Chapter 9

1456 Words
Natasha As we stroll through the crowded mall, I notice Caden constantly keeps looking at me. He hasn't said a word to me yet. I wonder what his problem is, but I make no attempt to ask. I don't like to judge books by their covers, but he's still giving off major douchebag/asshole vibes. Ahead of us, Brandon and Evan walk side by side, talking and smiling. It seems like they really like each other. I find myself smiling at how cute they are together. I can't help but also feel a bit jealous, though. I know I'm still young, but I can't shake the feeling that I'm falling behind. Everyone around me seems to be in love, getting married, starting families, while I'm stuck in survival mode. I wonder when it will be my turn to be happy again. Memories of my last time at this mall begin to surface, but I try to push them away. I'm safe here. Knox won't let anything happen to me. I can't spot him in the crowd, but I know he's out here, watching. Caden clears his throat, breaking the awkward silence between us. "When I saw you at the party, I was quite captivated by your beauty. I felt like you and I would look great together." That's interesting...because I don't remember seeing him at all. I raise an eyebrow at him. "Oh really? How so?" He gestures at himself with an arrogant shrug. "Well, you're hot and I'm-" he flashes a smirk, "me. Our fathers are wealthy. When I become Don, your father and I could practically take over this whole damn country if we wanted to." Get over yourself, asshole. I deadpan. "I have no interest in being any more involved in the mafia than I already am." I crave a simple life. I don't want to be wrapped up in my dad's s**t anymore. Even if he ends up resenting me when one day I find a way to escape this world. Caden's eyes narrow, but he quickly masks it with a smirk. "And as my wife, you won't have to be. Just sit on your pretty ass and let your husband handle all the business. Of course, you need to watch your figure when you're with me. I'm not into fat girls." I fail miserably at hiding my grimace. Is this like some f****d up proposal? Does he really think I'm going to say yes? "Thank you for the offer, Caden," I reply, my voice laced with irritation, "but I'm not interested in marriage right now." He snorts. "You're kidding, right? You think any other man would want you after knowing what happened?" This s**t again. I glare at him, anger surging through me. "You mean that I was kidnapped? That I was drugged and raped for three days?" My voice is shaking with rage. "I'm really starting to get tired of you f*****g assholes blaming me for that!" Brandon glances back at us, and I quickly force a smile. I don't want to ruin his date with Evan over Caden. I just need to get through the rest of the evening without speaking to this asshole again. Caden's smile mirrors mine, but once Brandon turns back around, he leans in close to my ear. "You know, there are men like your father selling their virgin daughters for three times what you're worth. You should be grateful I even offered to marry you," he hisses. His words hit me like a slap in the face. The anger burns hot and fast, but I clamp it down. I won't give him the satisfaction of seeing me crack. In my head, I want to stomp on his f*****g balls, but I won't make a scene here. Fuck this guy, though. We wander through nearly every store in the mall, with Caden buying a bunch of unnecessary s**t he doesn't need and forcing the two men of his who just showed up to carry all his bags. I feel bad for them; no amount of money would convince me to work for someone like him. Eventually, we take a break at the food court and order smoothies. Sitting around a table, Brandon and Evan continue enjoying each other, while I keep my distance from Caden, turning my body to face away from him. "You know, I'm surprised you don't have a bodyguard, Natasha. Considering your mom died here and all," Caden comments casually, taking a sip of his green-pressed smoothie that looks more like baby food than something I'd put in my mouth. Brandon shoots him a murderous glare from across the table. "I'm sorry, what did you just say to my best friend?" I shake my head, silently signaling Brandon to let it go. "It's okay," I mouth. "No, the hell it's not," he retorts, his voice rising. "Daddy Knox would f**k you up if he heard that, and that's if I don't get to you first." His fists are balled up on the table, and I can't help but slap a hand over my face. I hope that Knox didn't somehow overhear his secret nickname. I mean, it's not like I call him that, only Brandon does, but still. Evan's face twists with rage and disgust. "Caden, what the f**k? You promised you wouldn't be an asshole to her!" Caden rolls her eyes, acting as if his brother is being dramatic. "That's when I thought she was easy. Now, I think her ego's a little too high for her body count." My body count? Brandon shoots up from his seat, but I raise a hand to stop him. "Uh, I'm going to go check my makeup really quick, I'll be right back," I say, my voice on the verge of breaking. Brandon starts to follow me, but I tell him to stay. I'll use my safe word if I need to, but I think I just need a minute alone to gather myself, and not let Caden ruin Brandon and Evan's first date. Instead of heading to the bathroom, I find myself walking towards the mall's exit, each step quickening as I try not to fall apart in front of other people. Once outside, I stand in front of the entrance, staring across the parking lot at the place where Mom died. The memories hit me all at once, raw and violent, as if it just happened yesterday. The lifeless bodyguards. The roar of the car exploding. The smell of burning metal and rubber. The screams I made as those disgusting men dragged me to their car, my voice hoarse from shouting for help that never came. I take a deep breath, but it feels like I can't f*****g breathe, my throat raw with emotion. I need to find a way to calm down before Brandon turns this place into a warzone, or Knox finds out where he lives and kills him. I focus on my breathing, counting the seconds as I inhale and exhale. But the memories and Caden's words grip me tightly, weighing heavily on my chest. Tears stream down my cheeks in a relentless cascade, and sobs shake my body like a violet storm. My knees start to buckle, but just as I'm about to collapse, a pair of strong arms wrap around me. "Baby girl, why did you come out here?" he whispers gruffly in my ear. His voice is a mix of concern and frustration as he cradles me close, preventing me from hitting the ground. Knox. I press my face against his chest, unable to speak, the tears soaking into his jacket. I feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing, and it helps to ground me. His touch is a reminder that someone still sees me as worth protecting. I just want someone, just one f*****g person, to view me as someone who can be loved, not just a pawn in their quest for power. Knox's grip tightens as if he's shielding me from the darkness that has resurfaced. I remember the first time he held me like this. I was completely broken then, and just like now, he pulled me into his arms and held me together when I couldn't do it myself. I thought after nine months I would've been able to rebuild parts of my older self, but I was wrong. I realize how far I still need to go. I don't want to live my life this way, always afraid, always falling apart the second my trauma is mentioned. But I don't know how to break free. I don't know how to be okay again. Knox won't always be here to catch me, so why do I keep leaping into his arms?
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