1 - It never gets easier
Kayson
From my perch on a high branch in a tall tree, I watch him search for me. As big as I am, I’m a master of hiding from any foe. They won’t find me in the forest; this place is my playground. I know the woods like the back of my hand. I can navigate the forest with my eyes closed, and no one has found me since I was nine years old. I was taught by the best – my father.
The key is to move like a silent predator and attack like a beast. The man tracking me is good. He’s stealthy and moves almost silently. Pity for him, I’m better.
He moves past my tree with a bow and arrow in his hand. I close my eyes and listen closely. I hear the rustling of small wildlife animals as they scurry across the ground, the sounds of bird song and wind as they blow through the trees, and the sound of the young man’s heart as it beats steadily.
I smirk while opening my eyes and pulling back the arrow in my bow. I keep both eyes open while aiming at the guy. I notice the man’s ear twitch, listening for any noise out of the ordinary. I stay silent and still, not making one movement. I don’t make a sound and wait until the last possible moment to strike.
Why?
If your prey thinks they’re safe enough to escape, they will always drop their guard, even if only for a second. That one second could save your life.
I let the arrow go, watching it spin and whiz through the air. The guy turns just in time for the arrow to fly past his ear, barely missing him and hitting a tree just as I intended. Trust me, if I had wanted to hit him, he’d be dead now.
I chuckle, jump down from my hiding spot, and land on my feet.
“How the hell did you do that?”
I slip my bow behind the quiver at my back and shrug. “You’ve either got it or you don’t, Viggo.”
My nephew groans. “I’ll get you one of these days.”
“I doubt it,” I laugh when he rolls his eyes.
I have a close relationship with Viggo. We like a lot of the same things, and I’ve been teaching him to hunt for over five years. Whenever my sister Winter comes home to visit, Viggo follows me into the woods to hunt for meat for the pack. He’s learned a lot over the years. His mind is like a sponge, and he takes direction well. Spending time with my nephew like this takes my mind off Hel, even if for a short while.
“Let’s get back before your mom sends out a search party.”
“She would too.” Viggo shudders.
I chuckle all the way back. Viggo and I weren’t hunting anything other than each other today, so we have no prey to bring with us. I’ve been having some pretty dark thoughts of late, and I needed to think of something other than killing everything in sight.
We check in with our family to let them know we’ve returned. If we don’t, our mothers would worry. Having my mother worry is bad enough, but it's chaos when Winter gets in on the action. I still need air, so I sit on the steps outside my cabin. I had thought Viggo would go to my parent’s cabin, but he followed me.
“When do you think I’ll get a mate?”
“Don’t let your mother hear you asking things like that.” I bump shoulders with my nephew. “You’re ten, Viggo. If you had a mate right now, everyone would die of shock. It would be weird.”
Viggo shrugs. “Technically, I’m ten. But I look, think, and act like a twenty-five-year-old. For the love of Odin, I look your age!”
I nod because he’s right. Viggo does look my age. He’s not as built as me, but most men aren’t. I feel for Viggo, though. Being the firstborn son of Fenrir, Viggo aged twice as fast as regular children. Fuc.k, sometimes it seemed he was growing three times as fast!
Viggo barely had a childhood due to his accelerated growth. Not only did his body grow rapidly, but his mind matured just as fast.
Viggo’s younger brother, Finn, also grew twice as fast as most kids. But he suddenly stopped when he reached the age of four. Now Finn looks like every other nine-year-old. Viggo’s only sister, Melody, is now six and aged as she should, much to my sister’s joy. Then came Rune and Raidar, twin boys aged three, also growing normally.
Winter’s pregnancies were always short, Viggo just five days, Finn two weeks, though with Melody, it was three weeks, and the twins came along at six weeks' gestation. Fenrir said it had something to do with Viggo being the Alpha child, Finn the Beta, and so on.
“I’m not sure how it will work for you, Viggo. Grandmother Selene might not have a problem giving you a mate in the not-so-distant future. You are a man, after all, regardless of when you were born. But I’m sure your dad will have a problem with it, and your mom definitely will.”
Viggo chuckles. “Yeah, she will. I know, technically, I’m ten, but here,” He waves his hand over his big body. “And here,” He taps his temple. “I’m a grown man. I’m not saying I want a mate right now, but I wish my mom would stop treating me like a kid. You know?”
I nod. “It’s hard for Winter to let go. But your mom loves you, Viggo, more than you’ll ever know. Winter is overprotective. She takes after my mom for that. I am actually twenty-five, and Starr still treats me like a little boy.”
“Yeah.” Viggo chuckles again. “It must run in the family.”
“It doesn’t matter how old we get, Viggo. Our mothers will always treat us like little boys. They love us and don’t want us to grow up and find mates because they think that means losing us. It means no such thing, but mothers are strange. As irritating as it can be, we’d miss it if they were gone.”
I know I would, which is why I don’t stop my mom smothering me. Well, to a degree, at least.
“When do you think Hel will come for you?”
I close my eyes and shrug while leaning my elbows on my knees. “I don’t know, Viggo. I’m not holding my breath that it will be any time soon.”
“What will you do when you see her again?”
“Slam her against the nearest tree and fu… Say hello.”
Viggo bursts out laughing, and I can’t help smiling. Winter would kill me if I swore or said anything sexua.l in front of her precious son. Another reason Viggo believes his mother babies him.
‘Are you really going to slam Hel against a tree and fuc.k her?’ My Lycan asks.
‘I don’t know what I’ll do, Adder. But I have a deep need to be buried inside of her. Though I don’t think attacking her the moment I see her will make Hel very happy.’
My Lycan snickers. ‘My friend, I have a feeling you are incorrect.’
‘We’ll see.’
When we’ll see, I do not know.
“Melody?” Viggo grabs his little sister’s attention. She’s outside, walking toward my cabin, alone and crying.
My cabin is further back from my parent’s home, and Melody shouldn’t be wandering this way. Her mom would have a heart attack. But for Melody to be all the way over here, she’s looking for someone.
Melody turns and sees Viggo on my doorstep. She runs toward us, lifting her arms as she goes. “Viggo!”
Viggo lifts his sister onto his lap. “What’s wrong, princess? Why are you crying?”
“Daddy left me!”
I shake my head and smile. It’s always the same with Melody. If Fenrir has to leave for a while, Melody has a breakdown. She hates being away from her father.
“Daddy didn’t leave you, Melody, and you shouldn’t be out here alone. Anything could happen to you.”
“But I woke up from my nap, and he was gone! He didn’t say goodbye to me, Viggo. My heart hurts.” She lowers her blue eyes.
Melody is a beautiful little girl who looks just like her mother. I look at her sometimes and remember the little girl my sister once was. Winter is three years older than I am, but I still remember what she looked like at six.
Viggo clasps the back of her head, pulling her against his chest. “You know Daddy would never leave you without saying goodbye, Melody.”
“But I can’t find him,” She mumbles as Viggo kisses her head. “I need my daddy, Viggo.”
I roll my eyes as Fenrir comes around the corner, looking for his daughter, no doubt. I knew he wouldn’t be far behind. If Melody had just woken up from a nap and hadn’t seen her father, he must have either been with my grandfather, which isn’t unusual, or in the forest.
“I had a bad dream, Viggo. It made me scared, and then Daddy was gone. I need my daddy to hug me and make me not scared.”
“Do you mean that daddy?” Viggo points to Fenrir.
Melody’s head shoots up. “My daddy!” She jumps off Viggo’s lap and into Fenrir’s arms. “I missed you, Daddy.”
“I’m sorry, my princess. Daddy was with Uncle Kailus. But I’m here now.”
I wasn’t aware Kailus had returned. My eldest brother had been visiting our other brother, Cree. Kailus had taken his mate and three kids with him. We don’t see Cree often because he lives with his mates, Aether and Narfi, in a Realm Narfi created for them. As Kailus, Cree, and Winter are triplets, the three need to be together every few months. They miss each other if they don’t, which is normal. I used to be the same way with them. But without Hel, I’m losing interest in everything and everyone.
‘You and I need to talk.’ Fenrir’s voice fills my head.
‘About?’
‘Hel.’
‘What about her?’
Fenrir hasn’t spoken to me about Hel in years. I stopped bringing her up because he would tell me the same thing – she’ll be back soon. But soon is never soon enough.
‘Let me sort Melody, and I’ll come talk to you.’
I watch as Fenrir leads Melody and Viggo away from me. I breathe in the fresh air that surrounds me. Living at the forest's edge and surrounded by nature is like nothing else in this world. I love visiting my family in Lykos; though there is a forest, I couldn’t live in a big city. I couldn’t even live in a small town. I love my life here, which makes me wonder how I’ll manage living in Niflheim with Hel. I would go anywhere with my mate because she is my home, but I love the wild. I don’t know who I’d be without it.
I enter my cabin with a sigh. I look around my house and smile. It’s not a big cabin, but there are two bedrooms. I had the place built as soon as I turned eighteen. Not that Mom wanted me to move out, but I needed my own space. There’s a combined kitchen and living room, a separate bathroom, and, as aforementioned, two bedrooms. One bedroom is quite large, the other not so. The large bedroom was designed for Hel and me, and the other was for our son.
Goddess, I still can’t believe there’s a son in my future. When Hel told me what she’d seen, I didn’t doubt her one little bit. I have loved someone who doesn't exist since Hel told me about him. I told my parents about Kaiden, as Hel called him. I told my mom that I felt stupid for loving him when he hadn't even been created. Mom smiled and said it was perfectly normal because I knew he would one day be with me. I don’t know when Kaiden will come along in the future, but I’m beginning to lose hope that it will ever happen. The longer I’m without my mate, the further into darkness I slip. I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this.
“This is weird, you know?”
I roll my eyes before turning to face Fenrir. I’m not surprised he slipped in without me hearing him. He’s never been known to knock on the door and wait to be invited in.
Who cares if a man is naked?!
“What’s weird about my house?”
Fenrir moves to the large, framed pencil drawing of Hel that sits proudly above my open fire. “This. If it's not bad enough that you tattooed her name and face on your chest, you have all of this. Gods, Kayson, how many pictures have you drawn and painted of my sister?”
“Hundreds.” I shrug while folding my arms over my chest. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve drawn Hel.
“I must admit you’re a decent portrait artist. But still,” He looks away from the picture. “It’s weird. Anybody would think you’re obsessed.”
I am far beyond obsessed with my mate. I draw her image because I can’t get her out of my head. No two pictures are ever the same. I’ve drawn her in many poses and various states of happiness because her smile is printed on my memory for all eternity. I drew her from the first time I met her to the last time I saw her and everything my imagination could conjure in between. I had my grandfather tattoo a portrait I drew of Hel onto my chest because she was close to my heart that way.
“Just get to the point, Fenrir. What do you want to talk to me about?”
He nods. “Fine. My sister is waking.”
My eyes widen as I stand straighter. “You can feel her?”
“I can.”
I take a shuddering breath and wipe my hand over my face.
‘She’s waking up, Kayson!’
‘I know, Adder. My heart is pounding.’
‘I can feel it!’
“It’s time we left for Niflheim, Kayson. Hel isn’t fully awake, but I believe if she hears your voice, it will wake her and bring her back to you.”
“When do we leave?”
“Right now.”
Within the hour, all being well, Hel will be in my arms where she belongs.
Nothing will go wrong.
Right?