The Girl

Chapter 5: Jason Burrow - The First Clue

This was my first time inside her house. I’ve only been outside on the driveway or her porch. It’s a lovely house, a mixture of the old and new exterior. Antique looking from its appearance with the terracotta brick walls that aged under the sun and the weather, looking wiser every season. When you walked inside it was another dimension. Modern and neat with simple Scandinavian style types of furniture, white walls filled with family pictures and arts gave warmth to the overall interior design. 

It’s quite big, not too small, but smaller compared to mine, and yet it’s inviting. Mine was big, with many unnecessary rooms because of no one there except me and several housemaids. My Mom was not always there, she stayed mostly in Angeles with my father – he ran the family's law firm with my uncle from my mother's side. Both of them are lawyers, it’s like the ‘must’ profession in my family, and they expected me to be the same as they were but it’s not what I want.

I saw her little brother playing in the living room with Rose – their full-time nanny. His cheeks were chubby like any toddler should. He has the same big green eyes and a heart-shaped face. He looked at me – or rather to an empty space beside me. His hand was waving spiritedly.

“Rosie…look! A ghost!” He said to his nanny. He obviously saw Alex – I’m not surprised.

“Rukka it’s not polite pointing at people like that or even to a ghost,” she said, wisely. She didn't seem surprised or shocked to hear that from a toddler’s mouth, it’s like a normal thing. I guessed in this family, it’s normal.

Reinn came down from the second floor, alone - Rae had been up there for a while. She reached for her baby brother and swayed him up in the air.

“Reinn…” he giggled. “I missed you,” he said in his babyish voice.

“Oh…I missed you too my little prince, the love of my life, my handsome little guy…” She kept going on, calling his many nicknames, which made the baby giggled much louder.

He was pointing at me – or maybe at Alex. “Look! A ghost!” his smile widened.

“His name is Alex…go and introduce yourself,” She held his little chubby hand, and led him in my direction.

“My name is Rukka…I’m 4,” but his finger showed two instead of four. 

I heard Alex chuckling next to me, who wouldn’t be? Looking at a mini male Rae. “I’m Alex and this is my friend Jason.”

“Hi Rukka,” I said, brushing his soft baby hair. He’s smiling at me, the same smile as Rae’s and Reinn’s.

“I see you’ve met the little spoiled prince of Sameera?” Rae said as she walked down the stairs.

Rukka’s hands were up in the air, wanting her to pick him up. I was the only child in my family, I’m quite envious of this sibling’s love they had – I wished that I had it too.

“My Mom said we could come and see her now,” she gave Rukka back to Rose.

We’re standing inside her Mom’s office. An oak brown firm table was placed in the corner of the room under a big glass window with teak wood frame – allowing the sun to shine right through the glass and fill the room, while very large bookshelves were covering the other side of the room – filled with many kinds of books.

A big old black and white picture hung above a brick fireplace. It attracted me the most. It’s a picture of a family, portraying in front of a caravan. Sort of a nomad family. A Roma’s family.

“A Roma family?” I asked Rae.

“Yes…that man over there – the one who sat on a chair – he was my Mom’s great-great-great-grandfather. The first Sameera in the country.”

It made things clear to me now, why she had this distinctive exotic sort of face. She’s a Roma by blood.

“That picture was taken in the late 19th century when they arrived in Angeles from Europe,” a woman's voice came from the door behind us. I turned around to see the source of that voice. She had the same heart-shaped face, the same big green eyes, and the same beautiful smile. She was Rae in her early forties.

“Hi, nice finally to see you Jason…face to face,” she greeted me warmly. “Hi to you too, Alex the ghost,” she nodded at my side, “I heard a lot about you guys, especially…”

“Mom!” Rae said cutting her words, giving her a warning look. Her Mom was smiling at her.

“Rae told me that you need my help, Alex. What can I do for you,” her hand moved to the chair allowing us to sit.

“I need to know why I’m here…” Alex said. “Why am I still in this world?”

The girls sat down on the carpet floor, side by side with their Mom. Three angelic faces were staring at us.

“He lost all of his memories,” I explained. “He only remembered his name, Alex.”

“Well that’s normal in a ghostly way,” she said. “You see, most of the ghosts didn’t remember their life, but it’s there in your mind,” she tapped at her own head. “It’s like playing with blocks, you have to gather it and place it in such a way to build a house or a building or anything that you wanted it to be.”

“I tried to roam the city, looking for a place or sight that triggered my memory but…” he sighed, “but there’s no luck.”

“Yet,” she added, strongly. Her eyes looked fixedly to the empty chair beside me and her forehead furrowed like she’s thinking deep. “There are many reasons why ghosts have amnesia, tragic death, one of it or....magic involvement.” She then carefully said in a low voice. 

I was stunned.

She turned her face towards her daughter as if she didn’t want to continue on the previous subject. “What have you done to help him, girls?” She asked her daughters.

“We tried to look for him on the internet, but Alex is a very common name and pulled a lot of information,” Reinn said. “We tried to add San Rafael, still too many hits.”

She looked at the empty chair next to me, observing Alex – that’s what I thought. “Try to describe him to me girls?” She requested.

This would be the first time I could imagine his face. All I could hear was just his voice, not his face.

“For starters, he looked like Jason,” Reinn said. I was quite surprised to hear that. “They looked like twins,” she added.

“They have the same bright brown hair and a little curl in the forehead, not to mention the same milky brown eyes,” Rae said, her forehead wrinkled. “Almost the same height, but Jazz is a little bit taller by one or two inches perhaps,” she added. “He’s wearing quite an oldies style…like vintage style.”

“It’s not vintage Rae,” Reinn corrected, “Vintage was style around the ’20s to ’50s. His outfit was more around like the ’60s or ’70s. I must say, you look quite fashionable for a ghost,” she smiled after giving a quick fashion lecture.

I could see Rae rolled her eyes. I chuckled.

“Is it normal for a boy by 16 wearing such an outfit?” Their Mom asked.

“You know what? It’s not Mom…I mean…He’s too young to wear that,” Reinn said, agreeing.

“Do you girls still remember the old lady from the Windchester castle? Her ghost was wearing the 17th-century outfit.”

I think I know where this was heading, but I’m not that sure.

“Well that’s because she lived in the 17th century…what…waits a minute,” Rae’s eyes were getting bigger and brighter. She spun her head in her Mom’s direction.

“Are you saying that Alex might live around the ’60s or ’70s?” I asked – not certain with my question.

“There’s a chance that he might,” Their Mom said. “You see, sometimes ghosts are attached to their own time.” She stood and walked to the big shelves, pulling a photo album. “His outfit looked like what my uncle would've worn around the ’70s,” she showed me an old picture. 

A man was standing in front of a Ford classic car. He wore a dark-brown turtleneck – the hands’ sleeves were tucked up to the elbow – and a sort of white trousers.

I imagined his face to what they had described Alex earlier. I think I saw him now, I could see Alex – in my thoughts. Well, it’s quite easy to picture my face and wearing such an oldies 70’s style.

“So we look in the wrong year…we should pay attention in the ’70s instead nowadays,” Rae said. “I think we should go to the library, to look for old obituaries or old newspapers.”

“That’s a great idea,” her Mom said, putting the album back in its place.

“So…if I lived around the ’70s, where have I been all these years? I sort of woke up about 3 months ago, in Jazz’s room…I mean…” he gave a lot of thought, to explain what troubled him so much. “I mean, shouldn’t I’ve been haunting this town from the ’70s but I didn’t…I don’t know, this too much to swallow in one time.”

“Maybe your souls were unconscious during those times; from the ’70s until you sort of awakened in his room.” Rae’s Mom tried to explain.

“So where has he been? – when his soul was unconscious,” I asked, wondering if he was in heaven or hell or out in unknown limbo or maybe out in the galaxy.

“I’m not in heaven for sure…but then again I’m not quite certain, since I didn’t remember,” Alex said. I saw Rae’s eyes moving from the empty seat next to me to the wooden shelves across the room, Alex was moving. “Was heaven beautiful and warm, with rivers of nectar flowing inside, filled with flowers, something like the bible described? Or was hell so dark and hot, echoed with the sinner’s screams of pain? I don’t remember…” His voice sounded so gloomy and sad.

“But that’s not what I want to know,” I could hear his footstep walking nearby - he’s back in the empty seat again. “I want to know who I really am: where did I live? Who my parents were? Did I have a brother or sister or maybe both? And how did I die? Did I suffer when I was dying? Or was it a quick death, that I didn’t even see it coming?”

I would have so many questions too - like he’s now - if I was in his position. Some say: Ignorance is bliss. But I have to add: Not knowing yourself or all things about yourself is a disaster.

“One step at the time, Alex,” I said to calm him down. “We had to crawl before we could walk, to take little steps before we could run…no one just simply ran after they’re born,” I changed my position, my body moved closer to the empty chair. “Let’s use the possibility that you’re living in the ’70s as our one clue – the first clue – then we’ll find the rest.” If I could touch his hand, I think I would do that, just to calm him down.

“Yes…I think I could live with that…or living my death with that,” Alex said, chuckling over his statement.

“But I keep wondering…” I looked at Rae’s Mom. “When I accidentally overheard Rae talking to a ghost in the girls’ locker room, why hadn’t Alex seen her…I mean, the ghost girl?”

“Well…” she straightened her sitting position. “Ghosts will only see what they want to see, and allow some people to see them, not all…but our family is different. We have this gift to see them, even when they didn’t allow us.”

“But how can’t I see my image in the mirror?” Alex asked, It’s new information for me, cause I thought that he could. “If I only see what I wanted to see then shouldn’t I see my reflection?” He added it’s sort of made sense.

“You’re not a living person; your molecules are different from us. The mirror couldn’t absorb the light from you therefore it couldn’t reflect your image in it.”

“But can they see each other? The ghosts I mean…let say - if Alex allowed himself to be seen by another ghost, they will see each other right?” I mumbled away, didn’t even know where my question was headed to.

“It’s possible, if there’s some sort of connection, for instance, they die the same way or they had family relations, other ghosts could see each other.”

“But why can't Jazz see me, even though I'm now letting him see me?”

Rae’s Mom smiled. “Not all eyes were made to see ghost Alex,” she said. “Even when you focus your energy to materialize, some eyes still can’t see you. Jason in this case is only able to hear you and can’t see you.”

“When you say materialized, it means I can appear or become human again?”

“In some ways, you might, with the help from Wicca power, or in some events or holy day.”

Talking to Rae’s Mom was like talking to a professor that had done some deep and advanced research on ghosts. She could explain what and why – answering each of our questions one by one.

“I never knew that I looked like Jazz until today,” Alex said. Well, that made two of us. I didn’t know that either.

“You guys are like the spitting image of the same person,” Reinn said. “But Mom, do you have any clue why his soul has been unconscious for all that time? I mean, it’s a long window of time – from the ’70s until now – and I was wondering why now?”

“Ghosts can’t decide when they want to be conscious nor when they don’t want to be, but I have to admit that it’s quite fascinating me.”

Rose – the nanny – entered the room with a tray full of tea in her hands. She walked slowly to the coffee table - her hands were shaking a little bit. I rose to help when my hand accidentally knocked the tray off her hand.

A teacup was flying loose in the air, fell down, and then it stopped in mid-air.

Yes! It’s stopped falling. It’s flying in the air, no string attached.

“Oh…Thank you, Alex,” Rose said, reaching for the cup. But the cup was moving away from her reach.

Did Alex do that? Did he catch the falling cup? He didn’t even succeed in reaching for a bottle yesterday. 

“Did you see this Jazz?!” He said to me, excitedly. “Can’t you believe this? I mean…wow!” He’s laughed, disbelieving what just he managed to do.

“Congratulations Alex,” Rae said, clapping her hand, supporting. “It’s your first touching phenomenon.”

“Oh! Wow!” He said again.

Yes. Wow! That’s totally awesome.

He put the cup on the coffee table, and suddenly the cup flew free again in the air.

“Maybe not just focusing, Rae,” Alex said, still holding the cup. “You also need to reflect that you’re holding the cup in your mind,” he added. “When the cup fell, I was thinking that I should catch it before it touches the floor…I mean…It’s just a reflex.”

“Surely, that thing will come handy someday or maybe to me,” I said.

“Oh yeah, how?”

“Well, now you can help me in the morning, not just standing there, doing nothing, watching me try to find my key and my book.”

Alex laughed. “Yeah, you wish bro! You wish.”

“Well…I mean if you decided to haunt me, you have to be useful you know.” We all laughed. It’s been quite a day for me and Alex.

“Should I prepare the dinner Radne?” Rose asked the lady of the house.

“Yes, I think you should cook a rather fancy dinner for us.” Rose dismissed herself from the room, heading to the kitchen. “Will you join us, Jason? Alex?”

“Well…” I hesitantly replied to the invite.

Rae touched my arm, she gave me the look – the one that you couldn’t refuse, the angelic gorgeous, charming look – and said, “Please stay, you said that you always dine alone.”

She remembered what I said. Even though I’m not deliberately saying those facts and I thought that she didn’t even listen to it but she actually listened.

“Okay…let me call Camie and tell her that I won’t be home for dinner.” I surrendered to those big green eyes, just another excuse for me to spend my time with her, and her family. “Not that I dine with a lot of people,” I said.

“You always dine with me you know? If you can see me,” Alex said.

“Not like you eat anyway,” I replied.  He laughed.

The dinner was not romantic, not the sort of what I imagined in my mind, having a romantic dinner with Rae - but it’s more than okay. I have to admit that Rose cooked very well.

We had roast chicken with cranberry juice and potato cheese salad. A glass of wine for the girls’ Mom and Rose, glasses of Coke for us teenagers and not to mention milk for the toddler. Rose even served a plate for Alex, although he’s not eating, it’s more a friendly gesture, implicitly saying that he was welcomed, in a sort of way.

“Mrs. Manor,” I said.

“Please call me Radne,” she said, taking a sip of her wine.

“Radne, I would like to invite Rae to my friend’s party on Friday night after the game.”

“Oli invited me too, Mom. To Cody’s party,” Reinn said with a mouth full of salad.

“And why doesn’t Oli ask my permission like Jason here?” Radne looked at his little daughter.

“I’ll ask Oli to call you tomorrow,” she replied.

“Make sure he does that, and I give you my permission,” She’s not a tough Mom in any sort of way, but she’s quite strict to her daughters. “I’m okay if you want to take Rae with you, as long as you take her home before midnight,” she said to me, giving me that Mom looks – the one that every Mom’s giving to a guy who asked their daughter out.

“Yes Ma’am, not to worry, she’ll be home before midnight, safe and sound.” I gave her a salute and she laughed over it.

Despite how I wanted to be there with her, but It’s time for me to go home. I don’t want to give a bad impression on my soon-to-be-girlfriend’s Mom. 

Haha…Don’t I’m so overconfident. Soon to be my girlfriend. But anyway, I have to be confident; otherwise she won’t be my girlfriend.

Just between me and you, I decided to tell her about how I feel on Friday night. I need all the luck in the world so she would say yes.

Is this how it feels before proposing? It’s not like I’ll propose to her to marry me – but someday I will – or maybe I should propose to her now just to be sure that she won’t go dating someone else, saying; “will you be my wife about five or six years from now?”

Anyway, the notch in my stomach got a little bit fastened than it used to. I have to make that night to be perfect – I gazed at Rae, who’s sitting across me, - I have to.