Eight: Lucy Lark
2141 Words
Eight:
Lucy Lark
Going to the kitchen was more like going to the dungeon. I hadn’t talked to Gran since the announcement, and I had no idea what she would think about the whole thing. Gran was old fashioned. She thought that there should be distance between myself and the royals. But me, being American, had never seen what the fuss was about. Gran was a tall woman, with a bird like nose, and grey hair. The that I saw her, she was pulverizing a thing of meat into submission.
“Gran,” I said.
She stopped as I entered the kitchen. She put down what she was doing. Then, looked up at me, her eyes black as coal even though they were normally blue grey. “Lucy Amelia Lark,” she said, “what on earth were you thinkin’?”
I winced. “It’s not like I had a choice, Gran.”
“There’s always a choice. I told you not to befriend the Prince and the Princess, but you did anyway. Do you know the kind of nonsense that comes when you become friends with royals?”
“Gran, you work for them.”
“That’s different,” she said, “this is something that our family has done for generations. You have the chance to have something better. Now, you will live and die in this palace as your grandfather and I have.”
“But the royals----”
She stepped out from behind the island in the center of the kitchen. I could see tears welling up in her eyes. “You’ve already sacrificed so much for me, Lucy. Just by comin’ here. You’ve no idea how proud your Grandda was when he heard that you got into Harvard! Now, you’ve got to come here and help care for a silly, old fool. You shouldn’t have to give up everything else for me, too. I know how much Aiden hurt you over the years.”
I glanced around, hoping that there was no one listening. Sure enough, the kitchen was empty except for us. “Gran, I’m not doing this for Aiden. I’m doing it for you.”
With her hands on her hips, she scowled at me. “How is bein’ engaged to a Prince something for me?”
“Because,” I said, “Queen Nora said that if I agreed to Anam Cara you would get to live in the palace. Which would mean that you’ll have access to the royal doctors.”
Gran crossed her arms over her chest. “Lucy, we’ve got perfectly adequate insurance as palace employees….”
I reached out and took her hand in mine. “Perfectly adequate isn’t good enough, Gran. I want you to have the best. I’m your granddaughter. It’s two years of my life. What’s the worst that can happen?”
“You could not be allowed back in Ireland,” said Gran, “or…. you could fall for him.”
I shook my head. “I learned a long time ago not to think of Aiden as my future. I’m not going to have to worry about that. Let me do this. I’ll get to take care of you, and…. I don’t know. If live to be 80, at least I’ll have something interesting to tell.”
Gran narrowed her eyes. “You’re too good of a granddaughter for me. Live a little recklessly for me after this won’t you?”
“I’ll try,” I said. I smiled and gave her a hug.
She coughed then and gestured to the doorway behind me. I glanced over my shoulder to see Aiden standing there. No matter where he went, Aiden made for an imposing figure. His blue eyes were that stormy, grey color that happened when he was upset or unsure about something. “Lucy,” he growled out, “you’re here.”
“I told you I would be, didn’t I?”
He nodded. “You did.”
I walked towards him, the anger that I felt earlier returning. The only reason I wasn’t letting it out then was that my Gran was right there, and I didn’t want to upset her. “Come on. We should talk.”
He nodded. “Alright.”
I walked out of the kitchen, and he followed. I didn’t want us to be on display. Everyone in the palace knew I was the cook and the butler’s granddaughter. Everyone also knew that Aiden and I had gone back and forth for each other for years. Elsie McGrath, the head housekeeper, had an ongoing bet with the maids on when we’d get together. I didn’t need to give them anymore fuel for the imagination.
“Where should we go to talk?” he asked.
“The library,” I said, “no one uses it. No one will expect us to be there.”
“You use it,” he reminded me.
I blushed, slightly annoyed that he knew that about me. “That’s not the point. Come on, Shamrock.” I took him by the hand, calling him by the nickname that he absolutely loathed. Then I dragged him to the library, pulling him inside, and that was where I tossed a book at his arrogant head.
It landed with a thunk on his head. He hissed. “Fecking Christ! Lucy, what the fecking hell was that for?”
“I am not your prize, or your property. You cannot simply decide that I’m yours simply because you have some territorial need to keep me safe. I am not your little sister, Aiden, and if that’s why you’re doing this then you can just stop.”
His eyes narrowed. “You think I’m doing this to keep you safe?”
“Yes!” I said. “Because I know exactly how you are. You think you need to save everyone. I don’t need to be saved. I’m perfectly capable of saving myself.”
There was a shift in the air. Something that I couldn’t explain. He towered over me. Never, in my life, had I felt so small or so at the mercy of someone else. I could feel his breath on me. I’d seen Aiden angry at other people. But I had never imagined that he would ever get angry at me.
He said nothing, only hovered over me. I was reminded of all those times before when he had tried to kiss me. I’d spent years running, fearing that I would cost my Grandda and my Gran their jobs. But now, Aiden had declared Anam Cara. I had permission to kiss him. In fact, it was encouraged.
We’d already kissed once. When he first staked his claim. But that was different. Done in a moment of bravado. This was intentional. I could turn away any moment. I owed him nothing. Yet, I was frozen in place, pressed up against the bookshelf. He grabbed my wrists and pinned me up against the wall.
“I’m not doin’ this because I’m tryin’ to keep you safe, Lucy. I’m doin’ this so that ye don’t fly away. Do you understand?”
“I----”
He reached out and stroked my lips with one of his fingers. His other hand still pressing one of my wrists up against the bookshelf. “I spent years watchin’ you leave. Every summer, you’d come. Then, every fall you’d go away. You were the only constant in my life my whole childhood. And my teens. I don’t want you goin’ away anymore. Do you understand?”
My mouth went dry. I nodded. “Uh-huh.”
“Anam Cara. Mo shiorghra. A cheadsearc.” He whispered Irish nothings in my ear. “Tri na cheile a thogtar na caisleain.”
I had learned little Irish over the years of my staying there. I knew Anam Cara. I knew from context that Mo shiorghra and A cheadsearc were terms of endearment. Something like my love and my one and only. But I didn’t know the language well enough to know the last bit. “Aiden….” I whispered.
“Lucy,” he whispered back.
Then, before I could stop him, he kissed me. Pressing me up against the bookshelf, his chest pressed against mine. He smelled like cologne. He ran his hands through my hair, then pulled me away from the bookshelf, over to the library’s couch. He straddled over me. Kissing first my neck, then my collar bone. His hands made their way to the bottom of my blouse. He started to unbutton. I grabbed his hand and pulled it away.
“No,” I said sharply.
“No?” his face fell.
I sat up, then buttoned my blouse again.
Aiden stared at me with surprise on his face. “You’re honestly walking away?”
“Yes,” I said, “because I am not letting you take the easy way out. I fall for your bullshit every time Aiden. I’m not lying back and thinking of Ireland.”
Aiden’s face split into a grin. “You know that’s not how things work in Ireland, right? That’s the British, darlin’. We’re not about layin’ back.”
I got up from the couch.
He grabbed my wrist. “Come on, Lucy. We’ve both wanted this for as long as I could remember.”
“We?” I shook my head. “Aiden, I spent years pining after you. You ignored me for most of that while you were bedding other girls. You even brought Penelope Peters over to court her. Then told me to date someone else.”
“Lucy, I was trying to----”
“Protect me,” I said, “I know. You’ve been doing nothing but try to protect me since I was eleven years old and you saw Mallory strung up a tree. But protecting me is not the same as loving me. Protecting me won’t bring Mallory back from the dead, Aiden.”
He scowled. “You think I’m protecting you because I couldn’t protect my sister?”
“I know it!” I exclaimed. “And I’m sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t save her. I was eleven, and stupid, and scared. I had a knife pressed to my face. I couldn’t do anything. But I don’t need protecting. Or saving. If you want to love me, fine. But don’t force me to be with you because you’re scared.”
He scowled at me. “I’m not doing this because I’m scared of losing you the same way that I’m losing my sister.”
“Really? Then why am I in Mallory’s room?”
“This is how Anam Cara works,” he told me, “my mother went through the same thing.”
“Well, I’m not your mother.”
He frowned. “Fecking hell.” He ran his hand through his dark hair. “Please don’t ever compare yourself to my mother ever again. That’s not an image I need.”
“If you’re not trying to protect me, let me live on campus,” I said. “Don’t put me through Anam Cara. Court me like you would any other girl.”
He shook his head. “You’re not any other girl, Lucy. You’re the girl. The one I want, by my side, forever. No one can rule over me, but you can. Because you’re my Queen.”
I blushed. “Aiden….”
“That’s why I need to put you through Anam Cara, Lucy. Not because I’m trying to protect you. Because I’m trying to protect myself.”
“From what?” I whispered.
“From killing anyone that touches or looks at you,” he said, “because no one touches my Queen.”
I swallowed, hard. “Aiden…”
“I nearly killed my cousin when I heard that he wanted to date you. I breathed a sigh of relief when Marlowe fecking married Cecelia because that meant one less man to come after you.” He stroked my cheek gently, like it was the most precious thing in the world to him.
“But…. but….” I stammered.
He pressed his forehead against mine. “I’ll talk to mother about letting you stay on campus. It’s never been done before, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be done. You living in the palace…you saw how it was today. It’s to keep you from scrutiny. It might get messy. They’ll insinuate things, and the press can be vicious. If we’re livin’ in the castle, well----”
“And what, exactly, do you think is going to happen?” I asked.
He smirked. “I can think of one or two things.”
I blushed. “That’s not happening. I’m not sleeping with you.”
“Oh yes, we’re going to sleep together. Maybe not right now, but eventually, you and I are going to be together, Lucy. When we are, I’m going to devour you, and you will never think of another man’s name ever again.”
I pulled away from him. “I…. I have to go.”
“Go where?” he asked, knowing full well that I didn’t have to go anywhere.
“I have to go study.” I headed for the door.
He followed me.
“Study for what?” he said. “We’ve only had one day. Everyone knows that they don’t give homework on the first day.”
I turned to look at him. “Then, I have to go help Gran.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Then, I have to go because I want to go.” I walked out of the library, leaving him alone. Being around him was dangerous. I had always put Aiden off as an impossibility. Now that Anam Cara had been declared, all bets were off. And I didn’t know how long it would be before my clothes were too.
- Writer
