Heaven's Will

3

CHAPTER THREE

Naririnig ko ang pagring ng phone sa kabilang linya.

"Cy?"

"T-tita.." hearing her voice made my own voice crack.

"Dumalaw ka na ba kay Aldrin?"

"Kanina lang po. I miss him tita. So much.." She sighed.

"I do too. It's been a year, ang sakit na nawala siya sa mismong araw pa ng birthday nya."

Instantly, I felt sorry and guilt flooded me. I started to blame myself again, mentally. I knew it was my fault.

"How I wish I could turn back time. Sana po.. Sana po hindi nya ko niligtas. Siguro, kung hindi nya po ginawa yon ay b-baka buha-"

"Please Cy. Wag mong sabihin yan. Dont blame yourself. Wala kang kasalanan. Nobody wanted this to happen."

"P-pero tita..."

"Listen to me, honey.Wala kang kasalanan. Aksidente ang nangyari. Aldrin wont be happy in heaven if he sees you blaming yourself over his death. Maging matatag tayo. Kasi Im sure yun din ang gustong mangyari ng anak ko. Wala na siya. Cy, mahirap man tinanggap ko... And... and I think it's about time for you to accept it too."

"......." I cried silently. I dont know what to say. Pano ko tatanggapin, eh hanggang ngayon hinahanap hanap ko parin siya.

"Look Cy. Im happy hearing from you again pero I have an important meeting to attend to. I hope you dont mind."

"I-i dont. Go ahead Tita."

"Okay, goodbye. Take care andbe strong."

"Yes tita... Thanks."

And just like that, the call ended. Ibinagsak ko ang katawan ko sa kama, my tears wont stop falling. Nag uunahan sila sa magkabilang pisngi ko.

Aldrin? Dapat na bang kalimutan kita?

Nagpahupa muna ako ng emosyon, pagkatapos ay bumaba ako. I think I need milk. 5:30 palang pla.

Nadatnan ko si Kuya at ang girlfriend nyang si Jimmhel. Naglalambuchingan na naman sila.

"Isa Lester!!! Hihihihi! Ano ba!! Stop na babe! Hahaha, nakikiliti akooo!!!"

"Anong tama na. Ayoko nga. Eto sayo, yaaahhh!!!"

"Hihihihihi. Les naman... Hihi!!!"

Napalingon sila sakin. Tumigil si Kuya sa pagkiliti sa gf nya.

"Nandyan ka pala Cy."

I nodded. "Yeah. Dont worry. Kukuha lng ako ng gatas aakyat narin ako. Tuloy nyo lang." I smirked.

"Istorbo." Nakairap na sabi ng magaling kong kapatid.

KYLE KENNETH'S POV

Mom will take me out for dinner. 6 na. She got dressed, pinipilit nya akong magsimba. KAINIS.

She knows how much I hate going inside churches. Pero wala akong magawa. She threatened me.

"Do I really have to come with you inside this place?" Naiiritang tanong ko. Nasa tapat na kami ng simbahan.

"The way you speak, you make it sound like going to church is a sin."

I rolled my eyes. Hinatak nya ako papasok dito. She knelt and started praying. I can even hear her whispering.

"Thank you, God. For giving him back to me, for giving me back my son. Nawala na sakin si Stacey at si Jeff, mababaliw na po siguro ako kung pati siya ay nawala pa. Thank you kasi hindi Nyo sya pinabayaan. You are the reason why he's still alive and breathing right now. Kayo ang dahilan kung bakit upto now ay kasama ko parin ang anak ko. I will take care of him and guide him the best way I know of. Hindi ko sya susukuan kasi Im the only family he has left."

After that ay nagsign of the cross sya at siniko ako. "Anak, thank Him. Pray. You owe your life to Him."

I snorted. MAGPASALAMAT? FOR WHAT? Dapat ko bang ipagpasalamat na kinuha nya sakin ang tatay ko at kapatid ko? Dapat ko bang ipagpasalamat na nawala yung dalawang taong pinakamamahal ko?

Dapat ko bang ipagpasalamat na nangulila ako sa tatay ko dahil kinuha nya agad ito? Wala. Wala akong dapat ipagpasalamat sakanya.

He ruined my life when he took them. Sana hindi nya na lang ako binuhay, pra kasama ko na si Dad at si Stacey.

Bumalik na naman yung sakit. s**t. The bitterness and anger, I can feel it inside my heart.

"He shouldve let me die." I said coldly.

"Ano bang sinasabi mo?! That's ridiculous Kenneth!!! Wag mong sabihin yan!"

"Let's get out of here. I think Im suffocating." With that, tumayo na ko at lumabas.

I felt an arm tugging at mine. It was my Mom. Kita ko sa mata nya ang galit.

"ANO BA KENNETH!!! You listen to me, and you listen good! Hindi porket nawala stin ang Dad mo at si Stacey ay mgiging ganyan ka na. Hindi porket tinotolerate ko yang ugali mo ay pwede mo ng bastusin ang Dyos sa pamamahay nya. MAHIYA KA SA SARILI MO!!!"

Tinitigan ko lng sya. She was seething with rage.

"It's been three years since they died but you still remained the same. You rebelled, you became cold and you shut yourself out from all the people who cared for you.. When they passed away, hindi lng sila ang nawala sakin. Pati ikaw. Nawala yung palangiting Kenneth... Naging matigas ka..."

She was teary eyed.

"Sometimes when I look at you.. I can no longer see the son I raised anymore."

My throat went dry. I looked at her in the eyes.

"Sorry Mom. Pero kung ineexpect mong kalimutan ko sila tulad ng ginawa mo, kung ineexpect mong talikuran ko yung mga alaalang matagal mo ng tinalikuran... Well sorry. I cant. I f*****g cant. Hindi kasing babaw ng pagmamahal mo sa kanila ang pagmamahal ko."

And just like that, I left.

I walked away from her.

Out of this church.

And out of her so-called family.

Pumunta ko sa bar. I was so drunk pero nagawa kong makauwi. 1 na pala.

Sinalubong ako ng maid.

"Sir andito na pala kayo! Kanina pa kayo hinihintay ni Madam. Gigisingin ko lang-"

"Dont. Wala ako sa mood harapin sya."

"Pero Sir, alalang alala po sya sa-"

"BULLSHIT! SABI KO BANG PAKIALAMAN MO KO?! HA?! GET THE f**k OUT OF MY FACE!!!"

Nahihintakutang tumalima ito. Dumeretso ko sa kwarto at agad na nakatulog.

Where was I? How did I get here? The surroundings are covered in thick fog unabling me to see. There was a faint voice. I can barely hear it.

It became more audible. "James!!!" Says the voice. Huh? Ako lang ang nandito!! Walang James!

"James!!!"

"Sino ka?! Hindi James ang pangalan ko!" Hindi na muling sumagot ang boses.

I blinked. Nasa isang park na ko ngayon, nakatingin sa isng couple na nakaupo sa bench. Hindi ko makita ang mukha nila. I squinted but to no avail.

Ngbago na naman ang paligid. Nasa isang kwarto ako. May table doon, lumapit ako at nakakita ng isang papel sa ibabaw nito. Bago ko ito mahwakan ay...

*KRIIIIIIIING. KRIIIIIIIING.*

I woke up, napailing ako. It was a dream. Weird. Medyo masakit ang ulo ko. Hangover. Anong oras na ba? Napatingin ako sa clock at nanlaki ang mata ko.

SHIT. IM LATE FOR CLASS!