It's been a week since activity day and surprisingly, Jesse and I have gotten closer. He would bring me gifts or treats everyday when I would get to the field. He would lightly kiss my cheeks every so often, or brush my hair from my face. All I knew was that his touch have been getting more intense, even though it didn't seem possible.
"But I don't get it," I admitted out loud to Matt. It was Saturday evening and we were lying on a blanket on the grass. "Why would you be trying to get him back if you broke up with him?"
"I like a challenge" he joked. Our heads were touching as we gazed up into the sky watching the sun.
I closed my eyes, feeling the sun beat against my face. Believe it or not, this was the first time I just laid in the grass and watched clouds. I've always witnessed the act, but never actually done it. Today was a nice day to just do nothing, and that's was we decided to do.
"What if he doesn't take you back?" I wondered out loud.
"Then it makes it more interesting."
I rolled my eyes as I tried to fight against my smile. A figure stood over me, blocking out the sun. I covered my eyes as I tried to identify the object.
I sat up, my eyes finally meeting deep blue one. He smiled at me beautifully, his hands in his pocket.
"Hola" I smiled timidly, my bottom lip folding into my mouth.
"Hola, novia" Hi, sweetheart.
I began to giggle quietly, his words touching my heart. He has been teaching me small phrases in Spanish; 'sweetheart' was one of the very first. He used it every day, his endearment touching me in placed that's never been touched - not even by me.
"Can I talk to you privately please?" Jesse asked his face unnaturally serious.
"Alright" I mumbled, wondering if I did anything to get him upset.
"No, Chica. I meant Matt"
Matt sat up as he heard the sound of his name. His head turned to mine in panic and freight. In a split second, a small smile graced his lips, humour presenting itself.
Matt stood to his feet and followed Jesse a few feet away. I didn't realize I was nervous until I saw my foot shaking with nerves. What were they talking about? I wondered.
It looked innocent enough as I watched them talk, Matt's back to me. After a few intense minute, Matt joined me again on the blanket.
"What was that about?" I asked nervously
"He just wanted to let me know he wants you." Matt smiled as he hugged me closer.
"Why would he actually tell you that?" I stared after Jesse in wonder as he joined his friends on the other side of the field.
"I've known him for years. This is actually the only summer I haven't talked to him regularly. We are generally close in age as well, so I guess that helped when we first met."
"How old are you and Jesse?" I asked hesitantly.
"He's 20 and I'm 19. Most of the supervisors, councillors, and the coaches are around that age."
I looked at Matt in shock. I was only seventeen. My birthday was all the way in November even though I graduated high school a few weeks ago. I had trouble dating high school guys - well none actually - why would a twenty year old, gorgeous, famous soccer player want me?
"I feel really young" I mumbled, my palms becoming itchy. "What did you tell him by the way when he said that?"
"That I wasn't going to let you go" Matt smirked
"And why would you say that? I thought the whole point of this thing was to make him like me and clearly he does" I was as confused as always. Matt really wasn't making any sense, even after spending so much time with him.
"If I just gave you up so quickly, how would that make him work to get you? Do you want to be seen as someone passed from one guy to another?"
I considered that for a minute. I really didn't mind, they were both amazing guys. But I shook my head because I knew it was the answer he wanted.
He glared at my suspiciously as if he knew I was lying. "No, you don't" he told me "I want him to work to take you from me; I want sweat, blood, and tears!" As dramatic as always, Matt never disappoints.
"So what do I do now?" I begged as I brushed off my dress and crossed my legs. My eyes darted back to where Jesse and his friends were, our eyes meeting. He was watching me keenly. His eyes were soft and gentle, unlike when he looked at Matt.
"Just keep being cute and continue to flirt with him. You know..." he zoned out as he thought to himself. "I've never seen Jesse work this hard to impress anyone."
"Are you kidding me? Look at him. He's perfect, why should he? Lord knows why the hell he wants to be with me." I mumbled honestly. I've been learning to speak my mind a lot lately, especially around Matt. It made me feel better to have someone I can say absolutely anything to without being judged or ridiculed. Now I knew why people socialize to make friends. But I don't know how they kept so many, that was still puzzling to me.
"Only you would put 'Lord' and 'hell' together in the same sentence." Matt joked as he stroked my arm gently.
I looked around for David, and found him staring at us from afar. "Don't you think it's kind of mean to be tormenting the poor guy like this?" I smiled, keeping up the appearance though it did not meet the atmosphere of the question.
"Nothing is fair in love and war" he whispered into my ear, no doubt as he made eye contact with the person behind us.
"Original" I giggled for show. My giggling stopped abruptly when I looked back over to Jesse. He posture had changed. Even from where I sat I could see the tightening of his jaw. His sexy jaw. The way his eyes made silent threats as he looked at me Matt, who had his lips on my skin.
I breathed and swallowed, my eyes falling to my lap. This wasn't the best thing to do. What if I was truly hurting him... or myself?
"Hey" I stared up into olive eyes that belonged to Justin. "Could I borrow you for a second?" he asked.
"Me?" I pointed to myself awkwardly "... or Matt?" It would make more sense if he wanted to talk to Matt rather than me.
"You" he said, his smile friendly. Matt nodded to me and winked when Justin's back was turn. I followed Justin hesitantly, not knowing what he could possibly say to me. What the heck would we talk about?
He walked off the field and into the forest, the trees beginning the shade the sun. He was going to kill me! Why else would he bring me in the woods if he wasn't? I looked back at the opened as it became enclosed by the trees.
Why are you still following him like a fool? Turn around and go back! But I ignored my inner voice and continued to follow Justin until Jesse's face came into view. I suddenly felt safer, my body finally relaxing.
When we reached him, Jesse muttered 'thanks' to Justin and he left. His eyes were timid and calm as he leaned against the tree. When he grabbed a hold on me, I began to giggle. "Why are we all the way ou-"
He took my lips with his, caressing mine with his own. My heart began to beat out of control when I realized he was kissing me. He was kissing me! His lips were soft and his tongue was sweet. His tongue lightly brushed against mine as he deepened the kiss, my heart falling to the ground. It reached something deep, deep inside me.
This was nothing like Matt had told me. This wasn't even close to how Matt kissed me.
His arm tightened around me and he held me closer, our lips still entwined. I began to sigh loudly, making sounds I have never heard come out of my mouth. I ran my fingers into his silky curly hair, pulling it. He groaned into my mouth as our tongue collided.
When we pulled away to catch our breath, I realized that I was the one now against the tree with Jesse bracing against me. I stared up into his eyes and he looked down into mine. I could feel his erection against my stomach as we tried to catch our breath, my mind going crazy.
I pulled his head down towards mine, something deep inside me taking over. I pressed my lips to his lightly before playfully nipping at his low lip. He closed his eyes tightly and rested his forehead against mine.
"Usted me esta volviendo loco" You're driving me crazy. His whispered, his sweet breath brushing against my face. I heard loco and immediately, I knew what he meant.
"You think I'm crazy?" I pouted as my heart sunk. Then why the hell would he kiss me? Does he just go around kissing crazy women? Well that would explain his interest in me, I sighed.
His chuckle threw me off as he placed his lips to mine tenderly. "I'm crazy... about you" he half smiled, his lips looking more delicious by the minute. "I didn't mean to put you in this position," he mumbled. Oh, you can have me in any position you'd like, I wanted to say but kept my mouth shut. Matt would not approve of that sentence; it would be too desperate by his standards. "But I can't watch you with him anymore" he stared down at me, as if waiting for me to say something.
"Oh" I managed to mutter. The range of words I actually wanted to say would make the conversation totally awkward and were completely inappropriate. His body was still against mine, for cry out loud. I wanted to wrap my legs around him and ask him to have his way with me. What am I saying?
"I don't expect you to feel the same way," he muttered "but I really like you."
My mouth was not able to open. I couldn't say anything that would do him justice. Before I could catch my breath properly, his hand brushed against my cheek and his lips were on mine again. He was going slow and sensually, as if he was trying to kiss me into an orgasm. I began to make sounds that felt unnatural to my lips and ears as he slowly began to kiss his way down my jaw... my neck... my shoulder...
I was panting out of control, his hands were roaming over my body freely... and I wanted it to...
I gasped in surprise when his hands found the sensitized skin under my breast, teasing it.
"Jesse..." I cried softly into the trees. We were covered from the outside world. The trees smelt damp and earthy. The cool air lingered around us as the trees covered the sun, allowing little to no light.
He groaned when I said his name "Sus gemidos son bebe tan sexy" Your moans are so sexy, baby. He teased against my skin, my breathing become rougher. I had no idea what he said, but it turned me on even more. What was happening to my body? I have never felt this way before. I wanted to scream, cry, and shout all at the same time. Only he could do this to me...
"Amber...? Bambi...?" I heard Matt's voice as it echoed through the trees. Jesse pulled away from me as if he was suddenly awake after falling asleep.
"f**k!" he ran his fingers through his hair roughly as his eyes projected regret. Was he regretting kissing me? Was he regretting his words earlier...? "Amber, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be doing this... s**t! f**k" he breathed as he paced in front of me.
Did we do something wrong? I straightened my dress and stood there watching him mentally beat on himself. I played with my fingers quietly, still leaning against the tree when Matt came into view. Well, I guess if I was going to be killed - like I thought earlier - Matt would come searching for me. It was a good feeling to have.
"Oh, good, you're in one piece. Hey, Jesse," he greeted with a smile. Jesse's face looked torn, as if he wasn't sure what to do. Matt extended his hand to me and I ran to take it. "Come, we have to head back. It seems it might begin to rain"
As Matt pulled me with him through the trees, I couldn't help but to look back into Jesse's eyes, which was still filled with regret.
--
"You dirty girl" Matt smiled in approval as I told him what happened between Jesse and I. "We are actually driving him mad. But I don't like that you succumbed to him so easily." Matt shook his head. We were in my room lying in my bed.
"What do you mean?" I asked in confusion. Every detail of today was still vivid in my mind as I ran through them, unable to keep the smile off my face.
"You were moaning, Bambi. He was touching you however he pleased and you didn't stop him. No wonder he had that look of terror on his face. He's a good guy, it obviously doesn't sit well with him that he was doing that with you while you were 'with me'"
"What was I suppose to do. His mouth..." I breathed "and his hands were all over me... and it felt good" I whispered although we were the only ones in the room.
Matt stared at me as if something just came to his mind. "Are you a virgin, Bambi?"
I stared at him in shook and surprise as the words came out as if they were the dirtiest words in the world. I glanced down at my fingers as my skin heated and my throat dried.
"It just keeps getting better" Matt laughed as he pulled me into a hug.