You may Now Kiss the Lust

Chapter 5

Rinoa's POV

"Ma'am Rinoa." Ate Pasita knocked on my door.

Binaba ko iyong binabasa kong love letter na binalik ni Johan sa 'kin.

"Ano po iyon?!" Tamad na tamad akong tumayo at binuksan ang pinto.

"May nag-iwan po nito sa mail box, pangalan ninyo po ang nakalagay."

My brows furrowed. It was a small envelope. Kinuha ko ito. "Thank you ate Pasita." I smiled before closing the door.

Bumalik ako sa kama ko. Inusisa ang bawat sulok ng envelope. It was a plain white envelope with my name on it.

To: Rinoa Samantha Aguilar

My brows furrowed as I opened the sealed envelope. I wasn't wrong; it was a handwritten letter from I didn't know who.

Hi Rinoa,

I know you're not expecting anything from someone, but I really want to make your day.

I decided not to give you my name, but sooner or later you'll probably know me. For a while, just enjoy reading a letter from your stranger admirer :))

You know I've been eyeing for you since the first day I saw you. Wait, don't creep out. I'm not a stalker, I'm just a silent admirer.

I really hope one day you'll notice me, but for now I'll be patient. I know you have your problems, and I really wish this letter would ease the pain you have, even just for a little.

Smile please, as it will make not only my day, but other people's day.

From: Secret :))

My lips slowly formed a smile. I couldn't explain why, but the letter suddenly blurred out the pain I had. Masakit pa rin, oo, pero ang lakas makagaan sa dibdib ng sulat na nabasa ko galing kay... I didn't know who. Now I was curious.

"Rinoa," bulong ni Trixie sa tabi ko.

"Ano nanaman?" My brows furrowed.

I was busy listening to our prof while taking down notes. Malapit na ang finals namin at graduating kami, kailangan kong bumawi lalo't lagi akong late noong mga nakaraang araw.

"Tapos ka na sa plates mo?" she asked.

I shook my head. "Hindi pa, pwede wag mo munang ipaalala sa 'kin iyan?"

My head was just aching, sa tuwing naiisip ko iyong mga requirements na kailangan i-comply. Ginugulo pa rin ni Johan ang isip ko so I still wasn't in my best self.

"Sungit," bulong ni Trixie.

"Makinig ka na lang kasi sa prof," sambit ko.

She rolled her eyes. "Nakaantok eh."

Inirapan ko rin siya. "Edi matulog ka."

She just mocked me kaya hindi na 'ko kumibo at pinagpatuloy na lang ang pagte-take down ng mga notes.

At lunch time, si Trixie ulit ang kasama ko.

"Hoy ba't ang sungit mo? Mayroon ka ba ngayon?" she asked.

"Tingin mo?" I raised my right brow.

She laughed. "Mayroon nga."

She was right. Doble talaga ang irita ko sa tuwing menstruation day ko. Ewan ko ba, minsan ang sakit din kasi ng puson ko o kaya naman ulo. Bakit kasi hindi na lang lalake iyong nireregla, tutal mas gago naman sila.

We started eating quietly, until Trixie broke the silence.

"By the way sis, may balita ka na ba sa secret admirer kuno mo?" she asked.

Bigla akong napangiti nang maalala iyong sulat na natanggap ko kahapon.

"Wala nga eh. Sino kaya iyon 'no? I am really curious."

She looked around. "Dapat nagmamasid ka, baka may lalakeng madalas nakatitig sa 'yo." Naningkit ang mga mata niya, parang nag-iisip nang malalim. "May naiisip ka bang pwedeng magkagusto sa 'yo?"

Umiwas ako ng tingin to think deeply. Wala naman akong maisip. I didn't have so much guy friends, though I have few, iyong mga tropa ni Gerald, pero imposible namang magkagusto sa 'kin iyong mga iyon.

I shook my head. "Wala talaga."

"Seryoso ka? Wala bang lumalapit na lalake sa 'yo lately o nakikipag-usap-- wait o.m.g!" Her eyes widened. "Hindi kaya iyong lalakeng humalik sa 'yo sa school park--"

"Eww!" I cut her off. "Can you stop mentioning that guy to me? Kadiri 'pag naaalala ko." My body cringed like hell.

She laughed. "Sabi mo sa 'kin gwapo naman iyong kiss stealer na iyon."

Pinanlakihan ko siya ng mga mata. "Sabi ko may hitsura! I didn't say gwapo." I rolled my eyes.

"Gano'n na rin iyon, Rinoa."

"Basta hindi siya iyon! Cringe." Uminom ako ng tubig, natuyo na iyong lalamunan ko sa sobrang pandidiri.

"Edi hindi." She looked up, parang nag-iisip nanaman nang malalim. "O.m.g!" Her eyes widened, again. "Hindi kaya iyong best friend mo? Si Gerald!

"No way!"

She laughed. "Anong no way? Malay mo diba?"

"Finally!" Someone held my shoulders from my back.

Napatayo ako sa gulat. I saw Gerald's face laughing.

I punched his chest. "Mushroom ka ba ha?"

He was still laughing. "Bakit?"

"Anong bakit? Bigla-bigla ka na lang sumusulpot!"

Nagpatuloy siya sa pagtawa, kahit pa ang sama-sama na ng tingin ko sa kanya.

Trixie cleared her throat; I looked at her. She was smirking like crazy. Pinanlisikan ko siya ng mga mata at saka ako umupo ulit. Gerald sat beside me.

"Hi Trixie!" he greeted her.

"Hi Gerald," bati rin ni Trixie, at saka ako nginitian nang nakakaloko.

I just rolled my eyes on her, before facing Gerald.

"Ano ba iyon?" I asked him "Mamaya pa lunch time ninyo ah."

"I'm just checking on you. Baka mamaya hindi ka nanaman kumain, dahil lang sa Johan na iyon," aniya.

"I am eating. See that." I pointed my empty plate. "Ubos ko na nga oh."

He smiled. "Edi good." He looked at Trixie. "Trixie, can you do me a favor?"

My brows furrowed, but I just listened.

"Sure, anything for you."

Lalong kumunot ang noo ko sa sagot ni Trixie. She wasn't like that, inaasar niya 'ko kay Gerald, I knew it! Siya talaga iyong may gusto kay Gerald. She was reversing it to me.

"Great. Pwede sabihin mo sa 'kin kapag hindi nanaman nagkakain 'tong si Rinoa o kaya naman 'pag umiyak nanaman siya dahil sa manlolokong Johan na iyon?"

I punched Gerald's shoulder. "Ano ba kita? Tatay?"

He pinched my nose. "Best friend. Ayaw mo kasi gawing boyfriend eh."

My lips parted. I lost my words, I didn't know what to respond.

Bumalik ako sa huwisyo, dahil sa tawa ni Trixie. I just realized nakaalis na pala si Gerald sa harapan ko. I looked at my back, and there I saw him walking away.

"See that girl?! Sabi sa 'yo eh! Baka nga kay Gerald galing iyong letter sis. Baka siya iyong secret admirer mo."

Uminom ako ng tubig. My throat was getting dry.

I shook my head. "That's impossible."

"It's not!" She was still laughing. "And look at you! Blubbering because of him."

Lalong kumunot ang noo ko. "I don't know what you're talking about. Ikaw ata ang may gusto sa kanya. Stop reversing it to me."

"Aba pinasa mo pa sa 'kin ha. Come on, Rinoa!"

I raised my right brow. "Bakit totoo 'no? You like Gerald"

She laughed. "Who wouldn't?" Binato niya 'ko ng gamit na tissue, buti nakailag ako. "Kaya nga ang swerte mo na, ikaw iyong best friend niya. If I were you, I grabbed the opportunity to level up the relationship na."

I shrugged. "Well I'm not like you."

She sighed in surrender. "Fine, kung hindi si Gerald o iyong kiss stealer mo, edi sino? May naiisip ka pa bang iba?"

I shook my head. "Wala eh. Ah basta! Sabi naman sa sulat, I'll probably know him soon."

"Class dismissed!"

Finally, 'tapos na iyong last class namin. I was fixing my things when Trixie came to me.

"Iyong secret admirer mo naghihintay sa labas," she whispered.

I just rolled my eyes. I know who was she referring to. Palagi akong hinihintay ni Gerald, after class. Well nakasanayan na kasi naming sabay umuwi since highschool.

"Ang dami ngang kinikilig na babae, pati block mates natin," bulong niya ulit.

Sinakbit ko na iyong bag ko at bored siyang tinignan.

"First of all, he's not my secret admirer. Second, ano naman kung kiligin iyong mga babae sa kanya? I was so use to it."

Highschool pa lang kami, hearthrob na siya sa school namin. Gwapo naman kasi talaga siya. Women were drooling over him, but not me. Si Johan ang crush ko ever since, without realizing na nagpapakatanga lang ako sa kanya.

"Oo nga pala, best friend kayo since, kailan nga ba iyon?"

I shrugged. "Thirteen."

She nodded. "Right, you're so lucky."

I laughed sarcastically. "Swerte pa 'to sa lagay mo? Excuse me, just to let you remember, my boyfriend este ex boyfriend cheated on me. I am not luck as you think I am."

She nodded in surrender. "Yeah whatever," she said, sarcastically.

Bumeso ako sa kanya, bago lumabas sa room.

Nakita ko agad si Gerald with his wide smile and almond glittering eyes.

"Overtime nanaman prof ninyo," he chuckled. Inakbayan niya 'ko habang naglalakad kami papuntang parking.

"As expected. Ewan ko ba bakit siya pa last subject namin. Malas!"

"Okay lang iyan." Pinagbuksan niya 'ko ng pinto sa passenger's seat. "Swerte ka naman sa 'kin."

Sinuntok ko muna ang braso niya, bago ako sumakay sa kotse. He entered on the driver's seat and buckled his seatbelt.

"Pa'no naman ako naging swerte sa 'yo?" I raised my right brow.

He shrugged. "So you don't find yourself lucky to have me?"

Binaling ko ang tingin sa bintana. I played with my fingers as he started the engine.

"Edi swerte na nga." I didn't glance at him. "I'm lucky to have you as my best friend." I was shy to look at him kaya nanatili akong nakatingin sa bintana, still playing with my fingers.

"Same to you." He chuckled.

Napangiti na lang ako, habang nakatitig pa rin sa daan. I wanted to ask if he knew something about my secret admirer but my mind was hesitating so I chose not to.

Nang makarating kami sa bahay, inaya ko siyang mag-dinner since palagi naman niya 'kong sinasabay nang libre sa kotse niya. I should pay him back with simple deeds.

"Wala pa rin sila tita?" he asked.

We were done eating. Nakaupo na lang kami sa dining room at pinapababa ang kinain.

"Bukas pa raw uwi nila. Bakit? Manghihingi ka nanaman ng chocolates?" I laughed.

Tumawa rin siya. "Hindi na. Marami naman kami sa bahay."

"Wow getting mature."

He shrugged. "Matagal na 'kong matured 'no."

"I doubt that."

Tumawa kami hanggang sa balutin nanaman kami ng katahimikan.

"So how are you?" he broke the silence.

"Okay lang."

Araw-araw niya 'kong tinatanong kung kamusta ako, araw-araw okay lang din naman ang sagot ko.

"Palagi naman ganyan sagot mo kahit hindi."

"Okay nga lang talaga 'ko." I rolled my eyes, nagsisimula nanaman siyang mangulit.

"Liar," he whispered.

"Edi wag kang maniwala."

"Talaga. Alam mo kasi Rinoa, minsan okay lang ding umamin na hindi ka okay."

"Edi hindi na nga, happy?" I glared. "Alam mo naman na kasi iyong sagot, itatanong mo pa."

"Okay sorry," aniya.

"Ba't ka naman nagso-sorry?"

"Wala." He sighed. "Ano bang nararamdaman mo ngayon?"

"Tingin mo?"

Huminga siya nang malalim. "Broken ka pa rin kay Johan?"

I laughed. Tinaas ko iyong baso kong tubig lang ang laman.

"Cheers to that," sambit ko.

He smiled at tinaas din iyong baso niya. "Cheers."

"Ikaw, kamusta ka?" I asked him.

He chuckled. "Himala tinanong mo sa 'kin iyan."

I just smiled. I felt guilty. Na-realize ko lang, panay ang tanong niya sa 'kin kung kamusta ako, but I wasn't asking him the same.

"Kamusta ka nga?" ulit ko na lang.

"Okay lang, pero mas okay ako kung okay ka. Kalimutan mo na kasi iyong Johan na 'yon."

I sighed. "Sana nga madali lang gawin iyon eh."

He slightly smiled. "Kayang-kaya mo iyan. He doesn't even deserve you."

"Or I don't deserve him? Baka may kulang sa 'kin, baka may hindi ako nabigay?" My chest tightened.

Lumipat si Gerald sa upuan sa tabi ko. Umakbay siya sa 'kin at hinimas ang balikat ko.

"We both know you gave everything, right? Walang kulang sa 'yo, Rinoa. He's just plain stupid to fool you. Wag mong isiping may kulang sa 'yo; you are worth more than what you thing you are."

I smiled. "Sa'n mo ba napupulot iyang mga ganyang payo mo?"

He laughed. "Sa baul."

Umiling-iling ako, still grinning. "Mister love expert na n.g.s.b."

"N.g.s.b ka riyan?" He chuckled. "Sigurado ka?"

Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin. "Ah gano'n? So nagka-girlfriend ka, without me knowing?"

He shook his head, habang maloko siyang nakangiti. "I didn't say that."

I punched his chest. "Ang duya mo!"

He laughed. "Anong ginawa ko?"

"Tingin mo ano?" I raised my right brow and punched his chest. "Diba ang sabi natin, kapag nagkajowa dapat alam ng isa't isa. Bakit hindi ko alam na nagka-girlfriend ka na pala?!"

He laughed harder. "I didn't say that, Rinoa."

"Anong hindi? Nadulas ka na nga!"

"I was just teasing you," aniya. "Ito naman! Alam mo namang ikaw unang nakakaalam ng mga pangyayari sa buhay ko."

"Liar." I crossed my arms.

"I will never lie to you." He pinched my nose. "Oo na, n.g.s.b na 'ko. Inaasar lang kita kanina. Hayaan mo, ikaw unang makakaalam 'pag nagka-girlfriend ako."

I rolled my eyes. "You better be sure of that or else..."

"Or else what?"

"Or else friendship over na tayo!" I stood and walked upstairs on my room.

I heard Gerald's footsteps following me.

I stopped and looked back at him. "Hindi ka pa uuwi?"

He shook his head. "Maya-maya na."

Tumango na lang ako. Madalas naman siyang tumambay dito tuwing gabi. His father was allowing him to, since our family was really close to each other.

Naligo na muna ako; I could still remember the times na umiiyak ako kasabay ng shower ko, but I shouldn't cry now that Gerald was just outside, chilling in my room.

"Break na tayo."

Umiling-iling ako nang sumagi nanaman sa isip ko ang boses ni Johan. His words was killing me so bad.

I flinched when someone knocked on my bathroom's door.

"Rinoa! Matagal ka pa ba?!" Gerald shouted.

I rolled my eyes and off the shower.

"Ano nanaman ba iyon, Geraldine?!" My brows furrowed. Inalis ko ang sabon ng shampoo na bumagsak sa mukha ko.

"Natatae na 'ko, Rinoa. Patae!"

My lips parted. "Hindi pa 'ko 'tapos!"

"Please... lalabas na!"

"Doon ka na lang sa c.r sa baba!"

"Hindi ko na kayang maglakad sa malayo. Lalabas na talaga, patae na kasi!"

Huminga ako nang malalim. "Bahala ka riyan! Hindi pa nga ako tapos!"

"Rinoa, lalabas na! Gusto mo bang dito ako magkalat ng tae sa kwarto mo?!"

I sighed in surrender. Kinuha ko iyong robe ko at pinunasan ang katawan kong basang-basa pa. I wore my robe, habang punong-puno pa ng shampoo iyong ulo ko.

Pagbukas ko ng pinto, namamluktot si Gerald na akala mo mamamatay na.

I glared at him. "You'll pay for this," I whispered, bago siya makapasok sa banyo.

Ni'hindi niya man lang sinarado iyong pinto. Ako pa iyong nagsarado. Disgusting talaga!

Nakatayo lang ako, paikot-ikot sa kwarto ko. Tapos na dapat akong maligo ngayon, kung hindi niya ako inabala.

I knocked on my bathroom's door. "Matagal ka pa ba?!"

Nakabukas pa naman ang aircon ko. I hugged my soaking body.

"Wait lang!" He shouted.

I sighed. I didn't want to go downstairs to take a bath My hair conditioner was different from my parent's conditioner.

"Nilalamig na 'ko, Gerald!"

"Sa baba ka na maligo!"

"f**k you!" I felt really irritated.

Ilang segundo lang bumukas na iyong pinto. I rolled my eyes on him, habang nakangiti siya na parang nahihiya.

Tumakbo ako sa cabinet ko at kinuha iyong air freshener at saka nag-spray sa banyo.

"Ang baho!" I shouted to him, bago ko sinarado ang pinto.

"May tae bang mabango?!"

"Oo; tae ko!"

Nagpatuloy na ako sa pagligo. Hindi na nawala ang kunot sa noo ko. Abala naman kasi si Gerald; kaasar.

After taking a bath, I wore a blue silk pajamas. Pagkalabas ko sa banyo, my eyes widened when I saw Gerald holding a piece of paper.

Tumakbo ako at inagaw ito sa kamay niya.

"Hey!" I looked at the paper. Tama ako! It was the letter from my secret admirer. "Pakelamero ka pa rin talaga!" Tinago ko sa drawer iyong letter.

He laughed. "Secret admirer pala ha. Sino iyon ha?"

"Ewan ko!" I rolled my eyes. "Secret admirer nga diba?"

"Aba-aba; bakit di mo sinabi sa 'kin na nakatanggap ka pala ng ganyang letter?" He crossed his arms.

"I was about to say it to you later, pero nangialam ka, so yeah."

He smirked.

Habang nakatitig ako sa mga mata niya, narinig kong bigla ang boses ni Trixie.

"See that girl?! Sabi sa 'yo eh! Baka nga kay Gerald galing iyong letter sis. Baka siya iyong secret admirer mo."

My throat felt dry kaya napalunok ako.

"Hoy Gerald!" Nilaro ko ang mga daliri ko.

"Hoy ka rin! Sino iyang secret admirer mo na iyan ha?"

"Tell me honestly." Pilit kong tinaas ang noo ko, I managed to look at his almond eyes so deeply. "Ikaw ba iyong secret admirer na iyon? You were the one who gave me the letter to comfort me, were you?"