The Bar Stool

No ifs ands or buts.

When I hear the sirens I know something is wrong. I'm not sure what, because I feel if I were to open my eyes I'd find out. I don't want to believe that I'm laying on a stretcher in the back of an ambulance.

Don't worry about me. I want to tell them. But I can not speak.

Anxiety builds up inside me. Causing, my breathing to pick up. I'm gasping for air, lifting up off the stretcher.

I can hear them asking me to stay calm, to breath. That I've just been in a minor accident. But all I can think about are the whereabouts of my dad.

When I think we've arrived at the hospital, they buckle me down, straps over my body as the push me through the sliding doors. The light above me bleeds through my thin eyelids.

Open your eyes, you're safe now. One of the many nurses around me says.

It's like my body knows where I am and that I am no longer in a state of shock. My eyes peel open, the fluorescent lights burning my irises, but only for a second.

The noise around me suddenly doesn't sound like it's under toter, it's loud and causes my head to pound. I must have hit my head. I'm not exactly sure as to what happened.

All I remember was my tires squealing then boom...black.

As the nurses poke and prod at me they wheel me into a room, removing the large black straps from my body. They set me up and that's when the pain really hits me. My muscles are tensed and my head is so close to pulsating out of my skull to the point where I want to cry, because it hurts so damn bad.

"Tayzley!" I hear. "Where is she?" A panicked voice asks. Her voice is so high pitched I can't tell who it is. But when she comes around the corner I want to cry just then.

"Carly?" I croke, my throat dry and horse.

"God damn it Tayzley I thought you were dead!" She rushes to my side and hugs me too hard, my body groaning for her to stop. "s**t sorry..." She pulls away. "I saw your car being towed away, the driver side door was all smashed in." Her eyes glossy and red.

"I'm fine," I whisper. The nurses helping me to a new bed.

"Everyone is on there way. I called your dad he's freaking out." Everything all at once, including my worry starts to dissolve a her words.

I lay my head on the pillow they gave me and sigh with relief. "Thank god."

***

Carly's definition of everyone, literally means everyone. Everyone has been asked to wait out in the waiting room so I'm able to get some rest. Everyone but my dad that is. He refused to leave my side even after the doctor insisted he let me get my rest.

Thankfully he's asleep on the pull out couch across the room. My muscles are finally relaxed after the doctor gave me a small dose of some pain meds. I sit myself up with the little strength I have about to make route to the bathroom.

The door to the room cracks open and I automatically freak, because if the nurses see me moving they will have a conniption on to why I didn't use the call button for help. I attempt to fix my gown and move back on the bed, but I almost fall before a strong grip catches my fall.

"Jesus Tayzley, you need to be more careful." As soon as he speaks I know exactly who it is. Both me and my evil subconscious out-of-this-world confused as to why he is even here.

"I don't need your help, I'm fine." I slip my arm from his hand.

"You don't look like you're fine. Let me help you." He offers, but I deny him.

"Can you please be quiet, my dad is sleeping." I point to him on the couch and I'm glad his back is turned to us.

"Sorry," he whispers.

"What are you doing here anyways? Who told you?" I finally push myself back onto the bed, lowering my hospital gown down my legs.

He takes a seat by my bed, his eyes look tired, the blue around his pupils almost a stormy gray. "Carly, told Bobby, Bobby told me. I had to sneak past the front desk to get in here."

I roll my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest. "Why doesn't that surprise me...what do you want Tanner?" I try to keep my voice low enough not to wake my dad.

"Why do I always have to have an explanation Tayzley!" I glare at him when he raises his voice at me, my dad russells in his sleep. "I care for you. Is that not allowed in the brain of yours? Am I not allowed to care for you? For f***s sakes Tayzley you were in a damn car crash."

"You hardly know me...why care so much?"

He's so frustrated with me that he stands, pulling at his blonde hair by the roots. Marching over to me, placing both hand on each side of me pinning me to the bed. "What more do you want me to say Tayzley? Tell me, what I have to say to make you f*****g believe that I'm slowly starting to have feelings for you?" Our noses almost touching.

I can't help but hold my breath, as he does this. Holding me captive between this close, somewhat intimate barrier of his arms. I take a glance at my dad, who is still asleep. And look back at Tanner. "I don't know what I want you to say... Or do. You make me feel things I shouldn't."

"Like what Tayzley?" he pushes.

"I don't know..."

Again, the door to the room opens and this time its a nurse. Tanner backs off clearing his throat. The nurse looks between us two then her eyes land back on Tanner. "Sir you can't be in here, she needs her rest."

"It's fine really he ca-"

"No... I'll go I have to get back home anyways." With that he leaves. Why does he do that?

It's late and I'm exhausted. I don't have time to ponder on his sudden dismissal. As the dark from the outside soon fills the room, it does my eyes as I finally fall asleep.

***

Tuesday I was released from the hospital. It has been four days since I've been to work, four days since I've even seen sunlight. And I haven't seen Tanner since he ran out of my hospital room that night.

Jules gave me till next Tuesday off to recover. I mean not that I needed that much time to recover, because I feel fine. My neck still hurts every once in a while, but the doctor subscribed me some medication for the pain.

My days off have been spent inside, my skin slightly missing the rays of vitamin D from the warm winter sun. I've been thinking about Tanner mostly the other how my dad forgave me for my rude outburst about mom.

Back to Tanner now. Why did he leave so f*****g abruptly even after I said he could stay?

Why he sends me mixed I'll never know. He's a guy that's what they say right? What does that even mean. I'm a guy. Do they think because they are a guy they have some kind of empowerment over us women? Like they have some way to weasel their way out a some situation because they are a guy? Ugh, one second he's tells me he has feelings and the next he acts like he doesn't know me. Whiplash, is what I'm experiencing from him and no its not from the car crash.

Group text to: Carls and Bells.

Me: No ifs ands or f*****g buts. We're going out tonight. Its greatly needed. I send them both.

Bells: Aye aye captain.

Carls: Right there with you love.

Me: love? Oh dear, I don't even want to know. Just be at my house around ten. This bitchacho needs to see some sunlight before I get my drink on.

And its the truth. For the first time in four days I move from the brown recliner in my living room slipping on my workout shoes, that are quite dusty might I add and take a much needed walk around my housing addition.

As the night rolls around I'm ready for some shots and lots of them. Maybe I should be at home getting the rest I need, but life's too short to be sitting around right?

When we arrive to the bar it's packed. Of course it is, it's Saturday, but it's so packed we have to park over at NAPA. Bella decided to drive and be our DD. She's not much of a drinker, but maybe tonight Carly and I will switch that up.

Walking in, all eyes are on us, like always, like we aren't meant to be here, but once you start drinking then your become friends with everyone.

Over on the stage a band is setting up. So that's why it packed?

"Yo, Raven!" I call to my favorite bartender who's spittin out drinks faster than anyone I've ever seen.

"Yeah baby?"

"Who's playing?"

"Cheyenne!" She tells over the music as it begins.

I nod leaning against the small empty space between two guys. "Shots and keep them coming for me and my girls." I slap card on the bar.

"You got it babygirl!"

"Tayzley I'm not drinking," Bella warns me.

I turn to her wrapping both my arms around her neck. "I'm paying, your drinking. I said no ifs ands or buts." I raise my brow at her.

"C'mon Bella." Carly joins in. Giving her the biggest puppy dog brown eyes.

"I hate you both," she groans walking to the bar grabbing her shot and downing it.

Both Carly and I laugh and cheers to a night full of drunk festivities.

***

I can't recollect the hands on my hips and who they belong to. The song playing from the band is pulsating through my body as I grind my ass against this unknown body. My legs are numb, but I don't care. I'm having way too much fun.

Carly and Bella are dancing together which has me shocked because Carly always refuses to dance. But to be completely f*****g honest she looks great moving the way she does. I just wish Ethan would appreciate her more for the beautiful person she is. It's great to see her having fun. Its amazing to see the both of my friends having fun.

"Come with me." The voice to the person I don't know demands. He grabs my hand and leads me through the crowd away from my friends. I stumble a bit, my vision slightly blurry, until I catch the quickest glance of Tanner.

He's sat in the same bar stool where we met the first time. My heart soon begins to pick up. Everything around me starts to spin. I yank my hand from mystery mans grip and bolt for the toilet. But when I reach it the feeling of throwing up disappears.

I turn and look at my self in the mirror. My hair is wild and my under eye makeup is f****d. I look like trash... He saw me and I look like trash.

The door opens thinking it's one of the many girls here, my head turns meeting his blazing blue eyes.

It's Tanner.