t understand!

What else we can do?

“I need more than this!” I say annoyed and he smirks as he takes an envelope in his hands and raises it to me.

“See for yourself, I have a small surprise for you!” he murmurs with his eyes locked on mine and the smirk not leaving his face.

I take the envelope in my hands that are suddenly shaking and take a deep breath. My wolf is moving restlessly in my mind and I am getting dizzy. Something feels different, it’s a mixed feeling, I am happy and scared at the same time and I don’t like Damian’s look as I open the envelope. I take some photos in my hands without losing time and when my eyes land on the face of the young girl, a loud sob escapes my lips instinctually and tears blur my vision.

These eyes, this gaze, this skin’s tone, the lips, the hair’s color…

It’s her!

“My Hayley?!” I exclaim crying emotional yet heartbroken with my eyes never leaving from the photo and my wolf howling in pain.

My little baby!

She is just like Arthur, her eyes, these lips!

“She grew up so much! She is gorgeous, look at her…” I whisper breathless and on the edge of passing out.

I can’t believe it, I finally see her even through some photos!

“Oh, you recognized her! How did it come?” Damian asks coldly and I wipe my tears gasping.

“Of course, she is my daughter!” I say through my teeth doing my best not to break into sobs and he takes one of the other photos as there are many and looks at it.

“You remembered about her quite late…” he whispers while staring at her with an interest that terrifies me and I decide not to fight with him.

He is never going to understand how I felt when I left and I didn’t take her with me! There is no day that I don’t think of her! I never wanted to leave her, no matter what happened with Arthur and me, she is my daughter, she is the only thing I thought I had only for myself and I had many dreams for her and me, but Damian’s father approached me while I was still pregnant and hurt from what had happened with Arthur and…

I decided to leave her to Gabriel and run away to come here!

I couldn’t do otherwise, I didn’t want to put Hayley’s life in danger, I didn’t know if Damian’s father was telling me the truth or if he just wanted to kill her because she was Edgar’s granddaughter, she was supposed to be the next Alpha of his pack after Arthur and…

Leaving her killed me!

I couldn’t trust Gabriel as well, I knew he hated me, but he had been trying to stand me and I was worried about Hayley, but I knew his parents and Kaitlyn would take care of her because they’re kind!

All these years I was dying to know how she is doing, but I never tried to find out, because I didn’t want Damian’s father, his older brother or even he to understand a thing!

But now…

How did he find her and why?

I mean, nobody had ever mentioned her! I had asked from everyone to leave her out of it! You see, Damian’s father knew about Hayley, but I had convinced him to forget about putting her in this! It was difficult, but I did it and…

If Damian has her pictures and he knows about her, this means that…

He knows who she is and this is a disaster!

NO!

I knew it, my bad feeling just came true, he didn’t do this accidentally!

“How did you find her and why?” I ask forcing myself not to get more panicked than I already am and he smiles devilishly and not so angry with the photo still in his hands.

He has plans for her and what am I going to do if he wants her in order to blackmail or threaten Edgar?

He hates her, I know he does and he won’t give into anything Damian says, so she will be useless to him and then he could kill her!

Oh my God!

Not her!

“You know it is very easy when I know her full name, don’t you?” he says and rests his back to the back of his black leathered chair.

“I knew something was wrong… If she was Gabriel’s, you would take her here to hurt him more but… No, she is Arthur’s that is nowhere to be found after Edgar banished him for sleeping with you! He was a shame for him!” he continues and I press my lips in desperation.

I was expecting it! It is quite easy to think about it…

It looks like I was too stupid in my panic!

“Why did you find her?” I ask terrified and he raises his eyebrows in a challenging way that breaks my heart.

I think I am dying already!

“I am sure you know why! It is obvious and you are not so stupid, you are just playing…” he mutters and exhales harshly.

“I want Hayley!” he states not giving me time to talk and I almost fall from my chair.

“As what?”

“As my Luna!”

I open my eyes widely the second these three words leave his lips and the photos fall from my hands on the desk. I feel no strength left in me, I am a wreck and my fear has paralyzed me!

My ears are mistaken, there’s no way he said he wants her as his…

Luna!

He is lying, he doesn’t mean it! He wants to use her and he is trying to convince me, I am sure!

“You have lost your mind!” I mutter harshly but he doesn’t react, his expression is calm.

“I think I haven’t. In this way we’re going to weaken the bastard and his pack and then we are going to become strong, we will kill Rebecca and her kids, you will take your revenge like me and everything is going to be perfectly fine!” he says emotionless and I run my hands through my hair with my mind getting on fire.

No, this is just a lie, he doesn’t mean it!

“This is never going to happen, because he hates her, in fact he has no idea about her and…” I begin but stop when he growls and leans forward again.

“He is going to find out! You know he is going to understand it the seconds he sees her and the same goes for the pack as well, especially once she turns 18 and gets her wolf!” he speaks back not convinced at all from what I said before.

I know he is right, I mean…

Edgar, Arthur and Hayley have ancient blood in them! Their pack is one of the first two packs that still exist, they are the strongest and the same goes for their wolves! Their rules are stricter and not like ours, they are generally weird and difficult to understand and as for the three of them that are Alphas (although Hayley is not and she won’t be, because Edgar is never going to accept her) there is a specific ‘sign’ that reveals who they are and in which pack they belong…

Arthur has a tattoo on his right shoulder, a male deer’s head with horns and Hayley is going to get it once she shifts for the first time, it’s their identity in a way and there will be no doubt about who she is then!

Nobody will ever dare to doubt her, not Edgar, not the pack!

“But he banished his own son, he won’t care about Hayley that is his granddaughter, right?” I ask nervously doing my best to change his mind but my bad feeling goes nowhere.

I know he is too determined, he won’t think about it again, but I have to try as much as I can!

“The pack is going to be affected anyway, if they see her on my side as my Luna!” he states confidently.

“But…”

“There is no but, Michelle!” he cuts me off firmly.

“No, because we are talking about my daughter here and my word counts!” I reply in frustration with my wolf encouraging me and screaming not to step back.

I know I was never there for Hayley, but I did it for her and I want her safe! She won’t come here, I won’t allow it!

“And now she became your daughter, right?”

“She was always my daughter!” I almost scream hurt and he slams his left palm on the table with the photo he had been holding falling on the floor.

Damn it!

He got furious again and I can’t say a thing, how can I change his mind?

“In this case, I am doing you a favor! You will finally be with her and nobody is going to separate you again!” he states and I bite my lower lip thoughtfully.

I must think of something to do and prevent this from happening, I have to know his plans, I won’t use Hayley, not more than I already have! I mean, I left her to Gabriel to hurt him and embarrass him even more, it was like a small revenge, because I am trying to kill Rebecca and ‘kill’ him inside for once and for all! I am sure he is suffering, but Hayley is safe with him and his parents!

Think Michelle!

Mmm…

“When and how is she going to come here?” I ask putting amends to behave casually and he shakes his head thoughtfully.

At least he has nothing specific in mind yet, this is a small relief, for a while…

“We’ll see, I don’t want to rush things and make mistakes, but it will be certainly before she turns 18 for easily understandable reasons!” he replies and I nod ‘in agreement’.

I have less than two years to do something and change his mind and plans!

Maybe I should ask for help from Maeve… She’s a witch, she had been always helping me and maybe I could use again some of her potions and spells…

“I don’t know if I agree yet, I need to think about it!” I state seriously and he raises his eyebrows satisfied yet ‘impressed’.

I hate it when he does it!

He is really ironic and arrogant and he is getting worse day by day!

How am I supposed to agree with Hayley coming here and becoming his mate?

She is my daughter, but what if she is not tough like I am?

Well, I had to become one, because they all broke me, but she?

I don’t want her to suffer, if she is fragile, I have to protect her, I am her mother, it’s my duty and she is only mine, the only one I have left!

“Are you scared?” Damian asks me some seconds later and brings me back to reality not in a pleasing way.

I am terrified, not only scared and I am right to feel this way!

“I am going to be honest! I don’t want her to suffer, I want her happy although I abandoned her and I don’t know her at all! You are a 25 years old man and she is still 16. You don’t love her, you have a dark past, you have too much anger in your heart…” I say truthfully unable to hide how I feel and I see the surprise in his eyes.

I guess he wasn’t expecting from me to be so emotional and sensitive! For him and everybody else I am just a b***h that cares only about her own self and I agree, but I had to become like this and this does not count when it comes to Hayley! She comes above anything and anyone! I can find another way to kill Rebecca, but I won’t try to take advantage of Hayley!

“Don’t worry, Michelle…” he says after a while breaking the silence with my wolf perking her ears confused yet curious.

“I am going to take care of your daughter, I promise!” he continues and I gasp dizzy.

What the hell? How can he say something like this when his plans have nothing to do with love?

Okay, he is worse than I am and a great actor! He is looking at me in a gentle way I had never seen before, his eyes have emotion, they are shining and they are suddenly too bright, he is smiling softly…

Yes, he is a fantastic actor, I have to admit it, but I am an old b***h, he can’t fool me!

“But you want her only to take revenge, for the pack!” I say angrily and he takes one new photo of her in which she is passing by a street and her face is pale with her eyes open and quite melancholically.

What if she is not happy?

I mean… I never thought about it and her eyes in most of the photos are not shining, she is always pale and her clothes are always black…

If she is not alright, I will kill Gabriel and everybody else with my own hands!

Hayley is my little miracle…

“Maybe it will be better, if she comes… We are going to take care of her!” my wolf whispers worried, but Damian coughs discreetly and I snap my head again to him and stop looking at the photos.

“I don’t want her only for these reasons!” he says and my heart skips a beat with my breath cut already.

Does he mean it? Can I believe him?

He doesn’t like lying generally, he was always honest, he says that lies are only for the weak and coward people.

“But for what else?” I ask in agony and he smiles with his eyes landing again on the photo.

“Because…” he begins and pauses to take a deep breath with me staring at him frozen.

“I like her, a lot!”

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Hello everyone!

This is the 9th chapter and I know I got late guys, I am sorry about it!

I had some problems and sudden incidents I had to deal with the day I was supposed to update and then, I had to update His Rejected Queen and Alpha's Abused Mate, so I decided to update it after these two and we are here today!

And what chapter was this one?! Michelle is here and...?

So what do you think of chapter? How do you feel about the discussion she had with this Damian? What do you think about her wanting to kill Becky? What about what she said about Gabriel? How do you feel about everything she said about Hayley? How do you feel about what happened between her and her true mate and his father? What do you think of this Damian? What is going to happen next?

I am very curious to know your opinions and thoughts and I need to thank you for everything. I hope you liked this chapter and you love the story. Everything is getting explained gradually !

Plese if you want to help me from now that is still the beginning and you are looking forward for more commend and let me know your opinion and thoughts.

I will see you again in the next chapter (unless you are reading my other books). Until then stay safe, smile and have fun!

Love you all very much,

                            Marie!