Bipolar Attractions

22.

“Looks like someone is awake.” I walk into the room with a bright smile on my lips, seeing Jen sit on the bed with a tray of food by her side, while Alex feeds her.

“Laura,” Jen’s voice comes weakly as she returns my weak smile. 

“This is for you.” I stand beside her placing a bouquet of flowers by the table close to her bed.

“Awnn, I think this is the sweetest thing you have ever done for me.” Jen speaks taking a chuckle from both I and Alex.

“Well don’t get used it, cause you’re getting out of the bed soon. I can be babysitting Steve and Allen and you too.” I say earning a laugh from Jen, once which comes cut short with her holding her abdomen in pain of her actions.

“Hey, take it easy, it’s still sore.” Alex gets up from his seat clearly afraid, as his hands move together with Jen to her abdomen.

“I’m fine. It’s fine, it just hurts that I can’t laugh the way I want to.” Jen says with a pouting face.

“It’s just for a while and like I said you’ll be out of here soon.” I tell her earning a smile from her.

“Thank you. They are beautiful,” Jen says referring to the roses I brought, while I only nod at her. 

“Why don’t you get some rest Alex, rather still, go home, get a shower and a change of clothes. I’ll stay with Jen in the mean time.” My gaze on Alex.

“No, I’m fine this way. I don’t mind…”

“Laura is right Alex, you need to rest. I see it for your eyes that you haven’t had a proper rest. So please go ahead. I’ll be fine.” Jen cuts off her fiancé.

“No Jen, it’s not an issue. This is you I’m talking about, I don’t mind.” Alex resists.

“Well I do. How do you think I’m feeling seeing you tired and unable to rest because of me. I’m fine, also, Laura is here I’m sure if anything comes up she’ll call you, which I’m sure nothing will.” Jen soothes Alex carefully, as her fingers entangles with his, while Alex stays silent. “I’ll be fine babe.” Jen adds, as this time Alex nods his head positively, before placing a kiss on her temple and sending farewell to us. 

“It’s evident in his eyes.” I speak while taking a seat on the chair.

“What is?” Jen asks me perplexed.

“How important you are to him.” I add, as I watch Jen go silent, and her gaze away from me. “I’m sorry Jen.” I begin as Jen turns her gaze back to me abruptly. “If I hadn’t persisted we go grab coffee, I…”

“Don’t you even f*****g dare.” Jen cuts me off and my brows furrows. “Except you want me to go back to being unconscious then you’re going to stop this guilt nonsense you’re doing.” Jen adds. “What happened to the Laura smith I know, who hardly gives a s**t even if it’s her fault. I’m not saying it’s yours, which you know it isn’t, but I know the Laura I know, wouldn’t apologize on silly things.” Jen says, as it is my turn to gaze away from her.

You can never understand Jen, because you don’t know what I faced eight years ago.

“Of course she’s still here. Where the f**k will she be.” I feign back as though nothing happened getting Jen to chuckle lightly. “I just thought I needed to say that to you. Believe me if it was Steve or Allen, I rather die before such a statement exits my mouth.” I add, earning Jen to even chuckle more.

“I think I made a wrong decision letting Alex go, you’re going to open up my wounds again Laura.” Jen says still chuckling lightly.

“Well it’s good to see the color back to you face again.” I tell Jen seriously, as her white skin is still pale, but brighter than it was a couple of days before.

“I have to tell him Laura. I can’t keep hiding it from him anymore.” Jen talks with solemnity while I only listen. “He told me, while I was unconscious all he thought about was loosing me when he hadn’t even began eternity with me, for that he wants as soon as I recover properly we should get married,” Jen says and I sit upright listening to her.

“So what did you say?” I ask her.

“I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say. Hell yes, I want to spend forever with Alex, I love him so much for that, but it keeps eating me up not to tell him about a truth that holds significance in my life. While I was got shot at that bank, the only thing I thought about was him and Venice, and what a bad person I am if I did die this way without letting him know the truth about me, while I do know practically everything about him. And I made a promise that if I were to survive I will tell him, because it isn’t fair to him to keep this away.” Jen adds, while I let out a sigh.

“Then do it. Tell him. You have said it, he loves you and you love him, and love is sacrifice Jen. If he does want you, he will want every part of you. The good and the bad, so don’t let that stop you from experiencing something beautiful with him.” I tell jen as she only nods at me, while I see her eyes begin to tear up. “And if he doesn’t, I think I know a very good club we can go for a rebound.” I add making Jen to immediately come out of her tearing state to let out a chuckle. 

“I hate you Laura,” Jen chuckles making me let out a genuine laugh I haven’t had in a few days. “But I do have one question though Laura,” Jen looks at me with something in her eyes that I can’t quite fathom, along with the cluelessness of what her question will be. “Have you ever been in love?” Jen asks me, as my gaze stays fixed on her loosing every emotion In them, while my lips stays glued and silent of the memories her question hold.