Hallows: Eulalie

Don't Do That

Camille Thomas: Orfeo ed Euridice, Wq. 30/ Act ii- Dance of the Blessed Spirits

Ashley:

I want to get up and see him but Kelly and Tamara decided that the only way to keep me from going anywhere was to make me sleep between them in Tam's California King-sized bed. This room is hella orange. Kelly tried to play it off but I know something happened to him when we were playing together. There is no f*****g he's never played before. It doesn't make sense. But he wasn't lying before. He really didn't know what I was talking about. Dante probably has an eidetic memory. He played it back the same way I had played it for him. He didn't skip a single key. It was like I was playing with myself as a partner. It was so intimate.

I finally make it to the bottom of the bed and slip out from under the covers. I slowly crawl over to the door and sneak out of the room. I don't celebrate my sneaky ninja skills until I get to my room and start slipping on some sweatpants and a hoodie. It's a little past two in the morning as I make my way to the music building. If he's not in the auditorium, I'll go back to bed.

"What are you doing out here?" I scream and almost jump out of my skin when I see him sitting on the picnic table he always sits at.

"f**k, Dante. Don't do that," I place my hand on my chest, trying to calm myself. He laughs. "I can't sleep."

"Come smoke with me," he taps the table. He has a tray in front of him and a couple of purple blunt wrap packages. I go over to him and sit down on the opposite side of the table. "Are you actually going to smoke with me?"

"Yeah, maybe it'll help me sleep," I shrug. I watch him look over his things for a moment and grin. "Do you know how to roll?"

"Yes," he rolls his eyes. "No,"

"Here," I take the tray from him. "If we get busted. You better take the fall."

"Deal," he smirks. I take my key out of my pocket to split the blunts.

"Are you okay?" I ask him. He looks up at me confused.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, you kind of freaked out in there," I point at the auditorium. "Kels said you're crazy but I already know that," he grinds up what he has in a little jar. His grinder is gold and I wouldn't be surprised if it was real gold. He seems like the type to have something that ridiculous on his person. "I'm sorry if I scared you when I touched you. I know you don't like that,"

"How?"

"What do you mean?"

"How do you know I don't like being touched?"

"Well, you only touch people when you're being rough and I've seen Aubrey reach for you a couple of times and you pull away. Even the day you had Tiffany sitting on your lap. You didn't look into it,"

"You don't like it either," he nods.

"No, I don't. But that's only because I've been hit a lot. Like a lot," I admit, licking the edges of the brown paper. It's cherry.

"I'm sorry to hear that," he says sincerely. "No one should ever put their hands on you like that," I hold out my hand for the lighter. He drops a pink lighter in my hand. I smile and use it to dry the spit off the paper and then I hand it back to him. "I thought you didn't smoke,"

"I killed a bunch of assholes when I was fourteen years old. How do you think I got through that?" I look up at him.

"You don't seem like the kind of person that flinches over s**t like that," he lights the blunt. I start working on the second one just to give me something to do.

"I guess not anymore, but it's just because I've had a lot of practice. You know, kind of like nothing scares you anymore,"

"Hmm," he lifts one eyebrow and smiles. God, I love the way he smiles. It's a little lopsided, but I think it's because he's out of practice. "You know I used to think that too,"

"Oh, no. Don't do that," I snatch the blunt from him.

"What?" he grins showing off his perfect teeth. f*****g rich d**k.

"Don't humanize yourself to me. Let me continue being afraid of Dante the Terrible," I take a hit, letting the smoke burn down my throat and into my lungs. He laughs.

"I'm not going to stop being who I am just because I'm scared," he shrugs and takes the blunt from me.

"Okay, okay. Do it. I mean you're f*****g terrifying," I admit. "Everything about you screams nightmare,"

"Thank you," he reaches out and pats my head. I swat his hand away.

"I know what it feels like," I shrug.

"What, what feels like?"

"To surprise yourself. To come face to face with something you're not prepared for. It's like you know the way of the world and then-"

"Here comes a ninety-pound girl that can side-bust you with the strength of a fully grown man?" he smirks.

"So, you do know," I laugh. "I'm one ten, by the way. Maybe one-six now. I've been skipping meals. I'm really nervous about the showcase,"

"Yeah," he licks his lips and offers me the blunt this time. I take it.

"Yeah, it's a fun feeling, right? It's scary because where the f**k was she even hiding?" I take a hit. "You surprised me too, you know? I mean, I think I kind of figure you out at times and then I realize that I've been reading the notes upside down this whole time. You have an eidetic memory. You're a real-life genius and I can't believe I know you,"

"If I tell you something, you promise not to tell a soul?" he takes the blunt when I hold it out to him.

"Cross my heart and hope to die," I nod. He smiles.

"Remember what I told you about my dad?"

"Dementia," I nod.

"My dad was a piece of s**t. He didn't just hurt my mom. He did stuff to me too," he admits. My mouth falls open and I try to blink away the tears that flood into my eyes. "No, no," he puts his hand out. "Not that,"

"Oh, my god. Dante, you can't just say s**t like that with no context. I will f*****g get angry," I try to swallow the knot forming in my throat.

"I'm sorry," he grins. "You're right. I mean my dad was into some weird s**t. Cults and whatnot," he holds in the smoke as he speaks and then lets it out before taking another hit. He offers it to me and I shake my head, knowing I've had enough. "He would make these serums, I guess you can call them and he'd inject me with them. He'd tie me up on this wooden table in our basement. There were candles everywhere and he and my mom would chant weird primal s**t,"

"Oh, my god," I push my glasses up the bridge of my nose. "Have you been checked out by doctors since then?"

"Yeah. They say everything seems normal. For a long time, I've felt normal. I mean normal for me," he shrugs.

"Right,"

"But lately things are changing," his playful demeanor changes and he looks down at the half-smoked blunt.

"What do you feel?"

"That's the thing. I don't feel anything. I feel numb. Like I can't get warm enough. But when we were playing, my entire body was on fire. The faster we went the hotter it got and I told Kelly to get you out of there because I-" he takes in a shaky breath. "I thought I was going to hurt you,"

"Do you feel that way now?" I whisper.

"No," he looks up at me. His eyes are trembling. "I don't feel s**t like this, Ashley. I don't feel bad about making girls cry. I've been doing it my whole life. Even with David. I don't know why the f**k he's here, but I can't imagine him being gone."

"Dante, I think that's called love," I get up and go sit next to him. He scoots over a little to make room for me, but he doesn't pull away from me. I place my hand over his and feel how cold his hands are. "What your parents did to you was wrong. You didn't deserve that. Maybe it's hard for you to understand what you're feeling because you don't know what it is.

"That coldness comes from pulling away from people who care about you. Like Kels and David. Uh, Tony, Rudy, and Tam. They love you. All of you. Even when you're being a complete f*****g asshole,"

"I don't mean to be."

"I know you don't. Which is why I'm still here. Don't pull away from them. Especially David. I mean that dude apologized to me on your behalf. Kelly makes up the cutest excuses for your actions. People don't do that. Trust me. If they didn't love you, they'd leave you out in the cold to rot on your own,"

"You think this is normal?" he asks, placing his hand on his chest.

"Normal is not a word I would use to describe you. Even without knowing as much about you as I do now. But yeah, it's pretty normal to feel bad about hurting someone you care about. It's probably been going on for longer than you think. You probably feel it more right now because you're going through some changes.

"I mean I ran up and side-busted you. You're stepping into Southside territory. Your music is doing f*****g amazing. You lost one of your sure things. I am way sorry about that, by the way. I didn't mean to f**k things up between you and both your girlfriends,"

"They're not my girlfriends and things were getting pretty stale anyway," he shrugs.

"That's what I mean," I point out.

"No, seriously. Tiffany is calm as hell mostly, but she's a lot worse than Aubrey. I f*****g hate her and her crazy ass brother. And Aubrey never shuts the f**k up about her f*****g hair and her nails. They're just f*****g pretty to look at."

"You're an asshole. I can't believe I thought you were a sweetie like a second ago," I shake my head.

"Oh, come on. Don't do that. What about that blond girl at your old school?"

"It's not the same. I didn't pop her cherry and I was never f*****g mean to her. I heard what you did to her when Kelly took me back to my room. You don't treat the girl kneeling in front of you with your d**k in her mouth like s**t. She'll bite down on it and then what? Even if you kill her, you'll still be missing a big chunk of your d**k,"

"Tiffany has a boyfriend. If anything, you should be mad at her," he rolls his eyes. I laugh.

"Why are you f*****g someone else's girlfriend when you can literally have anyone you want? Chicks and dudes. I mean David is hot as s**t and he's a sweetheart."

"I know he is," he nods. "Aubrey and Tiffany were like a two-in-one deal. I'm a guy. I wasn't going to pass up-on the chance to be with them both. I've got a pretty demanding libido."

"I believe you. Those girls hang on to your every move. I've never seen anything like that,"

"They'll be fine in a couple of weeks," he shrugs. "It wears off,"

"d**k," I laugh. He grins and puts the blunt up to his lips again and lights it.

"We're all going to be there," he says after a while. I look over at him. "Your recital,"

"Oh," I nod. "Thank you. That means a lot to me."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world," he looks down at me and holds out the blunt.

"If I keep smoking, I'll fall asleep right here," I tap the table.

"Then I'll carry you back to your room," he shrugs.

"Nothing weird?" I ask.

"I promise," he grins.

I take it and put it to my lips. I think back to what Kels told me when she first described Dante. The evil king turns out to be a pretty cool guy. I see that. I mean he's more evil king than he is cool guy but I see it. Even when I don't want to. I guess we're all just a little broken inside and, with some understanding, we can heal.

I've been trying to find a way to ask god to forgive me for what I've done. Trying to find a way back into heaven, sort to speak, but is that even where I belong? I never really found my place at home or at church with all the good people. But I feel at home here. Everything came so easily back in the Southside. Whatever I wanted, I took. No one ever said no to me until I moved here and I had to learn how to adapt. Was it really adapting though? What did I really change about myself in my time here? Other than getting smarter, the material here is actually challenging. I've never been more myself than I am now.

"Hmm," I shake my head.

"You good?" he asks.

"Yeah," I hand him the blunt back and pull the sleeves of my sweater over my hands.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks.

"I've never had to hide who I am from you or Kels. If someone told me that my best friends would be a little Asian assassin and a big-ass-rich white boy s***h rocker s***h potential serial killer guy, I would have throat checked them so hard they would have died of asphyxiation,"

"Ha, I've seen Kels do that," he laughs. "I thought we weren't friends and now we're best friends?"

"Apparently, yeah. I mean I don't talk to people like this. Not even my mom."

"You miss her?" he bumps me.

"I miss them both. I'm going to miss them both for the rest of my life. What hurts the most is that they never said goodbye. They just let me walk out of that house like I was nothing. We've got what, four more months until school is out? Where the f**k am I gonna go? What the f**k am I gonna do?"

"Hey," he puts his massive hand on my head. I look up at him. "Don't worry about it. I've got a s**t ton of rooms in my house you can occupy. Kels would love another girl in the house. You work for me, remember? You have options."

"I can't ask you for that," I shake my head.

"You don't have to. I'm offering. You said it. Best friends, remember? No, takebacks. I've never had one before and you're cute as f**k. Win-win,"

"Get your hand off my head, Dante," I roll my eyes.

"You can call me Danny,"

"No," I shake my head. "You're not a Danny. You're Dante. I just finished reading Dante's Inferno and you have to own that name. It's the greatest fanfiction I have ever read in my life. It's poetic and dark and diabolical. Just like you,"

"Thank you," he smirks. "I can call you Ash, right?"

"Yes," I laugh. "You can call me Ash. All my friends do,"

"What about Queen?" he smirks. My face instantly flares up.

"Don't call me that. I don't even know how that started."

"But you let it happen."

"Obviously. I'm a girl. Do you really think I'm going to pass up on an opportunity like that?"

"Oh, stealing my lines, Villanueva?" he laughs. "You are learning way too fast,"

"I shouldn't smoke with you anymore. I say the craziest s**t when you're around,"

"You? I just told you something I never even told Kels," he scoffs. "You're dangerous little kitty cat and we're not even f*****g," he laughs and then mumbles. "Yet,"