Never free
1273 Words
" Phina, I love you." He stared at me, brows furrowed in anger.
" Do not kill my family, I will never ask you or tell you my true yearning for them ever again. Please Manuel, promise me you won't hurt them." I hugged myself and cried.
" I can't promise you this, if they come for you...I will have no choice."
" Manuel, I could help you become a true business man, an honest investor and land owner. I can free you of this life of crime. I could be your true wife.
The circles we would be able to network in. I could change you Manuel. A true man of honor...if you want that life."
He stared at me as if he just saw me for the first time.
" Would you stay with me then, if I was a person like that, love me?"
" If I was your wife and you made a commitment to me to forsake all others, yes I promise you now that I would be your true love, not a slave...an equal."
He kissed me then. His lips lingered over my neck, then lower.
" I own you now. Why do I need an equal. I am your God." He roughly grabbed my breast and squeezed me.
I got quiet then, seeing he needed this power, this control.
" Can I ask you something?" I dared speak.
He nodded.
" What did you pay for me, why me?"
I did not expect an answer.
" Five thousand US equivalent dollars. I chose you because you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen at an auction, I had to buy you."
" Thank you husband, for saving me from those men. The things they did to me... I wanted to kill them all. I would have paid five hundred thousand to kill each one of them."
Manuel pulled me into his arms. He liked to see himself as my savior. I played into his ego.
I realized he didn't want a smart wife. He wanted to be adored and loved only on his terms.
" I have some papers I want you to go over with me, I am expanding my land holdings. Let's see how you can make your husband respectable then."
I smiled at him with joy nodded, it was a start.
He laughed. I very rarely heard him laugh. It was a nice change.
I looked away. He lifted my chin to look at me.
" I forsake all others wife. I can't set you free yet, but I will entertain your words."
" Manuel, I will never ask you to free me again, ever if my family is safeguarded.
I'm sorry, I know it's not my place to ask for this."
I feared the sting of his rejection.
I stood to get dressed.
He pulled me back to bed.
" I will think about this too, if you are mine and promise to never leave, I will safeguard your family."
I nodded, " I promise you, as long as you keep your word. I will never leave you."
" Do you desire me to pleasure you now wife?"
" Am I still your slave?" My eyes darted away, filling with tears.
He pulled my face back to his.
" You know the answer."
" Then no, I only live for your pleasure, nothing for me, only you."
He disliked my words. If he had to make me love him, it was not true love.
He wanted me to love him on my own. I never could, never. I wondered if he knew this, or just didn't care to know.
The next day Ian entered my room.
He handed me a phone.
"Tonight, 11pm. Make a call and afterward, leave the phone under the big rock by the back door. You can send word to your family that you are alive. Do not tell them where you are or who you are with, promise me?"
I put the phone in my bathroom. My mind was filled with happiness, true happiness.
Manuel called me up to his office.
" Come, sit dear wife. OK these are the lands I am considering."
I looked at all of the properties.
"I need your computer, please."
He nodded. " Try anything and I will..."
" I know you will murder me where I stand, I know!" I got mad and threw my pen down and marched out.
" Fuck." I yelled as I went down to the beach.
Always killing me, always controlling me, always such a jerk.
I sat in the sand and looked up to the sky.
" I thought Lana was testing me before, but this is a much bigger test isn't it?" I said to the sky.
" Whose Lana?" Manuel was looming behind me now, thick arms crossed over his big chest.
" It's in my past. Not your concern." I kicked the sand and stayed quiet.
" Why did you leave like that?"
" Manuel, I can't help you. I can't. You want me dead, then f*****g kill me right now. My plans for us require trust.
I would never put my family in danger, why would I try to use your computer to set up the people I love more than anything else in this world to be killed by a monster like you?"
I suddenly realized I could never use that phone Ian gave me to call home, I would be putting them all in danger.
I did not care anymore. I decided right then to make him kill me. I would never love him, never.
" I am sorry that I threatened you again. Phina, I know you believe that I am a monster. I know you love them very much. I envy them.
I only want you happy. Please come back. You can use my computer. Come back with me now, this is an order or else..."
I faced him now. My hair whipped around my head as I shook my head.
" Kill me."
He took a step back. "Phina don't say that."
" I want you to trust me, but if you continue to threaten my life every time I do anything, I have no more joy in helping you. So just end me right now."
I ran out into the ocean then, I swam as far as I could. He threw off his shirt and ran after me, I quickly dove under the surf, away from his grasp.
I was leaving him, forcing his hand. He promised to end me if I left, well...I left.
I swam as far as I could, making it into the open water. My legs were tired and I floated on my back. The sun was burning my face, my body.
I had cracked.
Manuel came and got me, swimming me back with his arm around my shoulders.
He hauled me back in.
" Come on, you made your very dramatic point." He said.
"I'm finished being your pet."
" You will be punished for running from me, not death...but I must enact a punishment none the less, I'm sorry to have to hurt you.
My household is run by discipline. It must be so." Manuel dragged me back into his house, in front of everyone.
He stripped me down and tethered me, facing the wall.
" Seven lashes. I will warn you before each one. Please Phina, never run from me again."
He began to yell and make a show of his anger for the whole house to hear him.
" Brace yourself." He warned me.
- Writer
