The Bad Girl's Gentleman

= Code 13 =

The Bad Girl's Gentleman

= Code 13 =

SUGAR DADDY = (ACCORDING TO STEFAN) A RICH OLD MAN WHO'D GIVE ANYTHING FOR A YOUNG GIRL WHO DOES HIM SERVICE.

"So, ano na nga? Turuan mo naman kami ng techniques mo," sabi ni Stefan habang kumakain kami sa isang ice cream parlor. "Paano ba ginagawa mo? Sinusubo mo ba ng buo?"

"Kadiri!" I say. Sobra akong nandiri na kinilabutan ako. Err. Eww. Ugh.

Natawa naman silang dalawa ni Via sa harapan ko. "Share your blessings, girl! Turuan mo kami!"

"Yuck, kadiri. Wala nga kaming ginagawa ni Baz. Nakakairita naman ah," sabi ko sa kanila. Paulit-ulit na kasi.

"So he gives you gifts for nothing?" tanong sa'kin ni Stefan na parang hindi naniniwala. "Ganyan ba talaga siya kabait?"

"Yes!" I stress with a roll of my eyes. "Gee, hindi naman lahat ng lalaki isa lang ang habol."

"Pero isa lang naman talaga," sabi ni Via. "Baka pinapainit ka lang ngayon."

I kick her under the table. "Stop it. Wala ngang gano'n!"

"Sooner or later, you'll see. He spent almost two hundred thousand on you, or more!"

Umirap ako. "Mayaman lang talaga siya."

"Kaya nga! Sugar daddy, di ba?"

"Hindi ko nga siya sugar daddy ang kulit. Five years lang agwat namin, what the hell?! Parang hindi mo nakasama si Baz sa fieldwork at interview ah?"

"Oh, whatever," says Via with a flick of her wrist. "Tignan mo nga, ang ganda-ganda ng bracelet mo."

"Mukha ba siyang sugar daddy? Pangit ba siya ha? Is he wrinkled, gray, and old?"

"Chill, girl," pagtawa ni Stefan. "Nang-aasar lang naman kasi kami. Ikaw naman... defensive masyado kay Baz. Iba na 'yan ah?"

Umirap siyang muli. "Whatever."

"So, ano? Nakauwi na ba 'yang pretty boy mo?"

Out of habit, I look at my phone. No new messages. "I don't even know if he's still alive."

"Text mo kaya? For sure, miss na miss mo na 'yan."

I roll my eyes. "Kahit hindi?"

Hindi naman kasi talaga. Nakakasanay na din kasi 'yung ganitong sistema ni Basil na hindi siya nagpaparamdam. Mabuti na nga iyong ganito at nang hindi talaga ako ma-obsess sa kaniya. Also, I find time for myself unlike doon sa mga tawag nang tawag. Nakakapag-aral ako ng payapa.

Siguro miss ko lang siya pero hindi 'yung sobra. Panigurado, kapag narinig ko na naman 'yung boses niya tsaka ko lang talaga siya mami-miss nang sobra. Parang hahampas na sa mukha ko 'yung emotions ko, mga gano'n ba?

That is exactly what happens when Baz calls on Tuesday mid-afternoon. Ang lakas ng kabog ng puso ko. Himala dahil wala pang isang linggo nakatawag na siya ulit sa'kin.

"Are you busy?" he asks.

"Hmm, not really," sagot ko sa kaniya habang naglalakad pabalik ng apartment. "Why?"

"Let's have dinner."

"Oh, so you're back? From outer space," pagkanta ko.

Natawa naman siya. "Yeah. Since yesterday, actually. I was swamped with work though."

"Ah."

"So, are you okay with dinner tonight?"

"Sure. What should I wear?"

He thinks for a while and I get the idea that he doesn't have a specific place to eat yet. "A dress or skirt would do."

"Okay."

All the remaining time I devote to looking for something to wear. Sana nasa bahay na lang ako dahil mas marami akong options do'n. Kahit nga damitan ni Via kinalikot ko na pero wala akong makitang damit na nagsasabing "Baz's Girlfriend". Damn, this is hard. I have to go shopping. Ano bang damit gusto ng lalaking 'yun?

In the end, I settle for a white off-shoulder dress. I look modest. Modest enough. I really don't like makeup so I just put some powder on my face and some lip gloss so I won't look pale. I also spread some color on my cheeks.

No sooner than later, my phone rings and I run to the elevator. When I meet Baz on the driveway, I pull him inside the circle of my arms. I carefully kiss his cheek so I don't put some of my lip gloss on him. "Hi."

"Hey," he greets on my ear before pulling away. "You look nice."

I raise an eyebrow at him. "Nice? Lang?"

"Baby, you can get all the compliments you want later. Get inside. I'm starving."

Surprisingly, sa Sunnyside ako dinala ni Baz. There is a line of restaurants outside and that is where we head. It has a fancy name written in a complicated script. I read something Germany in one of the stands of the menu.

Apparently, Baz made a reservation and the lady tells us to wait for a couple of minutes while they put the finishing touches. Madaming tao. At sa dami ng tao na 'yun hindi ko akalaing may makakakilala sa boyfriend ko.

"Basil?"

Sabay kaming napatalikod ni Baz sa nagsalita. Sa isang grupo lang naman ng lalaki tumama ang mga mata ko dahil sila lang ang nakatingin sa'min. One of them, a guy who has spiky hair is first to stand up and shake hands with Baz.

"How are you, man? It's been too long since we last saw you," sabi nito at lumipad ang mata sa'kin. Sa pagtingin niya palang mula ulo ko hanggang paa hindi ko na siya gusto. FYI lang ah, ang liit niya para sa'kin. Ngayong naka-heels ako magkasing tangkad lang kami ng kumag na 'to. "And you are...?"

"Gwen," sabi ko sa kaniya. Hindi ko alam kung dudugtungan ko ba ang pagpapakilala ko kaya napatingin ako kay Baz. Ano bang gusto niyang sabihin sa mga kaibigan niya?

His arm snaked around my waist and pulls me closer to him. "She's my girlfriend."

I ignore the slight fluttering of butterflies in my stomach.

Nanlaki naman ang mata ng lalaki. Napatingin siya sa'kin tapos kay Baz tapos sa mga lalaking kasama niya pa. "Wow," lang ang lumabas sa bibig nito. Do I look that young? Maybe I do. At inggit lang siya dahil ang sexy na katulad ko never magkakagusto sa kaniya. Ha! "But it seems like I've seen you somewhere."

Napataas ang kilay ko. "I don't think we ever met."

"Hmm," sabi nito at humawak pa sa baba niya na parang nag-iisip. "Maybe. But I definitely saw you already."

I force a smile at him. I squeeze Baz's forearm to get his attention. "I have to use the restroom. I'll see you inside."

Hindi na ko nagpaalam sa lalaki. Baka mamaya maalala niya pa kung sino ako. Wait, nakaharutan ko na ba siya sa The Vibe? O baka naman sa ibang bar? Pero hindi naman ako papatol para sa lalaking gano'n lang ang mukha. Like, duh. I must have been so drunk.

Naghugas lang naman ako ng kamay at lumabas na din. Pero wala akong Baz na nakita sa loob.

"Hey, we're leaving," sabi niya sa'kin paglabas ko. I am about to ask when his eyes cut to me.

"Why?" tanong naman ng lalaki na hanggang ngayon hindi ko pa din alam ang pangalan. "Hindi ba kayo magd-dinner dito?"

"No," sagot ni Baz na ngumiti. "We were just passing by. We'll see you around."

Baz ushers me away from the restaurant with a hand on the small of my back.

"What was that about?"

"They were my batch mates," he says and ruffles his hair like he's ready to pull them out.

"And...?"

"Alright, there were grudges, okay?"

His tone tells me to stop asking but I can't help. "About what?"

He sighs then looks at me and he knows I'm not going to stop asking him. "Him and I were the strongest contenders for Magna c*m Laude back in college. Then he spread a rumor that my family paid the school so I graduate with flying colors."

"So you graduated Magna c*m Laude?" I ask.

He doesn't answer.

I hold on his forearm. "You did?"

Again he doesn't answer.

"What. The. f**k," I laugh. "Gee, just how lucky I am that I have such a perfect boyfriend?"

He spins me around so I'm facing him. "You ask many questions."

"I'm sorry."

"Just get inside the car."

Tahimik lang kaming dalawa sa loob ng kotse. Mukhang pupunta na lang kami sa apartment niya. This annoys me. Nagbihis ako tapos doon lang kami babagsak dahil lang sa batchmates niya? Aba naman.

Kaya naman hindi ko din siya pinapansin. Matapos niyang mag-order ng pagkain tsaka niya lang ako kinausap. "Are you mad?"

"No?" I say but my voice implies the opposite.

"Why?"

"I don't know." I pick at an imaginary lose thread on the hem of my dress. Napaka-childish nga naman ng rason kung bakit ang init ng ulo ko. Pero siya rin naman kasi ts.

"Are we fighting?"

"I don't know," I mumble.

He pulls me by my elbow and takes my hand, pushing his warm fingers in between mine. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for my words to come out like that."

"No, it's not exactly all that."

"What is it?" his eyes are on me but I keep mine trained on his glass table.

"I'm sorry for asking questions, okay? But it's only because I barely know you, Baz. You barely know me too. I just don't understand what's so wrong with that. I know we're not in that serious relationship but..."

"What?" he asks when I can't finish my sentence. I shake my head at him. "Do you want to get serious with me?"

My hand freezes on his hand. Biglang lumakas ang kabog ng dibdib ko. Ito nga ba talaga ang gusto ko? But isn't that too much?

"Hey," he tugs on my hand.

"What?"

He turns my face and looks me in the eye. I want to look away but his hand is keeping my head in place. "I know we don't really know each other. But I like being around you. We can do this seriously if you want."

"Why does it always have to be what I want?" I look down for a second when I couldn't answer. "What do you want?"

His eyes melt a little when he says, "I want you."

I feel the air leave my lungs. Teka lang. Hirap i-comprehend. I want him too pero hindi naman iyon ang dahilan kung bakit ko siya ginawang boyfriend. Kailangan ko lang siya ma-in love sa'kin gaya ng ibang lalaki tapos iiwanan ko na siya.

Also, magseseryoso? Paano? Kapag nagsawa na ko sa kaniya at nakahanap ako ng bagong pupuntiryahin iiwan ko lang din siya. Isa pa, 'yung age difference namin. What am I supposed to tell my family, then? Ano na lang? Noong isang beses nga ako nahihiya para kay Baz na may kasama siyang kasing bata ko. Oh em gee.

But it seems like my reason will completely change. Before I can look away, Baz kisses me. My mind plummets down to nowhere and my body takes over. I kiss him back. Yes, I want you too. This is a different kind of kiss with more urgency. It comes as a surprise that Baz hasn't bitten my lips yet.

"Baz," I say in between kisses.

He slows down but the pressure it still there. He kisses my jawbone behind my ear.

I pull away slightly. "You're doing it again."

"What?" he asks and sweeps my hair to my other shoulder.

"You're distracting me with kisses."

"Am I?" he kisses me again on the same spot.

I sigh and lean to his lips. "That's just what we do. We just kiss and we don't talk."

"We'll talk after this."

"Baz," I whine.

"Alright, alright," he says and pulls away with a grin. "I just really like kissing you. It feels like I'm not the first guy you ever kissed."

"I'm just a born natural."

He chuckles at this and pulls me to his chest with an arm around my shoulders. His lips are somewhere in my hair. "Anything interesting that happened to you this week?"

Umiling ako. Bigla kong naalala 'yung nagsabunutan last week pero parang hindi naman na nagm-matter ngayon. I mean the issue died down. What's the point of bringing it up again?

"Nothing?" tanong niya.

"Well, pinagkaguluhan nila 'yung bag ko. Namigay din ako ng chocolates. I hope you don't mind. Puro calories kasi 'yun eh tsaka hindi talaga ako mahilig sa sweets pwera sa ice cream. The flowers were beautiful. I loved it. Thank you."

"It's a pretty bag."

"You have good taste." I rub my head on his chest. "Kaya mo nga ako nagustuhan di ba?"

He barks laughter at this.

"What?!" kahit ako natatawa.

I feel him shake his head. "Wala."

I grab his hand and squeeze. "What about you? How's work."

"There's not much to it. I'd rather be back in college."

"Ugh. Ang boring kaya ng mga klase."

Before Baz can answer, the food arrives. Umayos naman kami ng upo at doon na kumain sa sala niya. We start to talk about random s**t. Ewan ko ba kung paano napunta na ganoon bigla ang usapan namin. Alam ko kasi dapat nag-uusap kami tungkol sa well-being naming dalawa pero ang galing kasing mag-divert ng topic nito ni Baz. Hanggang sa dumating ang usapan namin sa mga pinapalabas sa sine ngayon.

"Let's go out on the weekend," Baz says when he emerges from the bathroom. Naligo kasi siya matapos kumain.

"Go out? Where to?"

"A date."

Napataas ang kilay ko. "Seryoso ka ba?" biglaan namang bumalik ang sama ng loob ko dahil sa pagbibihis ko nang maganda tapos dito lang ang kinabagsakan namin.

"Yeah," sagot niya habang tinutuyo ang kaniyang buhok. "Think about it. Those are yours, by the way."

Pinulot ko naman ang isang malaking paper bag at pinatong sa kama niya. Puro damit ito at ang una kong hinatak ay ang Adidas na maroon jogging pants. Oh s**t. Damn, ang ganda. Nakita ko na ito sa Twitter noong nakaraan at sabi ko bibili ako pero naunahan ako ni Baz.

"But I like wearing your clothes," nanghihinayang kong sabi sa kaniya. Gustuhin ko man ang mga damit na 'to pero mas gusto ko pa din ang damit niya.

He chuckles. "You can still wear my clothes if you want."

"Will you help me out of my dress?" napatigil siya sa pagkuskos sa ulo niya, nagulat sa tanong ko. "Hirap kasi akong abutin 'yung zipper eh." That is a lie. I can fully manage getting dressed and removing my clothes perfectly. With long arms and thin frame I can reach any spot in my body.

"Right," he slowly says.

I happily bound in front of him. Baz is a guy. Surely, naaakit 'yan sa magandang katawan. "What would you do if I get n***d in front of you?"

"We had this conversation. I'd close my eyes."

"That was under a different circumstance," I say and sweep my hair to one side. "Can you see the zipper?"

"Yeah," sagot niya.

Naramdaman ko ang pagluwag ng damit ko pero hindi ko naman maramdaman ang mga daliri ni Baz. It only takes a few seconds before his fingers reach the end. Ano ba 'yan, ang bilis naman.

I turn around to face him. "Is there something wrong with me?"

"What?" he asks, confuse.

"There has to be something wrong with me. You should be trying to get me into the bed with you and yet you're here standing like a statue."

"Oh, baby," he says and turns away from me, continuing his work with his hair. "You don't have the slightest idea what I want to do with you."

Hay nako, I say inside my mind. Lagi namang ganyan si Basil, puro salita lang. Baka nga bading talaga siya? Oh, crap. 'Wag naman. Bago pa ako kontrahin ng utak ko nagpunta na ko sa banyo niya at inayos ang sarili ko. Nagse-cellphone si Baz sa kama niya pagbalik ko.

"I have to ask you something," he suddenly says when I'm getting on his bed.

Bigla namang lumubog ang sikmura ko kasabay ng pagbaba ko sa higaan. "Yeah?"

"Do you know a guy named Patrick?"

Napatingin ako sa kaniya. Patrick? That rings a bell. Nakakilala na yata ako ng Patrick sa The Vibe tsaka—omg! Patrick pala name ng lalaking naka-fling ko na matagal. Ha! How can I forget? "Yeah, I do know a Patrick. Why do you ask?"

He puts his phone on his nightstand and looks at me. "Just trying to make sure my batch mate's story is true."

"What story?"

"That you broke his brother's heart."

"What?"

"He says you left his brother and it devastated him. He saw your picture on Patrick's cellphone."

What the f**k? Is he serious? What the hell? Paano nangyari 'yun? Gano'n ba talaga kaliit ang mundo? Ilang beses niya bang nakita ang mukha ko para matandaan niya?

"Is it true?"

Napaiwas ako ng tingin kay Baz. I suddenly feel like crying. Wow, ganito pala feeling kapag nalaman ng lalaking gusto mo 'yung mga kalokohan mo noon. I feel so ashamed. Maybe that's the reason why I try to reason out, "But that was months ago."

"How long is months?"

I do a fast recall. "About eight months ago?" I scrub my face. "I met him eight months ago."

"And when did you leave him?"

"Baz—"

"When?"

"Six months ago! Why does it matter anyway? It's all in the past, Baz." Alam kong tumataas na 'yung tono ng boses ko sa kaniya. Maybe ito na nga ang consequence ng pagiging defensive.

"I'm just asking," he says.

"I know!" I made a wild gesture with my hand. "I just don't want to be asked questions like that. Geez," I say and ruffle my hair.

"Why?"

"What else did he tell you?"

"Answer me first."

"What else did he tell you?!"

There is a start of a glare behind Baz's eyes but I'm glaring at him too I don't feel any fear. "He told me to be careful. Maybe you're just using me the way you used his brother."

"f*****g hell," I mutter and tilt my head backwards. "Ako pa nanggamit? Ha!" I shake my head. I'd reason out to Baz, I can tell him what happened but I'm not in the position to tell secrets that are not mine.

"Why are you so worked up about it?"

I roll my eyes. "Obviously because it's not true?"

"Then why are you so defensive?"

"I'm not, Baz," I deny. "I just don't want to explain myself. I've put it in the past and Patrick and his brother should too."

"Why did you leave him?"

"Are we seriously having this conversation?"

His face twists to a grimace. "Why are you fighting with me, Gwen? I just want to know what happened."

"You want to know what happened? Alright, I'd tell you what. I met Patrick at The Vibe and flirted for a couple of months. Most of the relationshit happened on the phone because I refuse to meet him. He got too obsessed with me and started looking for me everywhere. You can call him a stalker if you want. At first I thought it was sweet and funny but then it got too much. And, yeah, you have probably guessed already, he told me he loved me and I left him after that. There! That's the story!"

Baz just stares at me and I scrub on my face in agitation again.

"I'm a horrible human being. I know."

Gusto ko na lang umalis. Ayoko na magpakita kay Baz sa kahihiyan. Umuwi na lang kaya ako ngayon?

Pero bago pa ako makatayo Baz reaches to me. "Baby."

"Tsk. Baz," I say ang pull away from him.

"Listen to me first. I know you have your reasons and it happened from some time already. Don't get frustrated, alright? You're not the only one that has a bad side."

A scoff makes it way to my mouth. "Bad side. I don't think you'll ever have one."

"Don't speak too soon."

I look down for a minute, trying to get my thoughts in the right place. Nadala na naman kasi ako ng emosyon ko. What happened with Patrick... sa lahat ng kagaguhang ginawa ko iyon na ang pinakamalala. I smile timidly at him.

"Will you leave me too, Gwen?"

His question surprises me. My smile gets a fraction wider. "Don't say you love me and I might not."

"Might not," he chuckles before pulling me to him. "Listen, Let's make a deal. I'll let you see everything if you let me see everything."

"How does that work?"

"Let's really try to get to know each other."

"You want to get serious?" I ask him, pulling away so I can see his face so I know this is real.

His fingers trail on my collarbone when he answers, "I do."

I'm scared. I really am. For a girl who jumped from one guy to another, ever since, this is really too much. I mean, I'm just really scared of falling in love with Baz. Freaking hell. It just means there's a new boundary for my emotions. Kung ngayon pa nga lang na nagpapalipas lang kami ng oras stressed na ko, what more pa kaya kung seryosohan na? I'm scared for my well-being.

I'm scared of saying yes and I'm also scared of not saying yes. Fear starts to rumble from my stomach and I answer faster than it can erupt. "Okay."

"Are you sure about that?"

I laugh. "I'm not."

"Neither am I," he answers and it makes me laugh harder. He smiles at me. "Looks like we're going to have a competition of who can stay longer in this relationship."

I grin back at him, feeling a little at ease so suddenly. For a girl who wins most in life, I loved challenges. "Hinahamon mo ba ko?"

He pulls me back to him slowly by my hand. "You and I both know you'll lose."

I only scrunch my nose at him because deep down in the pit of my heart, I know that I will.