Yours Forever Book 3

16..

“How are you and Colin now?”

“He acted like he hated me at your party until my being shoeless got his attention. We talked, and I think we are okay now, even though I ended things with him.”

“Yeah, I noticed you weren’t wearing shoes as well, but then I figured Blake’s shoes wouldn’t fit you. I noticed you were wearing his clothes. I’m sorry you two broke up, but I won’t lie and say I’m not happy about it either.”

“That’s what I told Colin,” I replied, laughing. “And I know you hated us together, but it was nice for a while.”

Dean laughed a little and then went serious. “Ivy, I’ve been thinking. I have a question I want to ask you and you have to answer it. Don’t fight me like you did with my last question. This is important to me.”

I put my head down, unsure of what to do or say. I nodded. “Okay. What is the question?”

“Will you go on a date with me? Not like the ones that we used to go on, but one where we see how we would do with each other. I told you I loved you, and you said it back. This is the next reasonable step to take,” he replied. I could tell he was nervous.

I turned my head away from him. My body trembled a little bit and he grabbed my hand. I grew shy and my stomach started to feel sick due to the nerves.

“I’m not sure that is a good idea, Dean. I understand that you want to move forward with this, but I do not. I also just broke up with Colin and it wasn’t so I could instantly get into something else,” I replied, not even able to look him in the eye. My face must have been completely pink with blush right now.

“I know you said you were in love with me, and I told you that I loved you too, so I wanted to know if we could go on a date. Not like the ones we used to go on, but different.”

“I know this isn’t normal, Ivy. We have to work through this together though. More needs discussed and we could do that over a date night,” he said softly while pulling me into a hug.

I pulled out of the hug and looked him in the eyes. “I would rather not talk about my feelings. I told you them, isn’t that enough? I was never and would never act on them,” I replied, trying to hold back tears. I didn’t want this.

Dean looked down sadly. I was hurt by his reaction. I knew he wanted this. “Ivy, you don’t understand. I need you to say yes to this…please.”

It was my turn to look down sadly. “Why?”

“Ivy, look at me,” he demanded. I turned my eyes to him. He smiled at me. “Do you trust me?”

“Of course, I do, but...”

“No, buts. I need you to say yes.”

I sighed, “I can’t take being in love with my late mother’s husband,” I shouted, and tears started to fall from my eyes.

I felt so guilty for having these feelings for Dean. He was taking all this much better than I was. Yeah, he seemed nervous and afraid, shy even, but he was pushing for us to be together when I knew it was so wrong. I never intended to act upon my feelings for him. I just wanted them to disappear so that I could feel normal again.

I glanced at Dean. He wasn’t even looking at me, but was staring hard at a scratch that was on the table. He looked angry that I wouldn’t give in, but I had to hold my ground on this one. It was what was best. When he did finally look back at me. He smiled again and the anger was gone.

“You don’t have to answer now, Ivy. I will wait. I want you to know that I am just as nervous as you are about all this. Please don’t leave me hanging with no answer at all. I want you to think about it. I don’t want to go crazy trying to figure out what is going on in your head so if you could talk to me through this that would be great. I don’t know if I can handle a rejection from you. I want to see what we could become,” he said, making my face heat up.

“I just need some time to think, Dean. I promise that I will not leave you in the dark,” I replied, letting him hold my hand.

Dean gave me a small smile, but I could still see the worry on his face. My brain was already running a mile a minute trying to think about what the best thing to do was. He clearly wasn’t going to accept no for an answer. Every once in a while, Dean and I glanced at each other while we finished eating, but we didn’t say anything more about the subject.

It was almost midnight when we decided to go to bed. I quickly cleaned up our plates and started the dishwasher. As I went to walk upstairs, Dean once again grabbed my arm, stopping me. He gently spun me around to look at him.

“This could work, you know? If you were just willing to give it a shot with me, I know this could work,” he said in a whisper.

He was going to drive me crazy. Maybe I should just agree. If we were found out, there was bound to be hell to pay. I had also forgotten about my stalker. Who knows what he would do? It was just a war I didn’t feel like starting at the moment.

I put my head down and sighed. “I’m sorry, Dean. I don’t want to start a war right now between you and everyone else in my life. We have so much going on right now. I’m too scared. I will think more about it when everything isn’t so fresh.”

“I told you I wouldn’t let anything happen to you, Ivy. I meant it,” he replied sadly.

“Unless you don’t know something is happening to me. Like at Dagon’s,” I replied with a little harsher than I meant to be.

“I was there for you, Ivy. You just didn’t know it at the time, but I was. I will do better from now on,” he said. He looked hurt that I would even mention him not being there for me. “I’m sorry, for being pushy, Ivy. Go get some sleep. I am just nervous is all.”

“I understand why you are, Dean. It’s okay, goodnight.”

I turned back around and once again tried to make my way upstairs. “No, ‘I love you’ this time?”

I sighed and turned back around. “I love you, goodnight.”

“I love you too, Ivy. Goodnight.”

I went into my room, ignoring the mess, cleaned off my bed, and laid down. It felt so nice being back in my room, in my bed, that it didn’t take me long to fall asleep after closing my eyes.

I was woken up sometime later by someone sitting on the bed next to me. I sat up straight and quickly turned my light on. My stalker was staring at me. He had in his blood-red contacts, and he looked angry with me.

“You promised,” he whispered. His voice, covered up, made it sound more like a growl.

“I was going to. I wasn’t sure what to say to you, though. Then Dean wanted to talk to me, and by the time we were done, I was dead tired. I forgot.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t have to believe me. I don’t have to explain myself as I am, so if I want to lie to you, I can. It’s only fair.”

“I’ve never lied to you, Ivy.”

I laughed, “Then why don’t I know who you are? You have lied to me about what your real name is.”

“No, you asked me for my name, and I refused to answer. There is a difference. You never tried guessing, but now I will lie to you if you figure it out. It’s only fair,” he replied, laughing deeply.

“You’re an asshole,” I said, punching him hard in the shoulder.