The Bad Girl's Gentleman

= Code 14 =

The Bad Girl's Gentleman

= Code 14 =

LESSON #3: IF SOMETHING IS GIVEN TO YOU, LEARN TO RETURN THE FAVOR. Kaya naman nakipagkita ako sa mall sa kuya ko sa malapit na mall sa office niya for lunch. I have to get a gift for Baz.

"Why are you spending too much? Sino ba 'yang kaibigan mo na 'yan?" tanong nito habang mabilis na kumakain.

"Who says I'm spending? I'm your sister. You ought to give me a discount."

"So?"

"You didn't spend a dime on that watch anyway. It was a present from your former client."

"And...?"

"You're annoying."

His lips form a quick smile. "You're annoying, Gwen. You make me come out of work just to nag me about a watch? Tell me who you're going to give it first."

"My boyfriend."

"Pft," he laughs. "As if."

"It's pointless to tell you." Sinabi ko lang naman talaga 'yun dahil alam kong hindi siya maniniwala. Even my brother knows I don't settle for one boy.

"How much can you offer me? I can give it to you for two hundred k."

"Two hundred thousand? Are you kidding me, Kuya? Do I even have that money?"

"No, you don't. That's why I'm not selling the watch to you. Get yourself a part time job and maybe you'll be able to afford it."

I lean on the table and smile at him. "Would you like to see your sister serving plates of foods to your clients?" I shake my head at him. "Not a pretty sight is it? Papangit image mo sa kanila. Bakit nga naman ako magt-trabaho when my family earns too much?"

"You got me there. But I'm still not selling."

I roll my eyes at him. "I do have eighty thousand. I'll buy it."

He shakes his head. "A hundred."

"Eighty-five?"

"Ninety-five."

"Christ, Kuya Archie. Ang laki naman ng binawas mo. Five thousand? May mabibili ka pa ba no'n?"

"Fine. Ninety."

"Deal!" I say. Kinuha ko na ang chequebook ko. Yeah, I do have my own chequebook. Sa bangko kasi dumidiretso lahat ng allowance ko. May mga times na wala akong cash kaya ito lang dala ko. Pipirmahan ko na sana ang papel nang pigilan ako ni Kuya.

"You're really serious about this?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Why are you doing this?" he asks like he's pleading me to stop. He knows he can't make me. "Not even Cass gave something this expensive."

I raise my wrist to his eyes. I give it a slight shake so the bells jingle. "Do you see this thing? I researched about it. It is made in France and the bells are hand-carved on. It costs about a hundred thousand. This bag? You know how expensive Versace can get--you get one for your girlfriend every year, right? So tell me, am I the one who's spending too much?"

Kuya Archie's eyes squints. "Who is he? He's someone older than you are if he is able to give you these gifts. Where does he work? Do I know him? How did you even meet?"

"Woah, slow down with the questions. He's my boyfriend. That's all you'll get."

He smirks. "Kung sabagay, for sure hindi naman siya tatagal sa'yo. We can sell the bracelet afterwards if it's as precious as you say. Ninety thousand would seem nothing."

He reaches underneath the table and pulls a small paper bag. "Take it," he says. "I can't accept your money, though. I'll just pretend the watch magically disappeared."

"Yay!" sabi ko at hinatak na ang bag. Baka mamaya magbago pa ang isip niya. "Don't tell mom and dad, okay?"

He winks at me. "Your secret is safe with me."

Then we share that smile that we used to share when I was younger. It is the smile that will get us both in trouble if one of us gets caught. It is the smile of secrecy.

When I was thirteen and Kuya Archie was still in college, he used to sneak out to go on bars and clubs or gimmicks. My room has an old tree by its side that he used to get in and out of the house. To get there, you have to pass through my window.

Most of the time when he came home, inuuwian niya ko ng pasalubong. Kahit na anong pagkain o kung ano na nakita niyang "baka sakaling" magustuhan ko.

One night, I was home late because I went to a birthday party two streets from our house. Hindi ko alam na nakaalis na pala si Kuya. Natutulog na ko nang marinig kong bumubukas ang bintana ko. Hindi ko na pinansin. My brother knew his way inside my room even when it was dark. He'd leap from the window to my carpet so he doesn't step on any of my limbs.

But that night, pain shot through my left leg. Napabangon ako bigla. Ready na ko na suntukin si Kuya.

Only it wasn't my brother.

May dalawang pares ng singkit na mga mata ang tumingin sa'kin. Hindi ko siya kakilala at sisigaw na sana ako kundi lang biglang sumulpot sa bintana si Kuya Archie. He looked back between the two of us bago binatukan ang lalaki. "I told you to be careful, you idiot. Nagising mo tuloy si Gwen." He easily swung his legs over the sill and managed not to hit us.

"You okay?" tanong ng lalaki sa harap ko.

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Are you sure?" he asked and lifted the blanket off my foot. Gamit ang flashlight ng phone niya sumilip siya.

"Pretty sure."

He dropped his hand and before the flashlight gone off, I had a glimpse of what he looked like. He had glasses perched on his straight nose. One look and you could definitely tell he was Japanese. He had thin lips and clear skin and angular features. He looked handsome.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

"Go back to sleep, Gwen," sabat ni Kuya at may pinatong sa desk ko. "These are the marshmallows you like. Tutulog na kami. Tara na, Ryuu."

"Night, Gwen," the stranger named Ryuu said. "I'm really sorry for stepping on your leg."

"It's fine."

Sinadya kong hindi muna lumabas ng kwarto ko hangga't hindi pa lunch. Alam ko kasing tulog pa sila Kuya. At the dining table, I saw Ate Cass sneaking glances at Ryuu's way who was seating next to her. She was seventeen that time and looked gorgeous. I was a little relieved that I was not the only one who found Ryuu cute. Nakakainis lang na sa una kong crush kahati ko siya.

Still though, napadalas ang pagbalik ni Ryuu sa bahay. Soon enough he was a part of the family. Sa paglabas-labas nila ni Kuya tuwing madaling araw, dalawang beses na lang niya kong nagising. Na-master na din niya ang paglabas at pagpasok sa bintana ko. I remember that one time I wished that he still didn't know his way around so he would have woken me up.

Ryuu and I had gotten fairly close despite the age difference. Madalas kasi ako lang tao sa bahay kapag dumdating sila ni Kuya. Wala din naman masyadong ginagawa noong high school kaya mahilig akong manood ng movies. That was the thing we always talked about. Lalo na 'yung Marvel at Disney.

Sometimes, iniisip ko na may crush siya sa'kin. He stared at my face for too long and I caught him sneaking glances at me more times than I could count. But who was I kidding? Dumating pa nga 'yung panahon na pinimples ako at ayokong lumabas ng kwarto kapag nandoon si Ryuu. It was about a year na hindi ko siya kinikibo.

When I was fifteen, Ryuu was already twenty-one. Gabi na noon at nakatambay ako sa veranda katabi ng kwarto ko para makita kung padating na ba si Via. Mag-sleepover kasi siya. So ayun na nga, nakasandal ako sa railing nang mag-slide ang pintuan.

"...of course, yes. I'll be there tomorrow, bab--" napatigil si Ryuu sa pagsasalita nang makita ako. I raise an eyebrow at him. "Wait, I'll call you later."

"Aren't you supposed to be dating my sister?" tanong ko habang pinapatay niya ang tawag. Totoo naman, kung may ganito kayong family friend natural na nagiging option ang magpakasal ang mga anak.

"Who? Gilly?"

"Cassidy?" I rolled my eyes at him. "Gilly's only three years old. Gee, Ryuu. Paedophile much?"

"Yeah, maybe, I am," he answered and stared at me for too long it sent me another meaning.

I ignored it. "So, what's up with you and your girlfriend?"

"Uhhmm... good, I guess?"

"That's great."

"Is it?"

"Am I supposed to judge?"

"I like you better." Even in the dark, I saw him winked.

I started to walk to the door just to get away from him. Ayoko kasi ng mga ganoong biro. Hindi naman kasi nakakatuwa. Kahit na alam kong walang pag-asa, umaasa ako. "Don't let my brother hear you talk like that."

I was three steps away from the door when the next words that left his lips made me stop.

"Why can't you be a little older, Gwen?"

I spun on my heels. "It's not like it's a choice. Six years is six years, Ryuu. For me, that's a freaking huge gap."

"I know," he said when he was walking towards me. He slipped his fingers in between mine and squeezed. "Six years is too much for us," he whispered and he swept my hair to one side.

I was sure he was going to kiss me. Only then, I was wrong. His lips landed on the corner of my lips.

"Kung pwede lang talaga." He tipped my face by my chin and kissed me once more, this time on the forehead. Then he left me there.

Siya na yata talaga ang first love ko.

"Hoy, ano ba? Ang tagal mo naman!" sabi ko sa cellphone ko.

"Oo na, ito na nga eh. Nandito na ko sa labas."

Tumayo na ko sa kinauupuan ko kanina kung saan ako iniwan ni Kuya Archie. The watch is safely inside my bag. Lumabas na ko at nakita si Enzo.

"Sup, dude?!" I ask and swing an arm around his shoulders, well at least kung hanggang saan ang naabot ko.

"Bakit mo ba ko hinahanap?"

"Well, I need your help for something. You've been to formal parties, right? I need to get a tie for someone."

"Jesus, Gwen," pagtawa niya. "You can just choose any tie."

Umirap ako. "I can't just choose any tie. Ties speak, you know? It has a certain meaning or something like that."

Hinatak ko na siya sa isang store. Halos puro americana ang naka-display sa labas kaya alam kong hindi kami nagkamali ng pasok. There is a rack of ties on one side of varying colors.

"So...?" tanong ko kay Enzo.

"Choose red. You'd never go wrong with red."

"What is it his seventh birthday?" pabalang kong sagot.

"Eh kanino mo ba ibibigay?"

"My boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?" he scoffs.

"Oh whatever. Just choose a tie that says 'I'm perfect but don't look at me. You don't have to.'"

"Uh, the red one?"

"What the f**k, Enzo. You're not being useful right now. Wala ka na bang alam na ibang kulay kundi pula?"

This gets him. He crosses his arms defensively and I c***k a smile inside. He glared at me while he says, "Tell me more about him."

"Oh well, mataas na position niya sa isang company. He's a little workaholic. But he's a softy like a warm pillow."

"What about green?"

Baz usually wears white shirts. "Green seems a little off."

"What about blue?"

I touch a satin tie with a light blue and the next one that is a slight darker shade, close to pastel. "Yeah. But what about the design? I can't give him a plain one."

"Stripes? Dots?"

I scrunch my nose. "That is boring."

"Hi, ma'am! If you're having troubles choosing a design, we offer customization here. You can get it in less than twenty minutes."

Napatingin ako kay Enzo. "Do you any ideas in mind?" he asks me.

Nag-isip ako saglit, until an idea springs in my mind and I grin.

================

I borrowed a short body-con dress from Via's closet and wore my thigh high tan boots. Baz opts for the traditional date for tonight. Hindi ko din alam kung bakit. Akala ko nga ipapasundo niya ko ng helicopter ganern. Haha!

Gusto niyang manood kami ng sine kaya heto kami ngayon kumakain ng popcorn habang pinapanood ang mga trailer ng mga lalabas pa lang na movie.

"Where do you plan to eat afterwards?" tanong ko sa kaniya.

"Do you like something fancy?"

"No. Gusto ko busugin mo ko sa value-meal." I pop some corn in my mouth. "Kumakain ka ba ng fast food?"

"Sometimes. On my most desperate moments."

I roll my eyes. Then notice the armrest. "Hey, we can push this up, right?"

"Yeah."

"This is the first time I'm sharing a seat with somebody," I say and move closer to him. Wew. Ito lang ba purpose nito? 'Yun lang? Hindi manlang ako nahiwagaan. Magkatabi lang kami? Well, ano pa bang ine-expect ko? Baz puts his arm around my waist and I lean on his shoulder. "This is it?"

"Pretty much."

I snort. I really thought there is something special in these seats. The movie is a horror one. Honestly, wala talaga akong taste sa mga ganoong genre. Pero iyon lang ang pinili ko para maka-style kay Baz. Damoves ganern! Instant kapit-sa-braso at yakap agad.

Pero s**t. Nakakatakot talaga 'yung movie to the point na hindi na talaga ako natutuwa. Napakapit ako sa braso ni Baz pero ang magaling na lalaki natutulog na pala. Paano nakakatulog 'to sa kakasigaw ng mga tao, ha?!

The movie was fairly good and I can't shut up about it. "...sayang lang hindi ka nanood. Hmph, sayang pera," sabi ko sa kaniya habang nakaupo sa isang malambot na upuan sa restaurant.

He smiles at me. "Sorry, I was really tired."

"Sure," I say to him.

"Are you mad?"

"No, why would I be?"

"I know that I stress you out most of the time—" I roll my eyes. "I just really want to do the right mundane things with you."

"Mundane?" tanong ko sa kaniya paglapag ng waiter ng steak sa harapan ko. I start to cut it with my knife. "Are we ever normal, Baz? Mismong simula ng relasyon natin abnormal."

"I know," he says exasperatedly.

"And take note, I slept on your bed on the second week we were together. Is that normal? You don't text me. You don't call me. We don't even see each other that much."

He sighs.

"Don't get me wrong, Baz. Your system bothered me at first but it is liveable."

"Give me your plate."

Binigay ko sa kaniya ang plato ko at inabot niya ang kaniya sa'kin. Nagulat ako. Wow, ito pala ibig sabihin nang magkaroon ng boyfriend? Haha! Instant hiwa ng steak. I feel a little guilty so I wait for him to finish cutting what was mine so we can eat together.

"That's why we're trying to normalize," he says to me.

"By watching a movie and eating at a fancy restaurant?"

"Precisely."

"I don't want us to be normal, Baz," I shrug a shoulder at him. "I'd rather be in your bed all cuddled up in your arms and your sheets."

Baz looks at me, his face lit from the light above. "Baby, we're trying to slow down here."

"I don't want to slow down." Nararamdaman ko na ang pag-init ng katawan ko sa simula ng isang away. "Let's talk about this some other time."

As the master of topic diversion, Baz says, "How's the food?"

"Excellent," sabi ko kahit hindi ko pa natitikman. "So, how is the planning for the golden anniversary?"

His face scrunches together. "Tedious. I hate it. I'll probably call somebody for help. I just can't fit it—"

"Fit what?" I ask him as I take a bite.

"Fit it all in my schedule," he finishes.

I raise my eyebrows at him. Heto na naman ba kami sa usapan tungkol sa kung gaano siya ka-busy?

His shoulders slump and he looks around before leaning on the table. "I should tell you."

"Tell me what?"

"Promise me first that you won't tell anyone about it. Not even in the future—if you ever meet some of my family members."

"Uhhh... okay?"

"It's not just the foundation that I am managing right now. That's why I'm so busy."

"Is that related to why you left the last time?"

He straightens up. "No."

I scrunch my nose at him. Akala ko pa naman iyon na 'yung sikreto niyang malupit na ayaw niyang sabihin sa'kin. "I want to see you always, Baz. That's what girlfriends do. We do want our boyfriends. But I'm not the type of girlfriend who will get clingy all over you, you know? I like my space. I like to move around but that doesn't change the fact that I want to be with you. Okay? The last time somebody got too clingy I dumped him."

"I know," he says quietly. I am sure he is recalling our slight fight last week. "I also want to be with you always, Gwen."

"It's okay," I smile at him. "Work comes first. My study comes first. I like this setup we have. I'll adjust for you."

He returns my smile, like in pure adoration. "Thanks, Gwen."

I smile wider. I knew it would work. Medyo labag sa loob ko na hinahayaan ko lang si Basil na magpakasasa sa trabaho niya habang naghihintay ako. But it makes him happy so... sapilitang paga-adjust.

Finally, we have a normal conversation. He asks me about my day and it is a starting point. I summarized my whole week and we really did talk. Medyo naubusan na nga ako ng laway habang nagd-drive si Baz. He is all smiles tonight. Siguro kasi nakatulog nga kanina sa panonood kaya may energy.

"Wait, you're bringing me home?" I got so carried away in our conversation I didn't even realize na pauwi na pala kami sa bahay ko at papasok na ng village.

He glances at me. "Just for tonight. Let's be normal."

"Are you going to walk me to my porch?"

"Do you want me to?"

I laugh. "My dad will see you. Maybe next time?"

"I thought you want to get serious?"

"You wanted to get serious. Do you want to meet my parents?"

"Do you want me to?"

I cough a little. "Not tonight."

He reaches for my hand and continues to drive with the other. "Are you scared?"

"Scared of what?"

"Commitment?"

I'm scared of being alone. But I say, "Yeah. You can say that."

By this time, we were already in front of my house. I know he wants to say something because he hasn't let go of my hand. This is what happens most morning when he brings me home.

"Baby," he squeezes on my fingers and I look at him. "What if I don't leave?"

I don't know what to feel. Baz patiently waits for my answer though. I bite my lips. What should I say? Pang-long term ba 'to? Parang ang bilis? Parang noong nakaraang buwan lang nililigawan ko pa si Baz tas naging kami na. Tas ngayon... magseseryoso na ba kami? Legit ba 'to?

I cross over the console and put my hand on his face. I say the thing I want the most that moment. "Don't leave."

I kiss him. He's not the only one allowed to distract with kisses, right? Baz kisses me back and the way he is clutching on my arm... like he doesn't want to let me go.

"I have to go," I say to him when I pull away slightly.

But Baz doesn't listen and kisses me again.

I giggle. "Stop. We can see each other next week."

"I'll try to make it through one week."

"Now you're being clingy."

He doesn't even deny and just kisses me again.

"Bye," I pull away again.

"I'll call you."

I nod at him and peck on his lips just once more. My limbs tremble just by my extraction from him. Ugh. I want to latch on his body. "Bye," I whisper and he waits until I'm inside the gate before he takes off.

Naghilamos na ko at nagpalit ng damit. Nag-scroll muna ako sa cellphone ko para magpaantok. Feeling ko kasi super hyper pa ng katawan ko. Wala naman akong ininom na kape kanina. Patuloy pa rin ang mga paruparo sa paglipad sa loob ng tiyan ko.

Makakatulog na sana ako habang nagbabasa ng ebook nang biglang mag-ring ang phone ko.

Si Baz.

Akalain mo nga namang tumawag nga siya? Hindi ko na nga pinansin ang sinabi niya kanina dahil ayokong umasa.

"Hello?"

"Hey, baby," he greets. I hear that voice again. His sleepy voice that just sends my spinal cord tingling. I'd give anything to hear that rough voice every night. "Did I wake you?"

"No," I say and turn to my side and close my eyes. "Even if you did, I'd rather have a sleepless night if that means I can hear your voice."

"Maybe I'll call you three in the morning next time."

I laugh. "Don't you even dare."

He chuckles then goes silent for a couple of seconds before he says, "I miss you."

I hug my pillow to my chest. There is a slight flutter in my heart. "Kasama mo lang ako kanina eh."

"I know. But I miss you already."

"It's your fault. Kung pinatulog mo lang ako kasama mo ngayon."

"I'm in Westdell, baby."

"Westdell?"

"In the ranch. It's in Westdell."

"Oh," I say. Doon pala siya umuuwi kapag weekend. Mga one and a half hours ang byahe papunta doon.

He sighs. "Do you want to sleep?"

"I want to hug you."

"Hug your pillow for tonight."

I smile. "It's not as warm as you."

He groans from the other end of the line, like he hates this too. Hearing him does that tickles something inside me. "Let's not do this again. Force me to sleep with you next time."

I giggle. "I will."

"It's already past midnight. Let's sleep."

"Hmmm."

"Good night, baby."

"Good night." I tuck my head on my pillow and squeeze on its fluffiness.

"Kiss me, baby."

Napa-pout ako. As if imagining him sleeping next to me is not hard enough. "Paano?"

"Kiss your phone."

I can't help it. A laugh rises to my lips. Tawang-tawa ako. "Super corny mo ha. Tigilan mo ko."

I can hear him laughing from the other end of the line. "Do it."

I smile before making a kiss sound. "Okay na?"

"Better," he answers. "Good night, baby."

"Good night."

Mas lalo ko pang niyakap ang unan ko. Tapos tiyaka ko lang naalala. s**t. Nakalimutan ko palang ibigay 'yung regalo ko. Ts. Ano ba 'yan, Gwen? Pati pa naman sa sarili mong panghahalik na-distract ka?

"Baby?"

"Yeah?" I answer.

"Good night."

"Good night, Baz."

"Babe."

"What?"

"Good night."

"Hmmm. Good night."

"Good night, baby."

"Oo na," I laugh. "Paulit-ulit? Good night na. Tulog na."

"I just want to hear your voice again."

I'm speechless. My heart soared up the sky and landed on the ground with a splat. I can feel my heart crying. Wtf. s**t ka, Baz. Paano na lang kung ma-in love ako? Shitttt. Bawal 'yun.

Out of panic, I say what he wants to hear just so this stops. "Good night, baby. I miss you too. Tulog na tayo."

"Hmm, good night, babe."

That night, I sleep with fear in my mind, and my heart arguing that everything will be alright.