After Your Rejection

Chapter 9 About to Shift

Sebastian

Now that’s a surprise. I thought Axel was like all the unmated Alphas, but obviously, I was wrong. I know nothing about the alleged higher s****l drive among Alphas. I was not born an Alpha. Besides, since I found out Alexis is my fated mate, I haven't had s*x. I'm not a virgin like Axel, but it's been a long time since I was physical with somebody. I used to sleep with female warriors after strenuous training or assignments back in the Howling Wolf Pack. But it was just s*x, no feelings attached.

'I know you think I'm the crazy one for not having s*x with any she-wolf flirting with me, but I always wanted only my mate. Why have something less when I can have the best one for me? And besides, I want my mate to know that I'm only hers and there was nobody else before her. I know how my Mum felt when meeting Dad's exes and feeling insecure because of them. I don't want that for my mate, especially not for Freya.' Axel continues. Kieran had a pretty bad reputation with women and several scandals behind him. Amber was having a hard time accepting him as her mate back then. Fortunately, they overcame their past and are happy together now.

'Axel, I don't know what to tell you now. Now I get it why you don't want to do the dare and I respect your decision. I'm really impressed how you treat my sister, even when she can't feel the mate-bond yet. I cannot imagine a better man for my sister. But at the same time, I'm angry with you. Why didn't you tell me Freya is your mate? We are friends!'

'Trust me, this is not how I imagine you'll find out. I wanted to tell you a million times, but I don't want to spoil it for Freya. Like I said, I want it to be magical for her. If you knew, you would be acting differently around me or Freya. Any one of you would. That's why I only told Alexis and my parents, hoping they wouldn't let it slip near your father. I'm sorry man, I really am. Despite everything, are we good?'

'Of course we are. I'm so happy for my sister. And for you.' Suddenly, Finn hugs Axel. Not pat him on his shoulder or side-hug, but they are actually hugging each other. I'm pretty sure this is something Finn isn't doing every day.

I must admit, I'm very impressed by the dynamics in their group. It seems to me like they can get angry with each other pretty fast, but they cannot stay mad for a long time. They're very close, and they understand each other really well. It's definitely because they grew up together. I'm a little bit jealous of their relationship. I didn't have that kind of friendship during my childhood. Seth and I weren't close. Hell, he was treating me like a plague. And my father was encouraging it. Seth was the golden boy, the future Alpha. I was nobody. The only person loving me was my Mum, but she died when I was 12. Since then, I have been on my own. Every day was a battle of wills between father, Seth and me. And father always chose Seth's side, even when he was wrong. Most of the people in my pack treated me with respect, but there were a few that were used to making fun of me, mocking me or insulting me. I dealt with these people when I became Alpha. I don't like this kind of behavior and I sure as hell will never tolerate it in my pack. We are equal regardless of our rank. Kieran taught me that everybody has their own value. Alpha and Luna, with the help of their Betas, manage the pack, warriors led by Alpha and Gamma protect the pack and Omegas tend to the needs of all pack members. I like his view of the world and especially of the importance of every pack member. Every one of them contributes to the well-being of the whole pack. That's something I'm trying to establish in my pack. It's a nice change after my father's and brother's tyranny and I think people like the new course as well.

-------------------------

It's almost midnight and we are winning. Alexis is really competitive, she's ready to do whatever it takes to win. I don't want to upset her, so I'm doing my best with every dare we get. I have to admit, I was skeptical at first about this game, but surprisingly, it's fun. It really clears my head of constant thoughts of my brother. I was on the edge from the moment I found out of his involvement in the rogue attacks. Also, the fact that Alexis is turning 18 tomorrow is leaving me anxious. I'm not sure how she'll react once she finds out. Hell, I don't even know how her family will react, especially Kieran. To him and to Darius I owe everything. I will never forget what they did for me and how they were willing to help me through the worst trial of my life. I would never want to let him down. And that's what I'm afraid of, his disappointment that his daughter is mated to me. I wasn't born an Alpha, my brother was. Alexis should be with somebody more worthy of her. Moreover, if Seth finds out she is my mate, she'll have the target on her back and that's something I cannot live with. At this point of our lives, it's better for her to stay away from me. Maybe I should leave now before it's too late. Alexis has been fidgeting for a while now. I think her shift is close.

'Guys, I have a feeling I'm about to shift. My skin is crawling, and Goddess I'm sweating. I'm uncomfortable in my own skin.' Alexis says, confirming my suspicion. It's like somebody poured a bucket of ice-cold water on me. It's too soon. I thought I would figure out something before she finds out I'm her fated mate. If things were different, I would be the one guiding her through her shift like a good mate should do. But I can't do that, not when she will be in danger with me. Alexis stands with the help of her brother and he carries her to the front yard. I don't know what to do now. I can't just disappear. But at the same time, I can't stay. The best solution is to leave for my room before she comes back. Then I will leave soon in the morning, which will give me more time to think about our complicated situation. I can't think straight when I'm around her.