Quintuplet Alphas's rejected mate

Memory lane

I splashed ice-cold water on my face letting it wash over my fatigues , holding and rubbing my sore aching neck .

' It wouldn't have hurt like this if you had punched him right back ' My demon snickered cruelly.

' Says someone that ran away while that happened ' I retort .

If someone saw me speaking with myself like this , they would call for help for sure with no doubt .

Sigh .

I dragged myself from the bathroom , and fell headfirst into the bed letting the coolness of the sheets graze my burning cheeks .

I curled myself into a ball , looking outside the window , at least I escaped the rain , but then again , It would have been a lot nicer if I walked in that rain .

I love walking in the rain , playing , screaming , laughing and crying loudly like a child , I feel like I lost those things as a child , even though no one is the reason for me not having that then .

Up to the age of 15, I don't ever remember being coped inside my room , I always played on the ground , sure I'm not a great player in anything , but I played to my heart's content every day, even though my problem made my then friends bully me non-stop, that didn't stop me I was coping nicely back then than now , always being inside my head , inside my imagination , I had countless of boyfriends inside my head , I was the hero , beauty and everything , everything I'm not in my real life , imagining them helped escape and survive from those bullying .

But for some reason, after we changed house when I was 16 , everything changed .

Even though My friends were cruel and always had this invisible podium where they were on the 1st and I was in the least spot that is considered for ' uglies ', I still had some to call as friends , but after we changed to the new home , I couldn't find any way of happiness other than my phone and few books now .

I barely went outside and always sat in a place , my gluttony increased due to lack of playing , leaving me in this enlarged body , even my imaginary world is shut closed , pushing me out by my neck , throwing me out cruelly to face the reality , No matter how much I tried , I couldn't go back to my imaginary paradise where the only place I felt happy .

Sigh .

As I was drowning in my thoughts , I heard my mother calling from downstairs .

Sigh , I removed my bun letting it fall over my back to hide the bruise on the neck and ran downstairs .

My face instantly split into a huge smile once I came into view of my family .

That's how it is , I don't even have to try , and the smile will instantly place my lips when I see someone notice me .

That's one of the reasons my parents don't have even a bit of a clue what I'm going through .

For them , I'm just a normal girl that attends college , they don't think my problem is a thing .

My well-placed smile, is always there when I'm with them , I like to say it's a genuine smile cause of my love for my family , but it's just my demon doesn't want me to enclose my inner turmoil to anyone .

If you keep smiling , people won't worry about you , which makes them think you are in a safe place but only you know how easy of a prey you are to others .

'' How was the class today? '' My Dad grumbles.

'' Oh, it was nice , I got a good mark on a test! '' I chimed in proudly like a 10-year-old girl who got 1st place in a running race .

My father looked blankly at me . I know he hates when I act like a child , he wants me to be one of those 'mature girls' who knows everything.

But due to my always being depressed and, I liked to show my childhood self to my family, it was another way to make them not suspect me .

Unlike of father's blank expression , my mom smiled sweetly at me , she is one of a kind .

A humble housewife who tries her level best to always stay on the good side of her husband while the fire for independence flows through her blood .

Always giving me this pep talk about how women should empower and rule the world .

My brother walked in just then , ruffling my hair and sat next to me.

I always stayed at least 10 feet away from people usually but my brother is one of the only support systems of my life so I always tried to push myself to him .

He is the only boy I have seen in my life who never hurt me , he can't even hurt an ant , and he is the most kind-hearted person .

Everyone who meets us will never believe me when I say we are siblings because, unlike me , he is well-mannered and silent and humble and modest .

While I, even with all my problems always longed and worked hard for attention and respect he got everything without even trying .

He is always 1st in his classes and everyone only needs one look at him to like him while the same is needed for them to hate me .

He is tall , handsome , and not to mention , no matter how much he eats, he just won't gain even a bit of weight .

Girls always fawned upon him instantly, while not only boys even girls won't be friends with me .

I should have hated him for being everything I should have been , but I couldn't do that , even with my demon spewing cruel things to raise my jealousy , I never let it get to me .

I smiled sweetly at my brother who smiled back, not having even a hint of how cruel of a demon torturing me inside my head .

Once the dishes are served and that's all I need to start gulf down the food even though I'm not hungry , even a bit , I wolve down my entire plate in one go , not caring what everyone is talking about , my entire focus is on eating my food and finishing all the food .

I almost finished my plate and asked for seconds when I heard my mom calling my name .

I blinked as everyone looked at me waiting for my response .

'' Sorry, what were you talking about? '' I asked .

'' You are no longer going by bike , your brother will drop you to college from now on '' Dad replied gruffly .

And I froze , he knows what happened today.

'' Uh?...why? '' I blinked confused .

'' I heard our neighbour has sold his house and the new owner is probably changing his house into a bachelor pod it seems , I heard there are so many boys there , so We thought it would be good if you could be away from them '' Mom said nonchalantly and I rolled my eyes.

The only time I'm ever being happy is riding my bike , even if that is going to leave me now.

'' Nooo '' I whined.

''We don't know yet what kind of people the new neighbours are , it's not safe for you to be near strange boys '' Dad said .

'' Dad what the hell! So what if there are new neighbours? , won't they have their own life to look after or something , why should I have to suffer because of some strange people? what if it was all just some gossip? '' I shouted , with utmost anger .

I always show my anger only to my family , for some reason my shyness and embarrassment will always surpass my anger when I'm outside , so only at times like this , my emotions will burst out .

'' Don't raise your voice at me! '' He shouted back , glaring at me .

I looked around at my mom and brother for help, but I knew they wouldn't. ''What about when Alan leaves? , he will leave in a week '' I asked softly .

'' We'll see about that later, '' He finalized .

I sighed in defeat , returning to finish my food in silence and retreated to my bed .

Just who the f**k those boys are and why the f**k should I even care about them?! .

It's not like I'm any good to look at , even if they see me , they just going to get disappointed for not getting a good-looking neighbour .

A heavy breath left my lips .

I put on my earphones and gazed outside the window at the house opposite ours which Mom mentioned to be seemingly a new bachelor pot but I didn't see any movement in there , there weren't any lights on or any trace of people there .

I kept looking at the house so deeply that I blanked as my mind took on an involuntary ride to memory lane , riding at full speed almost at the pace of getting crashed , the ride showed me all the way I grew up getting bullied , acted as happy getting hurt but never having permission to hurt others , the ride just keeps getting worse and worse , I watched with the crushed heart as how many people have crushed my tiny heart over and over again just because they can.

I was so engulfed by the hurtful words etched inside my heart , replying again and again .

''You are so poor Alvi , even with my help you couldn't do anything , I was there with you '' A voice said with mock sympathy and I turned in confusion to see my ugly demon sitting right next to me .

She doesn't have a face or any complete form , she looks like a half-formed human girl , only her face and body are cruelly disfigured , and the snake-like tongue is wiped out to lick her lips which are formed in a cruel smirk .

In a minute the controller of the ride which was once in my hands transported to hers.

With a cruel smile , the demon started turning the ride to the far forbidden corner of my mind , the place where all of my misery started , the place I wanted to forget for good but never could .

I fought for control so hard , fighting bloody with the demon , begging it to stop but it didn't , I pulled it from her so harshly only to crash .

I jolted up from my bed , sweat lacing every corner of my body making my shirt wet and sticky , it's not morning yet , so I peeled away the sheets and went to sleep once again .

But sleep didn't come again easily , it took me a hell lot of time to shake the terror from my nightmare .

My heartbeat sounded upbeat , racing at high speed like a sports car race , My mind threatened to open up and rewind what was at the corner of my mind but I stopped myself by distracting myself with all the good things that happened to me , the good people I have seen, the good words I heard.

After reminding myself of all my good memories my heart and mind finally calmed down and I slept again with a victory of winning my internal battle.