You're Killing Me, Mate.

5. White Walls are Easier to Clean

"Guilt has very quick ears to an accusation." -Henry Fielding

Merkson places the keys on my open hand. His long fingers touched my small palm and I am oddly comforted by the momentary warmth of it.

"This is all yours now" he smiles kindly to me. The boy still hasn't changed. He is still all smiles and toothy grins. He is still the boy who saved me from dying by being carved like a tree. "As you can see we've remodeled it to your request. Three rooms and an office with a bathroom of its own."

Mom and Dad has gone in before me. They were measuring dimensions so that they could already furnish the whole place themselves. They've always liked furnishing houses, it's some sort of control issue that they have

I grunted in answer while looking around the place. White walls until the hall with four doors. There is even a reception desk that you'll see the moment you enter the room. A couch and a few chairs for people to sit on while they wait.

It truly looked like the dream clinic of any psychologist. I touch the surface of the desk, I am still debating whether this is the right thing to do. I said yes because of my parents and not because I wanted to do it. I just ca can't stand them being miserable in the dungeons.

"So, do you like it?" Merkson says, expectantly. He has a look of hope close to a young pup would. His dark hair gelled back and blue eyes piercing through mine

"It's enough" was all that I can say through the mess in my head. "I still don't think anyone would come"

"They will because they have to." Merkson answers, his eyes devoid of the childishness but a blank almost sad expression in them now. "You see Mirage, you know the history of the pack. How Frier's mother is a feral wolf or has the wild wolf gene. It's also very prevalent in the pack. We really need more success stories like Luna Fiona most members who has mates outside just gets rejected or some runs away. It wouldn't be fair if they don't fulfill the Moon Goddesses will and gift to us"

Like it is your gift to dieEros says. I'm blindsided by her assault through my defenses, her voice clear and on the forefront of my mind. I breathed in slowly then out

"I'm sorry, did I upset you?" Merkson gently says, he places his hand comfortingly on my shoulder.

I shake my head and give him a silver of a smile. He looks shock at the sight of it, but I ignored it. "Nothing, it's just my wolf reminding me I have to die"

He frowns "Why would she do that? You're her human"

"Didn't you know? Our wolves don't have to actually like us" It was meant to be a rhetorical question as I gently move away from him while trying to change the subject. "Are you sure my parents are welcome here?"

He nods "The Alpha has given us strict rules to welcome you and your family and accept the help that you're giving"

Mom comes out from one of the rooms. She scoffs, hearing what Merkson has just said. "Help that we're giving" she mutters under her breath while going behind the reception desk. "This is a good place."

I smile at her "I take it you're going to be the receptionist?"

She mirrors my smile "Of course, who else? Your dad would be the guard. He insists"

"I've...it's nice to see you smile Mirage. I've never seen you like this before" Merkson whispers, I look at him and see his eyes just held awe and admiration. "You've been...miserable in high school"

I pat his shoulder in comfort. "You saved my life, I owe you a smile rather than giving you the cold b***h act"

"I've got to admit, you're really pretty" Merkson nervously shifts on his feet.

Mom giggles behind me. "Aw, look who's smitten with my baby"

Merkson's face was flush and I can only laugh at the present predicament. I thought of Miguel who was probably feeling really lonely in the house. He's going to leave soon, actually in two days' time, yet I still haven't told him that we're not going back.

"Oh, no I'm not Ma'am. I already have a mate" Merkson smiles at the mention of his mate.

It's sweet how he is. I decided that I like Merkson, he's a good guy through and through.

"Ooh, who is it?" Mom props her elbows on the desk and leans her chin on her hands. "Is it someone we might know?"

"Actually" he looks at me with a worried glance. "Mirage does know her"

I tilt my head to the side, figuring it out as to who it can be. "Who?"

"It's Quin" he stares at me, anticipating my reaction

Quin.

She's still alive and here. Deima hisses. She pulls her own hair in frustration

Should have killed her when we had a chance Eros bites her own paw at the same irritation.

It's been a while since we felt the same way to a person. It's a tad bit disappointing to know that Merkson, the sweetest and gentle man, is mated to Quin. The Moon Goddess can truly be cruel.

"I'm happy for you" is all I say to Merkson who was waiting for my answer while gauging out my reaction. "Are you happy with her, yes?"

He grins and nods "I am. I really am" the way he looked at me and the way he said those words feels like there is something more he's trying to communicate to me. I furrow my brows at him.

"Is everything okay?"

He seems to snap out of it and nods "Yeah, anyway I'm also here to take any of your complaints about the office"

I look at Mom who just smiles sweetly at me. "I don't think so and it seems Dad hasn't stormed out of the rooms with flames. So, I think it's safe to say we're good"

"Okay, I'll leave you guys to enjoy the place then" he smiles and waves goodbye.

Once he was out of the room, Mom gives me a questioning look. She raises her brows while licking her lips in a devilish way.

"So" she starts, and I can't help but release a sigh. "This Quin girl is she someone we like, or I have to visit downstairs to turn her insane?"

"Mom you won't do such a thing"

"So, she's one of those kids." She states

"Mom don't" I warn

She frowns while leaning back on her chair and pouted like a kid. "I have always known my daughter is an angel, I didn't think your good graces would reach such God like forgiveness"

"Mom" I say with a tired sigh.

"I'm just saying. I don't mind you being kind and innocent and pretty and nice. You're my pride and joy but it wouldn't hurt to have fun, you know? A bit of revenge on a silver platter or let your demon mother sneak in the dark of the night and give her sanity a run for its money"

I can't help but c***k a smile at her "You're ridiculous"

She shrugs "you look as if I'm joking. I am your mother, the people who hurt you would get hurt even worst"

"I am also your father who'll take everything for your happiness" Dad emerges out of one of the rooms. He kisses my cheek before going to Mom and kissing her chastely on the lips. "What is this talk?"

"Well, there is this girl mated to our daughter's savior."

"friend or I have another name to add to Satan's list?" Dad pulls Mom from her seat only to slip on the chair and putting her on his lap.

"You guys are ridiculous. Nothing would come out from beating people in to a pulp" I frown while I widen my eyes to make my strong-willed parents not do what they're wanting to do.

The two of them stares at me then turned to each other. "our daughter is an angel"

Dad gruffly sighs "I love our daughter, but Angels are such a drag to raise"

"Hey" I glare at them. "I'm here, you know"

Mom glances at me with mock pity in her eyes. "Thank the seven fires of hell that we love her"

"two demons with an angel daughter. Ha! sounds like a start of a knock knock joke"

"Whatever. I'm going back home. Make me a portal Dad."

Dad chuckles while snapping his fingers. Before I know it, I was falling through the endless pit of his portal. I swear when I see Dad again I'll hit him with a baseball bat. I flailed around until I land face down on my mattress with a loud Oomphf.

"I swear Dad!" I shout at the ceiling. "You're going to get it when you get home!"

I hear laughter behind me. "Look at my fallen angel"

I huff while rolling to my back. "Just for that, we're not going to have s*x"

"Hey" Miguel climbs on top of me with a frown. "I was the one who was with you while you were sad! Is this how you reward me?"

This nerd. I scoff "So you only did it for the reward?"

He shakes his head playfully "No, I did it because I love you very much"

Tell him Deima softly says which shocked me. Since when did Deima ever have that kind of tone for me? Tell him already.

As shock as I am from her softness, she was right. I have to tell Miguel that I have to stay now and that I can't ever leave until I do this. I push Miguel up while I sit on the edge of the bed. I breathe in deeply. Gosh, I really don't want to do this.

"Hey, are you okay?" he wraps his arms around my waist while pulling my back to his chest. He puts his chin on my shoulder while sneakily kissing my nape. "You're so stressed here. I can't wait for us to go home and you can finally relax."

Guilt stabs me through my chest. Deciding that I really do have to tell it to him, I push his arms away to stand on my feet. "Miguel, I have to tell you something"

"Uh-oh, I don't like the sound of that" he looks at me with a worried gaze. "What is it?"

God, the way he is looking at me right now. My heart is aching just at the thought of having to tell him and knowing how he'd react. I wipe my now clammy hands on my jeans while I smile at him. I tried to smile to lighten up the mood but it doesn't seem to work as he just looks the same.

I sigh "Miguel, I have to stay here"

"Why? You hate it here"

"Something happened in the wedding"

"What? What happened? Since when do you keep secrets from me?"

"Miguel, I just didn't know how to tell you that I have to stay here."

"Okay...until?"

"Indefinitely" I suddenly couldn't read the emotion in his eyes anymore. I don't know what he's truly feeling about the predicament we're in which makes me nervous. Miguel has always been insecure about the fact that I have a soulmate out there.

I keep reassuring him that Frier doesn't want me and that he rejected me which is a big thing in the werewolf world, but Miguel is a romantic at heart. He once told me how amazing it was that I'll know who my soulmate when I meet them but that was when I haven't told him everything. He just knew that I was a werewolf at the time.

"Please" I finally say, "Say something"

He looks away then sighs as if he's carrying the weight of the world. It even made him sound archaic. "Why do you need to stay?"

"Back at the wedding, Dad tried to hurt Frier which my wolf and vampire didn't like. They retaliated by trying to kill me" worry flashed his eyes, but it quickly goes away, he seems deep in thought.

"If I have to go back alone, and you have to stay here with him so close by then I think it's better that we... we stop this" his voice was low and raspy.

"W-What?" my heart starts aching in my chest. "Miguel I—"

I'm cut off short when he looks at me, he's crying. I see the anguish in pain and I thought I was looking at my reflection because I feel the same. My insides start to shake "We don't have to do this" I choke out, my tears burning my skin.

"Mirage, you were never mine" he whispers, he pulls my hand and puts it on his cheek. He nuzzles it and kisses my palm "No matter how hard I wish or no matter how hard I try, I'll never be someone who was meant and made for you"

I sob "Please, Miguel, I love you"

"I love you too but what is my love against a soulmate? How can I compare?"

"You're more than him"

"The only difference I have with him is that I'm here. if given the chance, I know you'll fall for him in a heartbeat because...that's how mates are"

"I choose you" I step closer to him. I put my other hand on his cheek. "I'll always choose you"

"Then you'll die. Eros and Deima would kill you for choosing me and I love you so much that I'd rather end this than see you die" he takes my hands away. He stands and brushes past me.

"What are you doing?" I whisper, my heart breaking into ash. I wonder how many times do your heart have to break before it would just finally give up?

"Packing, I'm going home and taking the next flight" he takes his suitcase on the corner of my room. We really didn't have a chance to take his things out between me being sad and Frier giving me another job.

"Miguel, please don't leave me" I beg, I know it seems stupid to beg for someone, but I truly do love him. He was the only one outside of my family and close friend to ever make me happy.

He freezes and turns to me. his face marred with his own sadness. "I don't want to, but I really have to"

"Don't go" I feel the energy being sapped out of me, it takes so much energy to carry a breaking heart. I just sit on the edge of the bed, begging Miguel with my eyes for him to stay. "I would never be happy with Frier"

"But he's what you need" he slams his bag close "I have to go"

"Miguel! On my 21stbirthday, I'm going to get rid of Eros!" I shout after him. not knowing what else to say to make him stay. I just want him to stay and talk to me.

He stops by the open-door way, he turns with a confused look on his face. "What?"

"We have made a deal with a witch that on my 21stbirthday, I'll be letting go of Eros because Deima is more manageable and I won't have to die"

"Excuse me" the new voice inside the house chilled me to the bone. My spine tingling as the door is pulled open even more. Miguel steps back, surprised at the newcomer. We didn't even know that we're not alone. "What is this deal?"