Phases of the Moon

Discovering Moon: Remembrance

Joe’s POV:

We had gotten into a habit over the last three days, where I would do all the cooking and cleaning and he would do the wood chopping. At night we would watch a movie together or read and then we would go to bed. Him in the downstairs bedroom, that used to be my grandfathers and me in the only upstairs room there was, my old room. My grandfather gave me this room because it was attached to the only inside bathroom in the cabin. The other bathroom was outside, I say bathroom, but it really only was an outhouse with an open-air shower. The water wasn’t even heated. He had insisted on using both these facilities, leaving me my privacy. I had tried to convince him that he should use my bathroom, but he had refused.

I had stopped protesting about him using the outside shower, when I discovered that I had a perfect view of him in the shower from my bedroom. I wasn’t proud of the way I was lusting after him, but honestly I needed this. I needed him. If only I wasn’t so scared and I also didn’t think he was in any way shape of form attracted to me.

At about 6 O’clock he came waltzing back into the kitchen with his arms piled with wood and a huge smile on his face.

“Smells great, is that bacon I smell?”

“It is, I thought we could have a breakfast for dinner kind of thing tonight”

“Great, bacon is always good”

My stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch when he gave me another smile. I quickly turned away and busied myself with the eggs.

He went into the other room and started the fire, as he walked I away I couldn’t help but stare after him.

When we finally ate, it was in silence, the air thick with an uncomfortable atmosphere, which I was sure I was causing because of my wayward thoughts and lusting body.

I looked up and stared straight into his questioning eyes. I immediately reverted my eyes back to my plate and started pushing the food around.

He made a fist with his hand and then got off his chair. “What’s going on?”

I gave him a quizzical stare or tried to “What do you mean?”

“You’re basically ignoring me, every time I stepped into a room, you look down or away”

He moved closer to me.

He shook his head and then to my embarrassment continued “Look, we can both feel this attraction between us, acting like it doesn’t exist is just stupid and driving us both crazy.”

I kept pushing the food around not able to look at him, but my heart was beating a mile a minute. Did he just say he was attracted to me. I tried to wet my dry lips with my even drier tongue, trying to gather my courage.

I dropped the fork and looked up at him “Fine, yeah I am attracted to you. But I don’t expect that anything will happen here, so you don’t have to worry”

He started to laugh “Seriously Joe, you have no idea what I think about you, do you. I am very attracted to you, you are absolutely stunning and I can’t stop thinking about you.”

I gave him a sceptical laugh “Really, don’t try and bullshit me, please, just because I saved your life. I don’t need your pity” I got up from chair and tried to leave the room.

He grabbed my arm and turned me to him “Are you kidding me, I have had to chop wood just to try and get this lust under control, and just to put things in perspective I have been chopping wood for three days now and taking really cold showers and honestly nothing has worked”

I stared at him with must have been an unbelievable look on my face, and then the insecurities hit me again “Look I have a mirror, I have seen myself and my body ”

He smiled down at me, I felt a rush of panic when I saw him bring his head down to mine. He captured my lips with his and a storm of emotion filled me. I tried to not make a move, but his tongue stroked over my lips and I opened my mouth. He deepened the kiss, running his hands down my shoulders.

I arched against him and immediately flashes of my ex-husband jumped into my brain. By the end of our marriage he had admitted to me that he never wanted me, and how could he ever be attracted to someone that looks like me. His disgusted face flashed across my mind and I pushed myself away from him.

Unknown male’s:

I immediately felt her withdraw from the kiss and it was like an ice bucket being dumped on my head. She pushed away from me and turned around. She started gathering the plates and loading them into the sink.

I was a little dumbstruck. How could she not feel this thing between us. I stood behind her with a shocked face and then heard her clear her throat.

“You know you don’t have to do that, just because I saved your life”

I shook my head behind her “I might not remember everything about my previous life, but I can promise you this, the man standing here now, will never do anything he doesn’t want to do”

I turned around and left the kitchen, I was angry and frustrated but not at her, her ex-husband must have done some number on her, I felt angry for her part towards him and now he had affected us, this thing between us.

I ran to the shed and chopped the rest of the wood, this was literally the only thing I could think of doing.

I saw something move in the distance and I was sure I would find the deer again. But no, I saw a wolf, she was female, and I wasn’t sure how I knew that. I focused my eyes, and I could see the male and the rest of the pack coming through the trees.

I watched as the wolves noticed me, they stared at me and me at them. Both parties transfixed by something familiar. It was as if they tried to communicate with me. After long minutes the wolves decided to leave.

Their scent was somehow familiar but also not, I was really struggling for answers, what am I? Who am I?

A faint, weak voice came through ‘Kai’

That’s all I heard before the voice disappeared again. It must have been a memory of someone calling to me by that name. I instinctively knew the name was mine, it felt familiar and somehow comforting.

I felt excited that I finally remembered something so I ran into the house “Joe, Joe”

She came running around the corner “What’s wrong, what is it”

I kept running towards her with a huge smile on my face “Kai”

I picked her up and swung her in the air “Kai, that’s my name. I’m sure of it!”

She tested my name on her lips "Kai" I wanted to kiss her and make her scream my name, begging for more.

She smiled with me enjoying my enthusiasm. I immediately noticed when the doubts set in again. “You should put me down before you break your back, I must be heavy”

I put her down and felt her body slide down mine, it was incredibly arousing. I held her while she still stood in front of me, I swept her hair from her face “No you’re not, your absolutely gorgeous to me”

She moved out of my arms and said jokingly “That’s only because I am the only women you remember”

She moved back to the kitchen and I felt lost for a second.

“I made us some popcorn for tonight’s movie?”

I followed her “Great”

I searched the cupboards for bowls and cutlery. I found some and placed it on the table. She stared at me with a frown on her face

“We are celebrating with ice-cream. I can finally remember my name”

She gave me a sweet lopsided smile and I saw the dimples appear in her cheeks.

She dished the ice-cream and we sat down to eat. We ate in silence, both of us to scared to break this fragile bond between us.

When we finished I helped her clear the table and wash the dishes, this was all done in silence again.

She inhaled deeply and looked at me. “Ahm, would you mind watching the movie alone tonight, I am exhausted and I don’t think I would be able to sit through it”

“NO problem, you want me to bring you some tea”

She started walking to the stairs, I was getting very annoyed with her running away from me the whole time.

“No, no, I’ll be fine, I don’t need anything”

I nodded my head and watched her basically run up the stairs.

I decided to rather read. So, I went to the bookshelf and took some autobiography of Kublai Khan and started reading that.

I immersed myself in the book trying not to think of my tormentor in her room upstairs.

At about 8o’clock I went to the kitchen and made myself a sandwich. I ate a couple of sandwiches, cleaned up and then went to lie on the couch, popping in a movie.

After about 30minutes of trying to figure out what I’m watching, I decided to go to bed. I lay rolling around in bed and finally I forced myself to sleep, clearing my mind of all these unwanted thoughts.