The Alpha and His Song

Trust Issues Pt. 1

Odette stared at the computer asking her for the password. The cursor was mocking me with its blinking. I sighed, “This is ridiculous. Just type in the password. You don’t have to answer his emails. You can just read them. You need to know if they somehow found Lux already. I typed in my password and pulled up my email. I gasped. I had fifty seven emails from Lux and Beatrice. I snorted, “I am not reading all of those.” It was a lie. I was far too curious. I scanned the email titles. I clicked on the one that read PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE SAFE. He was using all caps. The poor man might be having a heart attack or something. Don’t feel bad for him! He was going to capture you, Odette. He’s mad at your mom. Noxus and Caspian are going to be upset over the fact you were born. That’s what he said. This is not a person we care about having a heart attack! What is wrong with you?!

I tried not to be worried about Lux Vennon, but I really was. I groaned. I’m a glutton for punishment apparently. I took a deep breath and started to read the email.

Katie -

Please answer to let us know if you are safe. I do not know why you left. We tried to find you. There is so much you don’t know about. You are in danger from things I cannot explain properly via email. We tried to track your IP address, but it’s being blocked. Katie, I know that’s not your real name. I need you to trust me just a little bit. Tell me if you're safe. I can answer questions you must have. I would if I were you. Things just seem odd to you sometimes, don’t they? You feel things should be strange to you because they are to others; however, to you they are not.. I can help you.

Lux Vennox

I sat back. Jarchi must be some kind of technological guy. Or he paid someone who was. Either way I was happy he’d done that. I didn’t even think about them tracking me down from my emails. Melanie would’ve. She was a technical genius. She was insanely good with computers. I wondered what happened with the money I’d given her to invest. Even though she was young, she was brilliant. I shook those thoughts. I opened a draft.

Mr. Vennox,

I left because I heard you. You know my mother, and she will literally kill me if she finds out I’m looking for Lux, my brother not you. Then you said Noxus and Caspian would be upset with her because of me. Believe me when I say, I don’t want there to be a reason my mom is upset with me. Please don’t tell her we met. Please leave me and my brother alone. We barely know our mother. Lux hasn’t had contact with her in eleven years. She’s been mad at him for leaving her. She said he’s like everyone else. I don’t know what that means or honestly why she cares he left. I only see her when I’ve made her mad, or we are moving. Then she’s gone again. I like it here. I don’t want to leave. Tell Noxus and Caspian I am sorry. I don’t know what my mom did or I did to them.

I don’t question things anymore. That’s how you end up strapped to a bed while people don’t talk to you and jab you with needles. I won’t go back there. I don’t have questions.

It seems silly to sign Katie when you know that isn’t my name.

I hit send before I could talk myself out of it. I clicked through some of the other emails. They were mostly asking if I was ok, and asking why I left. A ding sounded and I felt like my heart was in my throat. I saw Mr. Vennox had already answered me. Why did I want to read it? Why did I feel like we had this connection? We didn’t. So he had my brother's name. Leave it alone Odette…Just…UGH! I clicked on the email. I sighed, “You are so dumb, Odette.”

Not Katie,

You heard us? You have quite good hearing then, don’t you? Who is your father out of curiosity? You didn’t understand what you heard. Please know that. We mean you no harm. We want to help you. I do know your mother. Quite well actually. We were very close as children. I would rather explain Caspian and Noxus in person. Please come back. No one is upset with you. I do not speak to your mother anymore. That much I can promise you. I haven’t for quite some time. Let’s say she was kicked out of our lives and vanished.

Where is here, not Katie? Where are you?

What do you mean strapped down? Who did that?! Where was your mother?!

Is your name Odette? It’s an old family name. The last girl in the family was actually your mother. It’s been quite some time since there was a girl. Odette is the name that should be passed to the next female. Is that your name?

Please let me help you. I promise nothing bad will happen if you ask me a question. I will answer. I swear it.

Lux Vennox

I bit my lip and began to pace. He’s already said he can’t find me. That could be a lie, but if it was….I’m pretty sure he’d be banging down my door. Family. I gasped. I went back and re-read the email six times. Lux Vennox was my family. That’s what he was saying. Wasn’t it? I had to know. Did I have other family members out there? Tears filled my eyes. Is that why I made that weird sound and he did too? We were family.

Mr. Vennox,

Are you saying we are family? Is that why we made that weird sound? That’s not normal. You know that right? Normal people don’t whistle when they meet family. This is crazy.

I don’t trust people. I trusted someone and he hurt me. He put me in that place, and my mom let him. She said I embarrassed her. The whole situation was crazy. It was a fine happy sixteenth birthday to me.

If you mean it….about asking questions…..if…and I’m not saying I do…..if I started hearing a song in my head…..would you know anything about that? Or…and again not saying I do…but hissing too. In your head. Again, not saying any of that is happening. It’s all hypothetical.

My name is Odette.

I hit send and slammed my computer shut. I put my head on my desk. I lightly banged it. I yelled, “What are you doing Odette? You can’t trust him. You don’t know him.” I felt the voice in my head was trying to push trust at me. I snorted, “What do you know? You weren’t around for that stint in a mental facility. You be trusting, and I’ll avoid my email since apparently I have no freaking willpower to not answer people.

I got ready for bed but I just tossed around. I missed Keaton. OH MY GOD NO YOU DO NOT! YOU JUST MET HIM! Be normal, Odette. Just be normal. We are not head over heels for a man we just met. We don’t wish he was beside us and we are not a we! Stop talking to yourself. Stop it! UGH! I threw the covers off me and began to pace in my bedroom. What if Lux and Beatrice were out there? What if Caspian and Noxus were? What if I got kidnapped? Again. God, that would be embarrassing.

The song started humming in my head. What? Is Keaton here? I ran to the window. The song was quiet, but then when I looked in the direction of the tree line it got louder. I snorted, “Dumb song. That’s a large dog or something. That’s not Keaton.” It looked like a large black dog, but it was pretty far away. I wanted to go outside and try to find it to pet it. I yelled, “OH MY GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! We do not go outside and try to find massive stray dogs to pet. Even if they do look super adorable from a great distance that you should not be able to see in the freaking dark. Why has my life gotten so crazy since I moved here? It was beginning to feel overwhelming. I missed Keaton. I missed him as if I’d known him my entire life. Was I really that lonely? Some guy was nice to me, and I practically jumped him. I flushed red. I’d seen guys like this all over the country. They were nice until they had s*x then they stopped calling texting. How many times had I heard some girl crying over the senior or junior who did that? What was I doing? Even Luke. He was nice then we had s*x and he got mean, fast.

Keaton wasn’t like that though. Where did that thought even come from? I don’t know him. This is insane. I thought Luke was nice. Ok, no that’s not true. I thought Luke was nice to me and he cared. I was wrong on the caring part, and he definitely did a one eighty on the being nice to me part. I really felt with every fiber of my being that Keaton was different. I groaned, “This place is making me crazy.” The thought of leaving though made me want to curl up in a ball and cry. I didn’t get any sleep. Eventually, I got too excited at the thought that Keaton would be here soon. I went into my closet. I decided if my face was going to look like a sleepless trainwreck I wanted to look nice. I laughed going through some of the clothes. My mother would die if she saw this wardrobe Jarchi got me. She liked me wearing much less….fitted attire. I wanted to figure out what I liked though. I found a cute skirt and top. It was easy with everything being set out. I jumped in the shower. I got out and loosely curled my hair. I actually used some foundation because I looked tired. I put my outfit on and nodded, “Ok, this is good. I can’t tell you’re exhausted. Just a little tired.”

The song started softly in my head. I snorted, “Is it actually Keaton this time, or a cute large black dog?” The song got louder and I swear it was annoyed with me. I was losing my mind. Someone knocked on the door. Well, a large black dog can’t knock. So, Keaton was here. I couldn’t keep the smile off my face. I ran to the door and threw it open. Way to look casual, Odette. Real good job here. We are corresponding with someone we absolutely should stop talking to, and now we can’t find a small amount of chill with the guy we like.

I noticed he looked tired too. A large part hoped he missed me like I missed him. He growled my name. I blushed embarrassed about how much that turned me on. We were making out until my phone rang. I was both grateful and annoyed. I dated Luke for seven months before we had s*x. I’d say maybe I missed s*x and that was why I was so into Keaton; however, I didn’t even orgasm. I couldn’t be missing s*x could I? I answered the phone. Keaton could hear Lee talking to me. Was his hearing like mine? I almost asked him, but then I remembered the look on Luke’s face on my birthday. The total flip of a switch he did with me. It kept me quiet. I couldn’t have someone else think I was crazy. I really didn’t want Keaton to think I was crazy. The very thought hurt my soul. The voice in my head sang a sad tune. My little song was an emotional little thing, but to be fair, lately…so was I. So, that made sense. The voice in my head was me, but it wasn’t.

I thought about the voice in my head on the way to school. I really should check my email. Maybe Lux Vennox could help me. If he really didn’t like my mom then he had to know helping me would piss her off. It actually made me want to talk to him more. Any passive aggressive way I could back at her, I was taking at this point. I was just a whole basket of mentally unhealthy lately. I still couldn’t believe she wanted me to stay with Luke.

When we walked inside the school, Keaton was honest to god growling at the girls who threw evil looks my way. I teased him about being the wolf god, Fenrir. What could I say? I liked all things supernatural for a really long time. Ok, I still liked it. I just thought the concept was cool. I accidentally told him I was into that type of stuff. God, he’s going to say I’m crazy. I was cringing internally. Recoiling, ready for the slap Luke would’ve delivered. Keaton didn’t slap me though. He surprised me by being into supernatural things. What? The super hot senior jock was into vampires, werewolves, and everything in between? Was he literally perfect? Keaton kissed me after he walked me to my class.

Several girls glared at me until Immy snapped, “What are you looking at?” They instantly looked away. Immy snorted, “That’s what I thought.” I laughed, “It’s expected. I’ve seen it literally a hundred times.” Immy frowned, “They should mind their own business.” They didn’t. I heard the girls in the back of the class talking. One sighed, “He’s finally done with Lisa, and the new girl gets him? That’s not fair!” I snorted. Life wasn’t fair. If anyone knew that it was me. The other girl hissed, “What even is she? Keaton deserves better.” What am I? Seriously? Was this town that big on townies versus out of towners? That was insane. The voice in my head was lightly hissing. I was actually grateful it just wasn’t loud hisses.

I waved to Immy when the bell rang. I walked around the corner and my book was knocked out of my hands. Before I met Melanie, I’d have looked down and gathered my books quickly. I didn’t though. I looked up glaring. They weren’t expecting that. I said, “I’ll assume you lost all sense of decorum and will find it after this encounter. I’m someone you can’t bully or demean into behaving how you’d like me too. You don’t like that I have a date with Keaton? Good for you. Newsflash, I do not care.” Another girl came around the corner. The girls ignored me and knocked a book out of her hands. Pages flew everywhere. She gasped and started picking them up.

I hissed, “LEAVE!” The girls turned their necks then looked stunned. Ok, that was not normal. They took off. I snorted, “Weirdos.” The bell rang. The halls were empty. I began to help the girl pick up her pages. I looked at one. I gasped. It was a beautiful wolf. I picked up another one, it was Justin. He looked strong and handsome. Another picture was of a beautiful spot in a forest somewhere. I handed the pages back to her.

I said, “You really capture what you draw. That’s rare. There’s life in those sketches. I’m Katie.” I stuck out my hand. She sighed, “Isla Kipner.” I smiled, “Well, I’ve been in lots of schools, and these are the best sketches I’ve seen. I’ve been to school art fairs too. You are really talented.” Isla whispered, “I made you late.” I shrugged, “I’m new. The teacher won’t even bat an eye. That’s a good drawing of Justin.” Isla looked up, “You know him?” I nodded, “Yup. We are friends….I think. I said we could be.” Isla looked down. She asked, “Do you know who I am?” I laughed, “Isla Kipner. My memory isn’t that bad, you just introduced yourself to me.” Isla sighed, “I’m Lisa’s sister.” I titled my head, “You have my sympathies then. She gives off only child vibes. I guess you got all the nice in the family gene pool.”

Isla laughed. She said, “My brother is nice too. He’s the oldest. We’ve tried to connect with Lisa. I used to think she and I were really close, but….then she dated the guy I like.” My eyes widened, “Your sister started dating Justin because you like him?” She nodded sadly. I pulled her in for a hug before I realized what I was doing. I said, “That’s awful. I’m so sorry.” Isla hugged me for a moment before she pulled back. She told me, “I won’t be good for your popularity. Lisa isn’t popular in her grade, but the girls in our grade and lower are her minions. They make my life hell.” I frowned, “Well, not anymore they don’t. You stick with me, Isla. I have a feeling we will be great friends.” Isla looked at me incredulously. I said, “Well, I’ll see you at lunch. Ok?” She nodded vigorously and left. Poor girl.

I hustled to my next class. The teacher actually laughed and said the halls were hard to navigate and I’d get the hang of it. When I made it to English I’d just sat down when the song started. I smiled knowing Keaton was coming. He sat by me. It felt like something clicked inside me. A missing piece that was lost and was back. This was getting ridiculous, but I could at least enjoy it for now.

When we went to lunch I remembered I hadn’t done well at sticking to my mom’s diet. Immy didn’t care though. My heart melted when Keaton called me Hathor. Did he like god and goddess mythology too? Hathor was Egyptian, not Norse. He really was perfect. Perfect for me. STOP IT! You are sixteen. It’s rare for sixteen year old’s to find their forever. Just find some chill. GOD! Be cool for five seconds.

May said, “How are classes going today?” I shrugged, “Fine.” I saw Isla with Justin. I smiled, they looked cute together. Much cuter than Lisa and Justin. Plus Justin looked far more relaxed. I called over to them to join us. Keith said, “Uhh Katie. Whatcha doing?” I said, “They are my friends.” Keith’s jaw dropped. Justin and Isla sat down. Justin sighed, “I should go.” I frowned, “No, you should stay. Sit with Isla. Don’t you two just look adorable together? How’s your day going?” Justin looked nervous. He replied, “It’s actually been nice. Pretty drama free.” I laughed, “If only Isla and I could say the same.” Keith asked, “What now?”

Keaton sat down. It was tense for a few moments but everyone settled down. Apparently, no one knew how talented Isla was at drawing. Justin seemed quite proud and pretty envious I’d seen her sketches. Afterwards, Keaton walked me to the gym. I went to the locker room, changing into my gym clothes. I walked in and saw Isla. I smiled and walked over to her. I said, “So, we have gym together.” She laughed asking me, “Are you by chance good at basketball? I’m fast, but not a basketball star.” I said, “I’m not great, but I’m not bad.” One girl sneered, “And you’re dating the captain of the basketball team.” Isla sighed, “Leave her alone.” Another girl said, “It’s pathetic, really.”

I smiled and asked them, “So you guys are good at basketball? I didn’t picture Lisa as a sporty girl.” Isla said, “She’s the least coordinated person I know. She also hates running. She doesn’t play basketball.” I said, “Huh. I just got the impression these girls think Keaton should be with a basketball player. Are you guys on the girls team?” They flushed. One said, “Shut up, new girl.” I laughed, “Ohh burn. Calling me the new girl. Well, I never. Also that was a no. You’re not on the basketball team.” They growled. Isla growled back. I snorted, “This school and the growling, man.” Isla coughed, “Yeah…it’s a thing in this area.” I smiled, “I’ll have to work on mine. Unlike some people, my bite is worse than my bark. I’d keep that in mind ladies.” Isla smiled at me.

We were playing doubles. Isla and I did pretty good. I was pretty sure I’d dialed into who Isla was in the high school hierarchy. She was the talented younger sister of a b***h who was keeping her in the shadows. Often, that was the older sister who was popular and a shy younger sibling. I amended it because her sister was a serious b***h. Who clearly had her friends out to get her little sister. I body checked one of the girls going for a cheap fowl on Isla. She growled at me. I hissed at her and clapped a hand over my mouth.

The girl snorted, “Freak!” It hurt even though I didn’t want it to. I snorted, “Says the girl who is growling. If I’m a freak I’m in good company growly mcgrowlerson.” She sneered at me. I said, “Watch it, or your face will get stuck like that. When you grow up, you’ll regret that. High school ends ladies. You may think you’re hot s**t inside these walls, but there’s a whole world out there. Out there you aren’t hot s**t, and the world has no problem informing you of that.” They looked at me as if I’d lost my mind. I was right though so I didn’t care.

Isla went with me to the locker room. She said, “Wow, you’re not like regular new students.” I said, “I don’t let people push me around anymore. I met someone who taught me about my power. Their words hurt even if I don’t want them to sometimes, but they will never know that. I won’t let them see me sweat, and I won’t let them get away with trying to make me feel bad. You shouldn’t either. You have something they don’t.” Isla asked, “What?” I said, “Class. You’re talented and pretty. They are pretty but they aren’t nice They are skating by, and when they graduate some will be lucky if that continues. Most get slapped in the face with reality. The world is harsh place and it doesn’t owe you anything. It’s certainly not going to give anything.” Isla smiled, “You’ll be a good lun….person.” I laughed, “I try to be a good person.”

We walked in on one girl with Isla’s clothes. They were about to rip them. I asked, “Don’t you have something better to do?” She ripped the clothes. Isla cried, “Why would you do that?” They laughed. Isla sighed, “I’ll be wearing gym clothes the rest of the day.” One sneered, “It’s smelly Isla all over again.” I rolled my eyes. I said, “I have an extra set of clothes in my locker. My mom’s boyfriend went all out on my new wardrobe. You’ll look amazing.” They glared at me. I shooed them, “Run along minions of Satan. Don’t think I won’t report this.” They growled, “You wouldn't dare.” I laughed, “Oh, I but I do dare.” I stared them down. They left. Isla said, “You don’t have to do that.” I snorted, “Oh yes, I do. You should too.” Isla said, “We have our own system here.” I shrugged, “Screw that system. These girls are getting away with being bullies. I’m guessing because they are protected by your sister.” I wiped away a few tears for Isla. She was a shy, quiet girl, and that used to be me. This clearly wasn’t a first time offense with those girls. She had been quietly dealing with this. Why did the world always put down nice people? Where was the karmic justice in that? As if high school didn’t suck enough.

Isla thought about it before answering me, “Yes and no. The stuff they do is minor so it doesn’t seem like a big deal.” I frowned, “Yes, it is. Bullies are bullies. They don’t stop unless you stand up to them. Or speak up. We are speaking up. Let’s go.” Isla said, “Uhh, I’ll just go with our system.” I shook my head, “Nope, come on.” I took her to the office. Riley was there. She smiled, “Hello Katie.” I smiled, “Hi Riley. Some girls in our gym class ripped up Isla’s clothes.” I gave the ripped clothes to her. Her jaw dropped. I said, “I gave her some of my spare clothes, but they should at least have to replace what outfit they ripped.” Riley snorted, “Yes, they should. I’ll take care of this.” She winked at Isla who smirked. I shrugged, “Let’s go, Isla.” Isla said, “Thank you Gam…Riley.” She laughed, “Of course Isla.” Isla and I parted ways as the bell rang for class to end.

I smelled Keaton. I smiled and took off towards him. He was confronting those girls. Why did everyone talk so loudly here? I told him it wasn’t a big deal. They whispered about me being a freak. I mean they weren’t wrong. I had a singing hissing voice in my head, but they growled all the time. So I wasn’t alone in that department.

I was stunned Keaton didn’t know Lisa had friends. Of course she did. People wanted to be around him. Clearly. I hadn’t even been here that long and I knew that. Keaton’s eyes began to flicker to black. I shook myself that was crazy. I looked around the halls. Several people observed Keaton then gave him a wide berth. They were looking at each other and then me. Keaton brushed it off when I brought him back to the moment. We ended up being in the same class. Keaton was glaring at everyone except me. Keith was in this class with us. He mouthed to me, “What happened?” I shrugged, “Lisa?” He rolled his eyes.

Keaton and Keith seemed to be having some twin conversation. I was taking notes, and told Keaton the right answer when the teacher asked him. The teacher clearly wanted to make an example of him, but then he’d gotten the answer right. The song in my head did not like this teacher. When school ended Keaton was still upset. Even when we got back to my place. I thought some fresh air would do us good.