Hel's Huntsman

19 - Too late

Hel

“I already know all of this, Lucifer.” I sigh while sitting on my throne. “You’re not telling me anything new.”

Lucifer groans and scrubs his hands over his face. “You know about the prophecy, yet you won’t do anything to prevent it!” He walks closer. “Are you not understanding what will happen if you have a child?”

I’m sick of going over this with him. I know about the damn prophecy because Loki told me before I fell into Revival Sleep. That’s why the man kept following me around or asking others to get me to speak with him. I heard him inside my head as I fought the effects of Revival Sleep. I listened without speaking. I did because I wasn’t interested in what he had to say. What he told me felt like a lie. Honestly, I thought Loki was lying to me because it wouldn’t have been the first time. As I fell asleep, I heard Loki whisper, ‘They will come for him.’

Now, here Lucifer is, telling me the same thing, and I don’t know what to say. So, my son will be all-powerful. So much so that Odin will want him dead, while others will want to use him for said powers. Kaiden could also end the world as we know it, just as Odin feared Fenrir would.

All anyone is focused on is what might happen. No one cares to think about the other side of things. Like all the good my son might do.

I should have spoken to Kayson about this before we mated. But in all honesty, I didn’t even think about it until Lucifer brought it up today. In my dreams, I see Kaiden as a good man who helps others. Yes, I saw his powers, but they were not used for evil.

However, I know that means nothing. If Odin gets his hands on my son, he’ll be killed. If someone else does, they will twist his mind into something unrecognizable. They will turn my son into a killing machine until the day he loses control and destroys the world. Millions will die because of my son, and there will be nothing Kayson and I can do to prevent it.

The best thing to do would be not to have a child. All of this bullshit would go away, and Kayson and I could live a happy, quiet life. But it hurts to think that I’m not allowed to be happy. Of course, just being with Kayson makes me happy. But I’m talking about never having a family of my own.

Why can my brothers have it all, but I can’t?

Why wasn’t Fenrir’s son the one with all the power?

Fenrir was the one Odin feared the most, after all. Yet Odin did not come for Fenrir’s son. Probably because the curse didn’t pass to Fenrir’s son; it’s my son who won that lottery. This hurts so much! I am thousands of years old, yet I feel like a whiny child, complaining that I can’t have what the other kids can.

But am I so wrong to want the life I was promised?

The easy thing to do would be to agree and never have a child. I could prevent it if I genuinely wanted to. I could explain all of this to Kayson and make him understand it would be for the best. My mate would understand because that’s the kind of man he is. However, I also know it will hurt him to know we could never become parents.

Nothing has ever hurt me as much as this. I have had some terrible times in my life, times I wished I could die and release myself from the misery. But then, Selene gave me hope when she showed me a vision of my future with Kayson. Hope filled me, and I strived to reach my goal of being with the man I loved. Knowing there was a child in our future made everything perfect, especially when I never imagined in my wildest dreams I would become a mother. Now, it’s all come crashing down around me.

What am I supposed to do?

Is there really no way I could protect my son?

“Hel, are you even listening to me?”

I roll my eyes. “I heard you, Lucifer. What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to be smart, Hel. Look,” Lucifer sighs while kneeling in front of me, which inwardly makes me laugh because he swore that he would never kneel before me. “I know this is hurtful. You, above anyone, deserve to be a mother. But think about what it would mean to the universe if not the world. Your son could destroy us all. Is that what you want?”

“Of course, that’s not what I want!” I yell loudly enough to shake the ground. It doesn’t bother Lucifer; my anger never does. “You think I want to watch my son grow into a man who will destroy the world? That I want Odin to kill him? That I want him taken from me by forces that will twist his mind? Because I don’t, Lucifer! What I want is a happy, healthy child who is able to live in peace. But I can’t have that, can I? No, I can’t have what the rest of you have because the Gods forbid, I can have just one damn thing that is mine!”

Lucifer holds his hands up in surrender. “Calm down.”

“Calm down? You have a nerve! It’s alright for you. You’ve got your children. No one is asking you to kill one of them!”

“No one is asking you to kill your child, Hel. He hasn’t even been created yet!”

I roll my eyes.

Lucifer has no idea how this feels. His children are alive and well and have families of their own. No one is going to take Lucifer’s children from him.

Sure, he’s worried about the world and its inhabitants. But I don’t give a fuc.k about that! I am so sick of being the one who has to fight for everything in life. Nothing has ever been easy for me, and I was okay with that until Kayson came into my life. All I want is peace. I want to live with my mate and our child without anyone coming for us with the intention of taking my family from me.

I don’t know how I’ll be able to stop the inevitable from happening. But I like to think I would teach my son about his powers and how to handle them. I would teach him about the dangers out there, and I would die to protect him.

But therein lies the problem. In protecting my son, I will die. Kayson will die because he will fight for me, and I’m not even sure my own son would not be the one to kill us, as the prophecy states.

With so many people knowing what the future could hold, they would twist my son’s mind, and he would turn against his parents. Once Kayson and I were dead, my son would destroy the world because we are the only ones who could stop Kaiden from becoming what everyone fears he will.

But I refuse to believe I would be that terrible of a mother that my son would turn into a monster on my watch. I hope with love and guidance, Kaiden would be a good man. I know I have the ability to show my son right from wrong. I have been alive long enough to know that no one is perfect.

There is no such thing as a perfect parent or child. But there is a difference between guidance, standing back, and allowing that child too much freedom. I would never stifle the person Kaiden was, but I would make sure he knew that doing the wrong thing, even for the right reason, would not fly.

For the sake of the world’s future, the best thing would be not having a child. Just being with Kayson is enough because he is my everything. That man showed me more love than I knew existed. I don’t deserve it, but it’s mine.

But on the other hand, the thought of not giving life to the child I have dreamed about for years hurts so much. Nothing has ever hurt like this.

I never had love from my parents. I didn’t even know what love was until Selene showed me that vision of Kayson and Kaiden. I knew I was lost when I saw Kayson kiss me in that vision. Then I saw my son and everything inside of me changed. There was nothing I wouldn’t do to make that vision a reality.

But now, I have an uncountable amount of people wanting to kill a child who hasn’t even been born yet. Not to mention Odin. I don’t care about anyone else; I can handle anyone who comes for my son. But Odin is another story altogether. He is whom I fear and what he will do to get his hands on Kaiden. Odin won’t just kill Kaiden; he will torture him and use him for his own gain before taking his life.

However, if Odin is so scared of what Kaiden will become, then he won’t wait for my son to grow up before ending his life. If Kaiden’s powers are to be greater than Odin’s, I fear he will attack before I even give birth.

There has to be a way for me to hide my son. There just has to be!

“Listen to me, Hel.”

“I don’t want to listen to you, Lucifer!”

“Tough!” He yells with conviction. “You are the Goddess of the Dead. You know what death feels like. Do you really want to go through that on a personal level? Because that’s what will happen if you create that boy.”

I look Lucifer dead in the eye and smirk. “Too late.”

Lucifer’s face drops because he knows exactly what I’m saying. “What have you done?”