The Queen Within

Chapter 2

Alandra

On the way back to the packhouse, Jonathan couldn’t stop gushing about the baby. Now that it was confirmed, it was like someone let the reigns loose on a beast. He was talking about the nursery, wondering how long we would have to wait to find out the gender, what to do about a nanny situation.

I put a hard stop on that one. I didn’t know how I felt about a nanny. We could raise the baby on our own. Thinking that though was not practical. Jonathan is an Alpha. I’m a Queen and a Luna. There will be times when we will be far too busy to care for her properly. There had to be another way. Maybe his parents could… But if we are busy, then his parents would be watching over the pack, will that be ok?

I let out a sigh as Jonathan parked the car. It will be fine right? As long as we are together, none of it mattered. We can figure it out as we go.

“We should go straight to my parents before word gets out,” Jonathan told me as he helped me out of the car. A huge part of me wanted to hide away and wait a little longer but I know that I couldn’t. Plus, seeing his parent's happy face would uplift me. Not to mention I had a TON of questions to ask his mother.

Like for starters, would the baby be born a person or a tiny pup? Are there special things I’ll have to do that are different from human pregnancies? Or even just regular shifter pregnancies? Dr.Zale kind of brushed over it all but it wasn’t her fault. I kept saying I didn’t have any questions. I just didn’t want to seem like I was an incompetent mother right off the back.

My stomach growled and Jonathan chuckled. “Let’s get you something to eat first.”

We walked slowly to the kitchen area as members greeted us. I could hear the faint chatter of people gossiping about. It was always about the same thing. Who is sleeping with who, the rankings, new mated pairs, etc. Gossip spreads like wildfire in a packhouse. When we entered the kitchen my mouth started salivating from the smell. The cooks were preparing for lunchtime and it looked like Philly cheesesteaks were on the menu. My favorite. There were even fries!

The kitchen itself is built like a massive commercial kitchen. There was beige tile flooring, and marble countertops. Every appliance was stainless steel and top of the art. Mostly Omegas ran the kitchen but Jonathan makes sure they are paid very well. Anyone can choose to work in the kitchen though if they wanted. There was never a rule set that said you had to work here if you were an Omega. The pay was just really good since the kitchen staff makes three meals a day plus snacks.

Jonathan led me to one of the tables and pulled my seat out. I smiled at him and took it as he sat next to me. An Omega that I remembered by the name of Racheal came up and greeted us. “Alpha, Queen Luna, what can I do for you?” She asked as she placed water cups in front of us. “Hello, Racheal. Whatever is on the lunch menu is fine.” Jonathan told her kindly.

”With extra extra fries!” I blurted out. I blushed slightly as Racheal was visibly holding back a laugh.

“Yes, Queen Luna. And… Thank you for the other day. I was able to pass my test because of your help.”

“That’s great! I’ll have to treat you to something sweet soon.”

Racheal beamed and went over to the cooks. She was such a nice girl and was struggling with math. One night I came into the kitchen trying to sneak some snacks when I saw her sitting at one of the tables near tears over some math assignment she didn't understand. I stood up with her and helped her through it. It was a long night, but it was well worth it.

Jonathan raised an eyebrow at me as a smile spread across his face. I waved it away blushing and he held my hand in his. The sparks that erupted made my core ache. The moment I felt it I had to press it down. The last thing I wanted was for a room full of people to know just how much I wanted Jonathan.

“We finally found you! I swear you’re keeping our daughter from us son!” A booming voice said. I smiled and turned around seeing Jonathan’s parents walk into the kitchen. They have insisted I call them mom and dad, but I just wasn’t ready. But I let them call me their daughter since it’s technically true.

Jonathan and I stood up and we all exchanged hugs and greetings. Jonathan's dad was wearing faded jeans and a white shirt, while his mom was wearing a white short sundress that had flowered embroidered on it. They both looked fabulous and like they were going out somewhere. My heart suddenly started to sound like a jackhammer.

“Mom, Dad, are you guys going somewhere? There’s something we want to talk to you about.” Jonathan motioned for them to sit with us. They both sat down with a worried look on their face.

“Is there something going on? Is it that rogue problem? We were going to go for a little picnic but we can cancel.”

“Oh no! It’s nothing so serious!” I tried to push out a laugh. “Please, go on your picnic, we can talk about it later. Wouldn’t want to ruin such a perfect date and you both look so beautiful!” I was trying to buy myself some more time. Here’s to hoping it works.

“Actually,” Jonathan said eyeing me. Well, it was worth a shot. “It’s not bad news we want to share. In fact, it’s the best news ever.”

His parents c****d an eyebrow at us but don’t say anything else. They clearly were confused and I don’t blame them. It was now or never, and I was sure Jonathan won't let me choose never. I was hoping to wait till later tonight, but here we go.

"Alandra is pregnant."

Silence. Everything and everyone in the kitchen went silent. You could hear a pin drop. I really wish he would've waited till tonight or at least let us do it when we were alone with them. What did it matter anyway? Who am I kidding, someone would've overheard. People were looking at me and I realized I didn't have the best face on, so I plastered on a smile and showed eagerness. I didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea.

Suddenly, it was like someone turned on a switch and everyone was talking at once.

"Oh, my goddess when are you due?!" "What is it?!" "How far along are you?!" "We need a celebration!"

"Everyone please, let's all calm down. We don't want to overwhelm your Queen Luna." Jonathan's mother's voice drowned out all the others. I smiled at her thankfully. She had so much grace and beauty. She was kind and strong, people listened when she spoke. "Queen Luna," She continued, "Obviously this is such huge news, what do you say to a celebration tomorrow so we can make an official announcement and be able to give the full details. Is that ok?"

Is that ok? Of course, it was ok! She was saving me right now from the hundreds of eyes and eager questions. I would be entirely in this woman's debt for this.

"Yes, that sounds perfect. I'll let you head the planning since I was told to take it easy." I'll have to apologize to her after for making her take control of the celebration, but there was no way I could plan a whole party. The last party I planned, if it hadn't been for her would've been a complete disaster. I had too little food prepared, the decorations were wrong, there wasn't enough seating. It was bad. I was so lucky that his mom stepped in and took over saving the party.

His mother beamed, full of excitement. "I wouldn't have it any other way! Why don't I take you upstairs and we let the men have their moment." I was slightly hesitant at first, but when I looked over, it seemed Jonathan and his dad were having a moment. I smiled as my heart warmed at the sight. There was no way I could get in the middle of that. I nodded to her and she had told Racheal to bring my food up to my room.

We chatted about small things as we made our way up. It was hard for me to stay focused in the conversation, and I’m sure she noticed. Being the graceful beauty that she is, she effortlessly filled in the conversation without much being needed from me. When we made it to the room, she had me sit down on one of the chairs by the window as she went to the mini-fridge we kept in the room. She took out a bottle of water and brought it to me.

“Alandra dear, what’s on your mind?” She asked as she took the seat opposite of me. I blinked a few times lost in my thoughts.

“What?”

“You seem… A bit lost dear. Is everything ok? If you don’t mind me asking.”

I sighed heavily. It was painfully obvious I wasn’t as ecstatic as everyone else was. I wasn’t making any attempt to hide it. “I just… I just don’t know if I am ready. I don’t know how to be a mom or what a mom is supposed to be like. I don’t even know what the baby will look like when it’s born! Am I going to give birth to a puppy or a person?!”

I ranted on and on for what seemed like forever. My eyes filled with tears, but my heart became lighter. It was so easy to talk to her. She sat quietly and listened to me the entire time. Nodding her head, encouraging me to go on. When the food came she encouraged me to eat while I still spilled my heart out to her. The fries were perfect and that also helped ease my heart.

When I was finished, Jonathan's mom looked out the window, her expression looking a million miles away.

"I was afraid too. I didn't know if I could be a great of a mother as mine. I was selfish and wanted his father's attention all to myself and I felt that a baby would get in the way of that. I was also young and a new Luna. So much was on my shoulders and I only just met my mate a few months prior."

She looked at me with so much joy in her eyes, it was like she saw the sun for the first time. "But when that loud bundle of joy was placed in my arms, everything melted away. All those worries, all those fears, all those insecurities. The moment Jonathan was placed in my arms, he became my sunshine, my reason for living. His bouncing curls, his squishy cheeks, chunky hands, all of it, became my reasons for living."

I smiled at that. The amount of joy that was on her face, the amount of happiness that radiated from her, I wanted that. It felt complete with it just being Jonathan and me, but the way she spoke about it, made it clear that maybe it wasn't so complete.

She took my hands in hers and looked deep into my eyes, "I know that the word mother, and motherhood, is difficult for you to grasp and come to terms with because of your past. But, as your mother-in-law, I vow to you Alandra, to help you and be the mother that you need through this. I won't let you feel alone. Not for a second."

The tears turned into a waterfall and I was sobbing. This woman, this graceful, living embodiment of womanhood, was filling the hole that my mothers left behind. I hadn't even realized it till this moment. I may have not mourned Mary, or my mother fully, but this woman in front of me was willing to deal with all of that, and pick up the mantle for them.

"Also, I can promise it won't be a puppy."