LEFT AT THE ALTER

Chapter 5

Wow, that's nice" I said

"What do you love to do" I asked

"Apart from creating Art, I like to go to the gym, it's my favourite place to be, I love travel and I like to cook too" he said

"That's nice, you love to cook ehn"

"Yeah, my mum actually taught me most of the receipes that I know today" he said

"That's beautiful then"

"What do you do?" He asked again

"I currently do not have anything I am doing recently, I just stay with my mother and Grandmother at the store and I think I am going to do more of painting" I explained.

"I actually work as an engineer in the construction company in town" he said

"Ohh, that's nice"

"You're beautiful and that dress is amazing" he said with a smile. "Sorry, I didn't mention it earlier. I was just too breathtaken to speak, you made me speechless.

"Thank you" I said with a smile. He was too nice, everything about him seemed perfect. I couldn't just believe it. I needed him to do something wrong, not only to justify the feelings that I was feeling but also to make Maria understand that it wasn't going to work. But he wasn't doing anything, he was too perfect.

I regretted what I had said next but I had said it and had even gotten home before I had realized.

"Just stop pretending already"

"What are you talking about" he asked confused

"All this Mr perfect, Knight in shinning armour. Its okay, we both don't have time to waste, especially me so just tell me the truth now"

"What are you saying really, I don't understand you at all" he said still confused.

"You know what I am talking about you"

"I am sure you even know all that happened to me. You're probably just also being all nice to me like the man who carried me for free the other day. I am not you'll charity case" I said still going on and on and not even thinking to stop and think about what was even going on and about what I was saying.

"What is all this, I am out of here, waiter please bill" he said

"You know I can pay my own bills, i have my own money" I said as I watched him give the waiter his card

"I really thought you were going to be different " he said angrily as he picked up his things to leave

"I thought you would be different too!!" I exclaimed as he walked away and I just watched him leave. Everyone in the restaurant had turned to look at me when I shouted.

I left minutes after and as I entered the uber home, what I had done minutes back started coming to my head and then I realized how I had been acting crazy to someone who had done absolutely nothing but be nice and sweet to me since I waljed into that restaurant.

I didn't keep an open mind and I knew it. I wanted to find his faults no matter where he was hiding them. I just couldn't believe that he wasn't putting on a facade.

My ride home was sad as the driver even put on sad music as he drove me home. I messed it up and I knew but I wasn't really bothered since I wasn't actually ready for anything but I was feeling horrible for treating him in that manner and for not even trying ti give him a chance.

There was nothing I could do now to undo all the damage that I had done so I just rested my head by the window and enjoyed my ride home.

I got to home, I wondered if mother and Grandma will still be up but it was almost past the time both of them went to sleep so I wasn't really expecting to see anyone awake so no one was going to see me sad face.

I entered the house but then I realized the lights were still on and mother was still up. I walked closer to were she was as I sat down next to her.

"Why are you still awake by this time" I asked

"I was waiting up for you" she answered

"What for? You know I will be fine"

"I wanted to give you this" mother said as she handed over a set of brush to me. It was fathers, it was different from the ones that were in the basement. These were his favourite brush and he would always say that he used it to paint only the important art pieces

"How mum, how do you have it" I asked

"He wanted you to have it and I didn't bring it back since you had said you weren't interested in art again till recently and I was hoping it will help you figure things out more clearly" mother explains and then I hugged her.

"Thanks mum" I said. At least there was something to cheer me up after the terrible night I had just had.

"How was your date tonight by the way, you didn't really look happy when you came in" mother asked

"I messed it up" I said as I rested my head on her shoulder

"Don't worry, at least you tried and I am really proud of you for that" mother said trying to make me feel better.

The night was a long one as I still filled my head with thoughts of Mike and going through my social apps wondering if he had unblocked me. I wondered when he was going to decide to do that. I also thought deeply about the crazy act I had displayed and what Andrew probably thought about me now and if he would even ever consider going out with me again. he wasn't even a bad guy at all and I just made him feel that way for nothing. I wondered if this was how I was going to continue to be like and if I was ever going to completely heal from all that had happened.

I didn't leave with Grandmother and mother when they were leaving for the store this morning. I decided to stay back a bit. It felt like there was a plan in my head which I needed to execute.

My phone wouldn't stop buzzing as Maria and Mary wouldn't stop texting to ask how the date went on our group page.

Maria: How was it

Mary: why is it taking so long to reply

Maria: you know you need to say something, you can't just keep mute forever.

Mary: please say something.

I was ignoring the messages since I woke up because I didn't even know what to say to them but then I had to reply unless I knew the friends I had and how they were going to keep texting till they got a reply from me.

Me: it was okay" I lied, not wanting to tell them how I had totally embarrassed myself and acted like a crazy woman in the restaurant in front of a person I was meeting for the first time.

Maria: ohh, that sounds like something good.

Me: yes, he was okay, handsome, sweet but

Mary: but what?

Maria: did something happen

Even though I didn't want to tell them, I knew they were going to find out either ways or I was eventually going to even reveal it to them myself. Do I just decided to tell them.

Me: I messed it all up, I told him about how I knew he was weird like every other story I read about online dating and that he should just tell me the truth and stop pretending and then I went on and on about all of it.

Maria; what!!!

Me: what was I supposed to do, I panicked, he seemed too good to be true.

Mary: seems our friend here isn't ready to open her heart to anyone or anything

Maria: But how would you even think he was pretending.

Me: how was I supposed to know that he was not pretending though.

Maria: by actually listening to him and giving him a chance.

Mary: it is the first time she is going out since Mike, at least let's applaud her for effort.

Me: thank you for understanding me Mary.

Maria: alright then, thank God I have another date set up for you this evening, I knew the first one was most likely going to be a disaster.

Me: what!!! Another one!!!, I haven't even recovered from this one

Maria: I already did and there is nothing you can do about it, I will send you the details and all you need to know.

I couldn't understand how Maria felt setting me up for another date was the problem to my solution. I just really felt like I still wasn't mentally ready for all of this and that they were just making me suffer. I missed Mike a whole lot and mostly now, I just think of the good memories we had together in order not to turn the love that I had for him to hate because of what he had done to me.

I went into the basement, I wanted to make my first painting since forever, I took along the brush mother had given to me the night before. As I sat on the chair with the canvas in front of me, memories of father came flooding my head again as I picked up the paint brush not knowing what art I wanted to make but then I remembered what father once told me that "Art is beautiful, its amazing. You just have to let it flow from within, hold the brush and let the passion from within take over the drawing" he would say.

I did exactly that as I let my passion and what I was feeling take over and by the time I was done. I had made a very fine art, it wasn't perfect but it was done with everything I was feeling and the passion inside.

It took me a few hours to get done with my painting though and then when I was done, I decided to go to help at the store.

I was watering the flowers when I saw a little girl and her mum walk into the store. Mother was back going through the finances and Grandmother was sorting out the new seeds we had just gotten to grow so I was the only one who was available to respond to the customer.

"How may I help you today" I asked as they walked up towards me.

"Hello, please I am looking for Roses and I knew I could get here" she said.

"Sure, you will get anything you want here" I said "There are our roses, where we grow them" I said as I walked forward to show her the big space we set apart for growing "but we ha e once that ate already packed and ready for sales" I explained

"Ohh, wow, where are those too" she asked and as she admired the flowers and checked through each of the bouquets.

"Hello pretty girl" I said to the little girl that had been standing next to her. She was about 5 years in age.

"Are you not the bride that was left at the alter" she suddenly said

"Mercy!!" Her mother cautioned as she immediately turned towards us. What a young girl, how did she even know. Where people talking about it that much that a five year old girl also knew what was going on. There was nothing I could do but I had just faked a smile

"I am so sorry about what my daughter said" her mother apologised.

"It's fine" I assured.

"I will get this one" she said point in the direction of the bouquet in front of her.

"Alright, I will help you with packing" I said as I packed it up for her, she made her payments and then left.

I watched as the girl and her mother walked out. I remembered how I and Mike had talked about kids and building our family.