The Search

Chapter 31

My world seemed to tremble after hearing those words from Psalm. What he had said was connected to my dream. Was it a coincidence?

Sabi nila, bawat panaginip ay may pahiwatig. I didn't believe in dreams come true, really. Personally, when someone had dreamed about something, he or she had been thinking of that the whole day, it had nothing to do with reality. But this time, it was different.

I was thinking of Mom's case all the time, but never did I think of Kye behind all shits. Ni minsan ay hindi sumagi sa isip ko na siya ang pumatay kay Mommy, pero ibang-iba ang nangyari sa panaginip ko.

In my dream, Kye was holding Mom's heart and he even asked me if I missed him. Isa lang naman ang ibig sabihin n'on kung sakali-- siya ang pumatay kay Mommy. I didn't believe in this, not until my friend told me about him.

"You mean he's the one killing the ladies in Luxvard?" I asked.

He nodded. "Lahat ng pagpatay na nangyari sa campus ay siya ang gumawa. Binalak nga niya akong patayin, buti na lang nakaligtas ako."

I was speechless of astonishment.

"He even followed me when I ran away. Akala ko katapusan na ng buhay ko. Buti na lang nakayanan ko pang makauwi dito sa bahay. That was just the time he stopped chasing me... w-when I finally reached the gate.

"Margot," he held my hands, "he is the killer. Believe me, we can prove that."

Hindi ko pa rin magawang makapagsalita. I was still trying to comprehend things. Parang ang hirap kasing paniwalaan na si Kye ang gumagawa ng mga pagpatay, pero dahil si Psalm ang nagsabi, naniniwala ako. Besides, that man also appeared in my dream. Baka nga sign na ito.

"S-sa tingin mo ba siya rin ang pumatay kay M-mommy?" tanong ko.

Bumuntong-hininga siya. "Hindi ko sigurado, pero hindi malabo."

"But, how about Marcus?"

"Ewan ko, hindi ko rin sigurado. We don't know if Marcus is Kye's companion. Hindi pa malinaw sa atin ang lahat, so, we should dig deeper."

Sandali akong natigilan. Hindi ko talaga maisip na si Kye ang gumawa ng lahat ng ito. Hindi ko matanggap.

"Sigurado ka bang siya talaga ang pumapatay sa mga babae sa campus?"

"Hindi ka ba naniniwala sa 'kin?"

"Hindi naman sa gano'n, nagtataka lang ako kung bakit at paano niya ginagawa 'yon," sagot ko. "Parang ang hirap kasing isipin."

"Okay, I knew it," he sighed. "You don't believe me at all."

"Hoy, ano ka ba? Sabing naniniwala ako, eh. Sabi ko nga, naguguluhan lang ako. But if you want us to dig deeper, payag ako. Besides, this is what I've been looking for."

"Good," he said. "But, I want you to know that it will not be easy for the two of us lalo na't hindi normal na tao si Kye."

Nagkunot ako ng noo. "Anong ibig mong sabihin na hindi siya normal na tao?"

Humugot muna siya ng isang malalim na hininga bago muling nagsalita. "Margot," he spoke my name, "may dugong bampira si Kye."

I couldn't feel my heart beating. If what I was hearing was true, then it would be really hard for me to breathe. Si Kye ay isa nga bang bampira?

Gulong-gulo na ang isip ko. Tila buhol na sinulid ang mga ideyang pumapasok sa utak ko. Hindi ako makapag-isip nang maayos lalo na't ang hirap intindihin ng mga sinasabi ni Psalm.

"Paano mo nasabi?" tanong ko. I didn't want my best friend to feel like I was doubting him, but I just couldn't control myself to ask. I wanted to know more.

"When he attacked me in my car, nakita ko ang paglabas ng mga pangil niya. These scratches?" he pointed out the ones in his arms. "Galing ang mga 'to sa matutulis niyang kuko. If only I could take picture of him while trying to bite me, I'll do, pero hindi ako tanga para gawin 'yon.

"Sobrang bilis niya ring gumalaw, kaya ang laki rin ng pagtataka kong nakaligtas ako at nakatakas ako sa kaniya. Pero sa tingin ko rin kasi, hinayaan niya talaga akong makatakas."

"B-bakit?"

"I don't know, maybe he has still something to do with me."

Napahawak na lamang ako sa noo ko. Sinusubukan kong paniwalain ang sarili ko sa mga sinasabi ni Psalm. To my surprise, I had realized some things that could serve as our proofs.

Noong unang beses na may nangyaring pagpatay sa school, may napansin akong kakaiba kay Kye. I could still remember when I was all alone at the cafeteria, he came. Akala ko ketchup ang nasa bibig niya, pero posible rin palang dugo iyon, hindi ba?

I could think he was after that killing and he just forgot to wipe his mouth before facing me. Hindi rin naman siguro siya ganoon kadungis kumain.

Mayroon pang araw noong magkausap kaming dalawa sa newsroom; he brought out the topic of killings in Luxvard. I was confused with what he had told me that no person was included in the incident, so no person should be blamed. Hindi ko magawang itanong sa kaniya iyon noon, pero ngayon ay may hinuha na ako. Hindi ba sinabi niya iyon dahil gusto niyang iparating sa akin na hindi nga tao, kung hindi isang bampira ang may gawa sa lahat ng ito?

And after all, vampires were real.

"Psalm, I want to know more," I said. "Pagtulungan natin 'tong dalawa. I want to investigate. Gusto kong malaman kung may kinalaman din si Kye sa pagpatay kay Mommy."

He smiled. "I love the spirit, BFF. But you have to member this always: hindi biro ang kinakalaban natin."

Napalunok ako. "I know, that's why we need each other's guide. Hindi rin naman kasi natin puwedeng i-report ito kasi wala tayong hawak na pruweba."

"Indeed. So kailan tayo magsisimula?"

"Bukas magsisimula na ako," sagot ko. "Ikaw, dito ka muna dahil hindi ka pa puwedeng pumasok dahil diyan sa mga sugat mo. Nag-aalala rin ako baka atakihin ka niya ulit. Hindi natin alam kung anong susunod na mangyayari."

"Huwag kang mag-alala, hindi ako magsasalita para hindi niya tayo mahalata," sambit niya. "Ang iniisip ko lang din ay ikaw."

"Don't you worry about me, BFF. Alam kong may kapit ako kay Kye. Sisiguraduhin ko namang malinis akong gumawa. Basta huwag mo akong isipin, ang isipin mo ay 'yang sarili mo. Magpagaling ka para sa mga susunod na araw ay may kasangga na ulit ako."

Tumango siya't ngumiti. "Para sa 'yo at para kay Tita Liona."

Kinabukasan sa campus, si Kye agad ang una kong nakita. Pareho kaming papasok sa building, kaya hindi ko alam kung paano ko siya pakitutunguhan. I was scared, nervous at the same time.

"Oh, medyo late ka ngayon ha compared sa normal mong pagpasok..." sambit ko.

May pag-aalinlangan man ay sinubukan ko pa rin siyang lapitan at kausapin. If I would avoid him, he might notice that there was something wrong going on.

"I was reading articles last night, that's why," he answered.

"Oh, I see. Mga anong oras ka naman natulog?"

He sharply looked at me. "What does it have to do with you?"

"Wala, nagtatanong lang," sagot ko. "Grabe ang sungit mo naman, umagang-umaga. Parang hindi maganda ang araw mo kahapon ah, kaya hanggang ngayon ay bad trip ka."

"What does my yesterday have to do with my present?"

"Tae," mahinang sabi ko.

Dahil hindi na siya nagsalita ay hindi na rin ako nagsalita. Ang hirap niya rin kasing kausap lalo na't sobrang init naman ng ulo niya ngayon.

Nang makarating na ako sa block namin ay hindi man lang siya nagpaalam sa akin. Wala akong narinig na kahit ano sa kaniya dahil dire-diretso lamang siya sa paglakad. Ano bang problema n'on?

Habang tutok na tutok ako sa pakikinig ay bigla na lamang may dumating sa room at nagsabing tinatawag daw ako sa publishing room. It was the first time I was called during class for journalism. Ano kayang meron?

Pagkarating ko roon ay may mga journalist na sa loob, kabilang na si Lucille. Tumabi ako rito at itinanong agad kung anong gagawin.

"Announcement about the contest," she answered.

Bumilis naman ang t***k ng puso ko. Kinakabahan ako, sa totoo lang. Sobrang dami naming pinagdaanan at sobrang hirap ng naging proseso, kaya sana naman ay mabuting balita ang maririnig namin galing sa mga School Paper Adviser namin.

"Good morning, everyone," sambit ng head namin na nakatayo na sa harapan. "We're very sorry to call you at this point. This announcement is urgent. You know, we have been called by the division an hour ago, asking our journalists if they are willing to join the workshop that's going to happen in the region.

"Good news, we have been qualifed! Kaya ipinapatawag din tayo sa regional para ihanda kayong lahat dahil nga kinakitaan nila kayo ng potential."

Everyone clapped on the good news. Bakas na bakas ang galak sa bawat isa dahil sa huli, worth it lahat ng pagod namin.

Maging sa akin ay hindi mapawi ang ngiti. Parang wala na nga iyong balak maalis. Sobrang nakatutuwa lang dahil hindi kailanman naging mali ang pagpasok ko sa grupong ito. Journalism and this team never disappointed me.

"To be announced ang venue, but it's much better na ngayon pa lang ay naghahanda na kayo. Though it's not a requirement... not everyone is required to join, I am still asking for all your presence to attend the workshop. This is a big help for us, especially that we are placing the top. Don't worry, sagot ng university ang lahat ng gastos."

Lahat ay nagsipalakpakan sa sinabing iyon ng head. Kung wala kaming problema sa gastos, eh 'di sasama talaga kaming lahat. Besides, the workshop is a big advantage to us, lalo na rin sa aking malapit nang magtapos sa kolehiyo.

"For your confirmation, we will be waiting until tomorrow."

Pagkatapos ng anunsyong iyon ay nagsibalikan na rin kami sa kaniya-kaniya naming silid. Hindi talaga maalis ang ngiti sa mukha ko lalo na't magiging isang matibay na daan din ang workshop para mas lalo kong makilala si Kye.

Gusto ko na sanang ipaalam lahat kay Psalm ang mga nangyari sa araw na ito, ngunit hindi ko pa magawa dahil may duty ako sa agency. After class, doon ang diretso ko.

Naging maayos ang daloy ng trabaho ko at wala namang nangyaring kung ano. Minsan, inaasahan kong tatawag ulit sa akin ang boses ni Marcus, pero hindi na ulit nangyari iyon.

On the next day at school, I was having lunch at the cafeteria all by myself not until Kye came, holding a tray of food.

"Alone?" he asked.

Tumango ako. "May sakit kasi si Psalm, kaya ayun hindi pa siya puwedeng pumasok."

He took a seat and put down the food he was holding. "Okay, I'll be eating here with you."

My eyes widened. "Ano?"

"I said I'll be eating here with you."

Hindi ko na nagawa pang tumanggi dahil nagsimula na siyang sumubo ng pagkain. Hindi ko naman siya puwedeng itulak papalayo dahil wala akong karapatan. Magmumukha rin akong bastos sa ganoong paraan.

"Would you mind if I ask you?" I said, trying to crack the silence between us.

He shook his head.

"Wala ka bang kasamang kumakain?"

"I have, but he's all fine in the room. I just want to be with you this time since you're all alone. It's somehow unhealthy to eat without a companion."

"Eh, paano naman 'yong kasama mo?"

"Don't worry, may mga kasama siya sa classroom."

"Oh, okay. Off-topic," I said. "You know... I feel so lucky whenever I had the chance to talk with you."

Nagkunot-noo siya. "And why?"

"Uhm, nothing. I mean I don't know. I mean... maybe because you are famous and many girls on this campus are admiring you?"

"I'm not famous," he replied in a very cold manner.

"You are, so don't me. Halos lahat kaya ng estudyante rito ay kilala ka."

"So you think that's a valid reason to be called famous?"

"A-ah, oo?"

"Ang babaw."

Napalunok ako. "Galit?"

He shook his head. "Ang babaw lang ng definition mo sa famous."

"Oh, okay. Fine, hindi na. Sige, mababaw na," simangot ko. "Are you happy now?"

"I'm always happy," he answered.

"Happy pero nakasimangot?"

He nodded.

"May gano'n bang happy?"

He sharply looked at me. "You don't need to smile just to tell everyone you are happy. You can't always see something on the outside, more often than not, real emotion is inside. Here..." he said as he placed his palm to his chest.

"Sungit naman," sambit ko. "Ikaw 'tong unang lumapit sa akin pero ikaw 'tong nagsusungit sa akin. Ngumiti ka naman diyan, hindi 'yong lagi kang bad mood. Sige na, patingin."

"I'm happy deep inside, no need to smile."

"Isa lang, damot. Sige na, one smile only, please," I pouted.

When I insisted, he forced a smile. Ngumiti talaga siya, hindi nga lang halata dahil sa sobrang tipid.

"'Yong labas ang ngipin," suhestiyon ko.

"I smiled already, that's enough."

"Smile na 'yon?" tanong ko. "Parang hindi naman, eh. C'mon, one more time, 'yong labas ang ngipin."

"Okay, this will be the last. Don't force me again, you promise."

"Okay, promise," I smiled as I raised my right hand.

Unti-unti niyang ibininat ang kaniyang labi hanggang sa masilip ko na nang kaunti ang ngipin niya. Sobrang pilit, kaya tawang-tawa ako.

"What's funny?" he asked.

"Alam mo para kang isang bata na pinilit picture-an ng nanay," tawa ko.

Hindi naman siya umimik, tinitigan lang niya ako nang masama. Kung pagyaman lang ang ganoong mga titig, siguro ay milyonaryo na siya.

I stopped laughing and drank some water. "Anyway, we will be having an activity tomorrow sa PE subject namin. I hope you'll come."

Bahagya muna siyang uminom ng tubig bago muling magsalita. "What time? I don't have any vacant tomorrow," he replied.

"Ah, gano'n ba? Well, it's okay, next time na lang siguro."

Isang matipid na okay lang ang natanggap ko mula sa kaniya.

Kinabukasan, nagsimula na kami sa activity namin. It was a Zumba competition. Actually, I hate this subject because I wasn't confident in my dancing. Physical Education shouldn't be mandatory in college. Hays!

There were five groups, and my team was second to the last. We were the next performer, so I got really nervous. Ilang minuto pa ay natapos na ang isang grupo, so my group went to the stage right after them. As we fixed our formation, my heart beat faster than I expected. Well, I thought this was really the feeling when you weren't confident enough of what you were doing.

I took a deep breath before the music played and before we started dancing. I was so shy of the crowd and I was trembling with nervosity.

Nasa kalagitnaan na kami ng sayaw nang namataan ko si Kye na nanonood sa amin. What the hell was he doing here? I mean, akala ko ba wala siyang vacant?

When our eyes met, I forced a smile. Mabilis din akong nag-iwas ng tingin. Ilang minuto pa ay natapos na rin kaming sumayaw. After we performed, nilapitan ko agad siya.

"Oh, I thought wala kang vacant ngayon?" tanong ko.

"I made an excuse. I said I'm going to the comfort room so I could go outside, but the real thing is I just wanted to go here and watch you perform."

"Ay," pagtikom ko sa bibig ko.

"By the way, you did well."

"T-thank you..." medyo nahihiya ko pang sabi. When he didn't say anything, I slapped his shoulder slightly. "Hoy, baka mahuli ka na sa klase n'yo. You should go back to your room now."

"Okay, but before I go, I just wanna tell you something about the workshop."

"Okay, go ahead," I smiled.

"I don't know if I should be speaking this to you. But you know, I just feel the excitement even more especially now that I know you'll be going."

My knees seemed to weaken after hearing those words. But no, I shouldn't be feeling this way. We were not lovers here, but we were rivals. There was no way to feel that different kind of thrill.

No way.