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“I figured you would have wanted to wear the red ones,” I said. He knew what I was talking about.
“No, Blake was wearing the red ones. I must get new ones now. He may not have minded that they were in someone else’s eyes, but I sure do.”
He smiled at me, looking closely; the smile also felt familiar. I was beginning to realize that maybe if I tried hard enough, the little things would give me his name. Something about figuring him out felt off to me. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to. I wasn’t sure what I would do about it. Would I try to give him a chance after everything he has done? Or would I try to kill him on sight?
“Why do you keep staring at me? Are you planning my murder?” He smirked at me and then started laughing.
I smiled, “No, unfortunately, I think I’m getting a soft spot for you,” I replied honestly.
“That’s great, though.”
“Maybe for you, but I’m afraid no one else will understand.”
“Don’t let that bother you. What others think doesn’t matter, only what you think.”
I turned away from him but noticed he was still smiling at me. I was worried I might have made things worse for myself, but I wasn’t sure what else to do. Honesty was all that I knew, and I didn’t want to be like everyone else and hide things- even if it was probably the best thing to hide things. I lay down and tried to sleep. I felt weak after my time with Dagon. I was battered and bruised, and everything hurt.
I woke up a few hours later. Fresh bandages covered my cuts, and I was feeling a bit dizzy. I noticed that my stalker was still sitting next to me on the couch, watching me. I tried to sit up, but he pushed me back down.
“Easy, Baby. I gave you something to help with your pain, but it does cause dizziness and muscle spasms on occasion.”
I wasn’t in any pain. I did as he asked and laid back down. I wondered what kind of drug he gave me, but then I remembered he made his own drugs.
“Where are Danny and Blake?”
“They’re sleeping; it’s only four in the morning, and they were tired.”
“Are you not tired?”
“I am, but I would rather watch over you than sleep. I don’t trust sleeping here without you, and I don’t want to leave yet. I’m finally able to be close to you. I’m not ready for that to end.”
“Why don’t you trust sleeping here without me?”
“I have a feeling people would try to unmask me.”
“I wouldn’t; knowing who you are now would be weird. I have had the chance to see who you were twice now, but I couldn’t bring myself to look.”
“You don’t want to know who I am?”
“I do; I don’t know why it was hard for me.”
I was no longer feeling dizzy and sat up. My stalker handed me a glass of water, telling me that I may also get dry mouth from the drugs he gave me. I drank the entire glass and put it down on the end table. I still felt no pain, which I was enjoying. I looked at the phone, thinking of calling my father again, but decided against it.
“Thank you for saving me- not just from Dagon but also from the car accident and Robbie.”
He smiled at me, “I will always be there for you, Baby. No matter what, I will always have your back.”
His comment made me smile. I knew I was growing closer to him, and it was worrying. Just like when I fell in love with Dean, I knew it was wrong and bad and that I shouldn’t have done it. In my mind, I wanted to, but the opinions of the people around me always put a stop to my feelings.
“By the way,” he said, touching my shoulder. “We have a problem.”
“What?” I replied. Worry was written on my face, and he could tell.
“Dagon wasn’t at the building when we went there. Also, that huge f*****g man that I unloaded half a clip in and then caught on fire wasn’t there when the cops showed up. No way he should have survived, but he is out there somewhere.”
“His name is Brownie,” I explained, running my hands through my hair. I felt ugly, and he could see it.
“Well, he will most likely be coming after me soon. And don’t worry my love, you’re still beautiful, no matter what they did to you.”
“If they are going to be coming for you, then you should get out of town. It isn’t safe here for you.”
“I thought you wanted me dead; you told me enough times.”
I lowered my head and stared at the floor. What was I doing? I should want him dead; I shouldn’t be getting closer to him. I took a long breath, “That was then; things have changed.”
“I won’t go,” he said, looking sad.
“Why not? If they get ahold of you here, you could be in trouble.”
“I don’t want to leave you.”
“This is different. It’s not like you are leaving because I’m forcing you out. You’re leaving because you could be in danger.”
“I don’t want to go. I feel like you are just trying to push me out the door. Why do you want me to leave so badly, damn it? We were making progress, and now you’re back to not wanting to be around me. You actually cuddled with me as I slept beside you at Dagon’s.”
“I have no motives other than getting you to leave for your safety.”
“The only way I will leave is if you come with me. You and I know that won’t happen, so just drop it.”
I thought about it; he would only leave if I went with him, but he was right; I wouldn’t do that. It didn’t matter how close we got. We were not to that extent. I was sure he would keep me safe, but I wasn’t sure if I could manage it. I still held fear towards him, not towards me but towards others. He was unpredictable and impulsive, which I couldn’t forget or forgive.
“Fine,” I said, standing from the couch.
“Where are you going?” he asked sadly. “You’re not mad, are you?”
“No, I’m not mad, but I should call my father. I want to see how everyone is after everything that happened to them.”
“Why should you care? They didn’t mind letting you stay with Dagon. I watched them, Ivy. They went right back to their normal routine, selling drugs and weapons. Your father still has Ozzy working for him as well.”
“I want to call him because he is my father. I have thought about it twice but didn’t want to then; now I do.”
“If you call him, he will come to take you away. I wanted... I wanted you to stay with me for a few days.”
“I don’t think that is a good idea.”
He lowered his head and stood up. He walked over to me and looked quite angry. “You know, you can continue to let what others think rule your life, but I won’t. I have tried everything possible to win you, but you can’t get past what people might think; it’s ridiculous. Lie to yourself all you want, but don’t try to lie to me. You were never really good at it.”
He turned around and walked out of the room, leaving me confused. I felt the need to go after him. I wasn’t sure what I was thinking. I quietly followed him. He went up into one of the spare bedrooms. I took a seat on the steps. Why did I care? Why did his walking away from me make me angry? I sat there and thought about it but couldn’t understand why I was upset. I got up and walked up the stairs, heading into the spare room.
He was sprawled out on the bed, and I sat beside him.
“This feels different. Normally, I would watch you as you tried to sleep. Listening to you snore,” he said.
“I do not snore.”
“You do, actually. Very lightly, though. You also talk in your sleep. Sometimes, you even throw a few punches.” He laughed at me and then sat up. “Want to lay with me?”
- Writer
