LOVE TAP

Chapter 5- Ryan

My mind kept wandering back to Saturday night's game... Not only because it was a win for us, but I couldn't get Chloe and Dax out of my mind. Their smiles and pure joy after Dax made his winning shot... I couldn't wait for this weekend so that I could see them again. Something about being around them was addicting and made me wish I had the opportunity to spend some more time with them.

The week seemed to drag on in anticipation of the weekend...

The things I usually did throughout the week in order to prepare for a game seemed unimportant this week, and I struggled to focus. Every practice and training session seemed to last an eternity as I wondered what this weekend would bring and if Chloe and Dax would show up to claim Dax's prize.

"What's going on with you man? All week you seem zoned out... Everything okay?" My best friend and teammate Jason asked me as I chugged back water, after finishing my weightlifting sets.

"Yeah everything's fine, I guess I just have a lot on my mind." I didn't want to mention Chloe to Jason... I knew if I did he would think I was insane... After all, why would a single guy be drawn towards a single mother with children when I have puck bunnies throwing themselves at me every day? I know to most of my buddies and teammates, a woman with children just seems like a lot of unnecessary baggage that they don't want to have to deal with... But I think that what draws me to Chloe the most, is seeing what a great mother she is, and that there is more to her than just chasing after some wealthy guy that can make her life easier... Every woman I have dated since making it to the NHL has had a hidden motive to being in a relationship with me, and I was fed up. I needed a change... Seeing Chloe and Dax having fun at the game, felt like exactly what I needed.

"If you need to talk I'm always here man... The last thing we want is for you to be stressed out and unable to play this weekend... We wouldn't stand a chance without our Captain on the ice with us." I smiled at Jason and gave him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, but inside I could feel my chest tighten in the slightest way... I was happy to be needed, but it was getting old having everyone always depend on me so much.

***

When Friday night rolled around, I changed my shirt three times...

It was an obligation to dress nice on game days anyway, but knowing that tonight was the night that I would get to see Chloe and Dax again, made me nervous in a way that I was not used to... I wanted the night to be perfect. I wanted to make a good impression on Chloe and make sure that Dax's prize lives up to his expectations... But I also knew that jittery nervousness inside of me was because I wanted Chloe to like me, in a way that I hadn't felt in years.

Girls have always liked me due to my talent with hockey, I never really had to try, they were always just throwing themselves at me. But Chloe seemed different, I wanted to make a good impression with her... I wanted her to like me for me, for my brain and personality, not just for my skills on the ice. Chloe seemed like the first girl in a long time, who might be interested in who I am as a person, instead of the girls who deafly cling to me, too busy dreaming of whatever glamorous life they think they will end up with if they stay with me, then actually listening to what I have to say.

Although the thought of meeting a smart girl who cares about what I have to say was exciting to me, it was also a bit nerve-racking as I realized that it has been ages since I have had an intellectual conversation with someone, who wasn't just some ditsy girl or talking hockey with the boys. I suddenly feared the thought that I might not be as smart as I had hoped... Maybe in Chloe's mind, I am nothing but a ditsy dumb hockey player, the same way I feel about the puck bunnies that won't leave me alone...

As I finally decided on a final outfit, I tried to shake off the nerves of the evening, and all of the extra nerves I had just caused myself...

'Focus Ryan... Get your head in the game.' I hopped up and down on the balls of my feet as I tried to shake out all the extra stress and focus on the now... It is my job to focus on the game. It is my job to be the best and win for my team... I knew that I needed to push Chloe from my mind so that I could do my job.