Beginning with you

Am frustrated

was too great to be ignored, so she kept her cool and prayed more.

Two years passed and nothing came. Tosin felt like she was going to run mad, she prayed every night, fasted until it showed in her size, gave herself more to her husband and even seduced him on days he wasn't interested, yet, nothing came. She was getting frustrated and her husband was beginning to notice.

"God, I have prayed. I have wept every night for the past two years asking you for a child, it is going to be my anniversary again, give me this gift, please." Tosin cried as she knelt beside her bed and prayed. The door to the room squeaked from outside and she knew it was her husband, just returning from work. He joined her quickly and responded amen as she prayed.

Then came the third year, the fourth, and the fifth. She began to change, she became more quiet, especially in public functions that had many relatives in attendance and her husband made them shamelessly attend.

"Ha ha, is that not Rotimi's wife? How are you and our babies?" Many of them would ask harmlessly, although Tosin also knew that some meant harm and had intentionally passed the statements as a taunt to frustrate her.

"My dear, my baby was clamouring to come to your house and play o, but I couldn't allow her to come, abi which child is she going to play with?"

It was Ibironke, she was Rotimi's brother's wife, Gbenga. The only set of people that were not believers by all standards and did not like the fact that Tosin and Rotimi were their parents' favourites. She had thought she was the only one seeing hell until Sewa, the family's last born, walked in angrily. Ibironke left her quickly. She knew the young lady was the no nonsense type and her love for Tosin would make her deal with anyone that crossed her path ruthlessly. She hissed and passed an empty wine glass to an usher's tray. It was their father's 70th birthday and the house was full.

"What is it,Sewa?" Tosin managed to ask, hiding her own frustration.

"Sebi it is that our elder brother, Brother Gbenga, how could he just look at Rotimi and remind him of his age and...and..."

"She stuttered, not wanting to use the word childlessness.

" Childlessness," Tosin helped her to complete what she started.

"No, no, no, don't say that." She

rebuked her.

"Ibi ... Ibironke just reminded me too, a..."

"She did what?!" Sewa attempted to move but Tosin stopped her. She knew what it meant. The lady would have said the worse things to her and walked about without remorse.

She was the man's last child, yet she was married with three children. Rotimi married next and then their unbelieving older brother got married after

impregnating Ibironke and making her a mother outside wedlock, something they called a mistake but gladly repeated the second time. Her second child was a year old recently and the mere fact that Daddy Ola had compared them to Tosin and Rotimi who went the right way, nauseated them. The two were bent on frustrating them. Although Rotimi had been in past relationships before accepting Jesus, his wife on the other hand had embraced chastity until marriage

"Sewa," Tosin called calmly. "You don't

have to confront her."

"You know I can handle this, Tosin, right?"

The woman nodded back gently, pouting her mouth in a futile trial to fight back the hot tears that now burnt her eyes.

"Please, don't. She is our senior you know,"

"Oh, agbaya, you mean?"

"And she is right Sewa, she is right." She let her tears drop freely this time.

"No oo, don't say that." She consoled the woman dragging her to a quiet corner of the house. It had a long seat that could accommodate them both so she sat next to her.

"Sewa, every time I look at him," her eyes strolled to her laughing husband who was bending slightly in front of their father looking like a man without worries. "...and remember that I have not been able to give him a child after

six years, my heart, my heart breaks into a thousand pieces." She sniffed.

"You are not the giver of children Tosin, God will do your own."

"When Sewa? When? I have prayed, vigiled, cried, begged, I don't even know what else to do."

"Wait." Sewa told her.

"I don't want that on my list anymore." "Then are you sending God out of the

plan?"

"Sometimes I wish I could."

"But I know you wouldn't. Trust him, in and with everything, Tosin. You love the Lord, perfect. Keep loving him. You love your husband, great. Love him more." Sewa told her.

"Sewa, I am happy you are my sister in law."

"And I am happy you made my brother the happiest man in the world." She told her. "Okay, you know what, I am bringing Fiyin over to your place this weekend. Her brothers are already spending time with Dare's parents so they wouldn't be able to join her." She explained.

"Ha! I would be glad to have Fiyin over, or should I take her with me from here?" She asked, lifting her face with a smile.

"You are such a sweet soul. Okay, let me tell Dare, if he says yes now, I will bring a few things to the house

tomorrow so she can stay..." "One month," Tosin interjected.

"One month? What about her school?" She asked.

"I have a car, I don't work yet, I can always take care of her, take her to school in the morning, drive her back in the afternoon and take care of her needs."

"Are you sure you want to go through that stress?"

"Stress?" Lai lai! It is not stress oo. It is not stress at all. I will do it if her father allows me."

"Awwwnnn, okay, let me ask Dare." She finally told her.

Dare didn't say no, he put up a randy show and was glad all the children were finally leaving the house. It was going to be another honeymoon in their house. They were happy the boys were spending a month away too. Not that they didn't love their children, but they

loved to spend time together and alone. Fiyin was Four, Roy was six and their older brother, Richy was nine. They had been happily married for ten years and everyday still seemed like their wedding day.

They had met on campus, married once they graduated, and had their first child after service. Although her father had

"You can take her." She told the happy woman who wore a beaming smile as she spoke.

"Thank you!" She kept yelling happily.

Three weeks felt like three days, Tosin dreaded the fourth week. She was going to miss the child. They were very close. Fiyinfoluwa talked like she was an adult having answers to her many questions and even when she wasn't talking, she

was acting like she was an adult daughter of the family. Rotimi loved spending time with her before bedtime, he would go to her room, sing her a lullaby and happily wait for her to sleep off before exiting her room.

On this night, Fiyin had requested to see her big mummy and daddy. That was what she called them. Once her mum told her, she had never called the couple anything else.

"Fiyin, you said we should come to

your room." Tosin reminded her like she had forgotten about it.

"Yes big mummy," she playfully answered back and sat up, adjusting her clothes like she was a nineteen year old that had something to hide. The two chuckled beneath their breath as they watched the adorable child.

"Knee down mummy, knee down daddy," she ordered them calmly as they knelt and then she climbed out of her bed and knelt with them. The two mature people marveled but obeyed the

special child.

"I pray from my heart for you big daddy and big mummy, that the joy you have made me feel these few weeks, the Lord will multiply and send back to you, next week I will be going home, I pray for you that another me will come back inside your house in Jesus name..." she prayed and then Rotimi heard his wife sniffle, he knew she was crying, he dropped her hand and drew her into his arms gently stroking her shoulder. By the time she finished praying even Rotimi's eyes were red. He couldn't

believe it. She even prayed for their own Roy and Richy.

Tosin mused at the girl beside her in the car as she returned home on the fourth week. She had made her hair into a double pony tail style and then gave her so many gifts for her parents and herself.

"Why do people do bad things, big mummy?" She started asking questions. Her childish voice denying her the seriousness she needed to ask the question.

"Emm, I don't know," she shrugged. "Maybe because they are just naturally bad people who have not submitted to Jesus Christ." She told her.

"Okay, so does that mean that God is bad? If God is not bad, then why do people die?" She asked again. This time, Tosin's eyes widened in shock.

"No! God is not bad and God cannot be bad. Whatever God does is good even when it looks bad." She told her.

"Wow! So God is permanently good?" She asked again.

"Permanently good, yes, yes, he is." Tosin drove her home in wonder wishing the girl could stay longer. Once her parents saw her, it was obvious they had missed her too. Dare stepped out in his short khaki pants and white sleeveless shirt. Fiyin rushed into her father's arms as the two waited for Tosin to bring her things down. Once the baby box was out, Dare was already standing next to the car to help her with it.

"Thank you so much Tosin," he told her, trying to collect the bag from her.

"Don't worry, Dare, I will have it." She told him as she took the bag in, following behind Dare and his daughter.

Tosin could not deny it, she missed the child, Fiyin. She was the life of the house. Her husband was always home and she herself did nothing but wake up and sleep. She was a barrister and plans were already ongoing to open her own chambers, an idea she dreaded until the

ultimate need showed up. She had nothing to do at home, so once she told Rotimi, he didn't argue, in fact he was glad she was finally going to get a distraction.

Four weeks had passed and Tosin had been having terrible morning sicknesses. She was throwing up, feeling faint and tired plus, she had missed her period. She was sure this wasn't malaria, she was either pregnant or pregnant. She told her husband who thought she was too anxious and should calm down to