Trusting My First Love

Chapter 20: Making plans

Charlie's POV

And...... It's already beginning. Eddie and Matt are fighting. Well, they're not physically fighting, but Eddie made it clear that he's upset, and nothing has even happened yet. In this moment, I kind of hate how right my mother is. Keeping things as only friends has already complicated things so much. I don't even want to think about how things would be now if things had gotten further.

Keeping things very simple is the best thing I can do for everyone. I don't want to lead anyone on or get caught up on someone who isn't my mate. I don't like conflict, and my life lately has been a whole lot of that. Maybe agreeing to be "just friends" with Matt was just as bad as agreeing to be something more. What's crazy is that the thought even crossed my mind. I barely know the guy, yet here i am having thoughts about what it would be like to be with him. Is this a teenage thing or a werewolf thing? Either way, it probably means im slightly insane.

The rest of the class was awkward and quiet. No one dared to say anything, but it didn't stop the countless glares i was getting. Eddie and Matt's little show made it far worse than the glares of me just walking into class late with Matt.

I had my belongings packed up before the dismissal bell even rang. I was hoping to bolt before Matt or anyone else could catch up to me. I know Braya had questions. I could feel her burning holes into the side of my head during the whole class. I just loved that she knew me well enough that right now wasn't the right time. I just knew i would have to explain things to her later on today. I just needed to get through school.

I was the first one out the door. Which is exactly what i was hoping would happen. For once, i felt like my plan was on point. Accept that it wasn't. I heard his quickened steps behind me. I knew it wasn't Braya because she knew better than to ask for all the details at school. My gut was right because I felt a sudden pull on my arm, and before i could even speak to tell him to back off, i was pulled into the janitors closet.

The room was dark, and it took everything i had not to laugh as he fumbled around the small space to find the light switch. I didn't need him to think that all of this was fine, and laughing would definitely make things even more confusing.

He finally found the light switch after a few choice swear words. His face looked panicked once again. It instantly pulled on my heart strings and made me feel..... well, guitly. Guilty for even being frustrated with him and the whole situation in the first place. It's not his fault that Eddie reacted the way that he did. He doesn't control other peoples feelings or how they respond to them.

I reached out my hand to rub his shoulder. Let me just say it was a big, BIG mistake. He touched the top of where my hand was resting, and i swear i felt a sudden spark. For a second, i thought that maybe i was just paranoid, or maybe i was just imagining it. But when i looked up and our eyes met, i knew he felt it too. I wanted to play it off like it was nothing because maybe he just accidently shocked me. It happens. This could have been just that. It's all science related.

I pulled my hand away suddenly. It's probably way too late of a reaction. I just didn't know what else to do. I took a step back but was immediately hitting a shelf. There was nowhere for me to go. He was blocking the door, and this room was way too small for the both of us. The closness was making things too hazy for me right now. I needed space and time, and i thought i was clear about that before.

My voice was coming out with quite a bit of irratation. I just didn't know how else to sound because i was irratated. "Matt, what are we doing in here?"

He looked away for a second like he was gathering his thoughts before looking back with all seriousness. "I'm sorry. I embarrassed you back in class. Truth is, Eddie likes you, and I think he has for a while.....I'm not sure if he's ever told you or if you've ever noticed, but he does. I wanted to do the right thing. I wanted to be the good guy like Eddie always is. But I'm not. I've been with my share of girls. I've taken advantage of being the future alpha occasionally. I tried being in realtionships. I just never thought they were ever right. I know i've hurt my share of people. I know that, okay?.... Out of all people, i didn't want to hurt him. I didn't want to lie. I want him to know the truth. I will talk to him more about all of this later on... I'm just sorry that there was drama, and we made a scene. I know you already have your doubts, but please, please dont let this wreck any chance of us getting to know each other and becoming friends."

He rambled it all out so fast that it was hard to keep up, but one thing for certain was that he was sincere. He was being honest and vulnerable. In the last few days, i've been seeing a different side to him. A side that I didn't know he had. It's surprising and confusing, but worst of all, intriguing. He was pulling me, and he didn't even know it.

The way he was looking at me with those big stupid eyes, I knew he was about to crumble if i didn't say something soon. "It's okay, Matt. We can still get to know each other. Everything is fine."

He let out a large breath and clossed his eyes. I gave him relief, and it felt good knowing i was the cause of that. He slowly started nodding his head. "Good, that's good... I'm trying Charlie. I just want you to know that I'm trying to be better."

My instincts took over, and I felt like i was running on nothing but my impulses. I cupped his cheek with my hand. Everything in me wanted to comfort him, and i had no logical reason as to why i should. "Matt, it's okay. I see that, and I've heard everything you've said. Why dont we talk later about this and not at school?"

He started to nod eagerly. "Yes, that would be great. Do you want to ride home with me from school? That way, you can just walk to your house afterward so your mom doesn't know we're hanging? I don't want to cause more problems for you."

I nodded back. "That should be fine. I'll let Braya know my plans."

He reached for the door handle, and i was the one to stop him this time. "Why dont you go out first, and I'll go out a few minutes after. I dont want anyone to get the wrong idea about what happened in here."

He let out a small chuckle that gave me butterflies. "You realize multiple people saw me pull you in here. You know how this school is. I'm sure it's all already made its rounds. So, I'm sorry about that too. I can't help the attention that comes my way."

I frowned for a second. It wasn't because i can't handle it because i can. I just always get myself into trouble with how i react. Let's just say my fist sometimes has a mind of its own. Especially with a couple of blonde bimbos.

I sighed quietly. "It's all good, Matt. I'll try to keep my temper in control, okay? It's just been a long day, so i make no promises."

His grin said it all. "I wouldn't expect anything less from you. I'm honestly shocked you didn't swing a punch at me for dragging you in here. You really do need to work on that temper of yours."

I rolled my eyes. I wasn't sure if he was being serious or not. I think he was just trying to lighten the mood a bit. "It's been a long day. Let's just say I'm saving it for the ones that truly deserve it."

"Just be careful. I'll see you after school, Charlie."

I smiled and nodded. I could tell he really didn't like the idea of me getting into a fight. "After school."

As soon as he left the closet, I let myself relax against the shelf. It was like all my senses were coming back to me. I couldn't help but wonder if i was fool for agreeing to hang with him after school. Let's face it, I'm setting myself up to get into so much trouble.