Afraid to Love

6

“Will you lighten up?” Nick called out and I walked through his ugly little home. Okay, it wasn’t ugly, but it certainly wasn’t a home. It was a bachelor pad. He had a child’s basketball hoop in the den, where the TV was and near the front windows.

“Are you sure you don’t have kids? Because this looks like a ten-year old’s room, just bigger.” I told him and looked around like I was waiting for a kid to run around the corner and call him daddy.

“Well, you know me, always one for sports, and fun.” He told me, and I just huffed a laugh before looking around for the kitchen.

“Wonder what kind of food you have here… protein bars and kale?” I asked knowing he was always into the healthy stuff.

“There are some of those, there are also stuff for baking, baking things like cookies, like the famous double chocolate ones you used to make for the class bake sale.” He threw out there and I stopped and turned to him.

“That’s what you missed? My cookies? That’s all I am here for?” I asked him with a hard edge and his eyes went wide before he took two steps forward.

“Of course not. I missed you. I missed how well we fit together. How we were so good together.” He said, and I looked down at my toes and he came closer. “Yes, I missed your cooking and baking. Yes, I missed your shortness, and your lack of appreciation for my bad sense of humor.” He gave a small laugh. “And my car isn’t called Sofia, it’s Sally.” He said, and I sighed and crossed my arms slightly and looked to the left. “Can you look at me?”

“What now?” I asked looking up at him and he cupped my cheek and I couldn’t help but turn my face into his hand.

“Now… I will go get Ryder, you might want to sit down.” He said, and I let him pull away from me before I went to the couch. He disappeared for no longer than 3 minutes before I heard nails on the tile floor and I looked over to see the black and white dog running at me, but he skidded to a stop and started to growl.

“Ryder… I told your daddy that you wouldn’t remember me.” I said holding out one hand just slightly towards him and he stopped making noise and took two steps towards me and started to sniff the general air. He did that again and again until his tail started to wag and hit the table over and over as hard as he could, and he jumped, putting his front legs in my lap as he mouths came forward and licked me all over.

“Told you he would remember.” I heard Nick behind me and I pushed at Ryder’s chest and turned my head to look at him before feeling Ryder jump all the way into my lap and keep attacking me with wet slobbery kisses.

“This was better when I could hold him in one hand.” I squeaked when he licked the inside of my ear. He backed off my lap and to the cushion and I stood up and looked down at him. “No!” I commanded when he was going to jump up at me again.

“Yeah, he definitely remembers you now.” He said, and I shot him a look before looking down to Ryder and leaning over to rub over his head and giving his snout a scruff which got his tail wagging hard and fast again.

“So, now what? You take me home?” I asked crossing my arms.

“No… actually, I wanted to show you my place.” He said and gestured around the big house and I nodded slightly before moving towards the kitchen.

Looking at it now, with some marble countertops, big stone center, stainless steel appliance and their perfectly cut out spots. His cabinets were see through with dark wood edges.

The stove was so big… it was one that I used to think about cooking Thanksgiving turkey with other things cooking in there with it. Mac n cheese, and what ever else most people put on the table.

“There is more to this house than the kitchen.” He said, and I turned to look at him and he gave me his comforting smile and held out his hand for me. I bit my lip as I looked at the kitchen as I made my way to him.

Once I was near him he leaned down just a bit just to take my hand in his and he gave me a tour of the house, and it was breathtaking. I looked around his home, and I knew somewhere deep down I wanted it for my own.

The entire place was amazing, set with four guest rooms, five full baths. A walk-in closet. And he said that I didn’t even see the best part yet. He dragged me outside, into the big frozen blasting air. He pulled me out and I tugged my jackets tight around me until he dragged me towards another building near his house.

“What’s in there?” I asked as he pushed open the door and waved me in.

“Take a step in and you’ll see.” He told me, now moving around me so he could wrap me into his arms and push me forward. “Like them?”

“If I had a swim suit.” I whispered to myself looking at the hot tub and, what looked like a heated pool,

“You’re welcome to come back after I have my practice, or, you know… you can watch me practice, and then we can head to your place, grab your suit, come back… I can cook.”

“No thanks.” I laughed at the last part, feeling free of the awkwardness that had been floating between us. It just eased away like it was never an issue.

“I can cook now.” He told me, and I just huffed out another laugh before looking back outside. “I can. Name anything and I will cook it tonight.”

“Shrimp Fried Rice.” I said, and his glare was palpable, and I smirked. “Can’t? Okay, how about risotto?”

“Okay how about something normal.” He said, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

“What do you have?” I asked, and he shrugged and waved me towards the house. “How do you not know?” I mumbled and walked back into the cold air until I was at the back of the house. I pushed open the door and shook off the cold and loved the feeling of the heater.

“I don’t really stock things myself… I have a maid s***h personal shopper.” He told me, and I just thought about how nice that must be before going towards all his cabinets. “Food is in the big one.” He pointed at it and I moved there and opened it up.

“Lots of easy stuff.” I whispered to myself and pushed some boxes of Rice-Roni out of the way before going deeper in and seeing cans of veggies and felt slightly disgusted at the spam cans.

“What’s with the face?” He asked me, and I grabbed a can before looking towards him and showing him. “I never got why you hate it. Spam is delicious.” He said, and I rolled my eyes before putting it back in the back of the cabinet.

“It’s gross.” I said and looked towards the fridge and opened that up before seeing orange juice. “I’m taking some.” I told him taking it and moved to get a glass.

“What’s mine is yours.” He told me, and I paused in opening the bottle before just making it half full.

“Not true, but okay.” I said and gave a fake laugh before looking around. “What time is your practice?” I asked looking towards the couches and the TV.

“In about an hour. Are you coming?” He asked, and my eyes shot to him before looking at the juice in my hand.

“Sure.” I said, and he smiled even wider.

“My good luck charms.” He announced, and I rolled my eyes.

“I always hated you calling me that.” I told him, and he smiled slightly and walked closer to the island on the opposite side from me.

“You liked it. You also liked to watch me pin a guy to the wall like it was nothing.” He told me, and I tried my hardest to keep my smile from my face, but it broke out when he moved his head until he made us make eye contact and I just nodded at the memories.

“It was hot. You were a good player.” I told him, and he crossed his arms before giving me a look like I was going to eat my words.

“I am a great, professional, hockey player. And just for the ‘were’ thing, I am going to get you season tickets to all my games. Not that I expect you to go to all of them.” He said, and I smiled at him and shook my head before his stomach made a loud growl noise.

“Let’s get you to practice, and on the way, there you can get us some actual food.” I said trying to think about what is around here, so we could stop sooner rather than later.

“Taco-”

“No.” I said quickly, and he nodded before laughing. “Somewhere with good milkshakes.” I told him, and he just nodded to me before looking towards the front of the house.

“I know just the place.” He said and jerked his head towards the door and I nodded before downing the rest of my juice and moving to wash it but before I could even rub the glass with the soap he grabbed it from my hands and put it down before lifting me. “Let’s go. You don’t have to do dishes.” He said and kept walking with me, with just one strong brawny arm around my middle like I weighed nothing.

“Okay show off, put me down.” I said tapped his hand when we got to the front door.

“Just go get in the truck.” He said once I was ready to go with him. I smiled and walked out of his house, and into his truck. I couldn’t wait to see his practice.